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Gut Wrench
08-09-14, 06:09 PM
2014 Subsim Fantasy Football
...back in the grind.

Here we go again fans. It's early August and the vermin have begun to surface, knocking their family unconscious in elevators (too soon? :D ) as they squabble for 16 of the most frustrating and exciting fantasy football weeks we've had since...since December last year. Are you ready to make believe and go long for that imaginary team combination we've all dreamed about, that brings a minimum 140 points each week in the hopes of a win?

It's the 2014 Subsim Fantasy Football competition, where we find out just how good Mister Chris and the London Based Helmand Nighthawks are. Our defending champions, and first champion to remove the Holy Grail from the Land of the Free (since Australia II...but that was sailing) they'll be out to show that their dominating performance in last years play offs, wasn't just a fluke. And we'll be there every game of every week, especially those nasty last two minutes of the Monday night game which forces an entire rewrite of this column. But, we do it not for glory, but for fantasy.

OK, we might do it for a little glory, and even though the season hasn't started, nothing has been written in eight months, and some of the coaches don't even know about this column, I'm going to ask you to do the most important two things you can do today.

DONATE TO SUBSIM...AND NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.

Back to the real game.

We'll start with what we know.

Everyone loves to knock off the defending champion, and before we know the results of the draft, we do know that a debutant to the league, will be playing in London in Week 1. Taking the most original name of Micheal's Team, Coach Michael (who'd have thought it) is one of two newcomers to the league, the other being Coach Wolferz of the Bilge Rats.

Apparently there was a sale at Wamart on matching uniforms for aside from the two newcomers, the returning rookie runner up from last year, the Who Dat Nation and the ReallyDedPoets have all purchase the same uniform helmets of gold with a black star.

http://l.yimg.com/dh/ap/fantasy/nfl/img/icon_01_100.png

Commissioner McBee has not yet made public the location of this years draft, but word has it that there was a considerable exchange of favors for the league to have their draft at "the secret location". The Associates Subsim Writers (ASW) have learned of this location are making the necessary bookings for their berths. Stay turned for more information as Draft Day, August 31, approaches, and teams settle in for the grind to the Torpedo Bowl and to be Champion.

Gut Wrench
08-24-14, 11:26 AM
Draft Location Announced
Commissioner Takes To High Seas

Commissioner McBee has outdone himself this year, taking the forthcoming draft to lofty new heights, and onto the High Seas. The location of the 2014 Draft has been announced as a three day cruise of the SS BigAzzShip out of Venice.

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2012/06/06/article-0-136B5647000005DC-483_634x352.jpg

The SS BigAzzShip, partly owned by Commissioner McBee's offshore company, Tax Evasion Inc., has been hired for the event to run a three day cruise during the middle of the European Summer.

"We felt that with the Nighthawks being champions, it was appropriate that the Subsim Fantasy League take advantage of those European women," McBee said at a press conference.

The Commissioner stated that around 200 of the leagues best players will be invited to attend the draft function, and stay on board the ship. To accommodate their needs, round 2000 European women from various cities have been "recruited" to assist with the operation of the event.

Commissioner McBee stated that "this was a a unique opportunity for potential Subsim League players to have one final fling before getting down to the business of the most important sixteen weeks of the year.

Draft Day for the Subsim Fantasy Football League is a week away, scheduled for 1200 Sunday 31 August 2104.

ReallyDedPoet
08-27-14, 11:48 AM
Apparently there was a sale at Wamart on matching uniforms for aside from the two newcomers, the returning rookie runner up from last year, the Who Dat Nation and the ReallyDedPoets have all purchase the same uniform helmets of gold with a black star.

http://l.yimg.com/dh/ap/fantasy/nfl/img/icon_01_100.png



:D:D

Little DedPoet ( he's 16 ) will be taking the reins this year, though under the close guidance of his dad. Well as much as a dad can over a teenager :o:o

And I have changed the above :rock:

https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSCMGPuY8g3YIxgYVe_JuO4ZiMrwM6dk E8PekCRmzXzo98rYGJwmQ

https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQffs2kdU6mKY82BhdiFPz_izLaiBiGx qO2rc1s-DPBrpBnDqO3

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nikimcbee
08-31-14, 01:32 PM
tick,tick,tick,tick...:Kaleun_Los:

nikimcbee
08-31-14, 01:44 PM
I've been having problems with yahoo's server cutting in and out and connecting to the server. This better not crap out on me. If you have problems, just reconnect.

ReallyDedPoet
08-31-14, 01:46 PM
I've been having problems with yahoo's server cutting in and out and connecting to the server. This better not crap out on me. If you have problems, just reconnect.

So I am at the site now, the main page. I just stay there until the thing starts right.

ReallyDedPoet
08-31-14, 01:47 PM
As Mini-RDP is golfing I will be doing his picks for him, not sure if he will be ok with that :hmm2:

nikimcbee
08-31-14, 01:49 PM
Everything seems to bee working (on my end):/\\k:

ReallyDedPoet
08-31-14, 01:56 PM
Everything seems to bee working (on my end):/\\k:

Hey, how did you get the first pic :hmmm::D:D

nikimcbee
08-31-14, 02:47 PM
Hey, how did you get the first pic :hmmm::D:D

Yahoo loves me this year I guess. I nearly fell our of my chair when I saw that. (it's all random btw:D)

ReallyDedPoet
08-31-14, 03:02 PM
Yahoo loves me this year I guess. I nearly fell our of my chair when I saw that. (it's all random btw:D)

Yeah I know, you have been doing this how many years, was this your first time with the #1?

By the way my son is already giving me the gears over the team I picked for him :shifty:

mr chris
08-31-14, 05:39 PM
You picked up Sanders, i was sat their hoping he was going to fall too me but you snagged him a couple of picks before. Alas i will make do Edleman. Good luck to everyone.:up:

ReallyDedPoet
08-31-14, 05:56 PM
You picked up Sanders, i was sat their hoping he was going to fall too me but you snagged him a couple of picks before. Alas i will make do Edleman. Good luck to everyone.:up:

Isn't that always the way, I had my eye on more than a few players only to see them taken :/\\!!

Good luck, should be a great season folks :up:

Gut Wrench
08-31-14, 11:24 PM
Draft Results In
Coach Wolfer Gets an A

Commissioner McBee has outdone himself for the second time this year, somehow manging to secure the first pick of the draft.

"Yeah, really, ummm, that was a surprise," he said after the draft as the news media hounded him for a response. But, as usual, the Associated Subsim Writers were there for the first commentary.

Unlike about half of the league coaches who missed the boat after a wild night of drinking in Venice.

"Ohhhh, I thought the ship would wait for me," Coach FYC of the Black Cats said as the SS BigAzzShip left the dock.

So let's quickly recap the draft and the first reports from the floor.

Defending title holder, Mister Chris and the Helmand Nighthawks are predicted to finish the season in fourth.

"Fourth?" cried Mister Chris. "Bollocks."

Expansion team Wolfer's Bilge Rats have been appraised as having the best draft, however, the ASW predictions is that they will only finish second. The biggest surprise of the draft was that last years upstart Rookie, Fuel for Blood, and the Who Dat Nation are predicted to win the season - even after they too did not show for the draft.

"Argg, who needs to show up when you can draft by carrier pigeon and still enjoy some land loving wenches" Fuel for Blood was heard to say from the Pirates Shack Bar and House of Ill Repute.

At the other end of the spectrum, another expansion team, the Mini Ded Poets Team scored the lowest possible grade.

"We were robbed," Mini Coach Ded was hurl to say, spitting out a dummy. "If Dad had freaking bothered to pick me, like he said he would, I wouldn't be in this spot."

Looks like an awesome forthcoming match up with bragging rights when both the Ded Poet family members meet later in the season.

However, draft's mean nothing, and it's the real game of pretend football that matters, with 16 of the most frustrating weeks scheduled to start in four days. Who will be there in late December to claim the championship, no one knows. The only sure thing is that right now, all teams are tied...and that the two Monday night games will no doubt cause the first rewrite of the year.

For the Associated Subsim Writers, this is Gut Wrench welcoming you, to the Subsim Fantasy Football League. :rock:

Gut Wrench
09-09-14, 12:33 AM
Rising From The Bilge
Rats Gnaw Doggies

Week 1 in the Subsim Fantasy League, and do we have a debut for you. We'll tell you about one of the biggest eye openers since....well since Fantasy Football started. We'll catch up on a thriller, a thriller than could have been, and we'll see how the two newest team did against the foreign imports, as we go around the globe under the light of the silvery "supermoon".

http://blog.clairepeetz.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/supermoon_3b.jpg

But before we do anything else, let's give you the two most important messages that you need to know about.

DONATE TO SUBSIM...AND NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.

Out with the commercials, dim the moon light and on with the highlights.

There are two new teams playing in this years Subsim Fantasy League, and in the first week, each of the new teams had opposing results. Let's start with the Mini Ded Poets, who crossed the Pacific Ocean to play the Australian Taipans. Jet lag much have affected the Mini's player choice because they played not only Jason Witten (TE) and Dan Bailey (K), but they ran on the 49ers (DEF) The 49ers were no slouch though as they high scored for the Mini Dead's with 20 points. On the other side of the paddock, the Taipans started an interesting pair of RB's in Matt Forte and Chris Johnson doing most of the work in the ground and pound. The Taipans send the Mini Dead's home packing with a steady serving, running out eventual winners 102 - 81.

Proving that running the opposition against your defense doesn't always doom you to a loss, last years surprise upstart to the league showed that you can in fact start Adam Vintieri (K) and the Bronco's (DEF) on the same team.

Coach Fuel for Blood after the game said "Yeah, our game plan tonight was not to score a lot of kicking points, and let our defense do the work."

The Who Dat Nation were certainly helped when the Green Beans started Cam Newton, ruled out two days prior to the start of the game with a bruised ego. Despite this, the Beans still managed to utilize Calvin (Megatron) Johnson for two touchdowns and 164 yards. (Who was throwing to him? C'mon Man.) The gap was way too much for the Beans, even when Michael Floyd (WR) scores 16 points on Monday night, as they fall to the Who Dat Nation 113 - 101.

Going across the other ocean, the defending Torpedo Bowl Champions the Helmand Nighthawks started the season at Wembley hosting Michael's Team. The second of three new comers to the league, this Atlantic Crossing was no Rod Stewart as the Nighthawks put a licking on Michael. Despite the valiant effort of QB Matt Ryan scoring 32.21. points, the Nighthawks just played their consistent steady brand of football that lead them to the championship. This game could have been a thriller on Monday night if only Keenan Allen (WR) of Michael's team showed up. Final score, Nighthawks 117 defeat Michael 101.

The biggest upset of the week was the match up between the Wild Boston Terriers and the Bilge Rats. The Terriers, a Commissioner franchise team, after grabbing first pick of the draft, also had the first game of the week. The Doggies, playing at home lead by Russell Wilson, came out strong and began putting up some impressive points before the Rats even got started. But when they got started, start they did and they piled it on. Every player on the Rats team scored double digit points, lead by their QB Matthew Stafford.

"Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week," Stafford said after the game.

After taking the Associate Subsim Writers A+ draft rating, the Rats have come out and on the Terrier's home turf, put up 155 points, one of the highest scored seen in the game. The Terriers were sent to the 0-1 doghouse as the Rats cleaned up 159 - 107.

The thriller of the week belongs to the match up between the Black Cats and the Guns of Hochuli. Two powerhouse teams of past, who both decided that on draft day they had better things to do. In week one they were matched against other. Last year the Cats fielded perhaps the best team on paper, but when it came down to the end, just didn't have enough purr in the tank. Despite being heavily favored in Las Vegas, the ding dong game between the Cats and the Gunners swung with each play. Back and forth they traded the lead seven times through Sunday morning, and by the time they got to Monday night, the game was so close that one pass could decide the game. The Gunners started Larry Fitzgerlad (WR) and frankly, Fitzgerald did not look like he wanted to play. Larry only need one catch to give the Gunners the lead and the win, and we had to wait until 4 minutes before the end of the weekend to get his catch. Final Score, they barely squeak by in one of the historically closest matches ever, Gunners 102.24 defeat the Black Cats 101.58, a margin of .66

So after week one, let's look at where the teams stand.

Half the teams in the league won, the other half lost.

What it does mean is that in week 2, we get to pick and choose the best games to focus on. We pick the defending champions return to the Colony as the Black Cats get to host their first home game of the season after suffering a narrow defeat in week one.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the effort of 7 receptions for 104 yards and 3 receiving TD's, for a total of 35.20 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Julius Thomas of the Bilge Rats the Week One MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

nikimcbee
09-11-14, 04:41 PM
https://img1.etsystatic.com/042/0/5925368/il_340x270.511433715_hb13.jpg

Well played Wolferz.

I was gunna bitch about how lousy my running backs were. Then I saw the score. Nevermind.

It looks like a continuation of last year. I have a good day, I play the person who has the record week.:Kaleun_Sick:

Wolferz
09-11-14, 06:14 PM
https://img1.etsystatic.com/042/0/5925368/il_340x270.511433715_hb13.jpg

Well played Wolferz.

I was gunna bitch about how lousy my running backs were. Then I saw the score. Nevermind.

It looks like a continuation of last year. I have a good day, I play the person who has the record week.:Kaleun_Sick:


We're sorry, we're sorry. We're not sorry.http://i205.photobucket.com/albums/bb295/Wolferz_2007/12491039-rat--halloween-set--vector-illustration.jpg

Gut Wrench
09-15-14, 10:50 PM
RATS AND WHO DAT LEAD
Beans and Michael Still To Score

Week 2 in the Subsim Fantasy League, and we have a surprise league leader, who also happens to be a débutante. We'll tell you about the big battle between two teams where one slithered into oblivion, and just how some these results produced a complete rewrite of the weekend games in the last two minutes of Monday night.

