Crits/Comments about US Navy
 

As of lately, my girlfriend/fiance left me about a month before we were supposed to get married, which completely flipped my life upside down. My grades dropped in school, and my work performance didn't exactly hold up to par. But I did get a raise last week which was nice.

But that's not why I'm writing now, I still seem to be in a rut. Here I am, about to turn 20 on the 29th this month, and I feel my life is going nowhere.

I don't have the same output on life like i did before. Before the break up I could play SH3, work on my little indie game, and watch Das Boot 20x a month. Now I can barely even get on the computer without feeling like a low-down, piece of **** sloth that has no life.

When I'm not at school or work, I'm home alone, and that's probably the worst thing for me. The quiet just makes me feel lonely and depressed. I have friends yes, but due to their schedules usually conflicting with mine it usually takes some planning and time to get together, and it's not altogether that often.

Basically I've decided to make some changes in my life, and this afternoon I called a Navy Recruiter to come out and sit down with me and my family and talk about joining. This is where I'd like your guys opinions, what do you think about a college student with a part-time job at Wal-Mart in Electronics still living at home with his parents joining the navy?

I'm not altogether out of shape, I used to play football in high school but lost a lot of my muscle mass and weight, and couldn't run a mile under 10 minutes anymore. But I'm still "in shape" if you get what I'm saying. I could start running again, and get back in shape before boot camp, or whatever the navy has. So the physical part wouldn't be that difficult. Also I'm good at making friends, so in training I could make and meet friends, and since we'd be together almost all the time I wouldn't feel lonely.

I'm a good fast learner, and have always loved the military, from the civil war onwards, and I think that this would be a good direction to head my life into. The more i think about it the more excited I get, but I know a lot of you were in the navy before, and want to know what you think.

Thanks for your help,
Chad

The first paragraph Chad makes me think you should give this some more serious thought before you leap.:yep:

This is a big life changeing thing and you don't want to go into this for the wrong reasons.


I wish you the best matey. :up:

Don't join the military because you want friends.

You sound depressed and that can become a serious disorder. Deal with this problem before making the decision to enlist.

Okay, I just want some direction in my life. I feel like i'm going no where. This is why I think it would be a good decision.

My love for the sea, when i was younger we travelled to Florida all the time, and i just love the smell, sound, and plain sight of it. I've always been a good swimmer and can hold my breath for about a minute, which probably doesn't matter but water is like second nature.

When I first bought Sh2 i didn't know the difference betweeen a bow plane and a depth charge. I have to admit, i was never really that interested in submarines or the naval warfare part of things. But the wolfpack league, and subsim really informed me on a lot and that's where i learned and became hooked on it. They also taught me some stuff like programming, like the .sdf files that SH2 came with for mission scripting. That led me to develop my own game.
/\ So what i guess i'm trying to say here, is that i've really grown a respect for such technological advanced things. And I'm quick to adapt and learn how to use and operate such equipment.

It is for myself. I'm not joining to live up to a family tradition, to prove something, or show-off. I want to do this, I want to serve my country, and when I'm dead and my family comes to see my grave, I want the American flag flying next to my grave, showing I served my country the best I can.

And, as I mentioned in my previous post, I want direction in life. Maybe I can learn a new skill, or expand my knowledge in one I already had. So that after I retire or get released, I can easily get a job with my experience in the field.

Nothing is final, i'm going to pray about it, talk to friends and family, and last, the recruiter to see what options are available for me, and see where things go.

What kind of education are you in right now?

It's usually best to finish school, then move on.

Sorry to hear about your troubles. But there will always be times in life like that.

Think carefully before you decide to enlist, however. If you can go to college or have any opportunity to land a decent union job or something (which will likely pay more than what you would make for years out of college) I would look at doing those things first.

If you do decide to enlist, remember a few things.

1) Assume anything the recruiter promises you is a lie unless you get it in writing.

2) Talk to any friends who have enlisted and get their advice. If you don't have any enlisted friends, I'll be your friend:D .

