Humour: I need some advice for my part time job
 

Times being tough, I have decided to take a part time job writing greeting card sayings for Hallmark. It does not pay much but I can do it on my own time.

Hallmark, first wants me to send some samples of my writings.

Wadda think of these card sayings:

My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat.
When I looked at the tire...
I noticed your cat.
Sorry!



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Heard your wife left you, how upset you must be.
But don't fret about it... She moved in with me.



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Looking back over the years that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder... 'What the hell was I thinking?'



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Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.



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How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?



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I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love
After having met you .. I've changed my mind.



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I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.



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As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me.



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Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...
Would you like to take this knife out of my back?
You'll probably need it again.



************************************************** *****************************************


When we were together, you always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up, I think it's time you kept your promise.



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We have been friends for a very long time ..
let's say we stop?



++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ +++++++



I'm so miserable without you,
it's almost like you're here.



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Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was?



Think I have a shot at the job?

:D