But before we do anything else, let's give you the most important message that you need to know about.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.

Now before we get started on who won, let's have a close look at who could of won, who should have won, and who got injured.

The two most devastating injuries go the Australian Taipans who lost not one, but two key players in the first 60 seconds of the game. Most surprising is that the Australian Taipans had originally attempted to trade away RB Knowshow Moreno earlier in the week. There was some suggested that the Who Dat Nation may have been willing to trade off their suspended WR Wes Welker, but that was quashed as soon as Moreno bruised his ego.

Then we have those coaches who started opposing forces, and there were two this week. Coach Wolfer probably gave away the biggest blow out this week by starting Matthew Stafford (QB) and the Panthers Defense. But lets not think this is just a rookie mistake, for Mister Chris of the defending champion Helmand Nighthawks by starting Matt Bryant (K) and the Bengals Defense.

And now on with the highlights.

Our most impressive game was the Guns of Hochuli and the Mini Ded Poets. The Poets after getting a very unfriendly "welcome" in week one, came out and showed that they have the ability to put up some big scores, eventually racking up 105 points. The Gunner, however, are a past finalist and no push over when it comes to choreographing great victories. Trailing by over 25 points with less than three minutes to go on Monday Night, they rested their team on the arm of Nick Foles (QB) and Codey Parkey (K). With less than 60 seconds to go, Foles finally throws for 300 yards and puts Parkey in a position to kick the Gunners to a 2-0 season. Final score, Guns of Hochuli 110 - Mini Ded Poets 105.

First game of the week to be completed had the Wild Boston Terriers against the Green Beans. Two renown opponents came head to head once again in a battle of titans. And a back and forth deal it was all weekend, with the lead changing several times. After having a previous dud week with Aaron Rodgers (QB) Coach McBee threatened to take away Rodger's discount double check before he finally started showing why he was a second round pick. But it wasn't an easy win, with Brandon Marshall finally bringing his A game late Sunday night. Sunday night is a poor time to be coming back, and the Beans finally ran out of gas. Final score Wild Boston Terriers 95 Green Beans 87.

Our top of the ladder game between the top teams turned into nothing short of a disappointing game - from at least one foreign team. The Bilge Rats and the Australian Taipans were both 1-0 after the first week and frankly, are both a bit of surprise to be leading the league. The Bilge Rats are rookies this year and the Taipans, have been one of these teams always there, but not quite at the end. And so it was that the Taipans just slithered to a show up score, handing the Bilge Rats their second win of the season. Bilge Rats win handily 119 - 89.

After the game Coach Wolfer spoke to the media.

"Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

The easiest win of the week resulting in the biggest blow out were the Who Dat Nation and Coach Michael's team, aptly named Michael's Team. Michael had a couple of stars not show up for the weekend not otherwise affected by child abuse allegations. However, what's looking like a Ghost team, Michael's team just didn't score and becames a sacrificial lamb for the remainder of the season. Fuel for Blood and the Who Dat Nation run out convincing winners 101 - 62.

Our match of the week was a thriller between the Helmand Nighthawls and the Black Cats. The Cats last week were unfortunate not to win, and the Helmand Nighthawks were convincing winners, but this week was a different matter. This was a heavy weight bout between two possible championship defenders who showed that in a week of relative low scoring, these two could lay out some points. The Black Cats laid out an impressive score and waited on the Nighthawks QB Andrew Luck to win it in the last two minutes. Despite throwing for 3 early touchdowns, the Nighthawks fell short by a lot of passing yards. The Black Cats get a win the tough way, through the defending Torpedo Bowl Champions by hanging on for a 116 - 108 win.

So after week two, let's look at where the teams stand.

The Bilge Rats and the Who Dat Nation lead not only the Subsimmers Division but the league. The Wild Boston Terriers sit at 50% and the Green Beans and Michael's team are still looking for their first win.

In the Surface Skimmers Division, the Guns of Holchuli are the only team at 2-0, while the Taipans, Cats and Nighthawks are at 1-1. The Mini Ded Pets bring up the tail at 0-2.

What it does mean is that in week 3, we get a mixed back to choose from. We pick the defending champions and return to Wembley as the Australian Taipans travel for the longest away game ever. Both the Nighthawks and the Taipans look on paper to be the division leaders, but, at 1-1 both teams need to improve to be considered great.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the effort of 346 passing yards for 3 touchdowns and 28 rushing yards, for a total of 30.32 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Aaron Rodgers of the Wild Boston Terriers, the Week Two MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

Gut Wrench
09-22-14, 11:05 PM
RATS AND WHO DAT LEAD
Beans and Michael Still To Score

Week 3 in the Subsim Fantasy League. We can talk about who's leading the league. We can talk about who's leading for first pick of next years draft. We can even talk about the big blow outs experienced in week three. But before we talk about anything else, we have to talk about the most important thing you can do today to save the world.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.

So, maybe not save the world, but you won't know until you do.

Speaking of not saving the world, how about those teams that were up against Julio Jones (WR) and Andrew Luck (QB) this week. Oh wait - both those guys are on the same team, the London based Helmand Nighthawks. And who's ass did they smack this week? The Australian Taipans. Oh the humanity, this one was over by half time on Thursday night.

The Helmand Nighthawk welcome the Australian Taipans on their longest away game of the week, and if they had played almost anyone else, would have gotten the win. The Taipans didn't even run out on the field Thursday night, which is just as well as Julio Jones (WR) would have run right over them. Amassing 9 receptions for 161 yards and two touchdowns, our match of the game this week was being called as whitewash. The Taipans finally got off the bus and arrived at Wembley Stadium Sunday morning, where the onslaught continued. (I checked in on the game once, the Nighthawks were 108 points ahead. :o ) By Sunday morning, Mister Chris had declared his innings closed at 151 and waited out for the Taipans. The gap was just too big, the Taipans never had a hope and finally yielded the L on Monday night. Helmand Nighthawks score almost as many points in this game as they have in the previous two to be convincing winners, 151 - 115.

In the battle of the top and bottom of the ladder, the Bilge Rats prove that they can win convincingly on the road. Débutantes this season, the Bilge Rats traveled to the hollow turf of Michael's Team. Coach Michael started with a big bang with QB Matt Ryan racking up a quick 23 points. However, the job wasn't carried on when his wide receiving and running back corps did not cross for a touchdown. Starting Jordan Reed (TE) out on vacation, only added salt to the wounds, as the Bilge Rats were given a modest total to pursue. The Rats only stand out player was Jeremy Macklin who put the Rats into a winning position, even though starting quarterback Matthew Stafford took points away from the team. Michael will probably lament the opportunity to take away a win from the Bilge Rats, who keep their unbeaten run alive with a 94 - 76 win.

Up in Oregon, the two feisty counterparts that divide the state waged their own Civil War battle. Fuel For Blood in his sophomore year has once again stolen glory away by winning the local derby. The Wild Boston terriers were let down by the running backs who combined for a total of 49 yards. Wide Receiver Pierre Garcon couldn't carry the Terriers as they fall short chasing the lead. Who Dat Nation defeat the Wild Boston Terriers 99-88.

After the game Coach Fuel For Blood addressed the media at the local Hooters establishment.

"Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

Still looking for their first win of the season, The Mini Ded Poets were pitted this week against the Black Cats. The line in Vegas favored the Dead Poets, and that was supported by great efforts from Michael Crabtree and Emanuel Sanders. The Black Cats though, much like a pimple that will not go away, just stayed and stayed and crawled back into the game. Marshawn Lynch (RB) lead the charge but it was not until Monday night that the Cats finally took the lead with Jay Cutler (QB) and Alshon Jeffrey (WR). Black Cats exercise their claws within the division to finish off the Mini Dead Poets 126 - 89.

Now, while the media were all in a frenzy about the Nighthawk blow out, there was another assault going on that had nothing to do with Syria. Two teams renown for not liking each other, and for taking wins and losses away from each other, met for the first time this year. Quietly, as they have in past years, the Guns of Hochuli have sailed under the radar. On the opposite side of the 50 yard line, the Green Beans have just as quietly become fodder as they start the year in one of their worst performances. At 0-2, the Beans were needing some gas in the tank to come forward and blow the Gunner's apart. Alas, it was not to be, and perhaps having received the news of the earlier Nighthawk game, set about putting together one of the biggest blow outs seen in recent times. It was not until Monday night and after Martellus Bennet (TE) had crossed for two touchdowns that the full ramifications of the game were noticed. The Gunners continued to drive home their advantage and just pummeled the Beans, to finally round out the week with a 110 - 64 win.

So after week three, let's see where the possibilities and the probabilities lie.

In the Sub Simmers division, the Bilge Rats and the Who Dat Nation lead at 3-0. Interesting, the Who Dat Nation are 3-0 within the division, while the Bilge Rats are 2-0 within the division, but have scored more points. The Wild Boston Terriers loss to the Who Dat Nation drop them back to 1-2, while the Green Beans and Michael's team squabble for the wooden spoon.

In the Surface Skimmers Division, the Gins of Hochuli have quietly moved to 3-0 by going 2-0 within the division. The Black Cats and the Helmand Nighthawks sit a game back at 2-1, the Australian Taipans another game back at 1-2, and the Mini Ded Poets own the cellar at 0-3.

Next week we go back to the Bilge Rats home sewer for our match of the week where they take on the Guns of Hochuli. The winner of that game will own not only the divisional lead, but the league lead. We'll be there in all our much and glory to cover it from the first kick on Thursday night to the last kneel down on Monday.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the effort of 370 passing yards for 4 touchdowns and 15 rushing yards, for a total of 36.15 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Andrew Luck of the Helmand Nighthawks, the Week Three MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

Wolferz
09-23-14, 03:38 PM
To all the Bilge Rat fans... Flush early and often before the next game. The Guns of the Ochuli should fall nicely with the nose plugs cramping their breathing.:03:

ReallyDedPoet
09-23-14, 08:48 PM
:/\\!!:/\\!!

Gotta get those Mini-DedPoets going....

nikimcbee
09-29-14, 01:58 AM
So this is what it's like to have a functioning FF team?
Anybody want my AP jersey?

Jimbuna
09-29-14, 06:10 AM
Meanwhile:

The Miami Dolphins breezed to a 38-14 victory over the Oakland Raiders in the first of this season's three NFL contests at Wembley.

http://www1.skysports.com/american-football/news/12040/9494414/nfl-ryan-tannehill-and-miami-dolphins-thrash-oakland-raiders-at-wembley-stadium

ReallyDedPoet
09-29-14, 06:47 AM
The mini-poet was on his game yesterday :yep:

Made some nice moves, benched the Niners :rock:, dressed R. Wayne against Tennessee and had
Miami on defence.

Gut Wrench
09-29-14, 10:44 PM
AND BEHOLD, THERE WAS ONE.
Gunners sole team at 4-0

Week 4 in the Subsim Fantasy League. We're going to tell you about the sole team that stands alone undefeated. We'll tell you about one of the teams that earned their first ever win in one of the biggest upsets of the years. And we'll tell you about two teams that had no business being on the field this weekend, and still one of them got a win.

But before we tell you anything else, the first thing we have to do is tell you about the most important thing you need to do today.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.

And the second thing we have to do is apologize for running the same headline last week. Phew. You would think with the money that Neal is paying for this column I could come up with something original and didn't sound like the week before.

Let the fantasy world get turned upside down with one of the biggest beat downs that we've seen in such a long time...no one can pinpoint when it last happened. The Who Dat Nation, hot favorite in Las Vegas to win the entire Championship, stumbled from a perfect season, when they came up against the 0-3 Mini Dead Poets. The Miniatures must have caused the circled this day because they arrived in Oregon with a bang. It's not that the Nation didn't play well, it was more a case that that the Miniatures stunned the fantasy by playing beyond their ability. Jordy Nelson (WR) scored closed to a career high, Reggie Wayne (WR) scored in double figures, and not even the abysmal failure of their quarterback, Tom Brady, could hold the Miniatures back this week. The Mini Dead Poets hand the Who Dat Nation their first loss of the year, and suddenly, the Poets find themselves right back in the chase of the championship at 1-3. Mini Dead Poets steal one away from the Who Dat Nation 124 - 114.

The other big scoring game of the week comes on the back of some commentary by Coach McBee. Earlier in the week, McBee was overheard trying to sell off his team for a 1957 VW bug. Rumor mongering suggest that the team thought they were at least worth a 1974 Golf and set out to create a storm that has made the fantasy world open their eyes. In the past few weeks, the Subsim Torpedo Bowl has been graced by some extremely high scores, and not to be outdone, the Wild Boston Terriers set about establishing a significantly high score. After crossing the Atlantic, Mister Chris and the Helmand Nighthawks had a chase, but when it came down to Monday night, Jamal Charles (RB) just could not carry the team on his own. Wild Boston Terrier choke the Helmand Nighthawks 159 - 100.

But that was not the biggest blow out of the week. Last week we talked about the Black Cats and their rag tag purring through the league. This week, Coach F.Y.C. spurned his team to a new level of performance, against the struggling Green Beans. The Beans in the past few years have been thE "coming and going" team, and this week, they really went away. Starting no less than three players either on vacation or in hospital, the Green Beans barely managed to score their 30 points. The Black Cats took the opportunity to race through and add some for and against leverage by managing a consistent productive team. Black Cats earn the biggest blow out by pillaging a team that probably would have scored more if they had stayed at home. Cats win 117 - 36.

