GoldenRivet
12-05-19, 02:04 PM
Gentlemen and Ladies,
I make this post here at subsim in the hopes that it will help someone down the line and I feel like, with the passage of a few weeks, I can accurately write about the situation here. This post is for those of you young guys particularly - i do not post this for any sympathy or message of grief, while those are appreciated, they are at this point unwarranted as long as this helps someone.
On November 14th, 2019, I was laying in bed sound asleep at 7:30am. I had a light work day that day and thus a rare opportunity to sleep in past 8am. My phone rang, it was my wife in a near state of hysteria.
Her son, my stepson, Tyler, at the age of 23, was killed in a single vehicle accident while on his way to work at 5:31 am that very morning. Despite being religious about wearing his seatbelt, for whatever reason, at the time of the accident, the seatbelt was not in use.
Per witnesses to the accident, and the final report submitted by the state police, the vehicle was travelling eastbound in the left-hand lane of a two-lane highway. At approximately 70 miles per hour (113 km/h) consistent with the posted highway speed, the left side tires momentarily dipped off the roadway into a grassy median. This resulted in an oversteer correction to the right, causing a loss of directional control. As the vehicle skidded sideways along its eastbound direction of travel, it reversed directional orientation as it entered the grassy shoulder on the right side of the highway. This grassy shoulder was primarily made up of a gradually sloping drainage ditch, approximately four feet in depth at its peak depth.
At this time, the vehicle, still moving in a sideways direction, struck a signpost. This impact was enough to straighten the vehicle, returning it to a front-end forward position of travel. At this time, the vehicle came to impact a concrete drainage wall of approximately 4 foot in height, constructed to allow water to pass below an overlying driveway entrance path.
The vehicle damage, overall, was relatively minor.
https://i.ibb.co/D8QtKdp/CAR.jpg
Tyler was pronounced dead at the scene of the accident.
Our hypothesis is simple and supported by the evidence at the scene.
On the morning of the accident, Tyler stopped and fueled his vehicle. He then proceeded to McDonald’s and purchased a breakfast sandwich and a bottled orange juice at approximately 5:25am. He then proceeded eastbound on the highway – which, is largely rural, and would have had extremely sparse traffic that time of morning.
After travelling for about 5 minutes, he opened the sack from McDonalds to retrieve his sandwich and drink. It is our assumption, that the drink fell in the passenger side floorboard of the vehicle and he attempted to reach for it. Being unable to reach for the drink with his seatbelt fastened, he unfastened his seatbelt and leaned to the passenger side to grab the drink. At this time, the loss of control initiated.
We found the unopened orange juice bottle in the passenger side floorboard; the breakfast sandwich was found in the seat. There is no evidence to suggest he was sending or receiving text messages. Additionally, any of his friends or family he could have been texting, do not work such an early shift, and would have likely still been asleep. As near as we can tell, his most recent phone activity at the time was almost an hour prior to the accident.
https://i.ibb.co/D8PXYYV/ACCIDENT-RE-CREATION.png
Based upon the coroner’s report, which I will not detail here for obvious reasons, It has been widely concluded, that if he had been wearing his seatbelt, his only injuries would have been superficial scrapes and bruises.
Tyler was a healthy, active, fit 23-year-old man. He had purchased his first home not 3 weeks prior to the accident and was excited about completing his move in. At least two rooms of the home still had not had all their boxes, decorations and furnishings unpacked and arranged. His first mortgage payment, which is typically deferred for the first month of occupancy, was not yet due.
Just a few months ago, he had purchased a mostly restored 1968 Ford Mustang which he had hoped to finish upon the previous owner’s work, and planned to enter the car into local charity car show events. As he was renting an apartment at the time of purchasing the 68 mustang, he had been using my home address to ship parts which he had ordered for the car. They arrive on my doorstep still today.
Tyler was working as a county corrections officer at the local jail. There he worked with inmates in crafts, most frequently helping them pass the time by making small wooden crosses. He was nearing the completion of his obligations needed to become a licensed police officer.
In company with his work companions, he had recently taken up the hunting sports and hoped to claim his first deer at the next rifle season and was amassing a respectable collection of hunting and sporting rifles.
Tyler had a heart of gold, an amazing sense of humor, was a photobomber of ninja-like stealth, was an extraordinarily family oriented young person and loved American Football with a passion.
Being that he was a single male, with no children, and had no legal will of any kind – his home, his car, all of his belongings, his bank accounts etc will largely have to go to probate court where it will be decided how this property is to be divided between his mom, his biological father and possibly his siblings.
