My daughter

[Osmium Steele]

Let me apologize up front for the wall of text.

Neal, I normally try to protect my identity to some degree, but I think my daughter's needs outweigh those concerns at the moment.

My daughter, Caitlin (http://www.facebook.com/caitlin.m.hendren), was in a horrible car accident (http://www.woodtv.com/dpp/news/local/grand_rapids/28th-street-closed-after-car-crash)Monday morning. Neither driver was impaired. Caitlin had called a friend to come and drive them to breakfast, as they were in no condition to drive. And it was her car. Ok, technically MY car, but hey...

Caitlin and Jacob were critically injured. Jacob is on the road to full recovery, though with over 100 stitches to his face, nearly every bone broken in his face as well, and many reconstructive surgeries ahead.

When we arrived at the hospital at 6:00 AM we were informed that Caitlin had suffered a massive closed head injury and was brain dead. No higher brain function, minimal, and rapidly declining brain stem activity. The machines were the only thing keeping her alive. Both the attending physician and the neurologist agreed.

They'd do another round of testing, get a 2nd opinion, but there was no hope. She was gone. Come back in 2 hours and sign the paperwork. (No, they were not that blunt, that's me)

When we got back, the docs met us and we were informed that they could not pronounce her dead as her heart had resumed beating, strongly, on its own and she was breathing above the ventilator. Not strongly enough to breathe on her own, but breathing.

It is Day 3, and she has been showing slow, but important signs of improvement. Yesterday she started responding to pain stimuli, more importantly, she started localizing. turning her head toward the source of the pain as if searching it out. Indicative of higher brain function. Reflex pulls away from pain, not search it out to stop it. She has begun making small movements, fingers, head, etc. As if her brain is restarting the circuits to test them out. Paralysis does not seem a serious concern, assuming any recovery is possible.

We are day-to-day, even from a survival standpoint right now, but I finally have some hope.

The outpouring of support from friends and family has been overwhelming. I had no idea our little Catybug had had such a positive impact on so many lives. Truly, we are surrounded by an overabundance of riches.

I ask only this of my Subsim family.

If you are a believer, pray, hard. I do not care if you pray to the Flying Spaghetti Monster to swoop down and touch her with his Noodly Appendage! :rock: Pray for recovery for Caitlin, strength for her family and friends surrounding her with love, and wisdom for the incredible medical team in whose care she as been placed. She already has prayer circles going from Spain to Austrailia, Costa Rica to Manitoba, but circling the globe couldn't hurt. :yep: We've already felt His grace settle on us.

If you are not a believer, then any thoughts or vibes you are willing to send her way are greatly appreciated. I know not all of you believe as hard as I.

Assuming she survives, it is going to be a long slog to whatever recovery she may achieve. Just goes to show, even the best doctors are only making their best guess as to what the body is capable of. Keep fighting.

All my best,

Os

[Sailor Steve]

Oh my god, I am so sorry to hear this. All any of us can do is hope that the recovery continues. My thoughts are with you. While we've never met, realize that you too have had an impact on people's lives, and you have folks you don't even know who care about you and yours.

[Tchocky]

My heart goes out to you and your family, Os. We're all thinking of you.

[Skybird]

Be patient, give it time, hold out. Best wishes for you, and her, and your family. Must be a hard time for you all. Hold out.

[Herr-Berbunch]

What Steve said!

Thoughts with you and your family at this time.

[the_tyrant]

:salute:that is a horrible thing to hear

[Arclight]

Be assured my thoughts and vibes are with her. "Keep fighting" indeed.

[Fubar2Niner]

All our thoughts are with you, your poor daughter and your family, from those of us across the pond

[mookiemookie]

Your family and your daughter are in my thoughts. Here's hoping she makes a full recovery.

[Takeda Shingen]

You'll have my thoughts and prayers, as well as those of my family. I cannot say that I know what you are going through, but I am deeply saddened by the news.

[Penguin]

All my best thoughts and wishes from deep of my heart go to your daughter, you and your family.

[CaptainHaplo]

All (family and victims) involved shall be in my prayers.

[HunterICX]

Hoping for the best for your daughter and all the best to you and your family.
Keep us posted!

HunterICX

[Garion]

I will certainly be thinking of your daughter, you and your family. With your permission I will ask my other heathen and pagan friends to do likewise.

Blessed Be

Gary

[Schroeder]

You'll be in my thoughts.
All the best for your daughter and her friend.

[August]

My sincere condolences and I will include your daughter and her boyfriend in my prayers tonight.

[eddie]

I wish all the best for your daughter, and for you and your family! Holding yourself together during a time like this, must be the hardest thing you have ever done, so keep us informed.

[CCIP]

All the best hopes for your daughter, and you and the rest of your family as well. She's got to hang in there!

[sublynx]

I noticed this message only now but felt that I wanted to say something to you and your family, Osmium Steele. Except I have no words.