After the game F.Y.C. addressed the media before leaving the stadium.

"Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

Our match of the week was the top of the ladder clash between the Bilge Rats and the Guns of Hochuli. The Rats probably could have won this if they had bothered to start a RB and a TE that weren't on vacation, however, they did and that gave Coach Chad just enough room to garner the win. The win gives the Gunners sole possession of the league, and a half game lead over the Black Cats as the Gunners are already 2-0 within the division. If the Bilge Rats want to be considered a formidable force within the league, they are going to have step up the business. Gunners win 97 - 66.

In the bracket of having no business winning, what on earth did the Taipans do this week. After Thursday night the Taipans had used three players to amass the "huge" score of 16 points. The Taipans were staring down the throat of a third consecutive loss against Coach Michael, who set a new franchise record by starting 5 players on vacation or permanently disabled. Even with those players out, Michael's Team put up enough points to have our printing presses getting ready to run the biggest disaster story ever reported in the league. If the Taipans can't get a win when the opposition stay at home, maybe they need to be relegated to the NFL. Taipans get a win that they had no business receiving by defeating Michael 89-45.

So with a third of the season is complete, let's see where the teams lay.

The Guns of Hochuli own the league at this time with a 4-0 record. At 3-1, Sub Simmers divisional rivals the Bilge Rats and the Who Dat Nation are tied with the Black Cats. The Wild Boston Terriers, Helmand Nighthawks and the Australian Taipans are all tied at .500. Behind them the Mini Dead Poets get off the bottom of the ladder to advance to 1-3, while Michael's Team and the Green Beans fight out for first pick of the draft next year.

Next week we go back to the Black Cats lair as they go up against the Bilge Rats in our feature match. This game has the most intrigue as it plays out for a potential count back at the end of the season where these 3-1 teams are expected to meet. And we'll be there from the first kick on Thursday night to the last kneel down on Monday.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the effort of 10 receptions for 108 yards and 2 touchdowns, for a total of 32.40 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Jordy Nelson of the Mini Dead Poets, the Week Four MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

Gut Wrench
10-06-14, 11:18 PM
RECORD SCORE SPANKS TERRIERS...AGAIN.
107 point loss.

http://img1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20100914202008/simpsons/images/6/6c/Young_Ned_Spanking.jpg

Week 5 in the Subsim Fantasy League, and lookout. If you're playing the Wild Boston Terriers, expect to put up a record score. If you're playing the the 1-3 Mini Ded Poets, don't think that they will just lay down and die. And if you're thinking about nominating for this years Best of Subsim, don't let me stop you with the following suggestion.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM.

Let's start with the two biggest games in Australia last weekend, and the one important game that really mattered.

Once upon a time there was a foundation football club called South Sydney. Last weekend, the South Sydney club broke a hoodoo as they took their first Grand Final in 43 years. After the game, the cleaning crew came in and began the transformation for a Subsim Fantasy Football fantasy football game. The Australian Taipans were hosting the Wild Boston Terriers, which turned into nothing more than a bloodbath for the Taipans. Commissioner McBee started early with Aaron Rodgers (QB) and Randall Cobb (WR) on Thursday night, but it wasn't until the heat of Sunday that the Taipans showed they had teeth. After berating the Taipans in this column last week, they came out and served Australian justice until the mercy rule was invoked, and Victor Cruz (WR) was told he could only score single digit points. The Wild Boston Terriers for the second time this season, get served a league record score against them, and have plenty of time to think about it on the 17 hour flight home. Taipans serve notice as they destroy the Wild Boston Terriers 170 - 63.

Our match of the day this week was the Black Cats hosting the Bilge Rats. The Cats have been the "wannabe" team of the past few years, and the Bilge Rats are the "gonnabe" team of this year. This marquee game turned into one of the best highlight games of the past few years. The lead went back and forth between the two teams, with neither Coach able to extract dominance, and unable to put the opposition away. Late Sunday afternoon the Black Cats held a slight lead, which no one thought that could be surpassed by a kicker. Stephen Gostkowski, who appeared in the recent ESPN Sportcenter commercial ready to ask for more money, proved his value kicking 21 points and almost becoming the highest point scorer for the game. Having put the Bile Rats ahead, the Cat had no reserves left to play on Monday night, giving the Bilge Rats a win 104 - 93.

After the game Coach Wolfer addressed the media.

"Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

How about that team that looked to be going no where - the Mini Ded Poets. Don't tell Coach Mini that he's out of the playoffs.

After a couple of early losses, the Mini Dead's have put together two consecutive wins, this weekend's win against the Ghost like team of the Green Beans. Coach Chad has not been seen since the draft, but a W is a win no matter what. Mini Dead Poets advance to 2-3 and create a very interesting Surface Skimmers division, by defeating the Green Beans 101 - 50.

There are some teams you just know are going to be there at the end of the regular season. The Helmand Nighthawks are one such team, but when you start Julian Edeleman (WR) Rob Gronkowsi (TE) and the Bengals defense, a rookie selection mistake of playing your opposition has cost the Nighthawks a possible win. Edeleman only scored a paltry 6.75 points, but Gronk with a 100 yard receiving game and a touchdown scored 22 points. So much so, the Bengals defense scored -3. That one choice by Mister Chris to leave the Falcons (DEF) on the bench cost the Nighthawks 7 points. Coach Fuel For Blood and the Who Dat Nation played a close game needing just 3 points from Percy Harvin (WR) to win. Having scored those points early in the first quarter, Harvin did nothing else for the rest of the game, giving the Who Dat Nation a narrow win 108 - 105. That one rookie like error drops the Nighthawks to 2-3 and almost 5 positions in the ladder.

Having no problem at the top of the league ladder are the Guns of Hochuli. Business as usual was the name of the game as the Gunners hosted the bottom ranked Micheal's team. You couldn't get a bet on this game in Vegas the Gunners were so heavily favored. Team Ghost if they bothered to show up may have actually been able to win this won as the Gunners win by a smaller margin than everybody expected. Final score Guns of Hochuli 108 Micheal's Team 74.

Let's have a look at the ladder and see where the teams lay.

The Guns of Hochuli with their 5-0 record hold a one game lead over everybody, and a two game lead over the remainder of the Surface Skimmers division. Based on performance so far this year, the Gunners are only 3 wins away from a play off position.

(To soon to be talking about seeding?)

Behind them a squabble is going on. The Bilge Rats and the Who Dat Nation shared the divisional lead of the Sub Skimmers division at 4-1, and while the Bilge Rats are ahead on for and against, the Who Dat Nation has 3 divisional wins to the Rats 2. Both teams have a two game lead over the next divisional rival. Surface Skimmers divisional rivals the Black Cats and the Australian Taipans are the only league teams at 3-2. Behind them, the Wild Boston Terriers, Helmand Nighthawks and the rookie Mini Dead Poets are all at 2-3. Only the Wild Boston Terriers and the Nighthawks are expected to get above the .500% mark by the time the playoffs come around. Michael's Team and the Green Beans are still looking for their first win.

Next week we go home with the Guns of Hochuli as they host the Australian Taipans. The Taipans had a big win and the Gunners have had the least amount of points scored against them. With a chance to knock off the league leader and divisional rival, the Taipans have more to play for. Conversely, the Gunners can put their first divisional rival in a hole with a win and advance their lead over the division.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the effort of 479 yards and 4 touchdowns, for a total of 33.98 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Peyton Manning of the Australian Taipans, the Week Five MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

Gut Wrench
10-13-14, 10:58 PM
DOUBLE THRILLER.
And Monday Night final quarter rewrites.

http://www.yourmusicradar.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/mj-thriller-2-300x300.jpg

Week 6 in the Subsim Fantasy League, and if you were looking for a little pre-Holloween Thriller, you got it with the Guns of Hochuli and the Australian Taipans down to the wire, Hail Mary play on Monday night. Not enough action for you? How about we double the thrills with the a second helping of Mini Dead Poets and Nighthawks playing out one of the closest nail biting finishes (and of course, Monday night rewrites).

But before we scare the Fantasy Football pants off you, here's the most important thing you can do tonight.

DONATE TO SUBSIM .

On to the pretend football.

Let's start with one of the biggest shocks of this weeks games, as the Black cats host the Who Dat Nation. The Nation has been a power scoring machine in recent years, and any chance to get a win is a feather in your cap. The Black Cats came home after a two game road trip and really needed to show the Nation that the Cats truly are a team deserving of respect. And respect they got as they pounded the Nation. The Who Dat Nation struggled to score, only their Quarterback Andy Dalton reached double figures. While the Ravens (DEF) didn't put up a lot of points for the Black Cats, they did manage to keep to keep the Nations scorers on the sideline warming the bench. With time of possession in their favor, the Black Cats didn't even need to play Travis Kelce (TE) who was in Fiji on vacation. Cats trounce the Who Dat Nation, holding them to a pitiful 97 - 42 scoreline.

Last week, the Wild Boston Terriers were decimated in Australia, but not this week. This week they cam home, licked their....ummm, well you know where dogs lick, and set out to get their season back to .500%. Having the 0-5 Michael's team in town may have seen like a walk in the park, but Michael's team showed that they can keep pace with the dogs and score points, even if there is no one at the helm steering the ship. If they did have a skipper at the helm, they may have played two positions that didn't have guys on vacation, and give the doggies a swift kick. No, the Wild Boston Terrier put the bite on Michael, level out at 3-3 with a 94 - 69. win.

In a much calmer post game interview (compared to the previous week) Coach McBee addressed the media.

"Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

Maintaining an even race in the battle for the wooden spoon, Coach Chad and the Green Beans, a once proud franchise, now sits like a discarded burrito after a big night in Bangkok at 0-5. With no wins on the board, it was always going to be a difficult ask when the Bilge Rats come to town, and as it turned out, there was very little contest in it. Once again, with no one apparently at the helm, the Beans could have given the Rats a run for their money if they had bothered to substitute in two players. As it was, the Rats made a rookie mistake of playing both Gionvani Bernard (RB) and the Panthers (DEF), but the Beans were unable to take advantage and get their first win. Bilge Rats advance to 4-1 with a 119 - 82 win.

Our match of the day this week is the first of two thrillers. Entering this week, the Guns of Hochuli were the last remaining undefeated team at 5-0. You have to go back a long way to find a 6-0 team, so it was up to the Australian Taipans to put that streak to an end. Buoyed by their impressive scoring performance last week, you only needed to see the scheduled team on Thursday night to know that the Taipans may have let this one slip away with TY Hilton (WR) on the bench for 31 points. The Lions (DEF) stepped up for the Gunners and and abysmal failure of two of the Taipans wide receivers means that this game came down to the last quarter on Monday night. Needing just one touchdown to end the Gunners immaculate season, the Taipans were lucky to get one pass. Final score Gunners win a close game 128 - 120.

Our second thriller of the week was the Mini Dead Poets hosting the defending Torpedo Bowl champions, the Helmand Nighthawks. In a rare error, Mister Christ started Jamal Charles (RB) for the Nighthawks while Charles was soaking up the sun in Fiji. Playing one man short, the Mini's had a chance to steal this one away if just one of their players showed up. And show up Jordy Nelson (WR) did. Two weeks after winning the MVP, Nelson went for another 109 yards and a TD to give the mini's a chance of glory. On Monday night, the Mini's had to wait on the 49ers (DEF) before they knew the result of this one. A pick 6 with less than 60 seconds remaining gave the Mini's some breathing room. Mini Dead Poets steal one away from divisional rivals the Nighthawks, in a thrilling 92 - 78.

With six weeks completed lets have a look at what we know, the probables and the possibles.

At the bottom of the ladder, Sub Simmer divisional rivals the Green Beans and Michael's team sit at 0-6. One of those teams is guaranteed to advance to 1-6 next week as they meet each other. Without a miracle, or the appearance of their Coach, both teams will will be at the Torpedo Bowl, watching from the first batch of released seats. Put a fork in them, they are done.

The top of the ladder gets a little clouded and harder to decipher. The Guns of Hochuli and the Bilge Rats both lead their divisions. The Who Dat Nation and the Black Cats are second in their respective divisions at 4-2. Behind them the Wild Boston Terriers, Australian Taipans and Mini Dead Poets sit at a respectable .500%. The defending Torpedo Bowl champions the Helmand Nighthawks are at 2-4.

Next week we go home back to Oregon for a Sub Simmers Divisional game between the Who Dat Nation and the Bilge Rats. With just a game between these two teams, and the apparent lack of coaching in the 0-6 teams, the divisional matches play significant importance. This will also be no walk in the park either, as we begin to get down to the seeding process for the play offs. It looks to be one of the best match ups this year.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the effort of 8 sacks and 3 interceptions, for a total of 24 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present the Lions Defense of the Guns of Hochuli, the Week Six MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

ReallyDedPoet
10-14-14, 03:32 PM
Not Micheal Jackson :-o

Gut Wrench
10-20-14, 10:50 PM
CELLAR DWELLERS DECIDED.
Michael's team Gets First Win.

Week 7 in the Subsim Fantasy League, and the question has been asked. Can anyone stop the Guns Of Hochuli from going undefeated? Can the Australian Taipans get above .500% by scoring more points than anyone else in the league? Can either of the two cellar dweller ghost teams get their first win.

But the most important question that we need to ask, is...

HAVE YOU DONATED TO SUBSIM?

If the answer is no, then the second question is "why not"?

As you ponder all the poor reasons why you haven't, lets get to the less important questions of the week, which include who got up?

