I gave myself authority to assign because no one else was doing it.
You have a point about her not paying attention to me. Why should she be different than any other female.
Just because she runs the kitchen, doesn't mean she can't be in the torpedo room too. After all, she is good.

You have no authority to give yourself authority. All positions given to the crew are determined by the officers and sent to Wolferz for approval, which he never gives, so people generally do what they want. If you've seen Donna loading the aft tube and really think she's good at it, then I guess it's OK. It's not like Wolferz will ever leave port anyway...Heck, we don't even have torps aft yet and only one forward due to both rooms being used to store Wolferz's wardrobe.

This thread is just so wrong!
I can't figure out why none of you work for us yet.
:o

we chosen not to work at all, that's why we joined the navy, we're living off the govt....

doesn't mean some of us don't want change, but we're only good as those that lead us and right now our leader is passed out on the head....or throne as he calls it....:o

Passed out, you amatuer! That's deep in advanced thinking technique. I mean everyone knows that!

Huh? Wha?

Whoozzat?
>hic< zzz

And so the Mighty Leader speaketh, but no-one took the blindest bit of notice and carried on as usual. I'm going to have a reversible sign made up for Wolferz' throne room. On one side it'll say 'Occupied by the Captain', and on the other it'll say 'Back in 5 minutes'.

I've seen his plans, he plans to sail us all to Wewak to live amongst the natives, installing himself as king.

Then there's me, overlooked for leadership. I have a plan to make us men again, charts, graphs, advanced social training and vigorous exercise. With me, you have a chance to actually fight the enemy and die proudly for your country. Don't any of you want to be heroes?

WHO"S WITH ME?

You're confused again. As usual.

The object is to make the other guys die for their country.
If you allow yourself to be killed, I'll have no choice but to bring you up on charges of DESTRUCTION OF GOVERNMENT PROPERTY. :roll:

Not likely we're gonna die here in port. Can't we just take a spin around the bay and see what our one working engine can do? Can I steer just once?

They don't call him Boom-boom fer nuthin!
 

NOPE! you are the indispensable man! IE: the forward torpedo crew of our bilgerat pigboat!(It's literally a one man job!) Job description as follows: LT Armistead to personally detonate the SPAR torpedo: a series of lines that operates the spar torpedo that must be carefully pulled in sequence, in the dark, and possibly under fire. As with the immortal LT Cushing.... you coolly execute the task, a bullet(s) may "tear at his collar, and two more ripped through his clothing." the 16-foot-long iron pole that served as the sub’s weapon delivery system,... Not a release mechanism:k_confused: but rather the copper sleeve of the torpedo itself. This means the torpedo (120 lbs black powder??!!:huh:) exploded at the end of the spar, a discovery of critical importance. http://www.hunley.org/final_images/content/spar.jpg Due to the obvious expendability of your position,:Kaleun_Salute::wah: (see diagram below) You are prematurely issued The Southern Cross of Honourhttp://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...28front%29.png to maintain the remnants of your morale and the customary letter to yer next of kin has been prepared. Naturally your access to the medicinal bilge brew shall remain unhampered. We of the cranky crew will remain with the aft torpedo room shemales -as far back from the blast as possible-maintaining the remnants of our own (steel-balled) morale!:rock::Kaleun_Cheers: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...c/Hunley-1.jpghttp://www.hunley.org/final_images/content/HS_0069.jpg:subsim:

What am I going to blow up? For us to do this, Wolferz must infiltrate some enemy port and he's still in the head even though he ran out of toilet paper a week ago.

Can you color code or number the lines so I don't forget the right order. Sometimes I get really stressed under stress:hmmm:, yea, I can say that.

I would also like one last visit in the aft.

And you get hoisted by your own petard.:huh:

Nobody wants to visit that swamp you call your aft. Not in it, near it or on it.
EVER! We'll just take you at your word about the "PU" tattoo on your bumper.

Did you have the "P" inked on the port cheek and the "U" inked on the starboard? That should really confuse the hookers. They won't know which end is "UP":haha:

A crankn n' a grindn' n' a churnin'
 

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...c/Hunley-1.jpg
^Seating Arrangements: in order of Expendability bow to stern...no changes allowed! Armistead;Kapit.Endraß;Wolfertz;Tango;FireFtr8;Swa mprat;Aktung;Donna-alway polite to ladies! PS: ARMIBBY whose aft did you have in mind?:O: The color code is 1. Red/ 2. White/ and 3. Blew...sky high!:woot:I kept it reeeal simple.

So I sink my spar into the enemy while pulling with you guys aft of me?

When I start pulling, do I just jerk once or over and over until the explosion?

What if something goes wrong, do we have a plan B?

Maybe someone else should do it, I'll just make a big mess of it...

I think you can do your own pulling.

Only truck drivers have intimate knowledge of pulling things.:O:

Forget the complicated lanyard system. We'll give Armistead a Bic to light the fuse on the charge.:D

On second thought, we better make that a box of strike anywhere kitchen matches.
Try not to ignite those bubbles coming from your aft.

maybe we should give it a dry run first...

That might hurt.