I quote a poet's words instead:

Hailstones
glancing off the rocks
at Stony Pass

I wish for the best for you and your family and hope one day to see you here in the forum again

[Oberon]

She sounds a fighter, to have made such progress after being clinically 'brain-dead', I will keep her in my thoughts and prayers. Hang in there Caitlin, we're rooting for you! :yep:

[RickC Sniper]

OZ, you and Caitlin have my thoughts and my prayers.

[sharkbit]

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

I can't begin to imagine what you're going through.

[Tribesman]

I ask only this of my Subsim family.

Done.

Stay strong

[kraznyi_oktjabr]

I wish all the best for your daughter and for you and your family. I hope she recovers as fully as possible in these circumstances.

[Chad]

You and your family have my prayers as well.

Keep strong!

[joegrundman]

absolutely. What a terrible thing. I wish for the best for you all.

[u crank]

Your daughter Caitlin, her boy friend and your families will be in my thoughts and prayers.

[Osmium Steele]

I will certainly be thinking of your daughter, you and your family. With your permission I will ask my other heathen and pagan friends to do likewise.

Blessed Be

Gary

Ha! Absolutely! Mine are doing so as well. :arrgh!:

[Krauter]

I wish you and your family all the best. And to Caitlin I hope she keeps fighting as strong as ever. It will be a long road of recovery but the important thing is she is still with you.

Edit: I'll get all my Canucks to pray to Don Cherry to get her outta bed and on skates with a cup of Tims in her hand!

[Sledgehammer427]

oh no!

Prayers headed your way Os from all of my church family and I

[Cybermat47]

I'm so sorry. I'll pray for your daughter every night.

May God bless you.

[Gargamel]

Few years ago my brother in law was in a similar situation. *Severe car accident, severe head trauma. *3 other fatalities in the car. *Docs at OSU medical (premier trauma center) gave him less than 1% chance of survival and of that less than 1% chance of having any quality of life.*

Now he lives at home with his parents, can't live on his own due to memory issues (left the stove on and gutted the first floor of the house, but it needed the repairs anyways) temper problems. *But he's living at home, woks a part time job and is pretty much the same Steve we knew. *He is gay now, but we all knew that before the accident anyways, he just never admitted it.*

But there is hope. *Keep fighting.*

My thoughts and spaghetti go out to you. *

[McBeck]

Wow, I'm so sorry to hear of this. I hope she pulls through...I guess its one day at a time..

[joea]

So sorry Osmium, I will pray for Caitlin and your family, the fact she has made some progress shows there is hope. Stay strong.

[Jimbuna]

My hopes and prayers for a steady recovery.

[frau kaleun]

So sorry to hear of this, Oz. My thoughts are with you all.

[Betonov]

Hang in there.

Can't imagine what you're going trough. It's the anonimity and correctness of the members (in personal topics at least) that makes Subsim place to get this kind of things of your chest

[geetrue]

I hope this doesn't come out wrong for I pray everyday, sometimes every minute, but to understand God and God's will is not easy.

How can you understand a God that hears your prayer on sunday and the person you prayed for is dead on wedesday?

That is the God I serve in that it is His will be done.

Pray I will ... while seeking God's perfect will

The Lord be with you and comfort you in your time of need

[nikimcbee]

I can do that for you OS. Let us know what we can do for you to help. We're here for you.

[momo55]

OS ... my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
C'mon Caitlin (and her Guardian Angel) ! you can do it !

[Osmium Steele]

http://www.carepages.com/carepages/LoveOurCatybug

Registration is free. I've been updating it at least once daily. If interested, please check it out.

[nikimcbee]

Thanks for the update. Hopefully things are improving for everybody. All the best OS. Keep the faith and hold fast.:salute:

[Armistead]

You have my thoughts and prayers

[kiwi_2005]

my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Here's hoping and with faith for a quick recovery.

[Sammi79]

That is incredibly saddening news and a terrifying ordeal for you and your family OS. I do not know how to pray, so humbly I offer my hopes and wishes instead. Just maybe there will be some positive effect from mine and others sentiment be it placebo or otherwise;

Here's hoping with all my heart for a full and speedy recovery for Caitlin and her friends. Sounds like you already had the worst news you could ever expect to hear, but now you have hope and that is no small thing. The recovery signs sound very prompt and promising, place trust as I do in the doctors and in the robustness of youth.

I would also like to express my admiration for your posting here, that must have been very difficult. So here's hoping for you and your family to remain steadfast and strong together, no matter what. My thoughts are with you.

Best wishes,
Sam.

[vienna]

There are no words to express how deeply I feel for you and your familiy. To have walked out one day and feared the worst and then to find there is hope is a wrenching experience for anyone. Now that there is hope, I wish only a continued recovery for your daughter and better days for your family...

...

[CaptainMattJ.]

Thats horrible news. my deepest thoughts go out to you and your daughter.

Man, i always have a feeling that maybe it wont happen to me or the people i know, but it does, all the time, and its a horrible wake up call. These terrible accidents remind us of how dangerous the world we live in, is.

[caspofungin]

OS,

I only just saw this story, and checked out the link to your daughter's facebook page -- I'm shocked and saddened, and so so sorry for your loss. I imagine you have more important things to do than to check out these forums, but I just wanted you to know that you have my (our) deepest condolences. I can't even imagine what you're going through...