We'll start with our match of the day in Oregon where the Who Dat Nation hosted the Bilge rats. The Bilge Rats have stayed one game ahead of the Nation through the first six weeks, so this game was looking to be a record breaking crowd of attendance. And what a disappointment this turned into. The Who Dat Nation lead by Drew Brees (QB) threw for everything on the weekend, including throwing out two of the Bilge Rats starting RB. With two players off the field, the Bilge Rats never even looked like they were going to start, in no part hindered by their poor Defense (Panthers) who added a negative score. In a battle for the Divisional lead, the Who Dat Nation whop the Bilge Rats 117 - 56. The Nation and the Rats both finish the week at 5-2, but the Nation is 4-0 in the division.

The Battle for the Wooden Spoon was a highly contested affair between the Green Beans and Michael. Coach Chad of the Beans started two players on vacation, while Coach Michael started three on vacation. In a low scoring game, with a season high crowd attendance of 12, Coach Michael was able to give his team their first win, and leave the Beans at 0-6. Final yawn, I mean score, Michael's team defeat the Green Beans 50 - 45.

In his first address to the media all year, and ever, Coach Michael made a brief comment before heading off to celebrate with his teams fans...all 5 of them.

"Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

How about them Mini Ded Poets? In their debut season, the Mini have had a hot streak (of 3) on the run and were looking to make it four in a row against the Wild Boston Terriers. The Doggies have had their team up and down more often than a cocked leg, and this week, the leg was down. Lead by Aaron Rodgers (QB) the Terriers receiving corps performed well, but the RB's of Frank Gore and Justin Forsett did nothing. Well, they didn't actually do nothing, they score less than 6 points between them. Combined! Sensing the opportunity to steal a win away from a much stronger opponent, the Mini's sent in RB Eddie Lacey and Ahmad Bradshaw to put the Dogs away. Scoring over 31 combined points, the Mini Ded Poets topple the Wild Boston Terriers in an upset win, 102 - 94. The Mini's advance to a three way share of the Surface Skimmers Division at 4-3.

The other two teams in that three way were the Black Cats hosting the Australian Taipans. The Taipans have scored more points than anyone this season, and still sit at .500%. The Black Cats must have changed the program listing of their team a dozen times this week, swapping in and out QB's Joe Flaco, Jay Cutler, and RB's Ben Tate and Bishop Sankey. None of them were a very good choice this week as the Taipans put up yet another monster score to win 130 - 78. The win advances the Taipans to 4-3, and the divisional tie breaker against the Black Cats.

Can no one stop the Guns of Hochuli from running away with the regular season? This week it was up to the defending Torpedo Bowl Champions the Helmand Nighthawks to throw down the gauntlet and put stop to the madness of a potential 7 in a row. 7. The Gunners have been almost unstoppable, only having one close call. The Nighthawks however, are facing a horror season and with the Mini Ded Poets win, were facing a two game divisional deficit. The Gunners came out and with Demariyus Thomas scoring 33 points, just ran the Nighthawks out of town. Final score, Guns of Hochuli 126 Helmand Nighthawks 88.

At the midway point of the season, let's break down each team and where their divisional play off may lay.

Guns of Holchuli 7-0


The Gunners own the Surface Skimmers Division by two games, and the rest of the league by one game. The Gunners are two games short of earning a play off berth.

Who Dat Nation, Bilge Rats. 5-2


The Who Dat Nation holds the divisional tie breaker over the Bilge Rats. The Rats until this week, have played as the better team. One of these teams will win the division, the other will have to take their chances.

Australian Taipans, Black Cats, Mini Ded Poets 4-3


The race for the #4 seed will come from here. Only one team will make the Championship Series, and based on points scored, it will probably be the Taipans. The Cats stalled when they had the opportunity to get in front. The Mini Ded Poets were lucky to get this far, their luck runs thin in the next few weeks.

Wild Boston Terriers, 3-4.


The dark horse, the one team that can upset the entire league once they start getting back to playing football. With a guaranteed two wins aginst ghost teams, they are not yet eliminated.

Helmand Nighthawks


Our defending Torpedo Bowl Champions. Their season ends next week without a win. They play the Mini Dead Poets. One of these teams will be in a hole late Monday night.

Michael's Team, 1-6 and Green Beans, 0-6


Fodder for the rest of the league.

Next week, we go back to Australia as the Taipans host the Guns of Hochuli in our match of the week. The two teams met last week and the Taipans came within a snake's breath of winning. The Taipans have outscored everyone and may be the only team to out Gun Hochuli. On the other hand, a win to the Gunners will put them within a half game of a guaranteed play off position.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

There were a lot of players who could have had the award. Peyton Manning (Taipans) Demaryius Thomas (Guns of Hochuli) but this week, we went to honor one of the fighters in the league. For the effort of 3 receptions for 81 yards and 1 touchdown, for a total of 13.05 points and lifting them to their first victory of the season, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present the Torrey Smith of Michael's team, the Week Seven MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

Gut Wrench
10-27-14, 11:08 PM
IMMACULATE SEASON OVER.
Taipans Bite Gunners.

Week 8 in the Subsim Fantasy League, and the Gunners have been stopped from a clean sweep of the season. We'll tell you about their first defeat this year, and what it doesn't mean for the play offs. We'll talk (again) about that team that brings questions on whether they can win, and we'll talk about the big shoot out in Wembley.

But before we talk about anything, we have to talk about the most important thing you need to do today.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM?

Let's get to our match of the week, and it was thriller (with no Michael Jackson icon.)

Two weeks ago the Guns of Hoculi hosted the Australian Taipans in one of the best games of the year. The Taipans narrowly lost the game after having another player succumb to the All Injury team. This week was no different with the Taipans losing their sixth player for the season in the first quarter, with the injury to Brian Quick (WR). The Taipans started early on Thursday night with Peyton Manning (QB) but didn't look that convincing to win the game. The Gunners, made a rookie mistake when they played both Roddy White (WR) and Detroit (DEF) on their team. White's scored almost wiped points off the board, and Detroit scored only 4 points The Taipans played well through Sunday night but the Gunners had kept most of their starters in reserve for the Monday night game. It came down to late in the fourth quarter as the Gunners were closing in on a diminishing lead form the Taipans, when two disastrous events occurred - Tony Romo (QB) got injured and left the field and DeSean Jackson (WR) of the Taipans finally crossed for 100 yards. The points differential began to spread out again and as time ran out, the Taipans were able to inflict the Gunners with their first loss of the season. Taipans win a thrilling top of the table clash 121 - 101.

At the bottom end of the table, after getting their first win last week, Michael's team was looking to make it 2 in a row when they took on the Black Cats. The Cats have been the up and down team of the season, scoring big one week, sucking badly the next. And this week they sucked the worst. Scoring a paltry 64 points, with the huge contribution of 0 from Joe Flaco (QB) the Black Cats were lucky that they weren't blown out as Michael's team had two players out on vacation. Had they even bothered to suite up this week, the Cats would be looking at a game that they had no business winning. By the narrowest of margins, the Black Cats lose in overtime to the Michael's Team 68 - 64.

The other bottom of the ladder game was the Who Dat nation hosting the Green Beans. With a bead on first pick of next years draft, the Beans not only had three players not show up for the game, but a fourth show up and score no points. Who Dat Nation as expected blow out the Green beans 107 - 31.

How about 'dem Mini Dead Poets? The Mini's have been on a hot streak of 4 games and were looking to make it 5 when they hosted the defending Torpedo Bowl Champions, the Helmand Nighthawks. The Nighthawks are known for their high scoring offense, having had several of the leagues highest scores in the past few years. This year, the Nighthawks had struggled in the face of an opposition that has simply outscored them when the Nighthawks should have won. This was the third game where the Nighthawks have outscored everybody else in the league, and still come away with a loss. The Mini Dead Poets have powered through, and even though they left Ben Roethlisberger (QB) on the bench with 51 points, the Poets other mega stars including the Dolphins (DEF) stood up and showed what they could do, that they could topple the champions. In the wildest shoot out seen in years, stretching late into Monday Night overtime, the Mini Dead Pets run out winner 173 - 145.

Of note, had the Mini Dead Pets played the optimal team, the Mini Dead Poets would have scored a total of 194, a league all time record score. At the same time, if the Nighthawks had played their optimal team, they too would have scored a total of 172 points, which would have been a league all time highest losing score.

After the game, Coach Mini addressed the media at a turbulent press conference.

"Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

Proving that they are having another season where they score plenty of points, but still can't get to .500%, Coach McBee and the Wild Boston Terriers hosted the Bilge Rats in Oregon. The Rats are the upstart of the league, debutantes in the league, and are selling more Bilge Rats jerseys than all other teams....combined. The Terriers showed up and played well, Aaron Rodgers (QB) scoring 20 points and Randall Cobb (WR) scoring another 22. Their Running Backs however, scored less than 15 points an no touchdowns between them. That left the door open for the Bilge Rats, for while they struggled with Julius Thomas (TE) only scoring 3 points, otherwise matched and outscored the Terriers. The Bilge Rats power on and defeat the Wild Boston Terriers 152 - 118.

So after 8 weeks lets see where the teams lay.

In the Surface Skimmers Division, the Guns of Hochiuli lead at 7-1. The series with the Australian Taipans has been split at 1-1, and they trail the Gunners at 5-3. One other suprise team is also at 5-3, the Mini Dead Poets. The Black Cats are a game back at 4-4 and the Helmand Nighthawks, our defending champions, languish at 2-6.

In the Sub Simmers Division, both the Who Dat Nation and the Bilge Rats are 6-2, but the Nation not only holds a half game divisional advantage, they are also 5-0 within the division. The Wild Boston terrier sit three game back at 3-5, Michael's team at 2-6 and the Green Beans at 0-8.

Next week, we go back to Oregon as the two top teams in the league duke it out. The Who Dat Nation will be hosting the Guns of Hochuli. The Gunners after suffering their first defeat are within grasp of the Nation who would like nothing better than to snatch the league's #1 seeding from them. It promises to be a monumental affair.

Also next week, there will be a slight delay in the broadcast of the Subsim Fantasy League Reports, as the Associated Subsim Writers get together at the Meadowland on Monday night for a Giant celebration.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

There was no doubt which team was going to win the award this week, it was just a matter of which member of the team would win it. However, for orchestrating such a significant win, for the effort of 354 passing yards and 5 touchdown for 42.08 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present the Tom Brady of the Mini Ded Poets, the Week Eight MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

ReallyDedPoet
10-28-14, 06:50 AM
Nicely done as usual :up:

It was a tough Thursday-Monday for sure. If Romo knew how to, or better yet, made an attempt to change his protection schemes at the line of scrimmage, it may have been a different outcome for the Minis. May have given the Dallas Defence the boost the Nighthawks needed.

He just stood there with the Skins showing the blitz several times and did nothing but brace for the expected hit :dead::dead:

Gut Wrench
11-04-14, 12:04 AM
MINI DEAD POETS STREAK IS 6.
Gunners Loose 2nd in a Row.

Week 9 in the Subsim Fantasy League, coming to you live from the Press Box level of Metlife Stadium, although, with enough alcohol, I could get use to continue calling this "the Meadowlands". I sure can't call it a cauldron after a Giant failure tonight.

We'll talk about the biggest blow out of the week and what it means to the Mini Dead Poets. We'll find out if the Nighthawks had enough to sink the Bilge Rats, and we'll talk about whether one team has enough purr to make it to the play offs.

But before we talk about anything, we have to talk about the most important thing you need to do today.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM

Let's get to our match of the week, featuring the top of the table clash in Oregon of the Who Dat Nation and the Guns Of Hochuli. With the league lead on the line, the Gunners traveled after having tasted their first defeat. The Nation however, were on a two game winning streak and looking to make it a threesome. Teams were made, names were published, and then on early Saturday morning, Coach Casey changed three of the team to create a different look. The line in Vegas went up as the Gunners looked like the better team on paper. The match started early on Thursday with Who Dat Nation QB Drew Brees not having one of his best days. Having put up a paltry 13 point, it looked as though the Guns of Hochuli QB Nick Foles would surpass that in the first half. Not so fast Coach. After being taken from the field injured, the Gunners were without a replacement as their other QB (Tony Romo) was inactive for the day. Even with Alfred Morris (RD) and Demarius Thomas (WR) each scoring above 18 points, the Gunners were silenced by injuries. Asserting an Oregon domination, the Who Dat Nation hand the Gunners their second defeat, winning the game 140 - 98.

The second Oregon based team, the Wild Boston Terriers, have not been able to get any bite beyond their bark. This week it was an all animal affair against the Black Cats, who once again, look like they did just enough to get a win. The Black Cats on paper look purr-fect, but their end results has been less than spectacular. Still, if you're getting the win, does it really matter? Black Cats humble the Wild Boston Terriers 91 - 85.

Last week our defending Torpedo Bowl Champion was on the ropes, having been handed yet another defeat and reducing his season to 2-6. If there was any chance that the Nighthawks were going to be seriously considered for the play offs, they were going to have show it this week in one of the toughest matches of the year as they hosted the Bilge Rats. The Bilge Rats sitting half a game clear in their division were approaching a guaranteed play off position, but not any more. In this thriller game that went back and forth several times, it all came down to the Sunday night game. From 40 points in arrears, the Nighthawks slowly chiseled their way back into contention. The Bilge Rats, for what ever reason, sacrificed two playing positions by starting another two players on vacation. That one choice (which was actually two choices) probably cost the Rats the game, and drops them to 6-3. On Monday night, Nighthawks QB Andrew Luck put the icing on the cake to run out winners 145 - 107.

Mister Chris, with a smile on his face for the first time in weeks, spoke to media after the win.

"Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

Rookie Coaches seldom make it big in this league. First year jitters, hard felt loses, and grumpy old timers not giving them any respect. Respect? If it's respect you want you're gonna have to take it, and steal it the Mini Dead Poets did this week against the Michael's team. While not unexpected that they would get this win, it was how they got the win that mattered, with the highest score of the week. The win advances with Mini Dead Pets to their sixth straight win, and suddenly, no one is discounting that the Mini's can't play in the big league. Minis win 148 - 50.

In the other expected win of the week, the Australian Taipans sent their practice squad, and still beat the Green Beans 111 - 39. The gap would have been larger if the Taipans had a kicker who actually did something.

At the end of 9 weeks, let's look at the play off picture with what we do know.

The Green Beans at 0-9 have been eliminated from the Championship Series.

Michael's Team at 2-7 can't win the division, and have to hope for favorable results to make the Consolation Series.

The Helmand Nighthawks at 3-6 are the lowest ranked team in the Surface Skimmers Division only because they have had significantly more points scored against them than any other team. They need some help. Likewise, the Wild Boston Terriers with the same record, also need help, but the Terriers have two other divisional teams with losing records behind them.

Now to the play off picture that we don't know about.

There are 6 teams in contention for the 4 Championship Series positions. The Black Cats at 5-4 are the lowest rank, however, they cannot be discounted as the there are four teams within two games in the Surface Skimmers Division.

The Who Dat Nation and the Guns of Hochuli sit at the top of each of the two divisions at 7-2, a game clear of their nearest rival. The Nation has a better divisional win-loss record and currently occupy the #1 position. Behind those two teams, the Bilge Rats, Taipans and Mini Dead Poets sit at 6-3. Three weeks ago we were calling the Mini's as the outsider, that discussion has been turned around and they must now be considered a credible threat to claiming one of the Championship positions. The Taipans have scored more points than anyone else, while the Bilge Rats only have one divisional loss. It's too close to call on those three.

Next week, we're going to keep it a family affair as the Bilge Rats host the Mini Dead Poets. Will Wolfer's old age and treachery overcome the youthful exuberance of the Mini Dead Coach? Or will son just beat the snot out of Dad with a W.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For getting their team back into the win column, and the effort of 354 yards, 4 touchdowns and a huge amount of 5 rushing yards, for a total of 35.83 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present the Andrew Luck of the Helmand Nighthawks, the Week Nine MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

ReallyDedPoet
11-04-14, 07:17 PM
I have to admit Mini is impressing me. It's been hard to lay off the line-up and at times the waiver wire and let him continue to take the reigns. He has put me in my place :-(

Gut Wrench
11-10-14, 11:51 PM
WILDEST FINISH THIS YEAR.
Best football week in years.

Week 10 in the Subsim Fantasy League, and if you were looking for the best fantasy football game this year, it was this week. If you were looking for the biggest upset of the year, it was this week. And if you were looking to start seeding teams for the play offs, it was this week.

But before we look at anything, here's the most important message that you need to look into.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM

Last week we were talking about the family affair match up between the Bilge Rats and the Mini Dead Poets. And as we unknowingly predicted, the Mini's beat the snot out of their old man. Putting together an impressive winning streak of 7 games, the Mini Dead Poets have bragging rights around the Thanksgiving table after handing dear old Dad the biggest shellacking of the year. Even though Big Ben (QB) threw for 4 touchdowns than he did last week, the Mini played as a team, unlike the Bilge Rats who had two players on a bye and one out injured. If the Bilge Rats wanted to throw a game to help their son this was it, but the Bilge Rats have not been the powerhouse that they were appearing to be in the first few weeks of the year. They couldn't even start a Defense that scored positive points. Mini Dead Poets wallop the Bilge Rats 119 - 54 but more importantly, throw the Surface Skimmers Division wide open.

The Black cats drew Michael's Team this week, who had three players out on the bye. Black Cats win without even needing to shower at games end, 127 - 39.

Also looking a gift win in the mouth, the Helmand Nighthawks hosted the Green Beans. While having scored a lot of points, the Nighthawks have also become the team with the most points scored against them. Mister Chris leveled some of that inequity this week when they beat the Green Beans (who reached their highest score of the year) 115 - 86.

Best damm game of the year? Wild Boston Terriers hosting the Guns of Hochuli. Coach Casey and the Gunners look to be the power house team of the year, while Commissioner McBee can't catch a break...and this week was no exception. The Boston Terriers started slowing with Mohammad Sahu (WR) scoring just 3 points on Thursday night. On a weekend when the Terriers were going to need a lot of points, that single failure may have been the downfall of the Terriers. On Sunday the Gunners methodically went about business putting up a score, 35 points clear of the Terriers. Looking very comfortable in the lead, the Gunners relaxed, and allowed Aaron Rodgers (QB) to enter the field. In just 30 minutes, Rodgers (WBT) tore the Gunner apart for 6 touchdowns. 6. (Ben who?) Passing for more than 300 yards, the Wild Boston Terriers racked up 47.30 individual points, one of the largest seen in years. The Terriers had left the Gunners with a 30 point deficit for Monday. Enter Darren Sproles (RB) who returned a punt for a touchdown before rushing in for another himself. With QB Mark Sanchez throwing for over 300 yards, the Guns of Hochuli show that they can come from behind to snatch away a victory. One of the best games seen this year, the Guns of Hochuli narrowly win 125.34 - 115.6

The second of the double header in Oregon this weekend was the Who Dat Nation hosting the Australian Taipans. The Nation have shown that they can play football, on occasion, and this week were needing a win to take control of the division. The Taipans have had moderate success this year, but with some many players out injured or on a bye, the Taipans have to bring in fourth and firth stringers to make up the team. They may as well have left Andrew Holmes (WR) on the bench because he didn't score a point, leaving the Taipans needing a miracle on Monday night to make it. The Taipans fall short, losing to the Who Dat Nation 133 - 118.

After the game, amid talk of a play off appearance, Coach Fuel For Blood addressed SportCenter with the following statement.

"Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

At the end of 10 weeks, let's look at each team and where their future lies.

Last week the Green Beans were eliminated from the Championship Series. This week after recording their tenth loss in a row, they may as well start work on next season.

Michael's Team at 2-8 can also start work on next season, but not just yet. In the last 4 games, they play all 4 divisional opponents, the only one they may beat are the Green Beans.

The Who Dat Nation at 8-2 lead the Sub Simmers division by 2 games. They play Michael's Team next week, which should put them at 9-2 and 6-0 within the division. The Nation is almost assured a Championship seeding.

The Bilge Rats at 6-4 are 3 games ahead of their next divisional rival. They have the easiest path to the playoffs playing both the Green Beans and Michael's team. With those two wins, they can almost eliminate divisional rivals the Wild Boston Terriers from the Championship Series.

The Wild Boston Terriers are the most precarious of the Sub Simmers division. In the last 4 weeks they play 3 divisional rivals. Two of the games are against the Green Beans and Michael's team. The Terriers also play the the Mini Dead Poets. The Terriers need to win all 4 games to make the Championship, and that's only with some help.

In the Surface Skimmers Division it's a little more cloudy.

The Guns of Hochuli have three divisional games in the last four weeks. While they are 4-1 within the division, they are not yet assured a Championship seeding.

The surprise upstart Mini Dead Poets have to play both the Guns of Hochuli and the Australian Taipans still. In addition they must also play the Black Cats and the Wild Boston Terriers. The Poets have the toughest road schedule in the last 4 weeks.

The Australian Taipans have to play 3 divisional games and 1 game against the Green Beans. They are the only Surface Skimmer team to beat the Gunners so far, and can steal the Divisional Title away from them.

The Black Cats at 6-4 have the same record as the Taipans, but have to play all 4 divisional teams in the last four weeks, including, the Guns of Hochuli in the last week. The Cats have the hardest schedule in the last 4 weeks, and need to win all 4, and have some help, to make the Championship Series.

The Helmand Nighthawks at 4-6 are still mathematically viable for the Championship Series, but they have to go through both divisional rivals the Guns of Hochuli and the Australian Taipans. Their only saving grace is that they are the second highest scoring team. They also will need some help.

So that's where we are. 2 teams in the Sub Simmers Division and 4 teams in the Surface Skimmers Division with legitimate chances of making the Championship Series. But, as this is a fantasy football game, anything can happen, usually does, any given Sunday.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

After a couple of weeks where they have just put up some weak performances, this weeks winner more than showed that they have the toughness to play this game. For the effort of 14 rushing yards, 4 rushing touchdowns and 1 reception for 23 yards, for a total of 38.15 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Marshawn Lynch of the Black Cats, the Week Ten MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

Gut Wrench
11-17-14, 11:32 PM
WHO DAT CLINCH DIVISION.
Best football week in years.

Week 11 in the Subsim Fantasy League, and this week we start seeding for the playoffs. We'll have a look at the first team to clinch, and cast an evil eye over the next team expected to clinch a play off spot. We'll look at those teams facing elimination, and, we'll talk about the biggest scare of the year.

But before we look at anything, we need to look into the end of year Subsim Awards.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM

Wild results were the talk of the press box this week as some unexpected results have thrown open the run to the Torpedo Bowl. Teams who were expected to be championship contenders have floundered into fodder. Teams expected to be nothing more than a fill in have shown how to eliminate the defending champion. And, one team, with no coach, no cheer leaders, and no fans, have given the league the biggest heart attack.

Let's go the video tape.

Everybody, everybody, had the Wild Boston Terriers penciled in for a win this week against the Green Beans. Last week, the Wild Boston Terriers had the best game of the year. This week, they almost had to eat those words. The Beans, a once proud franchise, now sits like an anchorman's lunch in the bilge after a big night at Whiskey Pete's. Coach McBee ran out his team expecting the win to keep alive his slim chances of making it into the Championship Series. Last week's MVT, Aaron Rodgers (QB) did not disappoint racking up an impressive 30 points before the first round of drinks had been ordered. The Wild Boston Terriers look to be coasting to their fourth win of the season, and suddenly, everybody looked at the scoreboard and the Green Beans were ahead. And not just ahead, they were pulling away from the Dogs. The Beans, who have barely managed to show up each week, began crossing for touchdown, whereas, not one of the three WR or 2 RB's for the Dogs could get to the in-zone. By late Sunday night, the Beans had exhausted themselves and were a clear 9 points ahead with just the Wild Boston Terrier TE, Heath Miller to play. Miller, who had been quiet for the past few weeks, barely managed to get 5 catches, which eased the WBT past. Wild Boston Terriers get lucky, and catch a break as they defeat the Green Beans 88.67 - 86.14.

First team to clinch this year belongs to the Who Dat Nation. Sophomore year coach Fuel For Blood has an impressive 6-0 division record, as they met Michael's Team, the second ghost franchise operating this year. Although a low scoring game, the Who Dat Nation easily surpass a target to win 91 - 62. In so doing, the Who Dat Nation clinch the division, and will enter the Championship Series as either the #1 or the #2 seed.

The biggest challenge to the Who Dat Nation looks to originate from the Surface Simmers Division. The outside chance of winning the division are the Mini Dead Pet's who this week hosted the Australian Taipans. The Mini Dead Poets have put together the leagues longest winning streak this year of 7 back to back games. Poised against divisional rivals the Taipans, the Aussies looked to be little weaker than usual, with most of their starters on byes or injured. However, the Mini's showed up, passed the mark set by Vegas and avenged an earlier loss to the Taipans. The win by the Mini's move them within one game of the Surface Skimmers divisional lead. Poets win comfortably 124 - 97.

The Surface Skimmers divisional leaders are the Guns of Hochuli, which have looked to the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) as being the best team in the league. Until this week. The Gunners traveled to play against the Bilge Rats, who earlier in the season looked like being Championship contenders. Lately, the Rats have been anything but pretenders, and this weekend was no exception as Matthew Stafford (QB) scored negative points, Giovani Bernard (RB) didn't even make the team bus, and the entire team barely managed to score one touchdown. Gunners meet a weakened Bilge Rats and get an easy win, running out convincing winners 102 - 70.

After the game, knowing that the Sub Simmers Division had already been clinched, Coach Casey met the press.

"Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

Unannounced last week (but advertised in all the papers) was our Match of The Day with the Helmand Nighthawks hosting the Blacks Cats at Wembley. The Nighthawks, as defending Torpedo Bowl Champions, have struggled this year. While scoring enough points to win any other game in the scheduled week, thye have been narrowly defeated on a number of occasisons. This week, they were going to need the win against the Black Cats to stay in the divisional hunt. The Cats on the other hand, with the toughest last four games of the season, had a chance to leap frog up to two divisional opponents. The Black Cats, once again, started another player who was on vacation, and left the door open for the Nighthawks to capitalize. The Nighthawks only touchdowns came from Jamal Charles (RB) and in this league, you can't win without putting those TD's on the scoreboard. The Cats real effort came late Sunday when Jay Cutler (QB) and Alshon Jeffrey (WR) combined to score over 50 points between them. Leaving the game in the hands of their defense, the Packers (Black Cats) just out muscled the Lions (Nighthawks) to hand the Cats their third win in a row. Final score Black Cats narrowly defeat Helmand Nighthawks 104 - 100.

At the end of 11 weeks, with just three games to play, the play off picture is starting to gain shape at the ends, but the middle is a little fuzzy.

SUB SIMMERS DIVISION

Who Dat Nation 9-2
The Nation clinched the division with a 6-0 record. They enter the Championship playoffs as either the #1 or #2 seed. despite winning the division, they are not favorites to win the league. (Yet)

Bilge Rats 6-5
Three straight loses have dropped the Rats from the divisional race. They need to play well over the next three weeks or they will find themselves as the #6 seed in the Consolation Series.

