I thought I'd try and do better.....

Ran into an unescorted King George V and Three-stacker Heavy Cruiser, first patrol with a brand new IXb,

hit it with one eel, thought meh, that won't sink and went to get a coffee while my boat quietly made it's way to eighty meters... when I come back it's no longer on the hydrophone, then when I listen properly I get a stationary contact right up close...

went back to periscope depth, saw her at 500 meters, hit her with 3 more eels, then did the following...

http://home.planet.nl/%7Efourn003/im...ayseemdumb.jpg

I thought I'd try a boarding action, where their guns couldn't reach me...:arrgh!:

that worked out well, except for Bernard not shutting down the engine....:o

http://home.planet.nl/%7Efourn003/images/kerbladda.jpg

amazingly, that didn't kill me.... instantly..., the pressure at 174 meters did though

Do I get a cooky? :D

tell em the truth Pinnochio http://img413.imageshack.us/img413/7222/liarrv1.gif

Tell em what you were really hunting for http://imgcash3.imageshack.us/img524...nocchioij9.gif


http://img113.imageshack.us/img113/7...ebigtb9fg3.gif

I have a couple careers that went Bernard on me.

The most embarassing was when I was driving out of Wilhelmshaven. I spoted the Tirpitz docked there so I decided to steer over for a closer look and to take some snapshots of my Uboat next to it. Then the phone rang. I left Bernard in charge and answered the phone. The conversation lasted longer than I expected and when I returned, I got back just in time to see my Uboat plow right into the Tirpitz. After that embarrasing fiasco, as we were leaving the harbor, we got too close to the sub net. *BANG !!* All hands lost except me and Bernard.

Meh, OK, I was hunting for Jimbuna's Q-ships, those had blown me out of the water earlier too :shifty:

I do think taunting a battleship like that is serious hubris though :cool:

my first career was the biggest disastor so far, i never left port crashed against an ally ship.

:(:(

Yah guys, great stories all around :lol:

My shortest patrol ever lasted all of five minutes or so. Here's what happened:

We're starting out docked at Kiel, and I'm in the command room plotting our course. I draw a couple of waypoints to get us going down the channel, and the guys then promptly steer the boat out at 10kts. Just as I'm contemplating the mission ahead with deeply burrowed brows - you know, thinking about the dangers and inconveniences waiting for us on the high seas - I hear a godawful crash and some loud bangs, and a deckhand yelling "Sir! The boat is taking damage!"

Well, turns out that our beloved helmsman Bernard had driven the boat into a dock wall at flank speed. The man is cleaning toilets from now on, I'm telling ya!

But what a perfect slapstick event still: I'm down there sombrely thinking of our second dangerous voyage to final destinations yet unknown... and the moment is interrupted by my crew ramming the boat into a dock wall. Oh the drama indeed... and the band, needless to say, just kept on playing of course :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

More a laughable patrol, not long after the game came out i came back from a patrol thinking i did quite well for sinking 7 ships only to find out when i looked at the results i had sunk 7 friendlies...:o :88)

Departed Wilhelmshaven, went to the loo because getting out of port sucks and takes forever. Came back just in time to be rammed by the escort ship (whatever class it is) then CTD when I try to start a new career. Double-whammy!

edit; OMFG now I have this stupid medic avatar. I look like a space man from a bad 50's B-movie.

My most laughable career was not really laughable, just kind of stupid. On my very first patrol, first time out of harbour with my very clumsy fingers I accidently hit hard starboard after my wife called out to me for something. While I was talking to her, I didn't notice the concrete wall rapidly approaching ... ending with the destruction of my boat and its crew :damn:

Sailing out of lorient i collided with the U-boat pen, perhaps the pilot was drunk :nope:


In my first patrol with sh3 ... i was firing my deck gun to a little merchant at night in the britis channel when i noticied a search light very close to me, i ordered crash dive but the destroyer was so near that he miss my tail only by a few meters.

the deph charges caused severe damage and killed one crew member.

http://img71.imageshack.us/img71/149...10296bmyj5.jpg

Also happened to me... Just left the subpen, then the bombs started falling around me..Bernard (on watch duty) had his new target cap on, that his old aunt Brünhilda in Bremen had sent him for his birthday.
(Here's a pic of her from the birthday-party:)
http://brainlessworld.files.wordpres...1/fat_lady.jpg
(And yes, that's NOT a candle, it's a stick of dynamite..:88) )

Bernards cap with the big red target on top made the brit's bomb run an easy task... So, my steel cigar and all hands went to the bottom...:shifty:

Quoting Bernard Murphy's law;
"...if anything can go wrong, it will, and it will be my fault, no doubt...":doh: :doh:

Seth you seadog, I always wondered where my ex went, that was actually taken during her last diet. Has she showed you the Iron Cross tatoo I got her.:D

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:Actually, she showed it to me....*I'm not gonna say where it is placed, but i can say that you have to look closely and use your periscope wisely..:p ..You might want to get the "Playboy recognition manual" to ID the target properly..*

LMAO :rotfl: