mookiemookie
04-11-11, 03:51 PM
...a train operator who had been driving trains for well over 20 years. Over the course of his career, he had experienced a number of close calls in the accident department. At long last, sadly, he hit a schoolbus full of children on its way out of the elementary school parking lot, killing every single one of them.
Unsurprisingly, he was put on trial for a number of counts of manslaughter in the first degree. After several hours of deliberation, he was convicted and the judge sentenced him to death by means of the electric chair.
For his last meal, the unskilled train driver requested his grandmother's homemade macaroni and cheese. The warden of his temporarily assigned prison was hesitant at first, but eventually agreed that it was the least he could do for the man who was going to die in a few hours.
After scarfing down his grandmother's meal and saying his goodbyes, the man was brought to the electric chair. The executioner strapped him in and threw the switch. Three times they tried to electrocute the man. Three times it failed. Not knowing what to do, the befuddled executioner unstrapped him and led him out of the room to attempt a different means of execution.
On the way out, the veteran guard at the door insisted on asking the man how he had possibly survived the electric chair. In all his years of working, he had never seen a single person survive such a fate. He asked: "How'd you do it, man? Was it your grandmother's macaroni? Are you some sort of messiah? What's your secret?"
The man shrugged his shoulders, scratched his head, and thought for a moment. Finally, he replied:
"No secret. I suppose I'm just a bad conductor, that's all."
Unsurprisingly, he was put on trial for a number of counts of manslaughter in the first degree. After several hours of deliberation, he was convicted and the judge sentenced him to death by means of the electric chair.
For his last meal, the unskilled train driver requested his grandmother's homemade macaroni and cheese. The warden of his temporarily assigned prison was hesitant at first, but eventually agreed that it was the least he could do for the man who was going to die in a few hours.
After scarfing down his grandmother's meal and saying his goodbyes, the man was brought to the electric chair. The executioner strapped him in and threw the switch. Three times they tried to electrocute the man. Three times it failed. Not knowing what to do, the befuddled executioner unstrapped him and led him out of the room to attempt a different means of execution.
On the way out, the veteran guard at the door insisted on asking the man how he had possibly survived the electric chair. In all his years of working, he had never seen a single person survive such a fate. He asked: "How'd you do it, man? Was it your grandmother's macaroni? Are you some sort of messiah? What's your secret?"
The man shrugged his shoulders, scratched his head, and thought for a moment. Finally, he replied:
"No secret. I suppose I'm just a bad conductor, that's all."