Granted, instead, a car in front of your house has its horn stuck... all night long....

I wish for a telescope.

Granted, you now get the Hubble space telescope, it will land on your house in 3...2..1...

I wish Task Force has insurance

Granted, but the insurance doesn't cover falling objects from space...........

I wish I had a bigger boat

Granted, but you can only operate it on the river Lethe.


I wish I had another cup of coffee

Granted, you have another cup of coffee, but it's the stuff that Jack Nicholson liked to drink in "The Bucket List" (coffee beans eaten by tree cats, pooped and poop dried into coffee grounds)

I wish I could recite pi to 87 decimal places

Granted, but I can recite it to 88.

I wish someone would pay my credit card bill for me next month.

Granted, but now you have to pay his credit card bills for the rest of his life.

I wish I wouldn't be that tired all day.:-?

Granted, you are tired all night.

I wish I would meet Stewie Griffin some day.

Granted, but you are trapped in an episode of "Family Guy" forever, with no way to return to the real world. You go mad one day and scalp the entire cast.

I wish that I had been allowed to go on the trip to Tijuana back when I was in Middle School.

Granted.

You went to Tijuana


I wish that Santa gave me a better gift

Granted, he takes away your gift, he told me that you are ungrateful.

I wish macs would get the blue screen of death, and stuff like that, just like PCs.

Granted, macs get the blue screen of death, and stuff like that, just like PCs, but now PCs get the invisible screen of death immediately followed by emissions of extremely large quantities of methane

I wish Task Force had a gas mask

granted, but I do and you dont, and you get one.

I wish macs and PCs were equal.

Granted, Steve Jobs and Bill Gates now own your family, your cat, and Belgium


I wish that house cats went extinct

Granted, but the rodent population spikes upwards and plague is spread on every continent except for Antarctica.

I wish that people had common sense.