How do you cope?
 

Well It's been a year now since I left the Military and I was wandering how do/did you guys cope/find it when you first got back?

How did you feel about the military while you were in? That can have an effect on post-service mindset. I've sort of let life happen to me, which is almost certainly why I haven't accomplished a lot. While I was in I was in. War experience was what it was. When I was out I was out. Life is life. It's all good.

I got into volunteering in the community, joined the local Search and Rescue society and am now in charge of training for the group. Don't know what it's like in your neck of the woods but I would imagine there are many agencies crying out for motivated people used to serving for a greater good. For me, volunteerism has largely filled the hole left by not being "part of the team" anymore.

Like Steve says, Life is Life. You can never go back so dwelling on what was is a huge waste of energy.

I guess I was lucky, I was able to transfer to a civilian job that was almost exactly like what I was doing in the military. The only difference for me was that I had to wear a suit (everyone has a "uniform") and receive a little more than twice my pay.

But I realize that not everyone in the military can transfer so cleanly. That is one of the reasons I left EOD. Civilian jobs for EOD are limited.

If it is not too personal, can we ask what your concerns are? If you prefer to discuss this in PM, please feel free to PM me.

I would like to help if I can, baring that, I make a pretty good sounding board to bitch to. :D

That's true too, but my own point and experience are just the opposite. I adjusted well because I take it easy - perhaps too easy. For someone who lives life more intensely it may be harder to adjust to any new thing, especially post-military life.

If there are specific problems he needs to figure out exactly what they are and what he can do about them. Someone who has been through that adjustment phase can probably give better advice than I can.

Randomizer, it sounds like you're one of those who made the adjustment.

The only problems I have is the constant waiting for something to happen, checking windows for snipers. I miss my gear as well

Ah, then perhaps the issue is not coping with being out of the military, but coping with being out of combat. The two are not the same.

The last time I was in "combat" was 1983 so my experiences probably won't relate to your experiences.

This sounds serious. Do you have access to mental health programs?

Your wisdom and temperment speak otherwise. Accomplishment should never be limited to station.

I just don't think about it, if I do i try to force my train of thought elsewhere, also not taking life seriously and laughing at pretty much anything helps.

Be thankfull your above ground and, breathing.

Others weren't so lucky. Just do the best you can and things in time will become clear.

Good Luck :up:

That's true thanks


(I maybe missing a few marbles but I ain't crazy )

The one's that tell me their totally sane are the one's that scare me. :haha:

Already you sound like you have a grip on things. :up:

Hang in their buddy. :)

Yup, take care of yourself and don't ignore those instincts of un-safety. You gotta have someone to talk to about them that you trust, otherwise things like that can eat you alive. All the tough character and training in the world can't reverse the fact that trauma sticks in human brains, and the worst thing you can do is pretend it's not there when it clearly is. And while I've never been in service as such, trust me, I can speak from personal experience on that.

And a massive respect to you and the other service veterans here. Thanks for doing what you did, whenever and wherever you served :salute:

You know, coincidentally that is the hardest thing for me to deal with, other men I was in basic with who are no longer here would be much better alive than I have been.

For me it was tough, I was invalided out of the Royal Navy and went through years of ... well lets just say I was a little down and leave it at that:damn:

I eventualy managed to get a job as Computer Science Lecturer teaching Graduate below and above software engineering, graphics, hardware design and apps progamming.

It was a brave new world in the mid eighties and I was lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time.

Now I am retired and build models... But I still dream about being in the RN and wake up thinking WTF happend.

Your military sevice and mindset never leave yoo and yoo just have to to adapt.

Remember Civvys need a cuddle before they acquiesce to your commands erm decisions :D

At least that's what my wife tells me :arrgh!:

Cheers

garion
AkA Jevhaddah