Granted, Mr. Hugo J. Blitzkrieg now runs a rubber plantation just outside Kuala Lampor.

I wish I could go fishing today.

Granted, you can go fishing todat....around the waste disposal sites.

I wish Archer fish needed arrows.

Granted, but they learn to use the arrows and launch an attack on your home.

I wish that the Way of the Master would go offline.

Granted but all the people who were interested in it visit subsim, see that it was you who wished Way of the Master offline and then hunt you down, set fire to your house and throw rocks at you.

I wish I knew what Way of the Master was.

edit : Just looked up Way of the Master.

I wish I hadn't looked up Way of the Master.

Granted, but instead you JOINED the Way of the Master!

I wish I have unlimited amount of RAM in my PC.

Granted, but due to a minor typographical error you end up with an unlimited amount of RUM in your PC which wrecks the rest of your computer and causes you to drink yourself to death.

I wish I could teleport anywhere, any time.

Granted, however you have teleported into a BDSM dungeon at the exact moment the dominatrix shoved a red hot poker into your mouth as a punishment for making frivolous wishes.

I wish I knew what was around the corner.

Granted, it's the guy thats after you with a CornerShot

I wish I didn't suck so much at landing aircraft

Granted, you can no longer fly aircraft at all.

I wsh I were a moderator so I could close this thread and get the last word. And not have my dream crushed!

Granted, but by doing so you have made it so wishes stop being crushed, and have thus destroyed SubSim, the Internet and the Universe

I wish I knew what I was doing

Granted, you were just finished playing Russian Roulette and you lost!

I wish it is illegal to crush others dreams...

Granted, so now you serve a lengthy sentence behind bars.

I wish strawberries tasted like rasspberries.

Granted, but caused raspberries to taste like the next item in the World_GeneralItems.cfg file (And everything else before it, inc. Strawberries), Dart Boards!

I wish I knew what Dart Boards taste like

D'oh, too late
Granted, but now raspberries taste like onions.

Granted, but during the taste test and far too late, you discover that you neglected to remove the darts before chowing down.

I wish some people weren't so anxious to shut this thread down.

Granted, but now they're anxious to shut this forum down.

I wish I could travel the world.