There's life without Facebook and Internet? Really? Send me the link.

People who send me a text message which only says "call me" will get a phone call where I say "message me" then hang up.

Hanging up in anger just don't work right with cell phones!
I'm working on an App that sends the sound of a phone being slammed down when I hang up on people.

For the best seat in the house, you'll have to move the dog.

Give a man a fish and he will have food for one day. Teach him to catch fish and he will spend all day at the lake drinking beer.

Living on earth may be tough, but it includes a free ride around the sun every year.

....and fast it goes 67,000 miles per hour, while earth is rotating with roughly 1,000 miles per hour.

Markus

"Humankind".
Wedding ceremonies are rituals that allow two individuals of this species to announce to other individuals of their species that they now belong to each other.
Weddings would be more honest if both peed on each other to establish their territory. "Keep out everybody, this is now my property."

The decision to decide is a decision in itself.

Reminds me of ...

Don't drink to forget me, you'll end up seeing me double.

People who think that Mrna vaccines can change their DNA, should see this as a chance.

I never apologize. I’m sorry, but that’s just the way I am..

The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television.

Some minds are like concrete, thoroughly mixed and permanently set.