Your Favorite Quotes

[u crank]

"In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But in practice, there is."

Yogi Berra

[Jimbuna]

You can observe a lot by just watching.

Yogi Berra

[Sailor Steve]

“I live by one law...Murphy's.”
—Tom Smith, The Firefly Song

[Jimbuna]

The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.

Walter Bagehot

[Sailor Steve]

"Just what I always wanted - a store-bought, lace-lined, double-barreled slingshot!"
—Ellie-May Clampett

[Jimbuna]

"Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever."

Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

[Sailor Steve]

“As for me, all I know is that I know nothing.”
—Socrates, in Plato, Phaedrus, section CCXXV

[Jimbuna]

"The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts."

Bertrand Russell (1872-1970)

[Sailor Steve]

Umm...post #730, two pages ago. :sunny:

[Sailor Steve]

“Education doesn't make you smarter.”
—Aleksandr I. Solzhenitsyn

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

Look at my signature.

[Jimbuna]

Like math? We could add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide our legs, and multiply!

Frank

[Sailor Steve]

“It's a universal law – intolerance is the first sign of an inadequate education. An ill-educated person behaves with arrogant impatience, whereas truly profound education breeds humility.”
—Aleksandr I. Solzhenitsyn

[mapuc]

Subsim? It runs in my veins

[Jimbuna]

Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.

Yogi Berra

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

If you're going through hell, keep going.


You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life.
- Both Winston Churchill.

"Nuts!"- Brigader General Anthony McAuliffe (101st Airborne), responding to the German call for surrender at Bastogne.

[Sailor Steve]

"It is the nature of man to rise to greatness if greatness is expected of him."
—John Steinbeck

[Jimbuna]

"When one person suffers from a delusion it is called insanity; when many people suffer from a delusion it is called religion."

Robert Pirsig

[Sailor Steve]

"The more corrupt the state, the more numerous the laws."
—Tacitus

[Sailor Steve]

"Tax the rich, feed the poor, 'til there are no rich no more."
—Ten Years After, I'd Love To Change The World

[Jimbuna]

I can write better than anybody who can write faster, and I can write faster than anybody who can write better.

A. J. Liebling

[Sailor Steve]

A. J. Liebling was a cruiser?

[Armistead]

"Something in the way she moos, attracts me like no udder lover"

Bernie the cow

[Sailor Steve]

"Something in the way she moos, attracts me like no udder lover"

Bernie the cow
Sounds like a load of bull to...
-Me

[TarJak]

Well there's something you don't see everyday - Dr. Peter Venkman, Ghostbusters

[Jimbuna]

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.

Soren Aabye Kierkegaard

[Platapus]

“If a man in the West cannot imagine democracy without separation of church and state, many in the Muslim world find it impossible to imagine legitimate democracy with it” -- Noah Feldman

[Mittelwaechter]

“If a man in the West cannot imagine democracy without separation of church and state, many in the Muslim world find it impossible to imagine legitimate democracy with it” -- Noah Feldman

The aristocracy and the church once ruled our world, both partners made politics, the church indoctrinated the people what to support, what to fear, to accept the given circumstances.
With democracy we disempowered both and while the church lost political influence, the aristocracy used its advantage of property and money in the age of industrialisation and formed corporations. The state powers used them to reach their objectives - the merger of state power and corporate power is known as fascism.

Meanwhile the leader of the combo has changed and the corporate power uses the state powers to reach their objectives. Buying the presidency is socially accepted and the revolving door between state and corporations never stops. Let's call it Neo-Fascism - or corporate oligarchy.

The job of the church has been taken by the media. Their priests show us the former glass windows and mural paintings in TV and newspapers now and the preachment is told on TV or in written form. They tell us what to support, what to fight, who's good or bad, what to bear and what to buy. Our new religion is the Gospel of Dow Jones and we are overwhelmed by economy data every day. It's as intense as praying five times a day to the east. :yep:

In other parts of the world the history went different and the church kept their power and controls the economy as the daily pie of religion. They run a democracy as we do and it is as effective as ours. But they are the bad ones - says our Lord - because their democracy is fake. It's socially accepted, but only because the poor people don't know better and are indoctrinated by their true rulers. :yep:

And goddamn they've got our oil...



Oh - and a quote?

“Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.”― Mahatma Gandhi

[Sailor Steve]

"Trade and commerce, if they were not made of India-rubber, would never manage to bounce over the obstacles which legislators are continually putting in their way"
—Henry David Thoreau

[Sailor Steve]

"No man's life, liberty or property is safe while the legislature is in session."
—Gideon J. Tucker

[Jimbuna]

Give me chastity and continence, but not yet.

Saint Augustine

[Sailor Steve]

"Censorship is telling a man he can't have a steak just because a baby can't chew it.
—Unknown, often attributed to Mark Twain

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT??!!"- Most first-time players of GWX after having been destroyed because of the 'crash dive of doom'.

[Jimbuna]

You may not be interested in war, but war is interested in you.

Leon Trotsky

[Sailor Steve]

"I find that the further I go back the better things were, whether they happened or not."
—Mark Twain

[Platapus]

Nostalgia is not what it used to be. - Peter De Vries

[Jimbuna]

I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.

Galileo Galilei

[Sailor Steve]

"It is by the goodness of God that we have in our country three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either."
—Mark Twain

[Kptlt. Neuerburg]

“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.” Groucho Marx

[Horst Degen]

" Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy."

Frank Sinatra.

[Jimbuna]

We are all atheists about most of the gods humanity has ever believed in. Some of us just go one god further.

Richard Dawkins

[Sailor Steve]

"Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to."
—Mark Twain

[Mr Quatro]

I wanted to post this over on: http://www.subsim.com/radioroom/showthread.php?t=213534 (http://www.subsim.com/radioroom/showthread.php?t=213534)

but I decided not to :O:

“We don’t know one millionenth of one percent about anything.” Thomas Edison

[Jimbuna]

I know that campaigns can seem small, and even silly. Trivial things become big distractions. Serious issues become sound bites. And the truth gets buried under an avalanche of money and advertising. If you're sick of hearing me approve this message, believe me - so am I.

Barack Obama

[Sailor Steve]

"Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it."
—Mark Twain

[Armistead]

Life is hard, it's harder if you're stupid
~John Wayne

[Jimbuna]

I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.

E E Cummings

[Sailor Steve]

"When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished by how much he'd learned in seven years."
—Mark Twain

[Platapus]

A dog is not considered a good dog because he is a good barker. A man is not considered a good man because he is a good talker.
Chuang-tzu

[Jimbuna]

Give me a museum and I'll fill it.

Pablo Picasso

[Sailor Steve]

"A democracy cannot exist as a permanent form of government. It can only exist until a majority of voters discover that they can vote themselves largess out of the public treasury."
—Attributed to Alexander Tytler, but without confirmation

[Platapus]

Thorns may hurt you
men desert you
sunlight turn to fog;
but you're never friendless ever
if you have a dog.
Douglas Mallock

[Jimbuna]

The faithful dog - why should I strive
To speak his merits, while they live
In every breast, and man's best friend
Does often at his heels attend.

The earliest citation of the actual word choice - in English - is traced to a poem printed in the The New-York Literary Journal, Volume 4, 1821

[Jimbuna]

In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.

Martin Luther King Jr.

[Sailor Steve]

"It's dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."

—Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire

[u crank]

Can't say if it's authentic but.....sounds right. :)

"I outlived Michael Jackson. Bet you didn't see that coming."
-Keith Richards.

[Sailor Steve]

It comes from an internet picture, so I'm betting he didn't actually say it.

[Jimbuna]

Do, or do not. There is no 'try'.

Yoda

[Sailor Steve]

"It is difficult to free fools from the chains they revere."
—Francois Marie Arouet Voltaire

[Platapus]

Gratitude: that quality which the Canine Mongrel seldom lacks; which the Human Mongrel seldom possesses!
Lion P.S. Rees

[Jimbuna]

I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves.

Ludwig Wittgenstein

[Kptlt. Neuerburg]

"Say not always what you know, but always know what you say" Claudius

[CCIP]

http://i.imgur.com/MebnqTv.jpg

[Sailor Steve]

"That whereas the battleship sea monster we are imitating has been named the Dreadnought - an archaic name - this man o' war is hereby named the Skeered o' Nothin' as an expression of our true American spirit..."
—Congressman John S. Williams of Mississippi, arguing against appropriations for USS Michigan

[Aktungbby]

"Well, George, we've knocked the bastard off!" Sir Edmond Hillary on summiting Everest 5/29

[u crank]

In a land of immigrants, one was not an alien but simply the latest arrival.

Rudolf Arnheim

[Platapus]

"I freed the what?!" Abe Lincoln the next morning after a bender.

[Sailor Steve]

"I freed the what?!" Abe Lincoln the next morning after a bender.
:rotfl2:

That's as bad as Val Kilmer's line from Real Genius: "In the words of the immortal Socrates...'I drank what?'."

[Jimbuna]

Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.

Martin Luther King Jr.

[Sailor Steve]

"The most common way for people to give up their power is by thinking they don't have any."
—Alice Walker

[Jimbuna]

C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.

Bjarne Stroustrup

[Mittelwaechter]

Happiness means to realize you have everything you need.

:yep:

[Sailor Steve]

"People call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat or a prostitute.”
—Rebecca West

[Jimbuna]

Problems worthy of attack prove their worth by fighting back.

Paul Erdos

[Platapus]

"The best way to get along [in life] is to learn all you can, then do your best and don't worry - especially about things over which you have no control." Charles Henry Nimitz. Chet's Grand-dad.

[Jimbuna]

Try to learn something about everything and everything about something.

Thomas Henry Huxley

[Jimbuna]

The only difference between me and a madman is that I'm not mad.

Salvador Dali

[Jimbuna]

Everybody pities the weak; jealousy you have to earn.

Arnold Schwarzenegger

[Platapus]

Old men miss many dogs.
Steve Allen

[Mittelwaechter]

"The distance between insanity and genius is measured only by success."
Bruce Feirstein

[P_Funk]

Speaking of statistical models,

"Essentially, all models are wrong, but some are useful."
-George E. P. Box

[Jimbuna]

I have never killed anyone, but I have read some obituary notices with great satisfaction.

Clarence Darrow

[Wolferz]

" A little knowledge is dangerous"
"So is a lot"

Albert Einstein

[Platapus]

A Canadian psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog's IQ. Here's how it works: if you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.
Jay Leno

[Jimbuna]

Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.

H. G. Wells

[Platapus]

“Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.” probably not said by Buddha

[Alex]

"The distance between insanity and genius is measured only by success."
Bruce Feirstein
True. :hmm2:

Googled Bruce Feirstein, and this guy was born in 1956... For some reason I would have said he was born in the early 1900s myself :hmm2:, and said such a thing at the right moment in History (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AtSt5XZ7fq4) when that sentence had to be said.


Other than that,
We may find in the long run that tinned food is a deadlier weapon than the machine-gun.George Orwell

[Jimbuna]

Talent does what it can; genius does what it must.

Edward George Bulwer-Lytton

[Jimbuna]

Many wealthy people are little more than janitors of their possessions.

Frank Lloyd Wright

[Armistead]

Choose anger over despair

[Jimbuna]

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

Oscar Wilde

[Armistead]

I'm a direct person, in an indirect sort of way.

Me

although Im sure they're other versions of it

[Jimbuna]

Yeah, I know I'm ugly... I said to a bartender, 'Make me a zombie.' He said 'God beat me to it.'

Rodney Dangerfield

[Platapus]

Our task must be to free ourselves... by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature and its beauty.


Probably something else that Albert Einstein never actually said

[Jimbuna]

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.

Albert Einstein

[TarJak]

I divide my officers into four groups. There are clever, diligent, stupid, and lazy officers. Usually two characteristics are combined. Some are clever and diligent -- their place is the General Staff. The next lot are stupid and lazy -- they make up 90 percent of every army and are suited to routine duties. Anyone who is both clever and lazy is qualified for the highest leadership duties, because he possesses the intellectual clarity and the composure necessary for difficult decisions. One must beware of anyone who is stupid and diligent -- he must not be entrusted with any responsibility because he will always cause only mischief. - Attributed to General Kurt von Hammerstein-Equord

[Aktungbby]

^What luck for rulers that men do not think.”
― Adolf Hitler (http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/30691.Adolf_Hitler)

[Eichhörnchen]

Of a young subaltern by his CO: "His men will follow him anywhere... mainly out of curiosity"

[Eichhörnchen]

"Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans"

[Oberon]

"A B-25 is not designed for digging tunnels..."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2mIJllg5sg&feature=player_detailpage#t=434 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2mIJllg5sg&feature=player_detailpage#t=437)

[Aktungbby]

"the light you see at the end of a tunnel is the front of an oncoming train"-David Lee Roth

[Eichhörnchen]

"What happens if I press this red one?"

[Jimbuna]

Spectemur Agendo

[Eichhörnchen]

"I've spent my life chasing women; now I only chase them downhill"

[Jimbuna]

Love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it does. Love is a battle, love is a war; love is a growing up.

James A. Baldwin

[Eichhörnchen]

"I wouldn't wanna belong to any club which would have me as a member"

[Jimbuna]

"I wouldn't wanna belong to any club which would have me as a member"

I'll remind you before anyone else does....that's already been posted :)

[TarJak]

I'll remind you before anyone else does....that's already been posted :)

Beat me to it. ;)

[Jimbuna]

Beat me to it. ;)

Can't have been cricket then :)

[TarJak]

Can't have been cricket then :)

No you surely would lose if it were. :O:

[Eichhörnchen]

"Grief is the price we pay for love"

[Rilder]

"It's a well-known fact that history is written by the victors. More than that, people who triumph over adversity often decide adversity is therefore fine."
- Deborah Orr

[Jimbuna]

Better late than ever.

et al

[STEED]

Democracy is dead so live with it.

[Eichhörnchen]

"Your dinner's on the table."

[Aktungbby]

As I begin to learn more I see that things are better than I had thought. Sailor Steve:hmmm: :03: :up: truly profound IMHO!

[Armistead]

Repetitive coincidence probably isn't

~Meh

although I'm sure it's been basically said before....

Oh, and another one that came into my head in the Bilge..

The known outcome takes away the suspense.

[Kptlt. Neuerburg]

"How many minutes are in an anytime Frank?". ~ Capt. B.F "Hawkeye" Pierce, M*A*S*H 4077

"Did you really call a one star general a Nincompac?" Lt. Col. Henry Blake M*A*S*H 4077

[Kaptlt.Endrass]

I have many favorite quotes, some probably already here. Nevertheless, some are...

"The enemy of my enemy is my friend."-Arabian proverb

"In war; Resolution. In defeat; Defiance. In victory; Magnamity. In peace; Goodwill."-Churchill

"If you're going through hell, keep going."-Churchill

"All the great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word; Freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope."-Churchill

"You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life."-Churchill

"A true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him."-G.K. Chesterson

"Freedom is not free, but the US Marine Corps will pay most of your share."-Ned Dolan

"A man may die, nations may rise and fall, but an idea lives on."-JFK

"Heroes may not be braver than anyone else. They're just brave five minutes longer."-Ronald Reagan

"We sleep safely in our beds at night because rough men stand ready in the night ready to visit violence upon those who would harm us."-George Orwell

"It doesn't take a hero to order men into battle. It takes a hero to be one of those men who goes into battle."-General Norman Schwarzkopf

"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them."-JFK

"...dissent, rebellion, and all-around hell-raising remain the true duty of patriots."Barbara Ehrenreich

"It is easy to take liberty for granted when you have never had it taken from you."-Dick Cheney

"Maybe there are 5000, maybe 10000 Nazi bast**ds in their concrete foxholes before the Third Army. Now, if Ike stops holding Monty's hand and gives me some supplies, I'll go through the Seigfried Line like s**t through a goose."-General George S. Patton

These, I think, are my most favorite.

[Eichhörnchen]

"It takes all sorts to make a world" (Eva Braun, 1945... not)

[Aktungbby]

'Crito, we owe a cock to Asclepius. Do pay it. Don't forget.' -Socrates

[Harvs]

From our Pt instructor SSgt Rawcliffe "pain is only a sensation, the greater the pain the greater the sensation" he was completely nuts.

[Eichhörnchen]

'Crito, we owe a cock to Asclepius. Do pay it. Don't forget.' -Socrates

Nah... better not.

[Sailor Steve]

http://i14.photobucket.com/albums/a325/SailorSteve/Belief%20and%20Intelligence_zpsnhjkektw.jpg (http://s14.photobucket.com/user/SailorSteve/media/Belief%20and%20Intelligence_zpsnhjkektw.jpg.html)

[Eichhörnchen]

http://i.imgur.com/WBTKhB6.jpg Fischer: "Ah, you English: you will laugh at anything, but mostly you laugh at nothing"

[Jimbuna]

Why bother taking the chance, there is always another fool out there who will try it out first.

[STEED]

STEED - If I wanted to watch rubbish I would have taken my deck chair and beer to my local rubbish dump.

Yes I came up with it as far as I know.

