If you like "realism", I have some answers to your questions:
I suggest you GWX 3.0 definitely +SH3 Commander.
There's an online group, very well organized, with daily standard missions, campaign missions and so on, and its online address is
http://nordfront.org/xvii-flottille/
You can take a look there, maybe you will find what you're looking for. By the way, I've used to think of myself the exactly way that you do about yourself in this moment, but when I've joined that group, I've changed my mind a little ...
