View Full Version : My Renter Died.
Armistead
12-03-14, 02:36 PM
I own a few small mill houses that I rent out, one to a nam vet in his 60's. I seldom check on this house or guy and haven't been in the house in a year. He is nice, but very private. His wife died 3 years ago and he only has one vet friend that I know of that visits. I do see him a few times a month and will just talk to him outside. He kept the yard up nicely. Never once late on the rent and always paid cash...
I knew his health was getting poor, lost weight and numerous issues, mainly heart, smokes 3 packs a day...Anyway, his vet friend said he visited him Sunday and he was feeling poor and lil incoherent, but wouldn't go to hospital or doctor. He hadn't heard from him, so went by today, but no answer to the door. Called police and they went in and found him dead on floor beside bed. Seems he died a few days ago. His friend did say it's what he wanted, to just die at home. Said he'd been broken hearted since his dog died this summer.. He did love that old dog...
Strange, no signs of suicide, probably a heart attack or he had a minor stroke Sunday and got worse, but he had laid out his uniform, medals, etc., on the bed perfectly. Course, they had all the officials there and sure they'll look into it more...
Inside the house was beyond sickening. The filth and smell was terrible, old food everywhere, house a wreck. It will need a total cosmetic redo....
Rest in peace Daryl....
Tango589
12-03-14, 02:41 PM
Sorry to hear of his passing.
RIP to an old vet.:salute:
At least you found him pretty quickly, when people living alone pass away they can be left for some time before anyone finds them, especially if their family lives far away or they've been out of communication with them.
RIP Daryl, sir, at least he's reunited with his wife and dog now. :yep:
Armistead
12-03-14, 03:57 PM
Just heard that it was probably a suicide, he had sent a brother 3 states away an email goodbye. Probably was pills, he had loads of them and that explains why he had his uniform and stuff laid out...
CaptainHaplo
12-03-14, 05:17 PM
May he rest in peace.
Nippelspanner
12-03-14, 06:09 PM
A tragic.
Whatever made him do it, I feel sorry for him.
I wonder how many suicides it takes before people take depressions more serious and don't put it down as people "being weak" or "cowards" or whatever bullcrap they call it...
Armistead
12-03-14, 06:28 PM
A tragic.
Whatever made him do it, I feel sorry for him.
I wonder how many suicides it takes before people take depressions more serious and don't put it down as people "being weak" or "cowards" or whatever bullcrap they call it...
Hard to know. He had two kids, but he said he hadn't spoken to them in many years. He did have a bad drinking problem but had been sober for about 5 years. I was taken aback when I saw how he was living inside...it smelled so bad I could hardly stand it and the nicotine stains were thick on everything, just buckets filled with butts...The once white walls looked tan...
He never acted depressed to me, except complaining about his health, but having lost his wife, seems his dog and one friend was all he had. He told great war stories and was really in some serious crap.
I felt something was up when I saw his uniform perfectly laid out with all his medals and he had a bunch of them...It just pained me to see that, but obvious he cherished those items...
A tragic.
Whatever made him do it, I feel sorry for him.
I wonder how many suicides it takes before people take depressions more serious and don't put it down as people "being weak" or "cowards" or whatever bullcrap they call it...
Which people are you talking about? Ask a 100 different people about it and you'll get at least 90 different opinions on the subject. Personally it sounds to me like the man just ran out of reasons to live. I can hardly blame him for deciding to end a life that had lost all of it's meaning which apparently was very rich.
But with his wife dead, dog gone, dwindling numbers of friends and if my Dads Vietnam unit (196th LIB) is any indication, old army comrades who are dropping like flies. Vietnam has been particularly unhealthy for it's veterans over the long term and this guy was yet another casualty of it. Like my father it just took a long time.
Armistead
12-03-14, 07:22 PM
Which people are you talking about? Ask a 100 different people about it and you'll get at least 90 different opinions on the subject. Personally it sounds to me like the man just ran out of reasons to live. I can hardly blame him for deciding to end a life that had lost all of it's meaning which apparently was very rich.
But with his wife dead, dog gone, dwindling numbers of friends and if my Dads Vietnam unit (196th LIB) is any indication, old army comrades who are dropping like flies. Vietnam has been particularly unhealthy for it's veterans over the long term and this guy was yet another casualty of it. Like my father it just took a long time.
Tend to agree. His health was terrible, he was using a walker, terribly thin, couldn't drive and talk of putting him in a home. He acted and looked 90. He certainly was offered help by many, just the type wouldn't take any.....
Platapus
12-03-14, 07:29 PM
Perhaps, he just decided it was time. He wanted to go with some control.
We may never know. I hope he found the peace he was seeking. :salute:
u crank
12-03-14, 07:56 PM
Perhaps, he just decided it was time. He wanted to go with some control.
That is something I hope everyone gets to decide for themselves if the need arises.
