Granted, it sits under eleven tons of rotting fish in Digital_Truckers den. He has a shotgun and is awaiting your arrival.

I wish people were not so quick to unleash rogue stars on the systems of our Swirling Whirlpool of Death Galaxy.

Granted, rogue stars are now slowly unleashed on the systems of our Swirling Whirlpool of Death Galaxy. Therefore, we have plenty of time to see them coming, but can do nothing about it and end up burying our heads in the sand (or places even worse) to avoid seeing the end come only to discover that it has all been an illusion and now our heads are buried for eternity and beyond for no reason.

I wish all the thousands and thousands of my wishes had not been crushed by the evil inhabitants of this thread

Granted lets just take it as written then that I did it all with
extreme prejudice.

I wish a cartoon piano would make the bomb whistle and fall on D.T,'s head a half second after he reads this.

Granted, However the keys did not fully replace his teeth as usually happens

I wish I had some cheese

Granted but its process cheese food slices.
and melba toast.

I wish everybody could have their favourite chocolate.

Granted, everybody has their chocolate, but nobody thanks you for it!

I wish for somebody to push that big "red button"...

Granted, too bad the Big Red Button releases the cartoon piano suspended over your own head. After a rather satistifying kablooie upon impact, you discover that all of Your teeth have been replaced by piano keys. Proof that the system does work, at least in cartoons.

I wish I had an order of fish and chips with a nice cold, non-toxic, non-explosive, non-universe ending half litre mug of beer.

Granted, but you're not hungry anymore

I wish I had that thing

Granted, but it is that 'thing' from the horror movie and it soon kills you.

I wish the tide of opinion would ebb on occasion.

Granted but it flo's against you.

I wish my wife would cook breakfast once in a while.

Granted, she cooks you for breakfast

I forgot what I wished for

Fine we grant you a default wish to 22 tonnes of rotting smoked kippers
in your kitchen.

I wish for a better default wish if I get stuck.

Granted, your default wish is only slightly better than having your eyes soaked in hydrochloric acid

I wish I had the capacity

Granted, but you don't have any way to use it

I wish my Industrial Capacity quadrupled

Granted, but seeing as how it was eight times smaller than TarJaks to begin with, you still have less.

I wish nothing ever mattered.

Granted, and so you are now at total peace with the hated Woman At the Desk Across from Yours since she no longer matters.

I wish rain drops kept falling on my head.

Granted, but now the tune to that stupid song is stuck in the head with the raindrops falling on it and you go completely mad and storm into a grocery store and throw all the melons at the walls and then sit in the ice cream freezer until the funny smelling guys in the white coats come and take you away screaming to be locked up in a rubber room for the rest of your life

I wish I didn't thing of these things http://209.85.12.227/1396/109/emo/busted2.gif

Granted, you don't thing of them, only think of them

I wish I could destroy my enemies with the power of heavy armor and mechanized infantry

Granted but simulatanously the develop tactical nuclear artillery
shells and your invasion dies in its tracks despite your superior
forces.

I wish we drove on driveways and parked on parkways.

Granted, you can even get high on highways.

I wish my face would fit.