Granted, you become so invisible to people that you are run over by an 18-wheeler when crossing the street (The driver never saw you), you are mortally wounded and forced to suffer 72 hours of unimaginable pain before you die (Since everyone ignores you)

Oh, Edit:

Granted, everyone starts talking to him and ignores you completely, the above happens to you instead

I wish the Luftwaffles factory would be reopened

Granted, but they don't make luftwaffles anymore.

I wish everyone would PM Steed and tell him how much we love him.:up:

Granted, but the outpouring of heartfelt good-will makes him sick.

I wish I could tell people that Panda tastes just like Vancouver Island Marmot.

Granted, but nobody believes you

I wish the bombers would bomb...YOU!

Granted, but a russian reversal comes out of nowhere and YOU bomb the bombers.


I wish House would never end and would run on for ever, and because its house no one will get sick of it and there would be no famine, war, aliens, imploding, giant robot hitlers to stop it either.

Granted, but a horrifying accident on the set involving a name-brand suppository, a nuclear reactor, a box of raw chicken gizzards and a bran muffin result in cancellation because there are no longer any cast members or production crew left. A positive side effect is that the writers can now only write in cruciform which no producers can read.

I wish for a virulent plague of deadly halitosis to sweep through the Peoples Republic of Raptorland for sending bombers after ME.

Granted, but since there's no People's Republic of Raptorland (Those damn Socialists failed) the plague sweeps through Randomland instead

I wish Randomizer wouldn't attach that YOU to himself...

Granted, he attaches that YOU to you.


I wish i made Hugh Laurie, the rest of the cast and the production crew immortal in my last wish.

Granted but it all comes together for a remake of the mummy
and a Giant Pyramid suddenly materializes above your head
and becomes instantly acquainted with some of the more subtle
features of Gravity.

Now that we have M theory to resolve the
differences between Special Relativity and Quantum
mechanic's. I wish I could invent the worlds first official
interdimensional Practicle joke.:|\\
(I think I am about to do that.)

I wish I wasnt having amnesia and deja vu at the same time.:doh:

Granted, but because you forgot what you thought you had seen and done before, the joke fell flat.

I wish I wasn't pan dimensional.

Granted, due to your interdimensional practical joke, you now have Exploding Head Syndrome instead

I wish the bombers would attack everyone but me at random

Granted, they attack everyone else regularly and you randomly but with bigger payloads.

It still wish I was pandimensional.

Granted, but due to the fact that you wished you weren't pan dimensional in your last post, the wishes cancel each other out

I wish the fighters defended me from the bombers

Granted but they soon spot your markings are of your enemy.

I want to meet myself 25 years ago and tell him to stay away from Subsims if he wants a life.

Granted, but then you'll cause a warp in the space-time continuum and be forced to play Pac-Man for a 1,000 years.

I want to learn to dance like Michael Jackson.

Granted but because you were seventy five yrs old at the time
Dislocate your personality

I wish Digital Trucker could type faster

Granted, he can now type so fast that his volume of posts overload the SUBSIM server and nobody else ever gets a word in edgewise or otherwise ever again.

I wish I had an atomic-powered hedge trimmer. One that won't explode.

Granted, but the bored 80 year old from next door cuts your hedge for you, therefore making your hedge trimmers usless.


I wish i could be the best Prime minister Britain ever had.

You are but because of your penchant for radioactive topiary
your thrown out of office as a suspected mime appeaser.

I wish I had a P-38L

Granted but you find out it is only a left-handed can-opener.

I wish candy was not so fattening