R.I.P. Daryl.
Truly a tragic end to a life. The comment about his fellow vets dying off is particularly salient. I am of an age where I actually have seen veterans of war as far back as the Spanish-American War. As A small child, I would hear stories of Spanish War veterans fading away; in grade school, it was WWI vets (my grandfather included); in high school, it was Korean War vets. Now, as an adult, it is Nam vets, who are very close in age to myself. It seems like a constant parade of people who have given of themselves who face lives of loneliness and isolation...
Good on you, Armistead, for at least keeping up some contact with Daryl. Many such vets would tell you how much even the slightest contact can mean to their lives...
To Daryl, rest in peace and know that, in the end, there were people who cared...
<O>
Nippelspanner
12-03-14, 08:35 PM
Which people are you talking about?
Why not browse Subsim.com for suicide/depression related topics?
You will find your answer there...
swamprat69er
12-03-14, 08:53 PM
I have to agree with u crank on this.
Rest in peace Daryl.
Sailor Steve
12-03-14, 09:18 PM
Why not browse Subsim.com for suicide/depression related topics?
You will find your answer there...
I think, within the context, that he was asking which people are still not taking it seriously, and I think there are a lot who still look at depression as a copout rather than a sickness. There are also a lot of options for help, especially for veterans, but they have to first know about them and then act on them. Before a person can act on those options that person himself has to believe that it is a sickness.
Depression has one thing in common with drinking, which is that when you are in the depressive state is the time you don't believe you have a problem, so the time you need help the most is the time you least seek it out. I guess I'm lucky to have hobbies and interests that keep me focused when I'm depressed. I can't die anytime soon because I've still got too many things I haven't accomplished.
Others don't have that option. They can't see where the problem lies and they don't believe they need help. This isn't their fault, but it can look that way from the outside. I don't know where the answers lie, so I'll leave it there.
em2nought
12-03-14, 10:51 PM
Hope you had a security deposit at least, I'm sorry I don't hold much pity for people that ruin other peoples property, even if he was a "vet". There are just as many dirt bag vets as there are dirt bag regular joes in my opinion. Granted maybe there were bad things that being in the service exposed them to, and I'm sorry for that. Maybe I'm just grouchy cause I'm still cleaning up the last house I rented to somebody five months later.
Jeff-Groves
12-04-14, 01:23 AM
No. No I won't do it.
Armistead
12-04-14, 05:44 AM
Hope you had a security deposit at least, I'm sorry I don't hold much pity for people that ruin other peoples property, even if he was a "vet". There are just as many dirt bag vets as there are dirt bag regular joes in my opinion. Granted maybe there were bad things that being in the service exposed them to, and I'm sorry for that. Maybe I'm just grouchy cause I'm still cleaning up the last house I rented to somebody five months later.
Honestly I was shocked over the shape of the house. Guess I should've done a few inspections like I do my other two, but he was so private and kept the outside up nicely, assumed he did the inside as well. I don't fix these houses up perfectly, but I do make them nice, painted, new carpets, clean and everything works. The inside of this house is destroyed. No lie, the nicotine stains so bad even the windows are covered, like brown tint. The fridge was covered in mold from all the old food. Living like that had to be very unhealthy. I assume a lot because his health got bad the last year and he was strapped for money.
His brother is coming and I'm hoping he will clean the house up of his stuff, he said he would, but my guess is he will come take things of value and leave me with all the junk...
Armistead
12-04-14, 05:59 AM
I think, within the context, that he was asking which people are still not taking it seriously, and I think there are a lot who still look at depression as a copout rather than a sickness. There are also a lot of options for help, especially for veterans, but they have to first know about them and then act on them. Before a person can act on those options that person himself has to believe that it is a sickness.
Depression has one thing in common with drinking, which is that when you are in the depressive state is the time you don't believe you have a problem, so the time you need help the most is the time you least seek it out. I guess I'm lucky to have hobbies and interests that keep me focused when I'm depressed. I can't die anytime soon because I've still got too many things I haven't accomplished.
Others don't have that option. They can't see where the problem lies and they don't believe they need help. This isn't their fault, but it can look that way from the outside. I don't know where the answers lie, so I'll leave it there.
I have a good friend that is a marine vet. He didn't see combat in war, but lost most his friends in the same battalion in the Beirut Barracks Bombings in the early 80's that killed over 200 marines. He drinks badly and I can't even hang with him anymore. Even his brother, another marine vet doesn't speak to him. He relives that moment everyday, talks about it even now nonstop and often is suicidal. Almost weekly he'll post nonsensical rants on FB about it, obviously drunk with a hint of he's had it again. At the same time, numerous of his vet friends that were there seem to be thriving in life and never had issues from it.
Jimbuna
12-04-14, 07:31 AM
A tragic ending....RIP Daryl and hope you find the closure you deserve when meeting up with your wife and dog.
~SALUTE~
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