Do you have a best friend?

[Armistead]

Do you have one best friend that rises above all others, maybe a life time friend? My brother came by today with his best friend Brad. Both are now in their 50's, became best friends in 5th grade. They're always had each other through failed marriages, hard knocks. It hit me I miss having a best friend.

I had one through through high school to about 30. Sadly, he died and never really found another, just numerous friends I hang out, but none close. Seems I never had time in my 30'-40's, wife, kids, work, getting old.

Just wondered how many of you can claim a very best friend over all others?

[Red October1984]

:wah: Sorry to hear about your friend.

Not only do I have one....I have two....and I honestly don't know where I'd be in life without them. One I've known and been friends with forever...we have home video of us at my first birthday party. He's about 10 months older, but we've both been to hell and back.

The other, I've known all my school life...but only really became good friends a couple years ago. He goes to school with me but not in the same class. He's about 7 months older.

I seriously think that if either one died suddenly...I couldn't deal with it. :dead: Don't even want to think about it.

[kraznyi_oktjabr]

I had best friend. We met when I was in third grade in our small village school. He was then in fifth grade but as our school was so small that we all spent time together at breaks. We stayed in regular contact ever since. He died unexpectedly at May Day this year.:wah: It feels quite strange when you suddenly do not have that most trusted person you can talk freely with about difficult matters in your life without worrying whether or not they stay confidential.

[Sailor Steve]

Just wondered how many of you can claim a very best friend over all others?
I think I can. I may not be his, but he has been mine.

[nikimcbee]

In modern times, I'd say no. I'm pretty close with some of my co-workers though.

[Herr-Berbunch]

I think I can. I may not be his, but he has been mine.

Same here.

[AVGWarhawk]

I did have a best friend in high school. There are those that if called for help would come immediately but not really a best friend. My wife would really be my best friend. However, most of my best friends are the voices in my head. They speak the most sense and are reasonable. :o

[Jimbuna]

I think I can. I may not be his, but he has been mine.

Same here.

I think I'll make that three then.

[fireftr18]

A whole big group of friends from school days. The group started in middle school, grew in high school, then grew even more in college. After college, guess what, we started meeting girls and getting married, the group grew even more. Then we started having kids, that took over life for a while and group activities dwindled. Now our kids are getting older and the activities are starting to increase. We've been through good times, bad times, death of parents, and failed marriages with each other.

The fire dept is yet another close group. It is a brotherhood in that we feel a close kinship with each other. You only need to see a firefighter's funeral to understand.

[WernherVonTrapp]

The guys at my department have helped me when I needed it and have done more for me than some in my own family would have. Do I have a best friend, singularly?:hmmm: Well, like Gale Sayers says, "God is first, my friends/family come second and I Am Third." At least, that's what I strive to live by.

[Oberon]

I do indeed, this man:
http://www.subsim.com/radioroom/member.php?u=211974

Known him since High School (11-12 years), he was my Best Man at my wedding, and I consider him to be like a brother to me. Couldn't ask for a better best friend. :yep:

[Betonov]

No. I had one once. Her collection of idiots for boyfriends finally staked a wedge between us.
I have a couple of very good friends. They do the job better than anyone can hope.
The following pick makes a statement about us :D

http://www.toplifequotes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/Finding-friends-with-same-mental-disorder-as-you-is.jpg

And then there's the dog. The late Aros and the current Miik :D

[Ducimus]

Right now, my best friend is my wife. The way things have been going, it will probably remain that way until I die.

Aside from that, No, i don't. I've had friends. In the past I have had LOTS of friends. Many of whom I could call a brother. However for one reason or another, all of them are gone now. People move on, pass on, what have you. I've grown used to see people come and go in my life. In fact, I've come to expect everyone to leave at some point. It maybe a few weeks, it maybe a few years, but in the end, they all end up going. It's just how life is, and nobody ever said it was fair.

I hope my wife will be the exception. I want to grow old with her. What worries me is that cancer seems to come up alot in her family, because of that I fear one day she will leave me too. I guess if that day ever comes to pass, I shouldn't be surprised, and her loss I will mourn until i die.

I stopped trying to make friends a long time ago.

[WernherVonTrapp]

Right now, my best friend is my wife. The way things have been going, it will probably remain that way until I die.

Aside from that, No, i don't. I've had friends. In the past I have had LOTS of friends. Many of whom I could call a brother. However for one reason or another, all of them are gone now. People move on, pass on, what have you. I've grown used to see people come and go in my life. In fact, I've come to expect everyone to leave at some point. It maybe a few weeks, it maybe a few years, but in the end, they all end up going. It's just how life is, and nobody ever said it was fair.

