Like Penguin said a sport hobby or martial arts study in the long run would be beneficial to both the body and the mind. It would help with discipline too which in turn helps you to focus and calm the state of mind, making you stronger outside and inside.

This life is a mind game actually don't let anyone or anything play with or dictate yours. Be the master of the game, all you need to have is the will, willingness to create the initiative, courage and a good sense of humor to even laugh at your own situation or yourself when necessary. Don't live in fear of anything or of failure, after all we will ALL successfully die in the end. All of us from ones deemed most successful to the most unfortunate people imaginable. Being thought highly by mankind would be as meaningless as being thought lowly to the dead. It's between the creator and the dead in the end and nothing comes in between or remain hidden to the creator.

Yes, martial arts study is a good point to start from. As I am an older guy, I have been studying T'ai Chi Chuan for about 15 years now.

It is a lot about "meditation in motion". So you are thinking about nothing else but the next move. After a while of practice, you can easily switch your mind to that state under any condition.

It is more or less practical in any trainees health condition. It depends on your master whether you learn martial arts or the other aspects more intensive.

My meditation is when I jog. I think of nothing else while I jog. For some people it could be dancing. Whatever activity that you enjoy that makes you to forget everything else but the activity and quiet down your mind to be aware of the 'now' is meditation.

You're very young only 19. All 19 years old should start their world conquest planning! :03: Time is theirs and thus the whole world!

Tai Chi, it is said.

I know it a bit, but from a psycho-practical point of view for Western trainees embedded in the usual Western lifestyle, may I offer an alternative.

That is Kum Nye. Deriivng from the Tibetan tradition and adapted to especially the Western cultural context and lifestyle by Tartang Tulku (a Lama/Rinpoche living in the US and teaching at universities, colleges, as well as cooperating with business and sciences), it avoids the ballet-like choreographies that can trick the newcomer to Tai Chi into just repeating robotic sequences and thinking that this is what it ius about: copying. Tai Chi can lead terribly wrong if you do not have a real good teacher. I do not devalue it if you have a good teacher, but good techers are rare - very rare, for this and mediation in general, believe me, there are plenty of pseudo-gurus instead.

The Kum Nye form developed by Tartang Tulku, is working without siuch seqeunces, but with quite ordinary movements - but these done in super slow motion: raise the arm and let it sink - and take 5 minutes for it. Enormous muscle stress and periods of deep muscle relief go in sequence, it reminds a bit of principles from Wilhelm Reich and Alexander Lowen (body-focussed psychoanalysis). I have worked with Kum Nye and Zazen in sequence when giving meditation courses, and saw it being embraced by people easily.

However, the method is almost unknown, and thus it may hard to find a course, though it should be easier in America than in europe, since Tartang Tulku is better known there. But it is as effective, but much easier to learn. Some of it's many exercises equal heavy sports, in their physical demand.

To learn more about what it is and what it does, why not try a book for information. In German, there is only one available (last time I checked), but if you enter "Kum Nye" at American Amazon, you find several entries, for example:

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_no...um+nye&x=0&y=0

From a teacher'S point of view, I am a great fan of combining Shamata and Vipassyana (relaxed awareness and focussed concentration) meditation, as well as combining mental and body-focussed meditations.

Skybird,

that was an important point you mentioned about teacher. I was lucky to have a female master at the age of 75 who was still learning after 35 years of practise, as she said.

I have done some writing about traditional T'ai Chi Chuan and its situation in the western world a couple of years ago.

May I point out that it is essential to have a good teacher whenever the musculoskeletal system is heavily involved. Otherwise more damage than anything else can be done.

I think we should not go too far into details but give him some ideas from which he can possibly choose from, or find anything else that suits him. After all, we are all individuals having individual needs.

@ Skybird: Maybe you are interested in reading this: edited out for not working(German language)

Zen mind: beginner'S mind, always. ;)

That is true for any form of meditation as well. There is a need for competent teachers and teachings, the possibilities to go wrong or get stuck are endless.

But good teachers are very, very rare. That people from my own old branch, psychology, claim to do the same with their psychological techniques, while obviously not knowing what they are talking about whan comparing that with true meditation, is not really helpful and does not make things any better.

Cannot say if he is on a real quest for freedom. But people on a spiritual search often said that they did not find their master or teachers themselves, but got found once they were ready to get found.

Your link sends me into an endless loop of advertisement being ripplefired at me. Clicking download leads to a blanks creen, and then the bombardement begins.

Sorry for causing trouble, that is my mediafire - account with a .pdf on it. Never heard about trouble so far. Well, you disabled PM. I try to put it elsewhere...

Sorry again.

Edit: Far to large to put it into a separate post, no web space offered by provider. I guess it has to do with browser and / or other software.

At the end it is not worth to create another account elsewhere.

www.mediafire.com/danasan

No he doesn't need therapy at this point from what I have read (as I said in my previous post), unless these memories are causing serious distress or quality of life issues, which then would require therapy, not drugs. Also like I said I don't think he is a candidate for clinical depression, or he wouldn't be posting here telling us about his problems. My point was more that issues like this are better treated by therapy (like CBT) rather than psychopharmaceuticals.

Don't worry, it is not the first time mediafire gives me trouble. Maybe their advertising scheme is unusually aggressive, and that does not go well with my system which I have tailored to be unusually supressive and tight in security settings.

If psychologist and general doctors stopped issuing out anti depressant pills to patients who come to them with a sad story we would have less depressed people in the world. Okay if your suffering from bipolar or maniac depression and bordering on suicide some form of medication is needed to keep you under control but doctors are too quick to hand out to patients anti depressants for any reason. Your not feeling happy can't sleep, anxiety attack whatever and your be handed a subscription for Prozac where your end up feeling like a lump of concrete for the next 6 months.

I read of a study in the UK they did over 3 months with patients that were long term depression sufferers some taking medication for 5yrs or more. They were all put on this new anti depression pill over the period taking one pill in the morning and one in the evening everyday 7 days a week. At the end of the 3 month trial all the patients agreed with the new pill some even claiming they no longer feeling depressed. They all wanted to be put on this medication.

The pill was sugar. There was no new anti depressant pill. That sugar pill cured some. Its just all in the mind.

They could of been given chocolate covered M&Ms but told this is the new anti depressant pill we're testing and the outcome would of still been the same. These people may have suffered from depression n the short term but they were so dependent on the drug that they believe without taking it they would not be able to function like a normal person. It was all in their heads. There is a well known piano teacher who lives up our street and has been on anti depressants for 22yrs, who according to her sister there is nothing wrong with her but she believes if she doesn't take this pill she will fall deeper into that hole she created in her mind.

The best fix for depression or anxiety is to head down to your gym and lift weights or do some form of cardio exercise for a few hours each day. Or if exercise is not your thing just keep busy. IMO.

@ OP sorry for going a bit of topic. I wish you well like some have said here try and keep busy, go down to the gym and do a workout get that adrenaline rush its good for the mind body and soul. All the best.

As a student of the martial arts, I can agree that it is a wonderful exercise for mind and body. However, it is not an elixir for all of life's problems, nor will it magically give you inner peace. If you are thinking of taking it up, it is a very good thing to do and is very rewarding so long as you do not expect it to miraculously wash away your personal demons. That will not happen.

Very true.

Some people take to the martial arts for the "wrong" reasons, i.e., to compensate for insecurities elsewhere in their lives in a way that is not helpful in that regard or in their pursuit of martial arts training. While it can help with focus, confidence, and general positive outlook, I have found that those benefits are a natural "bonus" that comes from pursuing the training for its own sake. I didn't start out intending to become a happier person - that sort of just happened over time.

And when making the decision to start, I can only echo what some others here have hinted at: the most important thing is not choosing a "style," but choosing a teacher. If you have a good student/teacher relationship, you will benefit from it even if you decide later on that the style is not for you. You may choose to go study something else, but the time already spent will not have been wasted because your learning experience will have been a positive one and you will have a good understanding of that style upon which to base any decision to switch.

I had no clue what style of martial arts I was getting into, I chose to go where I go because of the positive interaction I had both with my sensei and some of his other senior students when I first walked in the place. And it didn't take long to realize that his dojo was, for me, a good place to be. No matter how I felt when I walked in the door, I felt better when I walked out. That still holds true and is one of the main reasons I'm still there.

From my experience it helped. Physically well being means a clear mind also. Prozac just clogs up the mind makes it all cloudy you don't think you just sit and ponder about nothing really your a lump of concrete which in their reasoning this is suppose to calm you? And fix that so called chemical imbalance in your brain that has triggered depression?!?. Problem is people become addicted to this lump of concrete reaction. I know I did. I had a bad car accident in early 2000 where I became depressed not long after, the doctors told me this is normal and put me on aropax a lighter form of anti depressant but that made me constipated :damn: & my smoking and drinking coffee tripled. Didn't do any good for me. So prozac was next - welcome to the lump of concrete lifestyle, doing nothing, thinking about nothing & being very talkative. Just a legal high.

I'll never forget the time where I was in town at the post office filling out a form where staff member at the teller asked me my name and I couldn't remember my name, I went um.... stared at her which only made her feel a little embarrassed or paranoid then I had to open my wallet and look at my ID card to tell her my name! :rotfl2:I see the funny side of it now but back then it wasn't funny. I was so angry and embaressed it didn't help that the room was full of customers either that I went home got all the prozac and flushed them down the toilet. Went straight to bed cause I was so depressed and tired from what just happened :DL that I slept for two days straight. I then went back into town and sign up with the gym for 12months and the rest is history.


Here's also what helped me apart from the rigorous weight training I put myself through was positive thinking. The physical to get the body in good heath and the positive thinking to help the mind. Go hand in hand.


Think Positive - (you ain't going to be positive on anti depressants)

Never doubt or put yourself down - ( you will doubt and put yourself down on anti depressants)

Make a goal in your life and try and reach that goal start off small goals that take a day or a week to complete & reward yourself when you have reached your goal then move on to another goal. If you fail at reaching your goal don't blame yourself were all human and make mistakes try again.

Ignore what others think of you, stay away from people who are always talking about doom and gloom or just plain negative - downers. Hang out with friends even if it means making new friends and dumping the old, who are positive thinking.

Believe in yourself .

Work towards losing the resentment and guilt if any.

Positive thinking and exercise are a great cure for any illness of the mind.

Exactly.

I find it useful to differ between to kinds of "martial arts".

The one is either focussed on the purpose of practical self-defence (for example women in police-run courses), or is focussed on sports, like boxing or fencing is, or is focussed on championships and tournaments. Often, it is a combination of all these factors.

The other is when the practice of a technique is accompanied by an inner change, a certain attitude one is taking on life, and the world, and the surprises it brings. This is not about winning trophies at championships, but this is Bushido, this is a way of life, an inner attitude of how to meet life and death. And that this may point at very different directions you can already see in that the word "samurai" means "servant". Originally, "samurai" was not limited to serving the landlord exclusively , but the community and it's weak. It reminds quite a lot of the rules and ideals of the feudal elites of European knighthood, as it were meant originally: to protect and to serve, to help the weak and to defend the helpless.

It is fine to do the first way, there is nothing to say against it. But one needs to see that it is very different from what the second is about. And usually, the second is not what you get taught in sports schools and self defence courses. There might be exceptions from the rule - but as I said, good teachers on these things are very rare. In case of the first understanbding, you focus on yourself, on your interest, on your ego. In case of the latter, you learn to go beyond your ego, to serve others, the focus is not on your interest , but on the need of the other. That is quite a difference. Trophies are for sport athletes. Bushido is for warriors.

What I absolutely cannot stand is that kind of books that try to combine martial arts principles or "golden Samurai rules" with business practices to overcome and destroy the competition and become dominant within a market segement. According books I remember to have been quite popular in the early and mid-90s. To me, this always was kind of an abuse, the tempting, persuading path to the dark side of the force. :) Bushido is not for conquering the world. Bushido is for mastering oneself and serving the communal good.

Or to remind of an old famous Zen story: you can become a swoird master - without ever having touched a sword or knowing how to swing it. The art of the sword is something that lies beyond the blade.