Granted, you can make proper sentences but still no1 gives a f*ck what you write.

I wish Raptor1's sig was narrower

Granted, but only in the broadest sense of the word.

I wish the timing was right.

The timing is right, but since it was supposed to be left, the entire thing is now off balance and creates a blue hole that swallows the Large Hardon Collider

I wish I could remember who, who, who wrote the book of love

Granted, you remember that it was the Maquis de Sade

I wish I had a crab salad

Granted, you had it, and now you finished it, therefore becoming crab salad-less once more

I wish south was north without somehow making north south

Granted, south is north provided you are standing in the wrong spot at the right time.

I wish I weren't so confused.

Granted, what were you saying again?

I wish we could have a baby:hmm:
http://www.anyfun.net/animation/gifs/adultgif2.gif

Granted, but it turns out to be a baby elephant that resists all attempts at house breaking except when it is actually breaking your house. The food bills alone drive you into poverty and the dogs now hate your guts...

I wish for a large frosted mug filled with my favorite lager.

Granted, but since you were in the head at the time, Steed snuck out of the crawlspaces and drank it, leaving you with an empty frosted mug and lager leftover in the glass.

I wish I weren't so tired this morning.

Granted, you went to sleep yesterday and completely flopped whatever it is you were trying to achieve

I wish I had a lead balloon

Granted, you have a lead balloon, but you are at 20,000 feet in the basket of your lead balloon and, well, you know

I wish I could quit sneezing and wheezing

Granted, you quit sneezing, wheezing and breathing altogether. Your demise is unfortunate. Still, never mind.

I wish I was at the Subsim meet instead of work.

Granted, but they put you to work, and keep you working the entire time.;)

I wish for my P.E. teacher to dissapear and never bother me again.:D

Granted, your p.e teacher disapears and you don't take exercises-you become fatter and fatter, no girl likes you and you end up as a zoo attraction.

I wish I hadn't been totally drunk today between my university classes and hadn't destroyed my friend's chair.

Granted, you didn't - your evil twin did.

I wish . . . . . . . .