3) Take a good look at all branches, not just the Navy. Make sure you ask about, and get (in writing) any guarantees for enlistment bonuses you can.

4) Make sure you are prepared to spend a good part of your life being controlled. Not sure about the Navy but most of the time th USMC doesn't let you sleep, eat, sit or s*** unless you are authorized to do so. And it better be quick.

5) Have a plan B. If you enlist elect not to re-enlist or make a career of it, be sure you have some groundwork laid for a civvie job. Choosing a useful MOS that can be applied in civilian life helps a lot. Computer or network-oriented jobs are some of the best for that.

6) Assuming you decide to go ahead with it, ask your recruiter about poolee (persons slated to enlist soon) meetings and attend them.
Ask the military personnel every question that comes to mind. Try to learn some basic drill and marching. It will save you hours and hours of pain and being screamed at.

7) If you want to enlist but have some doubts, join the reserves. If you like it you can always go to active duty, but if you don't like active duty, you can't go to the reserves.

8) Never, NEVEREVEREVEREVEREVEREVER, accept an "open" MOS. 9 times out of 10 you just agreed to take the crappiest job they have available. And for the love of all that is holy, actually READ the contract. Double-check everything. I almost signed up for infantry because my recruiter goofed.


I can really sympathize with your situation. My experience was just a little different but similar overall.
I joined the Marine Corps straight out of high school. I shipped out the day after graduation. I would have to write a book to describe the shock and pain of boot camp. It wasn't so much the physical element that was hard. It was being trapped there, with no freedom to do anything I wanted. When my feet hurt I could not sit down. When I was tired I could not sleep. When I was thirsty I could not drink.
Everything, sometimes down to the slightest movement of my body, could only be done with permission. Sometimes you can't even ask permission. You just have to hope they say "drink water" or "use the head" (bathroom for those who don't know)

I graduated boot camp in August 01. Ten days later I was in Camp Pendelton's School of Infantry and barely a week later 9/11 happened.
Things went downhill from there. My girlfriend left me because she "wasn't going to wait while I went to war". My parents got divorced and my grandfather died, along with my horse.

Half a year later, when I finally got to come home, my life as I knew it was gone.
But, the military does do one thing for people in these situations. If you take your training to heart, and embrace the traditions, you gain a discipline not available anywhere else. For me, failure simply lost its meaning. Because of the Marines I know I can do anything, and no matter how badly things may go for me, or how much a loser I may be at some point in my life, I will always be able to hold my head high and say "I am a true servant of my country, and my people. I have nothing to prove."


Well that about sums it up. Whether the military is right for you or not depends on the kind of person you are. If pride in yourself and doing "what's right" is important to you it may be a good choice. If your sole concern is getting rich or "keeping up with the Joneses" you may be disappointed.

If you choose the Navy, know that it is a fine service, with a long and distinguished history that you can be proud of. Just watch out for those Marines, they think they're sooooooooo cool:roll:

P.S. it also comes with the benefit of hundreds of hours of fun shooting the s*** with your enlisted friends, drinking beer and swapping war stories:up:


PM me if you need anything, and good luck!

-the Lance

I'd say do it. You will learn a lot! :up: Besides, 20 is way too young to get married. I waited till I was 28! You need to live life, you need to live life being 21 without being married. You will both want this - trust me on that. You will feel like you missed a part of your life if you get married this early. In a few years, maybe you can get back together again if you want, but for now - you need to see the world without being hitched. Navy is a great way to do that, and learn skills and dicipline at the same time!

Chances are, when you go for a few years at this, you will see the mistake you were making. She left because she wasn't sure. That is the problem - you are too young to know if its the 'sure' thing. As far as I'm concerned, her breaking it off is probably the best thing that happened to both of you at this point, yet I hardly doubt you realize it yet.

Am I making sense? Don't be down on this. Look at it as an opportunity to find out what 'you' really want in life. When i was 20, I thought i knew it all, but I didn't know squat.

-S

No, you old geezer:rotfl:
Yeah wait till you're 25. I do know everything now!:know:

I think you realize how much you don't know the older you get! Maybe I'm getting old since I know this? I think when you hit 30 is when you first realize that you really don't know anything!

I feel like I'm spewing wisdom now, and thats bad since it takes age to have true wisdom. Ah oh! :-?

-S

Did she say why? :-?

And for the time don't make hasty decisions, take some time to get yourself back on track.

Man, I have to be 30 to know how dumb I am? I didn't think I could get any dumber. That's depressing:cry:

Two things.

First, if you join the military for any other reason than wanting to be with the military by heart and soul, then you are an idiot, and only a fool would like the perspective of going into battle with you by his side. It is not a simple job like any other. You eventually end up killing or getting killed, hurt others and getting hurt. Don't engage in this as a profession just because you have forgotten where your Mom has hidden the candies. This is not a job like any other, and you must not join the military just because you are looking for friends. That is stupid. there are many more ways to find friends.

Second, you said you can't stand being at home alone. I say: listen to the silence. It has a lot to tell you about yourself. I am always alarmed about people who can't be alone, because they are always - always! - running away, mostly from themselves, from uncomfortable questions. I also never met a person who can't be alone and was happy with all the action he/she filled her life with in order to evade the silence. It is just distraction from what really bothers you. If you always need the silence being filled with chatter, you cannot listen to any answers. If you can't stay alone with yourself, you don't live your life - you get lived: by others, and their standards and norms and opinions and deeds and actions.

avoiding the silence and joining the military for wrong reasons will do you no good, when taking for real what you wrote about your life. It may keep you so busy that you do not ask questions, and must not face your hidden self that torments you with the Why of your life - but that way you will never face yourself, you will never recongise yourself, and one day when it all comes to the end for you you will have lived your life in vain.

For some people, the military is the right thing. But never is the military the right thing for everybody. And my impression is for you it would just be another way to run away.

regarding your fiance: lket her go. ease your grip. If it is true that she left forever, then your part in this chapter of life is over. You are not the first, and won't be the last suffering this fate. Your fate is nothing special at all. So let it go, leave it behind, move on. time will heal the wounds. and at löeast you know that she is living on a life. If you really felt love, you should know by know that love does not need the poessession of the other, but wishes the other what is best for him/her no matter if you ghet your personal desires rewarded or not. True love canot be selfish. If you claim your desire to be the ultimate standard, then you did not love.

Sorry if I sound rude, but call it therapeutical cruelty.

And one final last thing. It's always better to use your freedom to direct yourself than getting directed by others. Because in this world most times the others will not mean it well with you. You want direction in your life? What's hindering you to try and find out? It's all laid out in front of you, wide and open, so see your options, and make use of them. By actually doing whatever you do you find out soon enough wether it will satisfy you or not. Just don't give your freedom away too easily. If you do - make sure that it is worth it.

That was a little harsh. He didn't say he wanted to join JUST because he was looking for firends.
Why are you assuming that Mr. Chad is looking to join the military because he pines for his fiancee' or is only turning to it in desperation?

He is looking at the military as an option because he feels like his life is going nowhere and is looking for some direction. He already said he has always loved the military. Skybird, you make it sound like he is inherently wrong for considering it, given his current state.

Most of what you need to consider has been said, so I'll just calm your mind on one thing: Don't worry about whether you're in shape or not. Boot camp will take care of that.

@ Subman1: You are so absolutely right on the "know-it-all" thing. Awhile back on these very boards I repeated the old phrase "The more I learn, the less I know." Somebody came back with "That makes no sense." The only reply I could think of was "That's because you're young and still know everything.":rotfl:

I think this right here is the reality of the situation. I recommend a PM conversation or use IM. I think Undersealcpl can be a big help in your decision. Sounds like he has his boots on tight and knows the drill. :up: