I see supermarkets are now offering a 'bag for life'.
The church has been doing that for centuries. It's called marriage.
While attending a marriage Encounter Weekend, my wife and I listened to the instructor declare, "It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other."
He addressed the men: "Can you each name and describe your wife's favourite flower?"
I leaned over, touched my wife's arm gently and whispered, "Self-raising, isn't it?"
My friend recently got divorced from his wife. He told me, "marriage is like a prison."
I thought to myself, "That’s not true. At least in prison you get to have anal sex."
My wife and I know we had to make a few sacrifices for our marriage to work, but child protection services are starting to ask a lot of questions.
A man and woman were having marital problems so they went to see a marriage counsellor.
The counsellor, in an attempt to find some common ground from which to begin his analysis said, "Tell me about anything the two of you have in common." The husband spoke up and said, "Well, neither one of us sucks dicks."
At the mariage retreat, Ben and Mary are given a test. They have to write a sentence with the words 'love' and 'sex' in it.
Mary writes: "When two people are passionately and deeply in love and respect each other very much, it is spiritually and morally acceptable for them to engage in the act of sex."
Ben writes: "I love sex"