Granted, it invalidates Stealth Hunter's crushed dream and therefore destroys the universe

I wish you people would stop drinking so much, sheesh... :roll:

Granted, now we'll drink too much.

I wish you'd mind your own business.

http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...e/drunkcob.gif

Granted, but his new business is examining Forum members drinking habits and personal lives. His next project is a fibre-optic video link from your beer fridge to his computer.

I wish I had a beer fridge.

Granted, you have a beer fridge, but the problem is the beer you bought isn't pasteurized! So you dump all of the bad beer and don't have enough money to buy one can of beer!

I wish all food and drink are non-perishable...

Granted, but all their pershiableness is transferred to you

I wish for spaenvzpievousnrounsbb0sgfhfsfbxd~~

Granted, but as I couldn't be bothered to find out what it was it's largely irrelevant.

I wish by barbecue was self cleaning.

Granted, but if it was self cleaning, it would be also self barbecuing and that's where all the fun is.

I wish I could go back to work, I'm tired of sitting here and doing nothing

Granted you can go back to work as a customer,

I wish my car was a transformer.

Granted, your car now transforms 120 volts into 6.8 volts. It is also full of toxic PCB's and sits at the top of a hydro pole. It can no longer be driven at all and this voltage is entirely useless to you. But, you still get to pay the licence and insurance fees.

I wish my truck was rust-free.

Granted, all the rust your truck can have...FOR FREE!

I wish the Universe was destruction-proof

Granted, as the universe keeps expanding and expanding humans will colonize the whole universe. As time progresses, wars of cosmic scale will engulf the universe Unfortunately, Mankind will wipe out itself in the end and the universe will continue to expand. Raptor1 will be the only one left, still playing SH3, alone.......

I wish ballpoint ink is erasable, not counting using correction fluid.

Granted, but in so doing, it will eventually fade away entirely.

I wish that I could have a cage fight with Heinrich Himmler...:hmm:

Granted, but it goes on for so long that they they have to introduce Bigfoot into the cage in order to finish the fight, you both die and Bigfoot takes the money

I wish you would go away...no, not you, the other one

Granted, but that means that anyone who reads your post will go away, making it the deadliest e-post in the universe.

I wish that I could cage fight with Heinrich Himmler, Adolf Hitler, AND Erwin Rommel!:rotfl:

Granted, they mercilessly beat you into the floor, the judge can't see whether you are down or not so the fighting (Or should I say, one-sided beating) continues until the 10 minute marker is reached and Bigfoot is once again released into the cage, killing everyone...again

I wish Bigfoot wasn't so good at cage fights