Wild Boston Terriers 4-7
One more win and they assure themselves a Consolation Series appearance. They can still make the Championship Series if they win all three remaining games, and the Surface Skimmers Division implodes.

Michael's Team 2-9
One loss away from being eliminated from the playoffs. Expected to be eliminated.

Green Beans 0-11
Eliminated from the playoffs. Facing relegation for no appearance all season.

Let's have a look at the division which will decide the final seeding.

SURFACE SKIMMERS DIVISION

Guns of Hochuli 9-2
Only divisional loss to the Taipans means they haven't yet clinched the Division. On the border of taking the #1 or #2 seeding in the playoffs. Favorite to win the Championship.

Mini Dead Poets 8-3
Dark horse of the league, currently playing spoiler in the division. Too close to call if they will play in the Championship Series or the Consolation Series.

Black Cats 7-4
The hardest schedule in the last four weeks. Will probably end up as the #5 team in the Consolation Series. Their results will decide the Divisional Champion.

Australian Taipans 6-5.
A loss this week may have forgone the division. Highest scoring team this year. Looking to finish the season battling either the Black Cats or the Mini Dead Poets for a Championship Series seeding.

Helmand Nighthawks 4-7
Defending Torpedo Bowl Champions facing elimination from the Championship series. Needs to win next three games and have a lot of help to avoid Consolation Series.

With that all done, where does that leave us to pick next week's game? We go home to the Mini Dead Pets as they host the Black Cats. Divisional rivals playing against each other with a Championship Series appearance on the line - it just doesn't get any better than that.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the first time in Subsim history, we have our first team to win this award in back to back weeks. For the effort of 13 sacks, 2 interceptions, 2 fumbles recovered, and 2 defensive touchdowns, for a total of 26 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present The Green Bay Packers Defense of the Black Cats, the Week Eleven MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

CaptainHaplo
11-18-14, 12:54 AM
I needed the two in a row MVT. I was projected to lose this week by 40+ points! Man I was sweating.

Looks like I need to earn it for 4 more weeks!

Gut Wrench
11-24-14, 11:50 PM
SEEDING NIGHTMARE BEGINS.
Surface Skimmers Division Undecided.

Week 12 in the Subsim Fantasy League, and this week , as the positions for the play offs become clearer, we'll start seeding where most teams could end, or how far they may fall. We'll look at what's become of our defending champion, what's become of our newest rookie, and we'll tray a pick a game that looks to be the best game, in what is, the longest week of football.

But the most important thing you need to do right now, yes right now, is the following. (too subtle?:D )

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM

Let's get down to business and start with the Bilge Rats hosting Michael's Team. The Rats came into the league as debutantes this year and immediately set the league on fire. They went out and won their first three games, before being handed their first loss by the Guns of Hochuli. At the mid way point of the season they were 5-2 and looking like Championship Series contenders. Looks can be deceiving, as they hosted Michael's Team in week 12. Michael's Team have been a remnant ghost, but they do have wins. They have beaten the other ghost team twice, and got that shock win against the Black Cats in week 8. Well, in week 12, they've done it again. In what should have been a sure fire win for the Rats, they started 2 players and their Defense, who were both on holidays in Ferguson, Missouri. In all fairness. Coach Michael also benched three of his starters, and it became a 5 on 5 game. The Rats were sent scurrying with their tails between their legs as Michael's team ran out winners 93 - 51. With three wins under their belt, fans are left to wonder what could have been had Michael's team shown up.

After the game, with their Coach no where to be found, some flunkie from the hotel where the team stayed addressed the media in a prepared statement. He said "Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

Michael's Team advances to 3-9 with profound implications, Bilge Rats play themselves out of a Championship Series and drop to 6-6.

In other game which didn't really involve one team showing up, the Australian Taipans whopped the Green Beans 141 - 71 The Green Beans local media must have known the result of this game before it began - they didn't even bother to show up and film it, instead, opting for the "much closer" Bills and Jets game. Apparently, the Taipans had an impressive catch, that no body saw.

http://sports.cbsimg.net/images/blogs/odell-beckham-catch-11232014.jpg

Taipans advance to 7-5 while the Beans stay win less at 0-12.

Our match of the day this week was the Mini Dead Poets hosting the Black Cats. This game has been sold out for weeks, as the Poet's fans rise and watch their expansion team put up a 9 game winning streak. The longest winning streak in the league, the Mini's are in a cut throat battle, coming from an 0-3 start, to be Championship Series and possibly Division winners. With Tom Brady (QB) at the helm, the Mini's only put 3 touchdowns on the board, but it was the combination of Emmanuel Sanders (WR) and Eddie Lacey (RB) who collectively combined for over 270 all purpose yards. The Cats player selection committee must have been purring this week as they left Joe Flacco (QB) and Steve Smith Snr (WR) on the bench, and instead started Jay Cutler (QB) (6 points) and Dwayne Bowe (WR) (5 points). The Cats have had a season where losing two close games (Week 1; Guns of Hochuli -.66 points, Week 8; Michael's Team -4 points) may have cost them a run at the Divisional Win. Final score this week wasn't close as the Poets scratch out the Cats 130 - 73. Poets look like a strong team as they advance to 9-3, Black Cats drop back a game into a tie at 7-5.

Let's turn to the local Oregon Derby where the Wild Boston Terriers were hostng the Who Dat Nation. The Nation had already wrapped up the division last week, and are only playing for top two seeding. The Doggies however, after another frightful season where they have been outscored mercilessly, were still in the hunt for a Championship position, if the planets aligned correctly. The Nation started slowly, but as we have seen in recent weeks, once they get Fuel for Blood, they start motoring. The Terriers lead most of the way through until Sunday afternoon, but it was not until Monday with the postponed game, that the Nation's Bills (DEF) showed up and gave them the lead. With three of their players billed for Monday night, the Nation leaped ahead, despite a valiant effort by the WBT RB Justin Forsett (135 + yards) to stay in the game. Who Dat Nation easily account for the Commissioner, sending him and the Dogs packing, with a final score of 148 - 92.

That just leaves us with the final game of the year at home for the Helmand Nighthawks as they host the Guns of Hochuli. The defending Torpedo Bowl Champions were holding on to the last vestibules of an appearance to defend their crown, that was pretty much snuffed out by Sunday afternoon. The Nighthawks started their week early and declared their innings at lunchtime Sunday with a 50 point lead. It was a three way between Tony Romo (QB) Demiryus Thomas (WR) and Demarco Murray (RB) which dragged the Gunners back into the game, eventually giving them the lead. The Gunners win at Wembley 119 - 99 moves them to 10 - 2, while the loss, sadly, puts our defending Torpedo Bowl Champions, on the wait list for tickets to the Torpedo Bowl at 4-8.

At the end of 12 weeks, with just two games to play, the play off picture is a little clearer, but in the longest week of the year, get ready to muddy the waters.

SUB SIMMERS DIVISION

Who Dat Nation 10-2
The Nation already clinched the division. They're keeping an eye on the Surface Skimmers Division to find their final seeding.

Bilge Rats 6-6
The fourth straight loss and the fat lady is starting to sing on the Rats appearance in the Championship Series. They need to beat both divisional leaders, and have help to make an appearance.

Wild Boston Terriers 4-8
Play Michael's team next week, which may not be a "gimme" win. One of two teams in danger of missing out on a play off appearance, to a ghost team.

Michael's Team 3-9
Singing the Bee Gees hit - Staying Alive. An unexpected win keeps them alive for the Consolation series, and now endangers two other teams from elimination, including the defending Torpedo Bowl Champions.

Green Beans 0-12
Already selling off team assets for the year.

On the other side of the league, it's a much closer race.

SURFACE SKIMMERS DIVISION

Guns of Hochuli 10-2
Their only divisional loss to the Taipans means they still have not yet clinched the Division. Is assured a Championship Series seeding, but, their number is still to be decided.

Mini Dead Poets 9-3
Debutanteson the cusp of winning the division, lock stock and potentially, the #1 seeding. At the same time, they could fold under the pressure and drop back 3 positions into the Consolation Series. Has the most to win, and lose.

Australian Taipans 7-5
Currently #4 seed for the Championship Series, but not a lock in. They still have to play two divisional teams before their fate is known. Has scored more points than any other team so will win the count back if required.

Black Cats 7-5
The hardest schedule in the last two weeks. May end up playing for the #4 seed in the last week if they can get around their up and down form.

Helmand Nighthawks 4-8
Defending Torpedo Bowl Champions eliminated from the Championship series. On the bubble for elimination from the Consolation Series.:o

Wow. No one would have picked the Nighthawks to be facing play off extinction this year.

Now that we know where everybody lays, and what's on the line, it's time to pick our match of the week. This was a tough call. Do we pick the Who Dat Nation hosting the Helmand Nighthawks who face elimination? Should we go with the the Wild Boston Terriers facing the nothing team of Michael, who stand between them and any appearance? Who about the Bilge Rats who no longer certain to win against the win less Green Beans? Or maybe we should go for the divisional fight between the Taipans and the Black Cats?

No, we went with a game that we couldn't have scripted any better. In the longest week of football, we go home with the Guns of Hochuli as they host their one game behind divisional rivals, the Mini Dead Poets. Both teams can still win the division, but this game will decide the count back. It's the #1 and #3 teams in the league fighting it out, to decide who is guaranteed a Championship Seeding.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the first time this season, we have our first repeat winner of this award. For the effort of 4 touchdowns, a 2 point conversion and 257 passing yards, for a total of 30.54 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Peyton Manning of the Australian Taipans, the Week Twelve MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

Gut Wrench
12-01-14, 11:34 PM
WEEK 13 - UNLUCKY FOR...EVERYONE
4 Underdogs get the win.

Week 13 in the Subsim Fantasy League, the longest week of the year, as it turns out, producing the most startling results we've seen this year. With just two week to go in the regular season, you would think that by now, the favorites could get their act together, seed themselves and win their mismatched game? In some cases, it wasn't even close - in others, there was barely a score to decide the winner.

But in all things, Weeks 13 has done exactly what the previous 12 weeks hadn't done - muddled up the final seedings until the last week. We'll tell you all about it, right after this very important message.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM

Oh the carnage, where do we start? Roll the tape.

Not with our match of the week, which was the only game where the favorite was able to keep their respect. The Guns of Hochuli were hosting the Mini Dead Pets this week in the Gunners final home game. The Mini Dead Poets were on a nine week winning streak and were looking to turn that into double figures, and challenge for the Divisional Title. The Gunners, had other ideas. Gunners QB Tony Romo choked on a Thanksgiving Turkey delivering a negative score, ably assisted by Roddy White (WR) who did nothing. It was left to the running back Demarco Murray to steady the ship as he started with a 19 point score. Having lead most of the way through the early weekend, the Mini's had stacked their team in the late Sunday game, and came storming on the back of CJ Anderson for 168 yards. In a mid ranging scoring game, the Mini Dead Poets were unlucky not to flog the Gunners who started both Romo (QB) and the Eagles (DEF). The Poets ran out of fuel late Sunday and just didn't score enough points to topple the league ladders. Guns of Hochuli defeat Mini Dead Poets 93 - 87 and clinch the Divisional Title with other results.

Now onto the shock losses this week and let's start with the biggest upset at home as the Bilge Rats hosted the Green Beans. The Beans have been blah team all year, that was until this week when they finally welcomed back Calvin Johnson (WR) to the scoring field. Bilge Rats QB Matthew Stafford passed for a monstrous 390 yards and Leshon McCoy (RB) went for over 159 yards, but they could not carry the team on the back the whole week. In the last few weeks, the Bilge Rats have strung together 5 losses and choked away any appearance in the Championship Series. Green Beans get their first, well deserved win of the season, stomping the Bilge Rats 132 - 109.

The Wild Boston Terriers were the second team to fall this week when they hosted Michael's team. Michael's Team, despite the fact that their coach hasn't even shown up for practice, has somehow managed to get three wins this season. The Wild Boston Terriers, facing the prospect of a shock elimination from the playoffs, even with their star Aaron Rodgers (QB) throwing for 368 yards, could not stop Michael's Team piling on 7 touchdowns - and that's with one player still on vacation in Walmart in Ferguson, Missouri. Michael's team plays out for a year long high score and go on to beat the Wild Boston Terriers 128 - 133. The loss drops the Terriers out of a play off position, and they must now wait for a favorable results to make the playoffs, having almost been eliminated by a Ghost team.

And ghosts were probably the only attendees at the Black Cats hosting the Australian Taipans and their low balling game. The Cats started with a bear rush on Thursday as Alshon Jeffrey (WR) scored 24 points, but after that, just turned into a whimper. The Taipans ran onto the field at the same time and midway through Thursday, this was looking like a walk in the park for the Australians. Had they bothered to score touchdown or if their franchise player Peyton Manning (QB) did anything after the first quarter, this may not have become the snooze fest that it was late into Sunday night. In one of the lowest winning scores this season, the Black Cats get another win they were undeserving of, as the Taipans just crash and burn. Final score Black Cats barely slither past the Taipans 85 - 81.

After the game, knowing that their play off chances had taken some improvement, Coach FYC met the press with a big Cheshire Cat grin. "Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

With all the uncertainty of this weeks games, one thing that was for certain were that the Helmand Nighthawks, our defending Torpedo Bowl Champions, were going to explode somewhere. And explore they did in Oregon when hosted by the Who Dat nation. Sitting at the top of the Sub Simmers Division, the Who Dat Nation are only playing for seeding. The Nighthawks, having suffered embarrassment this year, have slowly stormed back to be the highest scoring team in the league. And high score they did this week thumping the Nation with double digit individual scores for all but one player. The Nation, playing for the #1 seeding, should have taken the lowest ranked team in the Surface Skimmers division, but when Jimmy Graham (TE) doesn't register a catch, you just lost a winning scoring. Nighthawks soar over the Nation 153 - 122.

