Granted. All comfort foods are now calorie-free. However, all foods become comfort foods, and the human race dies slowly of malnutrition.

I wish I knew what the hell I was talking about. :-?

Granted, although you will never know anything anymore for the rest of your life, including your name, your family, basic motor skills, the good notions to walk, talk, eat, breath on your own, control your bowel movements, etc.

I wish that I and only I could change the past as I saw fit whenever I wanted, however I wanted without risk of creating some kind of timeloop, destroying the universe and myself, or any of that stuff.

Granted. You are able to change the past as you see fit. Unfortunately, due to the universe being a prototype version of Windows 3, it self destructs anyway. You are given the source code, a twitchy compiler, and a Lua interpreter, with the expectation of porting the universe into a really bad clone of GalCiv.

I wish GalCiv were cloned as a hybrid between LambdaCore and Alpha Centauri.

Granted, but the men in white coats arrive to take you away before this can take place.

I wish paranormality was available in a bottle.

Granted, but your unable to get the cork out because you don't have a corkscrew.

I wish the inevitable was untimely.

Granted. The inevitable happens when you are on the bus when you soil your drawers in public and a video of the untimely event ends up on You-Tube. You become a local laughing stock and are forced to live under a bridge where your only possession is a bottle of paranormality that you cannot open.

I wish the moon was made of Lego.

Granted, but it doesn't taste nearly as good as cheese

I wish I had a new avatar...

Granted, but unfortuneatly, it is smurfette.

I wish raptor1 would take a pichure of himself eating a can of raw spam w/o hands for his 5k post.:haha:

Granted, except the picture is posed with a collection of bikini-wearing super models one of whom decides to adopt Raptor1 as her latest boy-toy.

I wish the space-time continuum came in different colours.

Granted, but seeing as how your colour blind you never realise.

I wish for far more than fullfilment.

Granted, your cellmate makes sure that you are far more than fully filled.

I wish frankess had no qualms.

It should have because I've no idea what the bugga means :DL

I wish it was meant to be 'frankness'

Granted it was and therefore you crush was spoilt.

I wish I could type without error.

Granted, bat nowbady els ke'nt enymoor

I wish we could skip Plan B and go straight to Plan ZZZ

Granted. Plan ZZZ simply states, "refer to plan B."

I wish wives were capable of rational thought.