View Full Version : When children do it, its understandable, but not when the adults do it.
I will tell you a story about the neighbor's daughter who have some physical and mental handicaps, she is about 13-14 years old.
One day I was waiting for the bus and so was she. We were talking about this and that..
I asked her if she was looking forward to the summer holiday, she was of course. I asked her how things was going in school.
Then she told me that the other children at school, now and then mocked her, due to her disabilities.
I said she should forgive them thou they do not know-they are as you-just children.
Then she said something, Even the adult do it.
Do they mock you? I replied
No not exactly. then she said
Not so long ago I was visiting a friend and we were at the playground and playing with other children there-then some grown-up came and toke one of the children and said-Haven't I told you not to play with that weirdo.
it felt like a dagger struck my heart when I heard that. I also felt a huge furious inside me.
Markus
Catfish
04-15-15, 02:58 PM
Markus, i really do like your attitude :up:
I have experienced similar 'events', and it does not only imply disabled persons of any age, but also insults against people from abroad.
I have only recently learned to speak up immediately, but i admit i probably would not do this in a bus full of skinheads. Chicken-hearted, i know.
The thing is, if only one person speaks up, most others suddenly support, but it seems to need some .. seed chrystal.
Markus, i really do like your attitude :up:
I have experienced similar 'events', and it does not only imply disabled persons of any age, but also insults against people from abroad.
I have only recently learned to speak up immediately, but i admit i probably would not do this in a bus full of skinheads. Chicken-hearted, i know.
The thing is, if only one person speaks up, most others suddenly support, but it seems to need some .. seed chrystal.
Thank you. I just can't stand adults acting like they were imbecile and absolutely not when it's against children.
Markus
It's a sad thing that some adults are not deserving of the word, and some children are more mature than adults.
In my view nobody is really disabled as nobody is perfect in the first place, my mate has a son with down syndrome and is absolutely brilliant at computer games and is one of the nicest blokes i have ever met.
HunterICX
04-16-15, 05:47 AM
Never laughed at one, only laughed with them.
What I like about them is that they're the real deal, what you see is what you get and they do not hide behind something they aren't. In some cases they're even wiser and smarter then the rest of us.
NeonSamurai
04-16-15, 07:25 AM
I wouldn't consider it understandable when children do such things. Children need to be corrected in their behavior, or you just end up with more of the aforementioned adults.
In my view nobody is really disabled as nobody is perfect in the first place, my mate has a son with down syndrome and is absolutely brilliant at computer games and is one of the nicest blokes i have ever met.
I can tell you have never been exposed to severely disabled people, or wouldn't have written the above (as nice a sentiment as it was). From the description, your friend's son would be considered high functioning (most people with Down Syndrome tend to be mid to high functioning). Low functioning Down Syndrome, is very different. Children and adults that are considered low functioning, generally cannot talk (some may be able to use basic sign language, most can vocalize), they are also unable to care for themselves. They also tend to have very limited comprehension, and coordination. There a number of other conditions/syndromes/diseases that also cause severe disability, some that have even worse presentations.
Wolferz
04-16-15, 07:40 PM
http://i205.photobucket.com/albums/bb295/Wolferz_2007/tumblr_ndjrum0hb01rlo1q2o1_1280.jpg
I wouldn't consider it understandable when children do such things. Children need to be corrected in their behavior, or you just end up with more of the aforementioned adults.
I can tell you have never been exposed to severely disabled people, or wouldn't have written the above (as nice a sentiment as it was). From the description, your friend's son would be considered high functioning (most people with Down Syndrome tend to be mid to high functioning). Low functioning Down Syndrome, is very different. Children and adults that are considered low functioning, generally cannot talk (some may be able to use basic sign language, most can vocalize), they are also unable to care for themselves. They also tend to have very limited comprehension, and coordination. There a number of other conditions/syndromes/diseases that also cause severe disability, some that have even worse presentations.
Guess i will just shut up in future.
Stealhead
04-16-15, 10:11 PM
Never laughed at one, only laughed with them.