I hope my wife will be the exception. I want to grow old with her. What worries me is that cancer seems to come up alot in her family, because of that I fear one day she will leave me too. I guess if that day ever comes to pass, I shouldn't be surprised, and her loss I will mourn until i die.

I stopped trying to make friends a long time ago.
Well said.:up:
I love my wife too, with all my heart, but you're way ahead of me on the "best friend" part of it. I wish I could say that, but I think it's more a case of me keeping her, and probably everyone else in my life, at arm's length. There's a reason for that too, but not worth getting into here.

[Jimbuna]

Right now, my best friend is my wife. The way things have been going, it will probably remain that way until I die.

Aside from that, No, i don't. I've had friends. In the past I have had LOTS of friends. Many of whom I could call a brother. However for one reason or another, all of them are gone now. People move on, pass on, what have you. I've grown used to see people come and go in my life. In fact, I've come to expect everyone to leave at some point. It maybe a few weeks, it maybe a few years, but in the end, they all end up going. It's just how life is, and nobody ever said it was fair.

I hope my wife will be the exception. I want to grow old with her.

I can certainly identify with that :cool:

[Armistead]

I can certainly identify with that :cool:

I think that's the case with many of us. Course, my wife and I always have given each other plenty of space to do "your own thing", just don't do it as much now that were older, now more time together. Seems the older I get, the less need I have for relationships, except family.

[Fubar2Niner]

Right now, my best friend is my wife. The way things have been going, it will probably remain that way until I die.

Aside from that, No, i don't. I've had friends. In the past I have had LOTS of friends. Many of whom I could call a brother. However for one reason or another, all of them are gone now. People move on, pass on, what have you. I've grown used to see people come and go in my life. In fact, I've come to expect everyone to leave at some point. It maybe a few weeks, it maybe a few years, but in the end, they all end up going. It's just how life is, and nobody ever said it was fair.

I hope my wife will be the exception. I want to grow old with her. What worries me is that cancer seems to come up alot in her family, because of that I fear one day she will leave me too. I guess if that day ever comes to pass, I shouldn't be surprised, and her loss I will mourn until i die.

I stopped trying to make friends a long time ago.

Precious words mate. I lost most my family similarly, as has my wife. All we can hope is that what ever time is left we make it as special as we can :yep:

[Jimbuna]

I think that's the case with many of us. Course, my wife and I always have given each other plenty of space to do "your own thing", just don't do it as much now that were older, now more time together. Seems the older I get, the less need I have for relationships, except family.

Precious words mate. I lost most my family similarly, as has my wife. All we can hope is that what ever time is left we make it as special as we can :yep:

Most poignant :sunny:

[AVGWarhawk]

Precious words mate. I lost most my family similarly, as has my wife. All we can hope is that what ever time is left we make it as special as we can :yep:

Seems most come about this way. My wife's parents passed at age 50 and 55. My dad passed in 2010 and my mom in 2011. That basically leaves me and my wife. We have two daughters. By and large we have just each other to depend on. As I posted a few back, my wife is my best friend. We have been married 19 years. Looking forward to another 19. At the end of the day we both realize all we have is each other.

[Sailor Steve]

When my wife left me after eleven years, she quoted the old saying "I hope we can still be friends." I wasn't angry at all, just honest, when I replied "When were we ever friends?"

I'd post that in the joke thread, but it wasn't funny then or now.

[Armistead]

Seems most come about this way. My wife's parents passed at age 50 and 55. My dad passed in 2010 and my mom in 2011. That basically leaves me and my wife. We have two daughters. By and large we have just each other to depend on. As I posted a few back, my wife is my best friend. We have been married 19 years. Looking forward to another 19. At the end of the day we both realize all we have is each other.

Yep, tough. I lost my mom a lil over two years ago, in some ways she was my best friend. My dad is with hospice now. Never really was close to him, except tried the last few years. Getting old just sucks.

[Platapus]

Questions like this always depend on how one defines friend and best friend. People have different perceptions and opinions. It is really up to the individual.

Coming from the military it was tough to have a "best friend" as every few years we all rotated to another assignment or even location. I suppose that these days, with social media, it is easier to keep track of people than it used to be.

