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-   -   just call me Bernard (https://www.subsim.com/radioroom/showthread.php?t=107665)

Keelbuster 03-16-07 11:03 AM
just call me Bernard
 
Mother of all burns last night. Radio reports allow me to intercept a fast moving TF moving down the TF corridor from ireland to gibraltar. It was nighttime, and the dark shapes approached rapidly while I scrambled to get close to the center lane. The big shadow in the middle was a BB. I was pleasantly nervous. They were bashing along, so they didn't hear my approach, waves covered my periscope, and i had four T2s ready in the front. At optimal firing position i was 800m from the BB. Firing solution was locked in - 18kts from the radio report, 90degrees starboard, and 800m. All the tubes were open, and set to 6m. I popped up the scope, and as the ship passed 0 gyro, i fired 1....2....3....4, so that he would take one hit at even intervals along his width. It was a deadly recipe. Periscope down. Wait...think....wait - what did I just see??! I pop it back up - BB is at 340 - not where i expected! What? How? As the giant ship crosses 0, I wonder...what happened to my torps? All the hit times have passed and i'm thinking FCK. Then boom.....boom (where!?)....boom - i see water flashing up behind the BB ...She's Going Down! ...boom -- BOOOM. Massive explosion. A cruiser running in parallel with the BB has been totally demolished by four hits. The BB is unscathed. Arg! At the moment of firing, in looking through my scope at 8x, I didn't recognize that i was firing at a cruiser and not the BB:damn: There's nothing i can do..the BB steams off at 18 kts. I start chugging along - as usual, TF escorts are worthless and don't find me. The depression sets in...I totally blew it. Burnard. Bigtime.

Sailor Steve 03-16-07 11:04 AM
"Congratulations. Keep up the good work"-Winston Churchill

rasmus1896 03-16-07 11:31 AM
Bernard Bernard Bernard Bernard.:)

you asked for it;)

Penelope_Grey 03-16-07 11:44 AM
Aww! Don't be nasty! Its a simple enough mistake to make! Or does somebody need their heads bouncing off an Uzo or an attack periscope?

AVGWarhawk 03-16-07 11:46 AM
Ok, hello Bernard:roll:

rasmus1896 03-16-07 12:30 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Penelope_Grey
Aww! Don't be nasty! Its a simple enough mistake to make! Or does somebody need their heads bouncing off an Uzo or an attack periscope?
this is a difficult question

Morts 03-16-07 12:40 PM
Hey Bernard:up:

:rotfl: :rotfl:

Hakahura 03-16-07 12:52 PM
No

I'm Bernard and so's my other careers

High Voltage 03-16-07 12:57 PM
Hey Keelbuster, you would still qualify as the smartest officer on some of my patrols...:nope::nope:

Keelbuster 03-16-07 01:22 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by High Voltage
Hey Keelbuster, you would still qualify as the smartest officer on some of my patrols...:nope::nope:
Har...yea - trying to look at the bright side here - at least i hit something:)

STEED 03-16-07 01:40 PM
Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard.

Mush Martin 03-16-07 01:44 PM
Well Kurt Jurgens was wrong after all!

we have not yet taken the humanity out of warfare.:up:

Jimbuna 03-16-07 02:05 PM
Take the renown and heed the lesson :D :arrgh!:

U-104 03-16-07 04:13 PM
Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard

Sailor Steve 03-16-07 04:37 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by STEED
Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard, Bernard.
I'm gonna hate myself for this, but is that sung to the tune of "Spam, spam, spam, spam"?


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