Log in

View Full Version : Trying to live up to the Schnitzel family name


BaronVonSchnitzel
10-08-05, 11:18 PM
I need some advice. I am Baron Von Schnitzel, a relatively inexperienced U-boat captain. It is March 9,1942 in the 10th flotilla. I am commanding a Type IXC, the proud U-802. My men are good and strong, but seem to tire too easily. This has been a relatively uneventful patrol. I completed my requisite 24 hours at some distant box and headed back to the shipping lanes SW of England. A few days ago I sunk (with too many torpedoes) a coastal merchant and a smalll merchant at BE36 (4380 tons total).

I am currently at BF-74 sitting idle on the surface, waiting for the waters to calm so my men can reload the forward tubes. I have one fish in tube number 2, but my remaining forward fish are in external stores (6 of them). I want to sink many ships for the motherland! I need advice on how to proceed to most satisfactorily complete my mission!

First, a little background. As I said, I am Baron Von Schnitzel. Yes, THAT Baron Von Schnitzel. I indeed am the heir to the magnificent Schnitzel family fortune. As you'll undoubtebly recall, my father invented the schnitzel. I got this job only because of the political connections of my family. I have a lot of questions about how to do my job. I fear word will get back to my father in Berlin that I have already been admonished to "be more aggressive". I don't want to dishonor the proud "Schnitzel" name and ruin my burgeoning naval career. Hencewith (is that a word?), I ask your advice.

Should I head further south in the hopes of calmer waters to relaod my external stores or should I simply wait here some more and hope the weather clears? I wan to use all my fish before I return to Lorient with my crew for a much needed rest. My hull is currently at 83%.

Please answer me for the sake of the motherland and, most of all, the honor of the Schnitzel family name. :damn:

The Avon Lady
10-09-05, 02:21 AM
To uphold the Schnitzel family honor and tradition, shouldn't you be using every tactic in the book to get yourself battered? :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Gizzmoe
10-09-05, 02:27 AM
:doh: :lol:

BaronVonSchnitzel
10-09-05, 03:26 AM
To uphold the Schnitzel family honor and tradition, shouldn't you be using every tactic in the book to get yourself battered? :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:


No, fair lady( oops, sounds a bit english) I have redeemed myself, at least so far. Feeling the need to press on ( oops, also sounds a little english), I continued my journey south in the hopes the water would clear so I could reload my fish from the external stores. Finally, after heading south on the surface for a few days, U-802 wound up at CG75 where the weather cleared up enough for my loyal men to spend about a day loading the fish into the sub.

On the trip south I was fortunate to sink an additional coastal merchant for an additional 2044 tons into the Schnitzel Karma Kitty. Yes, I'm feeling quite confident right now, Miss Avon, confident that I will be able to restore the honor to the proud Schnitzel family name. Now I have six more fish in my boat and I intend to use them. I'll keep you all posted.

BaronVonSchnitzel
10-09-05, 03:41 AM
By the way, I might add that despite my inexperience, my crew looks forward to sailing on my boat because of the food. In addition to the stale fruit and rancid salted meat that all submariners share, I bring aboard many cases of our own "Schnitzel" brand schnitzel. Yes, tuesday nights are schnitzel night on U-802, and our meals are the talk of the whole fleet, in case you haven't heard. :|\

Zero Niner
10-09-05, 04:27 AM
To uphold the Schnitzel family honor and tradition, shouldn't you be using every tactic in the book to get yourself battered? :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Lol! Good pun! :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :up:

hakkikt
10-09-05, 02:59 PM
First, a little background. As I said, I am Baron Von Schnitzel. Yes, THAT Baron Von Schnitzel. I indeed am the heir to the magnificent Schnitzel family fortune. As you'll undoubtebly recall, my father invented the schnitzel.

No matter how hard you try, you will never come near the glorious career of Kapitänleutnant von Würstel.

Seeteufel
10-09-05, 03:08 PM
I am Graf Porno. Yup, THAT Graf Porno.

...but I'm really trying to keep this secret, you know...

Christian Reich
10-09-05, 04:53 PM
Perhaps you know a distant cousin of mine. May have even served together at some point.

Kapitänleutnant Spätzle. A real squared away sailor. Always used plenty of starch on his uniform. Good man

BaronVonSchnitzel
10-09-05, 04:59 PM
Perhaps you know a distant cousin of mine. May have even served together at some point.

Kapitänleutnant Spätzle. A real squared away sailor. Always used plenty of starch on his uniform. Good man

The name vaguely rings a bell...I think I ran into him at an Oktoberfest. Yeah...he was wearing green lederhosen...I do remember him! Good man!

Small world, eh?

Christian Reich
10-09-05, 05:01 PM
HA Ole rascal and his lederhosen.

Small world indeed
[/code]

Zero Niner
10-09-05, 07:47 PM
Hmmm, I've had breakfast already.
So why do I suddenly feel the urge for some Austrian delicacies? :D

Christian Reich
10-09-05, 08:22 PM
because there is nothing that makes you hungrier than old german sea dog stories

BaronVonSchnitzel
10-09-05, 08:50 PM
Hmmm, I've had breakfast already.
So why do I suddenly feel the urge for some Austrian delicacies? :D


A nice strudel does sound good right now. I try to stay away from them, though. They make my tummy huge and bloated like a Zeppelin. :damn:

BaronVonSchnitzel
10-09-05, 11:32 PM
So, I completed my mission satisfactorily. I sunk another coastal merchant on the way back north, but with a high torpedo toll. With two forward fish left, I decided to return to Lorient and visit my dear ol' dad. I had bagged approx. 10k tons of merchant ships, my crew weary but intact, and the Schnitzel name is still in good stead!
It was just one of those patrols...not everything you had hoped it would be!

I think i'll trade my IXC in for a VIIC. Driving this IXC is like parking a Hummer in a Taco Bell parking lot...difficult to do.

Always proud to be a Schnitzel!