The problem with most relationships is communication. Too much communication.

Homer Simpson.

Where do murderers go? Who's to doom when the judge himself is taken before the bar?

Captain Ahab

Do whatever floats your boat as long as it doesn't sink mine.

"Government: If you refuse to pay unjust taxes, your property will be confiscated. If you attempt to defend your property, you will be arrested. If you resist arrest, you will be clubbed. If you defend yourself against clubbing, you will be shot dead. These procedures are known as the Rule of Law.”
― Edward Abbey

Our Sovereign Lord the King chargeth and commandeth all persons, being assembled, immediately to disperse themselves, and peaceably to depart to their habitations, or to their lawful business, upon the pains contained in the act made in the first year of King George, for preventing tumults and riotous assemblies. God Save the King!

The Riot Act

(repealed 18 July 1973)

The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.

Alfred Hitchcock

Good one!

That's what I said when I saw The Fellowship of the Ring: "I have one word for Mr. Jackson - 'intermission'!"

Hell is empty and all the devils are here.

William Shakespeare

Tell Your Ma, Tell Your Pa
Our Love’s A-gonna Grow Ooh-wah, Ooh-wah”

Rock-a-day Johnny

Believe you can and you're halfway there.

Theodore Roosevelt

If it feels good do it, if it feels bad do it again.

The aim of art is to represent not the outward appearance of things, but their inward significance.

Aristotle

“There is nothing which I dread so much as a division of the republic into two great parties, each arranged under its leader, and concerting measures in opposition to each other. This, in my humble apprehension, is to be dreaded as the greatest political evil under our Constitution.”
― John Adams, letter to Jonathan Jackson, October 2, 1780

Intellectuals solve problems, geniuses prevent them.

Albert Einstein

“The best way to take control over a people and control them utterly is to take a little of their freedom at a time, to erode rights by a thousand tiny and almost imperceptible reductions. In this way, the people will not see those rights and freedoms being removed until past the point at which these changes cannot be reversed.”
― Adolf Hitler, Mein Kampf

If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude.

Maya Angelou

"If you shake it more than three times you're playing with it."
-unknown

Women are like teabags. We don't know our true strength until we are in hot water!

Eleanor Roosevelt

Women are like fine wines

They need to be kept restrained on a rack in an underground special room. :D

"See, when the government spends money, it creates jobs; whereas when the money is left in the hands of the taxpayers, God only knows what they do with it. Bake it into pies, probably. Anything to avoid creating jobs."
― Dave Barry