No I bloody well don't, tweeting gits going off at 4am in the morning.

Do ear plugs work?

I don't know. I don't use them.

What will you have for lunch/dinner/breakfast?

Breakfast: A bacon and egg butty.

Lunch: A cheese and onion toasty.

Dinner: Whatever I can snaffle at/from work.




Do you ever wish for a little bit more?

Depends on what you are thinking of wen referring to 'more'.
More working hours? Then the answer is no.
More holidays? Then the answer is yes.

What is the next question?

The one below this line of text.


If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

Because there's love and there's "love", and lingerie only counts toward one.

Why can there only be one?

Because two is too many.

Why on earth did they build Windsor Castle on the flight path of Heathrow?

To impress all tourists (who didn't come by boat).

Why is there water in the sea?

Fish could hardly live in sand.

Is this where Sharon and Ozzie actually live?

I don't know about Sharon, but Ozzie does so.

I saw a documentary about Hawkwind recently.
Do you know them?

I actually manage them.

Beat that.

Nah, you wouldn't be so proud about managing them if you actually new them.

How about that :know:

How about who?

Is Wales closed during the winter?

Should be. Not really, as with all the usual places Wales is a fantastic place, like France, like Slovenia, like South Shields. It's the people that let it down.*

How many people have I offended?






*sorry Sammi79, just kidding.

Not nearly enough. Be more aggressive!

Will Jim give me grief for that?