[Onkel Neal]

As the father of three daughters, I can only imagine the struggle your family is facing. My thoughts and best hopes go out to you and Caitlin.

Neal

[joea]

OS,

I only just saw this story, and checked out the link to your daughter's facebook page -- I'm shocked and saddened, and so so sorry for your loss. I imagine you have more important things to do than to check out these forums, but I just wanted you to know that you have my (our) deepest condolences. I can't even imagine what you're going through...
Well I just did as well-I'm speechless. So sorry.

[HunterICX]

^+1

May she rest now in peace :(

My sincere condolences OS

HunterICX

[Jimbuna]

Please accept my sincerest condolences for your tragic loss, I have a daughter the same age and cannot begin to understand how you and your family must be feeling right now.

You are all in my thoughts and prayers.

[Tribesman]

Deepest sympathy for your tragic loss.

[sublynx]

My condolences to you and your family

[Gerald]

My deepest condolences for you and your family,I'm very sorry for the tragic loss!

[Dowly]

My condolences. :cry:

[Garion]

My condolences to you and your family, as a father of 3 girls and 1 son (deceased) I feel your pain.

My son died aged 9 when he ran out onto the road in 1988, he would have been in his mid 30's now.

All I can say is come together as a family and greive. My wife and I found help in a group that was set up to deal with the loss of a child and though the pain never goes away, it does get .... well .. I wont say better.. but...

PM me if you feel the need to rage, rant or just want to talk talk to someone that has been throught this.

Regards

Gary

[Herr-Berbunch]

Don't know how I can follow Gary's post ^.

My sincerest condolences to you and your family, OS.

[CaptainHaplo]

As a father of 2, I also can't imagine. My thoughts and prayers are with you. May she find peace in the hand of the Creator.

[Penguin]

My condolences. May she rest in peace.

http://imageshack.us/a/img823/9666/rosexg.jpg

[Takeda Shingen]

My condolences to you and your loved ones.

[kraznyi_oktjabr]

My condolences to you and your family. :(

[Onkel Neal]

I am so sorry for your loss. Nothing anyone can say will really help, but stay strong. Remember her and treasure her memory. She was a beautiful person and a lot of people are better for her being in their lives.

[Skybird]

a pond between trees
reflecting the sky
soul moves
wind over water
waves, circles
reflected sky again

Now is your time of mourning. I'm sorry about the ending of this story. But there will come a time when you need to let go, in the future. I hope you do not miss when it comes.

[AVGWarhawk]

I'm sorry for the passing of your daughter OS. Continue to be a strong father to Caitlin. Be strong for your family. God Bless.

[Schroeder]

I'm so sorry to hear this.
May she rest in peace.

[vienna]

As I said before, there really are no words; my thoughts are with you and your family...

...

[momo55]

I wish you and your family very much strenght.
My condolences

[mookiemookie]

I'm sorry to hear this. My sincere condolences.

[u crank]

Very sad news.

My sincere condolences to you and your family.

[Kloef]

My sincere condolences.

I don't know what to say, only that i wish you and your family all the strength you'll need to get through this..

[Nippelspanner]

This is heartbreaking...
Im deeply sorry for your loss...

[Fubar2Niner]

Just seen this heartbreaking news.

My and my families sincere and deepest condolences OS. You and your family are in our hearts and thoughts, a tragic and wasteful loss.

http://i291.photobucket.com/albums/ll293/fubar2niner/Untitled_zps813515d5.jpg

Sincerely.

Fubar2Niner

[soopaman2]

My deepest heartfelt sympathies.

I now pray for your healing.

So sad, what a beautiful girl. :(

[Kpt. Lehmann]

I am so very sorry to hear of your daughter's passing, OS.

Prayers from Texas. God bless you and your family.

http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f117/KptLehmann/wreath.jpg

[NeonSamurai]

Wow that is indeed horrible news, a parent's worst nightmare. I sincerely hope you and your family will have access the help and support you will need to come to terms with this horrible tragedy. If I can be of some help let me know.

[sharkbit]

Wow.
My heartfelt condolences. You and your family are in our prayers.

[Kaye T. Bai]

I'm shocked. I am so sorry for your loss. Please, you have my condolences. :(

[danny60]

My sincere condolences for your loss, stay strong and keep her memories close to your heart.

May she forever have Fair Winds and Following Seas,

[danasan]

This is so heartbreaking.

My sincere condolences for your loss.

[Highbury]

My sincere condolences.

[Sharkstooth]

I am so sorry to hear of this terrible tragedy.
I visited her page and saw a beautiful young woman who is now in Gods arms. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

[Falkirion]

Been away too long from this community. My condolences OS. No parent deserves to have their children taken from them

[tater]

I just found this thread and it made me feel physically ill. I'm so terribly sorry for your loss.

[JU_88]

Im almost speechless- this is the sadest thread I have ever read on Subsim.
I cant even begin to imagine the feeling of losing a child. Im really deeply sorry for both you and everyone effected by her terrible loss. :nope: