The UK government has recently referred to payday loan companies as “idiotic” for trying to target children and get them into debt. I agree, everyone knows the best way to get a child into debt is to offer them a student loan.
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Earlier today Prince Philip sent a message to the President wishing him a happy Independence Day. His message said “You did a great job destroying the alien mothership and humanity is forever grateful.”
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Hein Döskopp meets his doctor and tells him: "My pointing finger, it is crooked and stiff, I don't know what it is." The doctor says "May I see it?", and Hein raises his hand and shows his finger and yes, the pointing finger is crooked like a fishing hook, and stiff. And the doctor grabs it and tries to pull it and bend it and move it, but all effort is to no avail. Says the doctor: "This is weired, I have no idea what and why it is so. How was your finger before?" And Hein stretches his finger straight and says: "Like this."
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Tried to do some bitcoin mining last night, I now have a pickaxe stuck in my PC.
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Just been arrested at the airport. Apparently “How many do you need?” is a bad response to the question “Do you have any firearms?”
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I heard on the radio today that a warlord in Afghanistan has purchased over 3 million poppies. It’s great to see Islamic military leaders showing their respect to the British Armed Forces.
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Just seen Simon Cowell drowning in my local swimming pool so I saved him ……….. as my profile picture on facebook.
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What do Santa Claus and Lee Harvey Oswald have in common?
They can both be in two places at once. |
David Hasselhoff told his agent that he wants to be known as Hoff from now on..
Agent: Sure David. No hassle. |
Just seen a load of unemployed foreigners hanging around in the streets begging for food. The sooner these Canadian Geese fly off back to where they came from the better.
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I have stopped trying to donate blood.
They ask too many embarrassing questions these days "Where did you get the blood?" "Whose blood was this?" |
Quote:
http://www.subsim.com/radioroom/show...&postcount=330 |
The Greek government has just reported that production of humus and taramasalata is down 50% since the start of the month. Looks like it’s going to be a double dip recession.
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