What I like about them is that they're the real deal, what you see is what you get and they do not hide behind something they aren't. In some cases they're even wiser and smarter then the rest of us.
I remeber once when I was stationed in Tuscon with the Air Force we got the chance to help out with the Special Olympics for a few days in place of normal duties. It was optional of course and some people didn't go they really missed out.
Aktungbby
04-16-15, 10:38 PM
I have a nephew with autism who is getting his degree in and is a genius at computers and another cousin-once-removed with severe Down's syndrome. Working at security at several Bay area social security offices, the appeals courts, and severe disability care facilities, you get used to ....everything. Several work enthusiastically at menial tasks at fast food restaurants in the area such as MacDonald's and one used to fuel my rig at Bison, Wyoming back in the day. The thing is: 'silence implies consent' and when an 'insensitive' adult or child does some insensitive thing-simply speak up: "Not Right buddy" or "Oh pickin' on the afflicted today SIR!" and the malfeasor usually thinks better of his being 'a real jerk' especially to a kid and in front of witnesses. Someone just has to lead off and encourage those who are reticent but will be supportive on the bandwagon. Not uncommonly: "yeah my sister's kid....what am I thinking" is the apologetic response. Rule one: no standing around in silence if it happens in front of you; otherwise you're part of the problem and not the solution.
Eichhörnchen
04-17-15, 02:29 AM
Absolutely and 100 per cent right, Aktung...:up:
NeonSamurai
04-17-15, 10:27 AM
Guess i will just shut up in future.
I'm sorry, I was not trying to silence you.
What you wrote is a nice idea, but I can't entirely agree with it. While there are many people that have a disability (or difference) and are able to overcome and/or adapt to it, and even excel, there are others where there is no such possibility to overcome or excel because the disability(ies) are so profound.
I think we like to focus on the individuals from the first category, and do our best to ignore and avoid the latter. I use to work with people with severe disabilities, and this topic is a bit of a sensitive area for me, because of the attitudes and expectations of the general populous.
I have a nephew with autism who is getting his degree in and is a genius at computers and another cousin-once-removed with severe Down's syndrome. Working at security at several Bay area social security offices, the appeals courts, and severe disability care facilities, you get used to ....everything. Several work enthusiastically at menial tasks at fast food restaurants in the area such as MacDonald's and one used to fuel my rig at Bison, Wyoming back in the day. The thing is: 'silence implies consent' and when an 'insensitive' adult or child does some insensitive thing-simply speak up: "Not Right buddy" or "Oh pickin' on the afflicted today SIR!" and the malfeasor usually thinks better of his being 'a real jerk' especially to a kid and in front of witnesses. Someone just has to lead off and encourage those who are reticent but will be supportive on the bandwagon. Not uncommonly: "yeah my sister's kid....what am I thinking" is the apologetic response. Rule one: no standing around in silence if it happens in front of you; otherwise you're part of the problem and not the solution.
While I agree, I also think that one needs to be cautious when trying to defend someone (particularly if you do not know them), as you also need to take into consideration the feelings of the person that was the target. For one thing, you can inadvertently insult or hurt the person you are trying to stand up for (I know a few people who would be offended by 'pickin on the afflicted'). Also you can in the process of defending the person, affirm that person's own helplessness, by demonstrating to them that they cannot stand up for themselves. Plus this can be a major source of embarrassment and unwanted attention for that person, as by publicly defending them, you are also calling attention to them and their situation, attention that they may not want.
I'm not saying it is all bad though, as there can be a lot of positives too depending on how it is handled, including affirming their sense of belonging, demonstrating that other people do care about them, and stuff like that.
I would just think before acting and choose my words with care :)
Some corporations are waking up to the potentials and talents of people with disabilities; this from about a week ago:
http://www.disabilityscoop.com/2015/04/07/microsoft-employees-autism/20193/
<O>
Platapus
04-18-15, 06:40 AM
No silence does not indicate consent. It can't.
Silence indicates apathy or a desire not to express an opinion. But never consent.
Try explaining to a judge "well, she did not say no" and see how things go consent wise.
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