Dating an older woman

[Bubblehead1980]

Somewhat of a dilemma and may get a few chuckles esp since not one to air my business in this manner but my friends were not much help lol.Recently met a woman who has pretty much everything I have wanted except she's a bit older, not quite a decade but close to it.

I usually date women younger than me and have no intentions of getting married etc, it's just not my thing but there is a strong mutual attraction that has been confirmed, let's just say alcohol played a role as it so often does.We have went out a few times and been casual but there is more to it on both ends, I just have reservations due to the complications.This woman is beautiful(looks 25 not 35) no children, no ex drama, successful career etc .What is the down side? Well, the cougar smack talk is already getting old plus there are some age differences that comes into play as far as attitudes etc. Nearly all of her friends are older, married etc my friends are my age or younger, mostly single or just dating so have found melding two different worlds can be complicated.

Just wondering if anyone here has been in such a situation? How you handled it. Of course, I'll make the best decision as I see it but always interesting to hear views of others.

[Platapus]

The Frau is older than I am. Does not seem to make much of a difference.

Of course, her doctor advised her to be careful during sex. When there is a significant difference in ages, the sexual acts can be risky.

She told the doctor, "if he dies, he dies." :D

[TarJak]

We are here for a good time not a long time. Go for it. You might learn something you don't know and so might she. Enjoy. :up:

[August]

When I was 25 I had a girlfriend that was 10 years older than me and it was great while it lasted.

You're right about the problems integrating with her friends and yours. It just doesn't work too well no matter what you do and I don't recommend trying. Just enjoy each other when you are together and hang out with your friends when you're not.

[Bubblehead1980]

The Frau is older than I am. Does not seem to make much of a difference.

Of course, her doctor advised her to be careful during sex. When there is a significant difference in ages, the sexual acts can be risky.

She told the doctor, "if he dies, he dies." :D

haha :arrgh!:

[Bubblehead1980]

We are here for a good time not a long time. Go for it. You might learn something you don't know and so might she. Enjoy. :up:

That's the view I tend to take, just gets complicated with different factors, sure we will figure it out.

[u crank]

She told the doctor, "if he dies, he dies." :D

:har: Now that's a love story.

[Tchocky]

I've been the older and the younger a few times by now - there are always issues, and I guess the larger the gap the greater the issue. That's not to say it has to be problematic, but pretending an age gap doesn't exist will cause problems long-term.

I suppose the best thing you can do, Bubbles, is let it run for a while then have an open conversation about what each of you wants from the relationship - that's something that changes with age.

[Armistead]

I would think at your age it shouldn't be a problem, unless you want kids.

If you were born in 80, I don't see the cougar thing being a big issue if she's less than 40.

[Wolferz]

Probably won't be an issue unless you're together long enough for her to reach menopause, then it can get a bit dicey and after that comes all the retrograde effects of the aging female body like osteoporosis etc.

Unless you are willing to make a long term loving commitment toward her care, you're going to have an issue.
My current wife is four years my senior and the last twenty years have seen her in degrading health due to one accident after another putting her flat on her back for extended periods of time. I'm talking almost totally helpless flat on her back.

But, always the big but, if you have found your soul mate, there shouldn't be any hardship too great.
Weigh your options carefully and good luck.

[Armistead]

Probably won't be an issue unless you're together long enough for her to reach menopause, then it can get a bit dicey and after that comes all the retrograde effects of the aging female body like osteoporosis etc.

Unless you are willing to make a long term loving commitment toward her care, you're going to have an issue.
My current wife is four years my senior and the last twenty years have seen her in degrading health due to one accident after another putting her flat on her back for extended periods of time. I'm talking almost totally helpless flat on her back.

But, always the big but, if you have found your soul mate, there shouldn't be any hardship too great.
Weigh your options carefully and good luck.

Yea, damn that menopause. I finally figured why they named it that, cause the mans sex life is put on pause, least it's not the same. Might be a problem if your a younger man.


"But, always the big but, if you have found your soul mate, there shouldn't be any hardship too great."

The but may get bigger as they age. My wife didn't have much of a but until she got older, now I like it, so don't see it as a hardship.

However, they say true love works through issues, but I say find love minus as many issues as possible.


I married an older gal as well, with my young good looks, I tell her she's a cougar.

[Aktungbby]

[QUOTE=August;2108796]When I was 25 I had a girlfriend that was 10 years older than me and it was great while it lasted.

"than I" you illiterate lothario; Mein Gott u r an offizer in der ubootwaffe after alles!:know:

[Aktungbby]

[QUOTE=Wolferz;2108822]Probably won't be an issue unless you're together long enough for her to reach menopause, then it can get a bit dicey and after that comes all the retrograde effects of the aging female body like osteoporosis etc.

Unless you are willing to make a long term loving commitment toward her care, you're going to have an issue.

There are long term loving commitments in frostbite falls? 'Damn the menopause! Full speed ahead!'-Farragut at Mobile's Bay lashed to the rigging and standing on a case of contraband astroglide.:arrgh!:

[Platapus]

I was actually looking forward to The Frau having Menopause. I heard that one of the symptoms was mood swings and I thought that the change might be for the better.

Protip: Don't tell your lady that. It does not end well. :nope:

[Aktungbby]

I was actually looking forward to The Frau having Menopause. I heard that one of the symptoms was mood swings and I thought that the change might be for the better.

Protip: Don't tell your lady that. It does not end well. :nope:
THEY know it doesn't end well... the life insurance never lapses $$$:arrgh!:

[Armistead]

I was actually looking forward to The Frau having Menopause. I heard that one of the symptoms was mood swings and I thought that the change might be for the better.

Protip: Don't tell your lady that. It does not end well. :nope:

Yea, laying in bed in he dark with the nag the other week and she asked me did I think she was still pretty. I told her she still looked good in the dark. Before menopause she would've laughed. She use to be great in the sack, now she's a pain in the ass.

[Aktungbby]

Make sure when you visit the next ancestral slave cemetery in one of your family tree outings, there ain't a pre-dug hole! 'Nag' vengeance is a grisly thing! :arrgh!:

[Bubblehead1980]

I would think at your age it shouldn't be a problem, unless you want kids.

If you were born in 80, I don't see the cougar thing being a big issue if she's less than 40.


I wasnt born in 80, just a number i chose when i signed up at ubi back in the day, think it wouldnt let me use my birth year for some reason, carried name over so people would know me here. Well, she is in mid 30's im pushing into later 20's. I don't want children and dont see that changing to be honest. I think the big issue is melding our lives enough to actually date and not stay the casual level we are now. She likes my friends but of course it's a different thing, my friends are all my age and mostly single, so when we go out its to a pub etc, he friends are mostly married, want us over for a dinner party , which is fine, I like both but we both have gotten annoyed with each others friends. Politics are an issue too so we just kind of steer clear of that, she's a liberal and that annoys me but most women are so its just something to deal with.

Heard some valid points here.Most of my friends consists of "she is a hot well off 35 year old, go for it" and if it was just sex would be one thing but turns out there are feelings on both ends, all that nonsense lol.

[Armistead]

I wasnt born in 80, just a number i chose when i signed up at ubi back in the day, think it wouldnt let me use my birth year for some reason, carried name over so people would know me here. Well, she is in mid 30's im pushing into later 20's. I don't want children and dont see that changing to be honest. I think the big issue is melding our lives enough to actually date and not stay the casual level we are now. She likes my friends but of course it's a different thing, my friends are all my age and mostly single, so when we go out its to a pub etc, he friends are mostly married, want us over for a dinner party , which is fine, I like both but we both have gotten annoyed with each others friends. Politics are an issue too so we just kind of steer clear of that, she's a liberal and that annoys me but most women are so its just something to deal with.

Heard some valid points here.Most of my friends consists of "she is a hot well off 35 year old, go for it" and if it was just sex would be one thing but turns out there are feelings on both ends, all that nonsense lol.

Be careful, it's easy to get invested, then try to fix issues. My brother has been doing it for years. The relationship is bad, but he thinks because he's invested years and feels in love, he won't give it up. They had a lot of chemistry to start, but were very different. They've broke wedding dates several times. He's rather conservative, she's liberal. He ain't gonna move on, just let the high and lows continue until he breaks

[Sailor Steve]

"than I" you illiterate lothario; Mein Gott u r an offizer in der ubootwaffe after alles!:know:
If you're going to lecture people, at least fix your quotes so they look right. :know:

[Aktungbby]

If you're going to lecture people, at least fix your quotes so they look right. :know:
Danke Herr moderator-mentor! At least I don' t take up space with the photos anymore. Still having problems with downloads to my SH5 though. :wah:

[Jimbuna]

Not sure I'm qualified much here seeing as my wife is only 6 months older than me but I believe if the chemistry is right, we are now in our thirtieth year together, age needn't be all that big a consideration.

[Armistead]

Danke Herr moderator-mentor! At least I don' t take up space with the photos anymore. Still having problems with downloads to my SH5 though. :wah:

Ignore the evil man behind the curtain.

I enjoy your postings, even if I don't understand them.

[Herr-Berbunch]

I've had a good relationship with an older woman - I didn't last but I put that down to my immaturity at the time. It was fun until the end, as long as you both know where you stand now then you'll be okay - just watch as your standpoints may move so as always communication is key.

Good luck :up:

[Aktungbby]

Ignore the evil man behind the curtain.

I enjoy your postings, even if I don't understand them.
Good lord, I'm in Kansas without a Lemat or Toto. Actually all relationships are with an 'older woman' since they regard us as their principal child anyway with a little pet therapy thrown in. After 33 years, I'm still happily clueless...and luvin' it!??:k_confused:

[Wolferz]

Good woman pulls plow.

[Bilge_Rat]

Best advice I can give is to follow your heart/gut instinct.

Relationships resist a logical analysis.

Finding someone to sleep with is easy, finding someone with that special something that makes you fall in love with them is rare and special, especially if it is mutual.

If it feels right, go for it, a few years difference is unimportant.