Granted, he is righteously aquitted of the crime against humanity and you are found guilty of making absolutley no sense at all and hung by the neck until dead by a mob of bewildered villagers.


I wish I better understood Raptor1


.

Granted, but only because you have both entered into a civil ceremony.

I wish the man in the moon was made of cheese.

He is...aged limberger and you are now tied to his hip.

I wish my wife would stop talking on the phone.

Granted, she stops talking on the phone and talks to you about cleaning the garage, cutting the lawn, etc. etc. etc. For a very loooooooooong time.

I wish I had an easy method of getting posts from one place to another

You do...go out and use a post hole digger to dig another hole, pull up the post, and drag it over to the new hole where you set it. Don't forget to fill the first hold in though once you are done...

I wish I were a guardian...and a seer...and a hellhound all rolled up into one...

Granted, you are now able to predict when you are going to kill yourself as you attempt to protect yourself from the inevitable.

I wish my fish weren't battered.

Granted, your fish is now served up on a plate still gasping for air, bon apetit.


I wish I was off to see the The Wonderful Wizard of Oz.

Granted, you're off to see The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, which means that you are either Dorothy, The Tin Man, The Cowardly Lion, The Scarecrow or Toto, take your pick

I wish the Wizard was the Whizzer instead

Granted, he is Michael Whizzer and he sooooo likes you.

I wish teleporting was indicative.

Granted, your most recent teleport indicates that you should have turned left at Albuquerque

I just want to wish you well

You do, and 60 years later they find JB at the bottom of one when Oberon decides to look down it. Of course, he does not survive, therefore rewriting SUBSIM history and causing the werewolves to win.

I wish for more vacation time.

Granted, but your car and home are repo'd because you're a lazy near-do-well.

I wish I had more money than I deserve.



.

Granted, you have more money than you deserve, exactly $1 more, which means you have $1.50 (almost enough to buy a cup of coffee:))

I wish for existential existence in the great unknown and a reuben sandwich

Granted, your existence in the great unknown becomes extinction as you choke on the last mouthful of your rueben.

I wish the letter 'w' had a different name

Granted, from now on your known as a anker.

I wish my foibles were artistic.