Artillery is the god of war.
-Uncle Joe Stalin

A little boy in a 1960's television commercial standing in front of the open refrigerator with an empty jar in his hands.

"Who got my pickle"?

OMG I forgot about that commercial LoL

"its ok to window shop just as long as your not purchasing" a mate of mine when he was eyeing up some school girls.

A man is only as old as he looks... and I can still look :up:

Winters: Flash!
Hall: sh**!
Winters: I don't think that's the correct reply, trooper. I say "flash, you say "thunder".
Hall: Yes, sir. Thunder, sir.

Guess from were it is.

here's another one

Lt. George Rice (10th Armour): Panzer division is about to cut the road south. Looks like you guys are going to be surrounded.
Winters: We're paratroopers, Lieutenant. We're supposed to be surrounded.

Admiral Benson: I slipped on a crab. Who put that crab there?
Lt. Commander Block: I don't see any crab, sir.
Admiral Benson: Don't tell me. There were two crabs. They work in pairs. I went to Annapolis for chrissakes!

PD

Here's another good one

Sink: "Kids, I just had a conversation with General LeClerc. He told me he was first into Paris, and by God, he wanted to be first into Berchtesgaden. I told him I understood his point. Now you fire up Second Battalion and out-flank that French son of a bitch!."

From Bill Mauldin, creator of Willie and Joe and Editorial caroonist for the Chicago Tribune for years:

The quickest way to become a pacifist is to join the infantry.

http://img245.imageshack.us/img245/865/maul49rz9.jpg


My favorite Up Front cartoon. The caption reads:

Bill Mauldin :up:

RIP

Wille and Joe will live and fight forever

"Strangers have the best candy"

"Paranoia - You only have to be right once to make it all worthwhile" - unknown

"Morality is the best of all devices for leading mankind by the nose" - Nietzsche

"When a man cease to believe in god, he does not believe in nothing. He believes in everything" - G.K Chesterton

"We're all hostages from hell, and all we can do is cry for mercy." - Marshall Efron

A few from me:
"Democracy is 3 wolves and a sheep, voting about what to eat for lunch" - Unknown

"I don't have ONE white key on my piano - my elephant smoked too much" - Victor Borge

"Politics is no bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards. If you fail, you can always write a book" - Ronald Reagan

"Its no great accomplishment to walk into a bar - the accomplishment it to walk from it" - Monrad & Rislund

"To read quotationbooks is a good occupation for uneducated people" - Churchill ;)

"Most people will chase pleasure so much, that they will chase past it" - Kierkegaard

"He thinks too much; that kind of people are dangerous" Shakespeare

A lecturer in the Highlands of Scotland was boasting of his ancestry. "I was born an Englishman, I lived as an Englishman and I hope to die as an Englishman."

"Ach," said a voice from the back of the hall. "Have ye nae ambition at all?"

(anonymous)

"Posterity! You will never know how much it cost the present generation to preserve your freedom! I hope you make good use of it. If you do not, I shall repent in heaven that ever I took half the pains to preserve it."

(John Adam) True today as it was then - if not more so.

"That awful power, the public opinion of this nation, is formed and molded by a horde of ignorant self-complacent simpletons who failed at ditching and shoemaking and fetched up in journalism on their way to the poorhouse."

(Samuel Clemens 1873) I love this one.

"I recently had to speak before a committee of inquiry. I was asked 'Name, date of birth, profession?'
I answered: "Greatest foreign minister of all time." It was embarrassing for me, but I was under oath."

(Hans-Dietrich Genscher, German foreign minister)

King Harald 1066 by any chance?