The 7 dwarfs are all excited as the new pope is visiting fairy story land.
All week they nudge Dopey s******ing "Well you can finally ask your question!", to which Dopey replies every time "Shurrup willya!"
Finally the day arrives and all the dwarfs are lined up with the other characters from the Snow White story, he shakes hands with the evil Queen, then Snow White then slowly makes his way down the line of the dwarfs.
As he approaches Dopey theres a small chant which gets louder and louder "Ask him.ask him...ask him ASK HIM>!"
"Ask me what?" Questions the pope.
The dwarfs shove Dopey forward "ASK HIM!",
"What would you like to know?", says his holiness.
"Well", begins Dopey, "Are any of your nuns black?"
"Hm" ponders the pope "As a religion we catholics don't differentiate between creed so its more than probable that quite a few of our nuns are black . Does that answer your question?"
ASK HIM!! shout the dwarfs.
"Is there more to your question young man?"
"Erm......do any of your nuns work in Antarctica?"
"well young man we have nuns all around the globe so its more than likely that we have a couple in Antarctica. Does that answer your question?"
ASK HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yell the dwarfs!
"Is there more to this question?" asks the pope now getting more than annoyed.
"Erm..................................are any of these black nuns in Antarctica dwarfs?!
"WHAT"! Splutters the pope.
"I'm sure if we had a black dwarf nun in Antarctica i would have heard of it. So in answer to your question NO!"
All the dwarfs collapse on the floor pissing themselves laughing.
"DOPEY SHAGGED A PENGUIN!! DOPEY SHAGGED A PENGUIN!!"

Once there was this really scummy bloke travelling on a bus, when a nun got on and sat right in front of him. She was quite good looking, so he leaned over to her and said, "I really want to fu*k you in the arse!" She went bright red, and got off at the next stop.

When the bloke was getting off the bus the driver said, "Hey mate, I noticed the nun got off a couple of stops early, what did you say to her?"

The bloke replied, "Oh, I just told her I wanted to fu*k her in the arse."

The driver thought for a minute, then said "Well, if you're still interested, I happen to know she walks through the park down the road there every night at about 6 o'clock." The bloke thanked the driver for the info then went on his way.

When he got home, he thought to himself "She'll never fu*k a scumbag like me." So he got dressed up as Jesus.

That evening he was hiding in the bushes when the nun came wandering through the park. He leapt out and cried, "Gday. I'm Jesus, and I want to fu*k you in the arse!"

The nun replied, "Well, seeing as how you're Jesus, I suppose you'd better."
So the bloke got his cock out, and proceeded to fu*k the nun up the arse. But after he'd finished, he was feeling a bit guilty. So he said, "Actually love, I'm not really Jesus, I'm that rude bloke off the bus earlier."

And the nun replied, "That's OK, cause I'm not the nun, I'm the bus driver!"

Hahaaha, I actually lol'd on that one Jim.:lol: :nope:

It's not all bad news if Sharia Law is adopted in Britain.

Ok so you can't go out boozing or gambling but,

At least you can still get stoned.

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Two tourists driving through Wales. At Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysilio gogogoch they stop for lunch and one tourist asks the waitress,
"Before we order, can you settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are..... very slowly."
The Blonde waitress leaned over and said "Burrr-gurrrr-kiiing."

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A man was complaining to a friend, "I had it all - money, a magnificent house, a fast car, the love of a beautiful woman... then, poof! It was all gone!" "What happened?" asked the friend. "My wife found out..."