Well, TMO never did claim to be a realism mod. (I encountered the Y-throwers right after you first put them on any ship, about a year ago if I recall). Escorts can and will locate you precisely below the layer without ever pinging you. They will answer the dinner bell from 2000 yards when you are at silent running and with a bad aspect ratio. Already, lots happens in TMO that didn't generally happen in real life.
It's still not up to the brutal Atlantic scene, especially with the most popular mod configuration. But it's darned challenging. It WILL get you killed and you can do everything right just to die. But that was real warfare too.
It can be argued that TMO, by giving you unrealistic danger, makes you play the game realistically. The real guys didn't know the capabilities of their enemies at all. We can just do research and game the system.
Or some bright modder reads that the vast majority of boats survived the war so he mods depth charges so the outcome is about the same percentage. Unfortunately, this means that a depth charge can explode on deck and you just continue on because it takes multiple hits even to damage you, several to kill you. Knowing this, you stay at periscope depth as the DD passes over, calmly sending one up the poop chute after he passes, knowing his DCs are harmless. Can you call that realism without laughing?
Realism isn't a static and well defined target. Its a frustrating and hidden target. In spite of that, TMO doesn't pretend to be realistic. In fact, it sneers in realism's general direction!