Now, as an old fart, all my colleagues have their lives and families so it is once again difficult to cultivate a "best friend". But then I have a more conservative definition of friend and consider someone lucky if they have 2-3 good friends in their lifetime. Others have a more liberal definition. What ever works for people. :up:

So, in order to try and identify common ground -- what exactly IS a best friend and what makes them different from a friend?

[nikimcbee]

Wait, what was I thinking? I have 2 best friends:

http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQb8ugOu1KBG9reduosQJNAxkD-7CW57DNYyFfyBOrUEXove-5-cTac7uE2

http://desmond.imageshack.us/Himg513/scaled.php?server=513&filename=flightmuseumseattle044.jpg&res=medium

[WernherVonTrapp]

-- what exactly IS a best friend and what makes them different from a friend?
That's a good question.:hmmm: The last time I had anyone that I categorized as a "best friend", I was a juvenile. Now that I consider the question, I have lots of friends, I just don't know if the term "best friend" would even apply with me anymore. Still, my wife is the one I'm closest to, and who knows me more intimately than anyone else. Since she and I are in the same boat (i.e., we have no other reliable family members), we only have each other, and our children of course.

[Stealhead]

I do not really use the "best friend" term either.I have friends and I have good friends who are people I enjoy the company of enough that I can tolerate their annoying tendencies and they mine.Another good term I suppose would be good friend.


I do not really classify my wife as a good friend because the relationship dynamic with a spouse has some aspects that make that type of relationship outside the bounds of a friendship.I certainly get along well with my wife though.

I have a few people that fall into the good friend category.

The one I have known the longest is Mike.You could say I have "known" him my entire life in fact my mother gave his mother my baby clothes when I out grew them.Of course he grew up to be a fairly large man and he would not be able to wear my clothes anymore.I was actually not very good friends with Mike until the last year or two of high school and since then we have been good friends.I probably gave him the best advice of any friend.He had been dating for a few years women that where a few years younger (not much maybe 4 or 5 years younger) and was getting frustrated. I told him he should try dating women closer to our age(at that time late 20's) I guess it was good advice because he has been married for several years now seems pretty happy.

I have another good friend George actually Geōrgios (he is from Greece originally) whom I actually met though the aforementioned friend though much more recently in the past 4 years.This person is was at one time a partner with Mike they are paramedics though Mike is now in a supervisory role.So they do not work together directly anymore.Still we usually hang out pretty regular.Usually George takes his daughters to go swimming at Mikes pool and while they swim we will sit and watch movies or football and movies.Mike gets very intense during games so half the fun is watching him freak out.When we watch movies we usually joke about different aspects for example we all agreed that the best part of Flight was the first 5 minutes(Nadine Velazquez) and we joked about that for the majority of the movie.

My neighbor is defiantly a good friend he has a much longer Laotian name but he just goes by "Phet".Phet is actually only a few years younger than my father and they have some things in common because they both fought on the same side in the expanded Vietnam War.I usually do a lot of out doors activities with Phet because he likes to hunt and fish like me.He has a real green thumb as well so he shows me all kinds of ways to grow better crops.He also has a really good sense of humor.

There are a few others mostly people that I met in the air force who I have a close friendship with.

If I had to pick a most loyal friend it would be my cat Bella.We have other cats and dogs and some other animals at the house but Bella is most loyal to me.She knows the sound of my truck and my 240Z and roughly the time I come home and she sits and waits by the window when she hears me driving up she runs down the hall and waits at the top of the stairs for me she does not like it when I delay coming into the houses and usually nags me if I do.

[Sailor Steve]

Questions like this always depend on how one defines friend and best friend.
That's a good point. We tend to form attachments, and sometimes prefer one to all the others. I had one close friend from kindergarten through high school. There were other friends I hung out with, but he was the only one I was almost attached to. We were regulars at each other's family dinners and did everything together. I saw him for the last time when I was in the navy, and while I thought about looking him up from time to time it just didn't seem important anymore.

When you get married everything changes. Either your wife becomes your best friend or you don't stay married, unless it's out of habit. I don't go out much anymore, so while I'm on friendly terms with my neighbors there isn't anyone I hang out with on a steady basis.

One of my favorite movie lines of all time is from Tombstone, when Turkey Creek Johnson asks Doc Holliday why he's wasting his final days riding the revenge trail.
"Wyatt Earp is my friend."
"Friend? Hell, I got lots of friends."
"I don't."

[Armistead]

That's a good point. We tend to form attachments, and sometimes prefer one to all the others. I had one close friend from kindergarten through high school. There were other friends I hung out with, but he was the only one I was almost attached to. We were regulars at each other's family dinners and did everything together. I saw him for the last time when I was in the navy, and while I thought about looking him up from time to time it just didn't seem important anymore.