[Eichhörnchen]

OK, what did I just miss here?:hmmm:

[Schroeder]

OK, what did I just miss here?:hmmm:
British humour.:O:

I guess you're becoming German after all.:D

[Sailor Steve]

A quote is a saying from somebody else, and should be attributed to its source. Just saying something you think is funny is not a quote. Some people don't seem to get that.

[Eichhörnchen]

Thanks for the lesson in semantics: I genuinely thought that a quote could come from any source, including a fictitious character (note I use the word "fictitious" and not "fictional", since we're being so proper). Do pardon my gross ignorance.

[STEED]

kryton - "I can't believe it I simply can't bel......

Kryton's head blows up! :haha:


kryton - Ketchup with Lobster you want.....

Kryton's spare head blows up! :har:

RED DWARF VII

[Eichhörnchen]

Oh I see what happened there: a misunderstanding. Steve mistakenly thought I invented that quote. Well Fischer is a fictitious character in the film "The Colditz Story" and he makes this memorable remark in the movie; most guys of our age will remember it, that's all.

Sorry for the bared teeth...

http://i.imgur.com/h1nV0Jd.jpg

[Sailor Steve]

Oh I see what happened there: a misunderstanding. Steve mistakenly thought I invented that quote.
You're being paranoid. I wasn't even referring to your post.

[Sailor Steve]

STEED - If I wanted to watch rubbish I would have taken my deck chair and beer to my local rubbish dump.

Yes I came up with it as far as I know.
Nothing wrong with quoting yourself. It's a good saying, it's funny and it's based in truth. That said, it's not a favorite quote unless you let people know that's what you're doing.

"Some people are born stupid. I've had to work hard my whole life to get this way...

And I'm proud of the job I've done."
-Me

[Eichhörnchen]

You're being paranoid. I wasn't even referring to your post.

Sorry about that, Steve... very bad day yesterday is all I can say (I get 'em too).

[STEED]

Nothing wrong with quoting yourself. It's a good saying, it's funny and it's based in truth. That said, it's not a favorite quote unless you let people know that's what you're doing.

Oh my I nearly started WW3 again. :har:

Yes I did say that round a friends house in reference to the rubbish on TV and yes he laughed at my passing comment. Feel free to use it yourselves if you find yourselves in a similar situation.

[Fubar2Niner]

Seen on a public toilet wall back in the eighties.

" My mother made me a transvestite! "..

" If I give her the wool, will she make me one? ""

anon

[Eichhörnchen]

When I was at school, our PE teacher to a mate of mine (draped over a wooden gym horse) who he was just about to 'slipper':

"I'm going to print Dunlop all over your backside"

[Aktungbby]

You're being paranoid. I wasn't even referring to your post.

Sorry about that, Steve... very bad day yesterday is all I can say (I get 'em too). Paranoia strikes deep
Into your life it will creep
It starts when you're always afraid
Step out of line, the men come and take you away
- Buffalo Springfield (0f Sailor Steve and an infraction!??:O:)

[Armistead]

A quote is a saying from somebody else, and should be attributed to its source. Just saying something you think is funny is not a quote. Some people don't seem to get that.

Can we still quote ourselves regardless of what others think here....

[Sailor Steve]

Can we still quote ourselves regardless of what others think here....

Nothing wrong with quoting yourself. It's a good saying, it's funny and it's based in truth. That said, it's not a favorite quote unless you let people know that's what you're doing.

Don't get me wrong here. It's just looks weird to say something and call it a quote when it doesn't look like you quoted anybody. I'm just sayin'...

[Buddahaid]

Las Vegas is the only place I know where money really talks - it says, "Goodbye."

Frank Sinatra


If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt.

Dean Martin

[Eichhörnchen]

Don't get me wrong here. It's just looks weird to say something and call it a quote when it doesn't look like you quoted anybody. I'm just sayin'...

That's what made me paranoid: seeing stuff and not knowing it was quotes:) I'm better now...

[Sailor Steve]

I'm better now...
Glad to hear it. I hope to be someday, but I'm not counting on it. :dead:

[Jimbuna]

"We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up."

Phyllis Diller

[Eichhörnchen]

"All battles are fought by scared men who'd rather be someplace else"

[Kaye T. Bai]

"A man's rights rest in three boxes. The ballot box, jury box and the cartridge box. Let no man be kept from the ballot box because of his color. Let no woman be kept from the ballot box because of her sex."

- Frederick Douglass, November 15, 1867.