At the end of 13 weeks, with just one games to play, the play off picture is almost complete. We'll look at at each of the seeding positions and see who can and who can't get into the picture.

CHAMPIONSHIP SEEDING

#1 and #2 The Guns of Hochuli and the Who Dat Nation have won their division. The Gunners are 11-2 while the Nation is 10 -3. The Nation can only take the #1 seeding if they win aginst the Bilge Rats and the Gunners loose.

#3 Mini Dead Poets.
A win or a loss is not going to change their seeding. They have scored significantly more points than the Black Cats, they will win any countback.

#4 The only Championship seeding being disputed. The Black Cats sit at 8-5 and play the Guns of Hochuli next week. They carry their own destiny. They can only be challenged by the Australian Taipans at 7-6. The Taipans play the Helmand Nighthawks, and if they Taipans win, and the Cats loose, the Taipans will earn the countback and steal the #4 seed.


CONSOLATION SEEDING

#5 and #6 A loss by the Taipans will automatically drop them back into the Consolation series. The Bilge Rats need a win against the Who Dat Nation to challenge. The Rats can't advance any further.

#6 and 7 The Helmand Nighthawks have scored more points than anyone and will win the count back against all other teams. The Bilge Rats will fill the other position with a loss.

#8 Michael's Team and the Wild Boston Terriers are equal at 4-9. A win by Michael's team against the Green Beans ensures that their ghost team appears in the play offs. The Wild Boston Terriers have to beat the Mini Dead Poets, and have Michael's team lose, to go to the count back. The Terriers win the count back.

ELIMINATED

#9 The Wild Boston Terriers are Michael's team are fighting to avoid the first eliminated position.

#10 The Green Beans have secured the second eliminated position.

Where, oh where do we go for our match of the week? Do we take the Taipans hosting the Nighthawks on their longest away trip of the year? Do we take the nothing game of Michael's Team and the Green Beans which may decide the Terriers future? Do we take the Who Dat Nation and the Bilge Rats who have nothing to play for?

No, we go back to the continuous states to watch the Black Cats hosting the Guns of Hochuli,for championship Seeding, and ironically, both teams may end up meeting each other again the following week in the first game of the play offs.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the effort of 6 sacks, 3 interceptions, 2 fumbe recoveries, 1 defensive touchdown, and 0 points scored against them, for a total of 37 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Rams Defense of the Green Beans, the Week Thirteen MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

ReallyDedPoet
12-02-14, 08:17 AM
:/\\!!

Told Mini to go with Witten over Fleener, that was the difference.

I have a feeling Witten will be getting a few splinters in his ass the next few weeks....

Gut Wrench
12-09-14, 12:01 AM
PLAY OFF SEEDINGS
The Nightmare of Week 14

Week 14 in the Subsim Fantasy League, and if you were getting tabs of the play off seedings during the weekend, you probably crossed out, eliminated and reinserted multiple teams into multiple positions. It has been a week of jockeying, hopes and despair, as we finally get down to the final four, and four more who will play off as also rans.

It will take a bit to work this one out, as we have our second week of the year, where results and playoffs hung in the balance until the final quarter of Monday night. So while we wait for the rewrite to come out, here's something to keep you occupied for a few more minutes.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM

Week 14 - here we go, as the Associate Subsim Writers (ASW) take this apart game by game, player by player, and after all is said and done, still have to look at the rules of reseeding to work out the countback.

Let's start with what we know, and work our way around the play off possibilities one by one.

Green Beans hosted Michael's Team. The Beans had earned the right to first pick of the draft next year with only one win. They were only playing for pride, and maybe a kick in the pants for not showing up this year. Into town came Michael's Team, another team that had also not shown up for the year, but, shocking as it may be, still had playoff possibilities. Beans quarterback Cam Newton finally showed up passing for three touchdown and running for another. Having set a extraordinarily high score (for a ghost) Michael's team probably could have made a game of it had they bothered to start three players currently on injured reserve. Beans show up in the final game of the regular season to trounce Michael, 122 - 96. The win by the Beans does nothing for them as they finish the season in 10th place. The loss by Michael's team, however, opens the way for the Wild Boston Terriers to gain some respect in the Consolation Series.

The Wild Boston Terriers have had another diabolic year where they clearly have to be the unluckiest team on the planet. Having score a respectable tally of points, they have suffered at the hands of record breaking scores. At 4-9 the Terriers were playing for some semblance of respect, and hoping that they could make the playoffs ahead of one of the ghost teams. Pitted against the best rookie team seem in the league, the Mini Dead Poets rode into town still smarting after losing one game and missed grabbing a ten game winning streak. The Mini's were guaranteed a play off spot but their final seeding would in part depend on this and other games. The Doggies lay all their hope in the Green bay trio of Aaron Rodgers (QB) Randall Cobb (WR) and Mason Crosby (K). Unfortunately, the Mini Dead Poets also had Jordy Nelson (WR) so this game needed to be close before we even got to Monday for a decision to be made. It wasn't. Between Tom Brady (QB) and CJ Anderson (RB) combining for over 40 points, it was also going to be a tough haul for the Dogs as their wide receivers, tight end and running backs, once again, failed to score more than one touchdown. Mini Dead Poets run out convincing winners 123 - 102. The win by the Mini's locks them in as the number #3 seed, but the loss puts the Wild Boston Terriers into the first count back of the week.

Our match of the week was the Who Dat Nation hosting the Bilge Rats. The Bilge Rats have been out to seas for the past five weeks as they have succumbed to a string of losses. The Who Dat Nation, having demolished their own division 8-0, were in the fight for the #1 seeding. And a fight it turned into with 7 players form the nation scoring single digit points. T'was good that Le'Veon Bell showed up this week and managed to put some respect into the potential #1 seed score. The Bilge Rats, with nothing to play for other than the decision of which team from the Surface Skimmers division they might meet, laid down and died. Final score, Who Dat Nation limp home in a scare 96 - 92, and have to sit out other games to work out where their final seeding is.

After the game, waiting on other results for their final seeding, Coach Fuel For Blood met the press and a horde of strippers. "Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

Downunder, the Australian Taipans were hosting the Helmand Nighthawks on their longest road trip of the year. The Nighthawks have scored more points then anyone else this year, and the Taipans hold second place - and yet, both these teams are at .500% or below. This was always going to be shoot out. The Nighthawks were guaranteed a Consolation Series appearance but their seeding and potential opposition in week 15 were going to depend on this weeks games. The Tapians started early on Thursday night and looked in good shape. In a bold move Coach Pioneer stacked almost the remainder of their team into early Sunday games, so they could go to Papa John's for pizza. Peyton Manning, their QB was relegated to holding down the fort in the afternoon, and got mighty upset, throwing a temper tantrum and handing the Taipans a negative QB score. The Nighthawks, systematically played throughout the weekend, and continued to steam roll forward. After seeing Peyton's temper tantrum, it was just a matter of Julio Jones (WR) going for a stroll of 259 yards to win the game. Nighthawks win 150 - 127 and eliminate the Taipans from the Championship Series.

That leaves us with just one game to report on, and it was probably the best game of the weekend. The Black Cats were hosting division leaders the Guns Of Hochuli. The Gunners had only lost one divisional game to the Taipans, and were looking to secure the #1 seeding. The Cats, have had a couple of wins they were probably lucky to get, but, this is fantasy football - you get those wins anyway you can. And here's how the Cats did it. The Gunners came out Thursday night and racked up 75 points before the Cats even got started. And that's where the Gunners run into the wall. The Gunners were barely able to muster an additional 25 points, while the Black Cats were able to put some of those "lucky" cat wailing calls to bed as they clawed their way back into the game. And crawl they did, overcoming a 60 point deficit and putting enough points on the board to bring question to the Gunners ability to win the series. Black Cats get perhaps the most unpredictable win of the season as they halt the Guns of Hochuli march, 122 - 109.

The regular season ends at week 14, but before we go anywhere, it's into the rule book as we go through the count back procedures. We'll go through this series by series, as we go down the line and work out who's in, who's not, and what happened.

CHAMPIONSHIP SEEDING

#1 and #2 The Guns of Hochuli and the Who Dat Nation finish the season as clear division leaders. They have been the two form teams of their divisions, but their divisional games will decide their fate. The surprising loss of the Gunners in the final week drops them to 6-2 in the division. The Who Dat Nation, at 8-0 within the division, take the #1 seeding, and drop the Guns of Hochuli to #2. The Mini Dead Poets could neither advance nor descend in the final week, and they lock up the #3 position. The Black Cats do the impossible, and beat out two divisional opponents in the last two weeks, including the divisional leader, to secure the #4 seed.

CONSOLATION SEEDING

A late season slump of two losses eliminates the Australian Taipans from the Championship Series, and as the only team at .500%, they secure the #5 seed. The win by the Nighthawks over the Taipans put them level at 6-8 with the Bilge Rats. The Nighthawks having scored more points than anyone else, secure the #6 seed and relegate the Bilge Rats to #7. The Wild Boston Terriers and Michael's Team both end the regular season at 4-10, but the Dogs have scored almost 40% points than ghosts. Wild Boston Terriers scrape into the Consolation Series on countback as the #8 team.

ELIMINATED

Michael's Team and the Green Beans are rightfully eliminated.

THE PLAY OFFS

The playoffs begin in earnest next week as the final four sought it out for Torpedo Bowl, and the other four sort out the also rans bragging rights.

The #1 seed the Who Dat Nation will host the Black Cats in Oregon. The two teams only met once in week 6 where the Cats pummeled the nation 97 - 49.

The #2 seed the Guns of Hoculi host the Mini Dead Poets. These two teams met twice and the Gunners took both matches by less than 10 points each.

In the Consolation Series, our first games are overseas. The #5 Taipans wait for the #8 Wild Boston Terriers to make the long trek to Australia. The Taipans put a 100 point beating of the Terriers in week 6.

The second international game of the Consolation Series has the Helmand Nighthawks hosting the Bilge Rats. The Nighthawks and Rats only met once during the regular season where the Nighthawks put a 40 point beating on the rats in week 9.

Next week, well be there as we still try to sort out the Torpedo Bowl. The Las Vegas bookies are betting on a Who Dat Nation and Gunners final, but there is a lot of interest in a Mini Dead Poet and a Black Cat final. Could the Mini's do the almost impossible, and win the league in their debut year? If they do, they'll have to do it the hard way through some very tough teams. And we'll be there for every game to give you the high and low lights.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the effort of 185 yards, 2 rushing touchdowns, 6 receptions for 50 yards and a receiving touchdown, for a total of 40.75 points, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Le'Veon Bell of the Who Dat Nation, the Week Fourteen MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

ReallyDedPoet
12-09-14, 09:06 PM
Another great one, post that is :yep::up:

Gut Wrench
12-15-14, 11:45 PM
BOWL BOUND
Who Dat Clawed By The Cats

Week 15 in the Subsim Fantasy League, the first week of the playoffs. This is the week where, traditionally, those teams that barely scraped in, tend to fall off the grid. And those teams that should have been in, blow up the scoreboard.

But before we do anything else, do you see that post right above this one? The one where ReallyDedPoet says this is a great thread? Time is running out....you don't want Santa to miss your house because you were a bad bad boy, do you?

No?

THEN NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM

Ok, on with the recap.

Green Beans and Michael's Team headed to Scooby Doo Mystery Island, where they met Batman and Robin and solved that riddle that the old lighthouse keeper was scaring people away from a gold mine.

http://media.giphy.com/media/SpZQKqB6SsBig/giphy.gif


And now the really important games, let's take them apart from the bottom of the ladder.

In the Consolation Series, the first of the two international games were played in Wembley. Mister Chris and the Helmand Nighthawks were hosting the Bilge Rats. The Nighthawks had won the count back as the highest scoring team in the league, whereas the Bilge Rats....I don't know....played like world beaters for the first six games then sucked like the Raiders for the last six. (Sorry Neal.) And their suckiness continued into the playoffs. (Again, sorry Neal.) The Bilge rats passed for one lousy touchdown, and their entire team of 3WR, 2RB and a TE weren't even good enough for one TD. The Bilge Rats were saved by their DEF, (Panthers), who was their second top score. The Nighthawks, while they didn't light up the board as they did last week, score enough points to walk away winners 95 - 77. The Nighthawks would wait on the winner of another international game in the southern hemisphere, before traveling.

Before we get to the second game, it cannot go without passing, that all of the Associated Subsim Writers, (ASW) offer condolences to Australians everywhere. It got uncharacteristically quiet with Australians around the world as the Sydney incident unfolded. Our prayers go out to those who suffered, and those left behind.

The Australian Taipans were hosting the Wild Boston Terriers, visiting from Oregon. These two teams met in week 6 where the Taipans put a 100 point shellacking on the Terriers. Though not as significant this week, the Taipans made it two from two, even with the failure of their star first round draft QB, Peyton Manning. Even with that opportunity, the Terriers QB Aaron Rodgers could not capitalize, scoring only .55 points himself. Taipans beat the Terriers 131 - 82.

Onto the Championship Series.

In the final week of the regular season, the Guns of Hochuli faltered and dropped to the #2 seed on a divisional count back record. Having said that, the Gunners have been red hot favorites to win the Torpedo Bowl since about week 5. In the first of two Championship Series games, the Gunners were hosting the Mini Dead Poets. The Mini's were the fan favorite of the year, stringing together nine straight wins to muscle their way into the Championship bracket, in their debut season. Old age and treachery often overcome youth, and this week, Coach Casey showed the Mini's just how it's done. While no one member of their team stood out, it was a unified effort on behalf of the Gunners that saw them very methodically stretch out to a small lead. The Mini's were still mathematically in the hunt on Monday night with Kenny Stills (WR), but each time he touched the ball, he was countered by the Gunners TE Martellus Bennett. Gunners take care of business and book themselves the well deserved Torpedo Bowl appearance downing the Mini Dead Poets 106 - 74.

After the game, feeling very confident, Coach Casey met the press for a rather smug interview. "Yeah, we played hard, knowing how important this game was. We played it hard and we're grateful just to come away with the win and look forward to next week."

If you had booked your airfare weeks ago to the Torpedo Bowl trying to get ahead of the rush, you were in for a mighty scare this week. In Oregon, the Who Dat Nation, the #1 seed in the league was hosting the Black Cats. The Cats had a couple of wins throughout the year that I think they were lucky to get, but it doesn't matter how you get them if it gets you to the Championship bracket. But the aim of the game is to get to the Championship game. The Cats were ready to play and made a statement with Dez Bryant scoring 3 touchdowns for 34 points. The Nation, if they were going to win this, were going to have come from a long way from behind. And a long way they came from, down by more than 29 points, Drew Brees (QB) made a superhuman effort to throw for over 300 years, but they were still going to need touchdowns. He passed for three touchdown, but really needed to pass for 4. In a nail biting thriller which kept both the ASW presses off line, and everybody waiting to buy airfares, the Who Dat Nation scored a running TD with 1.47 remaining to get in the Torpedo Bowl. Then, the Black Cats WR Alshon Jeffrey caught a TB with 30 seconds to go to regain the lead. (And thereby caused the second entire rewrite of this column). Black Cats upset the Nation, and book their ticket to the Torpedo Bowl, defeating the #1 seed 131 - 125.

CHAMPIONSHIP SEEDING

After an upset victory, the #2 seed Guns of Hochuli host the # 4 seed Black Cats for the Torpedo Bowl. These two teams only met two weeks ago where the Cats beat the Gunners and squeaked into the Championship on an unlikely series of victories. Their unlikeliness continues, and the question now asks, can the Cats scratch out one more victory against the powerful Gunners?

In the second game of the Championship Series, the Who Dat Nation get to host another game against the Mini Dead Poets. Regardless of the outcome of this game, the Mini's have shown that a rookie can come to play, and show show some guts.

CONSOLATION SEEDING

A repeat of a game also two weeks ago, the Helmand Nighthawks get to make the long long trek to Australia to play the Taipans. These two are the top scoring teams in the league, so this promises to be a shoot out. Interesting, this year, the Taipans are 0-2 against the Nighthawks.

In the final game of the Consolation Series, somebody throw Coach McBee a life preserver. He needs one after having a dismal year. The non appearance of the Bilge Rats in the past 6 weeks would suggest that the Wild Boston Terriers are the clear favorites, but this year, that tag has not worked for the Doggies.

The match up between the Gunners and the Black Cats is the most intriguing Torpedo Bowl combination that could be found. The Cats finished the regular season at 9-5, peaking at the right time over three of the best teams in the league - they've earned the right to go up against the Gunners.

Each week, the Associated Subsim Writers (ASW) will nominated their Most Valuable Torpedo (MVT) of the week, the single player who proved decisive in their teams performance.

For the effort of 12 receptions for 143 yards and 3 touchdown, for a total of 41.15 points, the second highest score of the years, the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present O'Dell Beckham of the Australian Taipans, the Week Fifteen MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

ReallyDedPoet
12-16-14, 08:41 PM
" If you're not first you're last "

-----------

" Second place is just first loser "

- R. Bobby - :88):D:D

j\k. Good luck to the two lads in the TB :up:

CaptainHaplo
12-16-14, 11:27 PM
Thanks RDP. My Cats are going to need all the luck they can get!

Wolferz
12-19-14, 05:16 AM
:wah::wah::wah:

:timeout: I never got the key to my office.:stare:

Gut Wrench
12-23-14, 12:02 AM
CATS PURR-FECT
Righteous Victory

The final week of the 2014 Subsim Fantasy League, and this week had all the hallmarks of being stellar. The #4 seeds, the Black Cats have come from no where, to roll over the toughest teams in the last weeks of the season, to claim a righteous victory, just one year after they finished as the #1 seed and were bundled out in the first play off game.

We have the big game, and all the little games covered, as three of the four games needed Monday night before a victory could be determined. In addition, we also needed at least two more rewrites of this column as teams came back from the dead. But before we get to any victory celebrations, let's get down with the one celebration we can all agree on.

NOMINATE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM

It was a big week in Fantasy Football, but if you are the Black Cats, it has been the toughest march to the Torpedo Bowl ever seen in this league. In the last four weeks, they needed to beat the Taipans, the Guns of Hochuli, and Who Dat Nation and then come back again against the Guns of Hochuli, if they were going to show that they had the balls to be the best in the league.

And show us their.....umm, spading they did.

Let's go the video tape.

The Guns of Hochuli were hosting the Black Cats after disposing of the Who Dat Nation. The Gunners, clearly the heavy favorites, had done (almost) everything right all season. Neither the Cat nor the Gunners started anybody on Thursday night - actually nobody wanted any part of that game, so it became a Saturday Night Shoot Out. The Gunners made a ***rookie*** mistake by starting both Alfred Morris (RB) and Eagles (DEF). That's not the first time this season that the Gunners have done this, but it would turn to be fatal this weekend. On Sunday Tony Romo (QB) lit up the Gunners scoreboard as they narrowed the gap to the Cats lead. On Sunday night, Marshawn Lynch (RB) playing injured, was the last player left to take the field while the Gunners still had Demariyus Thomas (WR) in their receiving corp left. Halfway through Sunday night Lynch (RB) had done nothing to put a lead together, but in the last 15 minutes, turned on the pace to run for over 100 yards and two touchdowns, for 22 points. Thomas was going to need at least 1 touchdown and 100 yards receiving on Monday night, but did not have it in the tank. He got the 100 yards, but not the touchdown. Black Cats prove that you can win the Torpedo Bowl on the road and run out 2014 winners against the Gunners, 101.5 - 97.01.

After the game, Coach FYC, grinning like a Cheshire Cat had this to say to the media.

"Screw you Gut Wrench, we're the best damm team in the league."

Oh. :oops:

Yes, I admit, I was not their biggest fans, but even fans sometimes get their calls wrong. Congratulations Black Cats.

The Torpedo Bowl was not the only game decided on Monday night. The Who Dat Nation, the #1 seed in the league, were hosting the Mini Dead Poets. The Mini's had come from nowhere in their debut season to put up a league record 9 games in a row and arrive in the Post Season as red hot favorites. The Mini's lost to divisional rivals to arrive in the #3 game, and were mightily upset after having the best debut season, ever. In Oregon, the Who Dat Nation just did not show up, barely managing to get 81 points on the board. The Mini's who have shown that they can score consistently week in and week out, arrived and just methodically went about demolishing the regular season's #1 team. Jordy Nelson (WR) lead the Mini Dead Poets with 25 points, but it was a combined touchdown tally that saw the Mini's finally put the game away in the early part of Monday night. Mini Dead Poets finish out the season as the #3 team defeating the Who Dat Nation 113 - 81.

The only game not decided on Monday was the "International Bowl". The matchup with the Australian Taipans and the Helmand Nighthawks. These two teams entered the league at the same time and have had a ding dong battle each year as divisional rivals. The Nighthawks have a Torpedo Bowl Championship on the mantle piece, while the Taipans are still waiting. This year, they were the two top scoring teams and this promised to be a shoot out. And it wasn't. The Nighthawks were lucky to put two touchdowns on the board as a team, before Coach Mister Chris yanked Andrew Luck (QB) from the field after delivering a negative score of -1.82. The Nighthawks had to wait for another disappointing performance from the Taipans Peyton manning (QB) which did not eventuate. Taipans get one back from the Nighthawks and run out holders of the #5 seed, 92 - 75.

In the final game of the season to be decided, the Bilge Rats were hosting the Wild Boston Terriers. The Rats started like a championship team, and then just wallowed for the rest of the season. The Terriers, holder of the Bad Luck Cup, looked like they would keep that title as they made another ***rookie*** mistake by starting both Jarvis Landry (RB) and Vikings (DEF). Fortunately for the Terriers, Landry did not score all day, and that lifted the Dogs to a respectable score. The Bilge Rats, having lost the last 6 in a row, kept that streak going by starting Matt Stafford (QB) another player who returned a negative score. The Rats had their opportunity to snatch victory on Monday Night with both Giovanni Bernard (RB) and Julius Thomas (TE) but the damage had already been done. Wild Boston Terriers get a little redemption and finish the season as the #7 team defeating the Bilge Rats 94 - 82.

There you have it folks, another season done, and quite frankly, a lot of guys in Vegas are very upset at having lost a lot of money on the long shot Black Cats to win the season. 16 of the most frustrating weeks in football are finished, and tomorrow, we will announce the All Star team for 2014.

But we can't finish this week without picking another MVT.

There were a number of stand out players, but there was only one who will be going home with a Torpedo Bowl tonight. For the effort of 113 rushing yards and 2 touchdowns, for a total of 22.65 points, and in the end needing every one of them the Associated Subsim Writers are pleased to present Marshawn Lynch of the Black Cats the Week Sixteen MVT.


http://i654.photobucket.com/albums/uu266/PioneerXI/MVT.jpg

CaptainHaplo
12-23-14, 12:26 AM
While I'd love to thank Marshawn Lynch, Johnathon Stewart and so many other fine NFL players - there are a few people who really do deserve thanks.

First - Gut Wrench. You have stayed up many a late night writing the reports - and you have done it year in and year out. To say it is appreciated by many - most of all us Subsim Fantasy Football players - is an understatement. Thank you for keeping everyone entertained and informed all at once. You deserve recognition for creativity and effort you consistently have displayed.

Next - the Commish, nikimcbee. While yahoo automation helps out, the organization of the season, playoffs and Torpedo Bowl wouldn't happen without you putting in the hard work. Thank you for making this game possible!

To all the non-ghost players, there has been smack talk, joking and lots of tense moments. Most of all, its been fun every year I have played. I have watched some of you, learned from you, and had a blast weeks on end. Thanks guys - can't wait to do it again next year!

ReallyDedPoet
12-23-14, 01:39 PM
First - Gut Wrench. You have stayed up many a late night writing the reports - and you have done it year in and year out. To say it is appreciated by many - most of all us Subsim Fantasy Football players - is an understatement. Thank you for keeping everyone entertained and informed all at once. You deserve recognition for creativity and effort you consistently have displayed.

Next - the Commish, nikimcbee. While yahoo automation helps out, the organization of the season, playoffs and Torpedo Bowl wouldn't happen without you putting in the hard work. Thank you for making this game possible!

To all the non-ghost players, there has been smack talk, joking and lots of tense moments. Most of all, its been fun every year I have played. I have watched some of you, learned from you, and had a blast weeks on end. Thanks guys - can't wait to do it again next year!

:agree:

My son had a great time this year and will be back again next year :yep:

I may be as well.

Congrats on the win :up:

Gut Wrench
12-27-14, 11:03 PM
SUBSIM ALLSTAR TEAM NAMED
Late....thanks to North Korea

Alright, I know, This should have been posted on Tuesday night. I am almost sure I did post it, the only reasonable account I can give for it not appearing is that...North Korea doesn't have Subsim or fantasy Football, and they surely won't let the world have either.

Fortunately the great internet gurus at Palace Neal have come to the rescue....and just in time too. Did you see who's nominated for the Best of Subsim????:D


VOTE SUBSIM FANTASY FOOTBALL FOR BEST OF SUBSIM

Remember, vote early and vote often. :rotfl2:

Each year, the Associated Subsim Wrietrs (ASW) get together after the Torpedo Bowl celbrations (quite often with head hung low and big headaches) and put together their All Star team.

The name selection has always been a much talked about point between the Associate Subsim Writers, and this year was no exception. There were a number of well deserving nominees, including some that should rightly have their own team. In the end, however, we stayed with something a little more closer to the heart.

So without further ado, we present to you, the 2014 Subsim Fantasy Football All Star Team, named in honor of, a heck of Detective, who was once a cowboy.

2014 JAMES GARNER MAVERICKS

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/a/a0/Brett_Maverick_-_James_Garner.jpg



QB: Andrew Luck - Helmand Nighthawks
WR:Antonio Brown - Wolfer's Bilge Rats
Demaryius Thomas - Guns of Hochuli
Jordy Nelson - Mini Dead Poets
RB: Demarco Murray - Guns of Hochuli
Matt Forte - Australian Taipans
TE: Rob Gronkowski - Helmand Nighthawks
K: Adam Vinatieri - Who Dat Nation
DEF: Houston Texans - Australian Taipans


BENCH

Aaron Rodgers - Wild Boston Terriers
Dez Bryant - Black Cats
Marshawn Lynch - Black Cats
Jimmy Graham - Who Dat Nation
Dan Carpenter - Michael's Team
St Louis - Green Beans

So there you have it folks, 17 weeks of the most Gut Wrenching 16 weeks of pretend football that you can find on this site. And we'll be back again in August to do it all over again. Can the Black Cats repeat? Will the Wild Boston Terriers end their slump? Are the Mini Dead Poets a team for destiny?

And did you remember to vote for 2014 Subsim Fantasy Football as the Best Thread of the Year?:rock: