What the hell did I do to get pun...uh, promoted to Safety Officer Gold Class! :stare:

http://www.spirithalloween.com/image...eractive.a.jpg

Look at this! I'm not sure if this is bilge or tonight's stew. :o
http://www.bushfarms.com/images/DoubleBucket2.jpg

Whatever it is I think I will go to town to eat.

always thought they were one in the same...

Notice:

The following members have yet completed their qualification for swimming.
Meet the minimum obligated service as of the class ... Swim continuously, 500 yds utilizing sidestroke and/or breaststroke within 14 minutes.

Fire
Aktung
Budda
Kapt Inass.
Wolferz {the shame of it}

To improve morals/morale.. I'm not sure which it was, I just took it down.
We'll be having a basket weaving class on Tuesday nights in the galley.

The crew is encouraged to turn in their porn to Tango during confession. Tango feels this is a needed step, rather than just confessing it.

Per Wolferz, condoms will no longer be provided to the crew, he feels it only encourages bad behavior.

We will be adding fresh fruit once a week to our diet.

This is a good idea. I feel I really need to experience what the crew are confessing first-hand, so I can fully appreciate what they are going through. Also, I need something to decorate the confession booth, Battleship Grey is such a drab colour.

So we're hard at work qualifying for the swimming requirement. I think I just made in under the bell.
http://i225.photobucket.com/albums/d...cb151a3add.jpg

First, the fresh fruit ordered by Wolferz has arrived ..

http://i319.photobucket.com/albums/m...09/Bananas.jpg

Not sure this would be my first pick:o, but please don't leave your peels laying on the deck.

Swimming qualifications didn't go so well. The best time was by Aktung, who swam 24 yards in 1 hour 15 minutes. However, his time was disqualified due to improper swimming devices being used. Good try Aktung, but you got caught...please leave your ...er..floatation device below deck..

http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e333/cd2323/1234.jpg



Budda got the next best time, 10 yards in 3 hours 5 minutes....Until further notice those listed are not to go topside..

I like breast stroking. Can I bring my Mrs. Fireftr to help me with that? :O:

well, you and Wolferz breast stroking on deck sure didn't count this time. C'mon, you two need to be setting an example for the men....

I'll work on it. As long as I can pass Wolferz and Fire and leave them for the sharks, I'm satisfied. Don't have to be the fastest, just faster than the slowest.

I'll get them floaties next time I go out.

http://i1045.photobucket.com/albums/...psac4e3040.jpghttp://i1045.photobucket.com/albums/...ps32105f2c.jpg
:har:

A couple of items:

1) Wernher, meet me in the Confession Booth (conning tower), I feel we have some serious confessing to do.

(Armistead, is the Confession-cam still going?)

2) I think it may be a good idea, to boost morale, to from a bilge-band. We'll need volunteers and anything that can be used as instruments. We may even be able to put on a concert in a few months.

Wern is just jealous that in his absence I was promoted to XO. I believe Wern is a baptist and I doubt you'll get him in the booth, nor will he bow to Wolferz and kiss his ring.

I think the fresh fruit has improved morale and the rats seem to be taking more pride in themselves. I even saw Swamp washing his body. I do like the idea of a bilge band, with practice we can do a Christmas concert for Subsim. It may get us more members... I might even do another one of my famous Christmas productions...

Also, I authorize you to get us a tree and some stockings for the men...

What size stockings do the men wear?