I realize, that due to the nature of this group, there are probably a lot of 20 something males who like to polish on their cars, who have hopes and dreams about careers, who have plans to do things with their life just as Tyler did. So it is for you guys that I write this.
First and foremost. Wear your seatbelt, everywhere. Don’t take it off, even stopped at a stop light or stop sign. Don’t remove it for any reason other than reaching your destination and having to remove it to get out of the car.
Some young men choose not to wear it – I don’t know why – perhaps they think it isn’t cool, or it makes them look sissy. I don’t know, but if that is your attitude – if you had seen the way Tyler's mother, sister and grandmother collapsed upon the ground in a crying heap on receiving the news of him being killed in an otherwise survivable accident – and put your own mothers, grandmothers and sisters in their shoes... your attitude about seatbelts would change. I guarantee that. For those of you who wear your seatbelts without fail - i thank you in advance. You have saved your family a great deal of heartache with a simple click.
Second, the minute you turn of legal age in your country or state of residence – Get a will and update it whenever you have a life change. I have a will, i didnt get one until i was about 36 years old, I thought it would be a pain in the rear end, but it took minutes – even going through an attorney as I did, it was a breeze, and it was cheap. I don’t care if all you own is a collection of submarine simulations and a fast PC. Get a will. You can always have it modified when you buy a house. A boat. A classic car. a private island. Get married. Have children. whatever. And it will save those who survive you thousands of dollars in probate court costs and attorneys fees if you just spent ten minutes to make your final wishes known. Its NOT about who gets what in your stack of toys... its totally about making the life of those who survive you easier.
Finally, get life insurance, whether whole life, or term life, it is cheap to the point of being kindergarten math when you are 23 years old. The longer you wait and age, the more expensive it becomes. You dont have to have a million dollar policy. You can just get $10,000. If you pass away without life insurance, those who survive you will bear the cost of your final expenses. Even a relatively cheap funeral is still $3,000 - $5,000. I am incredibly thankful that Tyler had the foresight, even if it was a momentary impulse, to opt into his employer's life insurance plan when he was hired.In the end it probably cost him only a few dollars per pay check, but it more than abundantly covered the cost of his funeral expenses saving his mother and I a potentially serious financial burden.
heed this advice. And thank you for reading.
I make this post here at subsim in the hopes that it will help someone down the line and I feel like, with the passage of a few weeks, I can accurately write about the situation here. This post is for those of you young guys particularly - i do not post this for any sympathy or message of grief, while those are appreciated, they are at this point unwarranted as long as this helps someone.
On November 14th, 2019, I was laying in bed sound asleep at 7:30am. I had a light work day that day and thus a rare opportunity to sleep in past 8am. My phone rang, it was my wife in a near state of hysteria.
Her son, my stepson, Tyler, at the age of 23, was killed in a single vehicle accident while on his way to work at 5:31 am that very morning. Despite being religious about wearing his seatbelt, for whatever reason, at the time of the accident, the seatbelt was not in use.
Per witnesses to the accident, and the final report submitted by the state police, the vehicle was travelling eastbound in the left-hand lane of a two-lane highway. At approximately 70 miles per hour (113 km/h) consistent with the posted highway speed, the left side tires momentarily dipped off the roadway into a grassy median. This resulted in an oversteer correction to the right, causing a loss of directional control. As the vehicle skidded sideways along its eastbound direction of travel, it reversed directional orientation as it entered the grassy shoulder on the right side of the highway. This grassy shoulder was primarily made up of a gradually sloping drainage ditch, approximately four feet in depth at its peak depth.
At this time, the vehicle, still moving in a sideways direction, struck a signpost. This impact was enough to straighten the vehicle, returning it to a front-end forward position of travel. At this time, the vehicle came to impact a concrete drainage wall of approximately 4 foot in height, constructed to allow water to pass below an overlying driveway entrance path.
The vehicle damage, overall, was relatively minor.
https://i.ibb.co/D8QtKdp/CAR.jpg
Tyler was pronounced dead at the scene of the accident.
Our hypothesis is simple and supported by the evidence at the scene.
On the morning of the accident, Tyler stopped and fueled his vehicle. He then proceeded to McDonald’s and purchased a breakfast sandwich and a bottled orange juice at approximately 5:25am. He then proceeded eastbound on the highway – which, is largely rural, and would have had extremely sparse traffic that time of morning.
After travelling for about 5 minutes, he opened the sack from McDonalds to retrieve his sandwich and drink. It is our assumption, that the drink fell in the passenger side floorboard of the vehicle and he attempted to reach for it. Being unable to reach for the drink with his seatbelt fastened, he unfastened his seatbelt and leaned to the passenger side to grab the drink. At this time, the loss of control initiated.
We found the unopened orange juice bottle in the passenger side floorboard; the breakfast sandwich was found in the seat. There is no evidence to suggest he was sending or receiving text messages. Additionally, any of his friends or family he could have been texting, do not work such an early shift, and would have likely still been asleep. As near as we can tell, his most recent phone activity at the time was almost an hour prior to the accident.
https://i.ibb.co/D8PXYYV/ACCIDENT-RE-CREATION.png
Based upon the coroner’s report, which I will not detail here for obvious reasons, It has been widely concluded, that if he had been wearing his seatbelt, his only injuries would have been superficial scrapes and bruises.
Tyler was a healthy, active, fit 23-year-old man. He had purchased his first home not 3 weeks prior to the accident and was excited about completing his move in. At least two rooms of the home still had not had all their boxes, decorations and furnishings unpacked and arranged. His first mortgage payment, which is typically deferred for the first month of occupancy, was not yet due.
Just a few months ago, he had purchased a mostly restored 1968 Ford Mustang which he had hoped to finish upon the previous owner’s work, and planned to enter the car into local charity car show events. As he was renting an apartment at the time of purchasing the 68 mustang, he had been using my home address to ship parts which he had ordered for the car. They arrive on my doorstep still today.
Tyler was working as a county corrections officer at the local jail. There he worked with inmates in crafts, most frequently helping them pass the time by making small wooden crosses. He was nearing the completion of his obligations needed to become a licensed police officer.
In company with his work companions, he had recently taken up the hunting sports and hoped to claim his first deer at the next rifle season and was amassing a respectable collection of hunting and sporting rifles.
Tyler had a heart of gold, an amazing sense of humor, was a photobomber of ninja-like stealth, was an extraordinarily family oriented young person and loved American Football with a passion.
Being that he was a single male, with no children, and had no legal will of any kind – his home, his car, all of his belongings, his bank accounts etc will largely have to go to probate court where it will be decided how this property is to be divided between his mom, his biological father and possibly his siblings.
I realize, that due to the nature of this group, there are probably a lot of 20 something males who like to polish on their cars, who have hopes and dreams about careers, who have plans to do things with their life just as Tyler did. So it is for you guys that I write this.
First and foremost. Wear your seatbelt, everywhere. Don’t take it off, even stopped at a stop light or stop sign. Don’t remove it for any reason other than reaching your destination and having to remove it to get out of the car.
Some young men choose not to wear it – I don’t know why – perhaps they think it isn’t cool, or it makes them look sissy. I don’t know, but if that is your attitude – if you had seen the way Tyler's mother, sister and grandmother collapsed upon the ground in a crying heap on receiving the news of him being killed in an otherwise survivable accident – and put your own mothers, grandmothers and sisters in their shoes... your attitude about seatbelts would change. I guarantee that. For those of you who wear your seatbelts without fail - i thank you in advance. You have saved your family a great deal of heartache with a simple click.
Second, the minute you turn of legal age in your country or state of residence – Get a will and update it whenever you have a life change. I have a will, i didnt get one until i was about 36 years old, I thought it would be a pain in the rear end, but it took minutes – even going through an attorney as I did, it was a breeze, and it was cheap. I don’t care if all you own is a collection of submarine simulations and a fast PC. Get a will. You can always have it modified when you buy a house. A boat. A classic car. a private island. Get married. Have children. whatever. And it will save those who survive you thousands of dollars in probate court costs and attorneys fees if you just spent ten minutes to make your final wishes known. Its NOT about who gets what in your stack of toys... its totally about making the life of those who survive you easier.
Finally, get life insurance, whether whole life, or term life, it is cheap to the point of being kindergarten math when you are 23 years old. The longer you wait and age, the more expensive it becomes. You dont have to have a million dollar policy. You can just get $10,000. If you pass away without life insurance, those who survive you will bear the cost of your final expenses. Even a relatively cheap funeral is still $3,000 - $5,000. I am incredibly thankful that Tyler had the foresight, even if it was a momentary impulse, to opt into his employer's life insurance plan when he was hired.In the end it probably cost him only a few dollars per pay check, but it more than abundantly covered the cost of his funeral expenses saving his mother and I a potentially serious financial burden.
heed this advice. And thank you for reading.