Granted. Your computer sprouts legs and runs away from you.

I wish I wished I had never wished that wish.

Granted, your wish has been quashed.

I wish to squish the next wish.

Granted. You squish the next wish and spend the next three days scrubbing its remains off your floor.

I wish it would snow more.

Granted, the southern Sahara Desert just got 3.5 metres of the white stuff.

I wish that molehills were mountainous.

Granted, but TarJak squishes your wish and enlists your aid in cleaning its remains off his floor.... plus, the mess is rather mountainous and the process takes weeks.

I wish tear gas was a remedy for dry, gravelly eyes.

Granted, It makes them wet... and burn with pain!

I wish laughing gas was funny...

Granted, and mustard gas is now mustard (And vice-versa)

I wish I could remember what I wanted to wish for...

Granted. You remember that you had wished to remember what you had wished for.

I wish I wasn't so sleepy.

You wish you had Mustard in your refridgerator...

I wish Mustard Gas was green... yellow is getting old...

Granted, Old Yellow now becomes a chick flick that makes a gazillion dollars since Mustard Gas is the new Green. You get no money for wishing this but do get to be decontaminated using kerosine, steel-wool, a buffing wheel and a fire hose.

I wish Nature no longer abhorred a vacuum.

Granted, Nature falls in love with the vacuum and gets sucked to it's doom. We now have to live in an unatural world thanks to your wish.:nope:

I wish Natures vacuum would regurgitate Nature.

Granted, but with a partially dissolved Nature comes the surstromming Vacuum had for dinner a few hours before.

I wish I knew what surstromming tastes like. :o

Granted, you now realise it tastes like sh!t....enjoy.

I wish the inbalance was pivotal to perfection.

Granted but the relentless search for inbalance and struggle for perfection create a catastophic failure in the space-time continuum destroying all life, the universe and everything.

I wish red was the new blue.

Granted, bet seeing as how your colourblind you'll never notice the difference.

I wish the sum of all totals wouldn't add up.