When you get married everything changes. Either your wife becomes your best friend or you don't stay married, unless it's out of habit. I don't go out much anymore, so while I'm on friendly terms with my neighbors there isn't anyone I hang out with on a steady basis.

One of my favorite movie lines of all time is from Tombstone, when Turkey Creek Johnson asks Doc Holliday why he's wasting his final days riding the revenge trail.
"Wyatt Earp is my friend."
"Friend? Hell, I got lots of friends."
"I don't."

Had a "good friend" in high school, one I thought would be friends for life.
We did everything together. He got married, later I did. He got divorced and we hung around pretty much again as my wife then showed horses everywhere. I finally ended up divorced. Guess who later started dating my ex? Not sure why I felt betrayed, but I did. We didn't hang around much after that.

Both Wyatt Earp and Tombstone have great one-liners

[Takeda Shingen]

I don't really quantify my friends. I suppose my wife would be my "best" friend, but our relationship really isn't something that I would trivialize as just being friends. Same with my daughters.

So, I guess outside of my family if you are my friend, you are my friend. I don't put them in some sort of rank order. I do have a lot of friends. Only modesty restrains me from saying that I am a very popular individual. I am kind and generous with both my time and money. My wife and I each host semi-regular get-togethers for our more nerdy pursuits (in fact, she's the one that really put me in touch with my inner jocknerd). I host a weekly literary classics book club and an MtG club on the first Friday of every month. She has a D&D group that meets regularly and hosts a fighting game tournament a few times a year. As such, we always have people coming and going around the house. Fun stuff.

[AVGWarhawk]

I don't really quantify my friends. I suppose my wife would be my "best" friend, but our relationship really isn't something that I would trivialize as just being friends. Same with my daughters.



It is not really trivializing. It is more of additional aspect in a relationship.

[Takeda Shingen]

<Deleted. Wrong thread>

[Ducimus]

Something just hit me this morning as i was feeding my dog. Man's best friend has never stopped being thus.

A good dog really is a great thing. The affection and loyalty they give to their owners is unconditional, and they stay by their owners side no matter what. You couldn't ask for more of any creature.

[WernherVonTrapp]

Something just hit me this morning as i was feeding my dog. Man's best friend has never stopped being thus.

A good dog really is a great thing. The affection and loyalty they give to their owners is unconditional, and they stay by their owners side no matter what. You couldn't ask for more of any creature.
Indeed, I agree 100 percent. I'm an avid dog lover and have responded to calls where owners have abused their dogs. Despite the abuse the dogs received, they still treated their owners as if they were the greatest persons on the planet.
I've also gone far beyond what was required, or officially allowed by my department, in reuniting lost dogs with their owners or to prevent them from being taken to the county pound. I've also saved a few of their lives over the years.:smug:http://i1045.photobucket.com/albums/b456/archangel501/Smileys/b9472d7a.gif

[Aktungbby]

When my wife left me after eleven years, she quoted the old saying "I hope we can still be friends." I wasn't angry at all, just honest, when I replied "When were we ever friends?"

I'd post that in the joke thread, but it wasn't funny then or now.
ACH! My wife, the divorce ATTY, to me: " I'm your wife...not your friend!" Going on 33 years of pure bliss! Oswald Boelke had the knack of making every one feel as if they held a special place with him. I have several long term friends who deem me THEIR best friend and I have never failed in a crisis... but for myself and in my line of work: Trust no one-it saves energy. Always anticipate the foibles of your friends as it preserves the friendship. And stay married, that way you live longer statistically and you don't make the same mistake twice!:arrgh!:

[Father Goose]

Not only do I have one....I have two....and I honestly don't know where I'd be in life without them.

I was expecting..."Admiral Armistead and Captain Goose". :O:
I don't know where we went wrong? :confused:

[Platapus]

Indeed, I agree 100 percent. I'm an avid dog lover and have responded to calls where owners have abused their dogs. Despite the abuse the dogs received, they still treated their owners as if they were the greatest persons on the planet.
I've also gone far beyond what was required, or officially allowed by my department, in reuniting lost dogs with their owners or to prevent them from being taken to the county pound. I've also saved a few of their lives over the years.:smug:http://i1045.photobucket.com/albums/b456/archangel501/Smileys/b9472d7a.gif

I am happy we have people like you. You make our society just a tiny bit better. That's all we can expect from a citizen. :salute: