Platapus
01-07-11, 09:12 PM
Times being tough, I have decided to take a part time job writing greeting card sayings for Hallmark. It does not pay much but I can do it on my own time.
Hallmark, first wants me to send some samples of my writings.
Wadda think of these card sayings:
My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat.
When I looked at the tire...
I noticed your cat.
Sorry!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~
Heard your wife left you, how upset you must be.
But don't fret about it... She moved in with me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
Looking back over the years that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder... 'What the hell was I thinking?'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love
After having met you .. I've changed my mind.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me.
################################################## ###############
Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...
Would you like to take this knife out of my back?
You'll probably need it again.
************************************************** *****************************************
When we were together, you always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up, I think it's time you kept your promise.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
We have been friends for a very long time ..
let's say we stop?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ +++++++
I'm so miserable without you,
it's almost like you're here.
================================================== =======
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was?
Think I have a shot at the job?
:D
Hallmark, first wants me to send some samples of my writings.
Wadda think of these card sayings:
My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat.
When I looked at the tire...
I noticed your cat.
Sorry!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~
Heard your wife left you, how upset you must be.
But don't fret about it... She moved in with me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
Looking back over the years that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder... 'What the hell was I thinking?'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love
After having met you .. I've changed my mind.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me.
################################################## ###############
Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...
Would you like to take this knife out of my back?
You'll probably need it again.
************************************************** *****************************************
When we were together, you always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up, I think it's time you kept your promise.
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
We have been friends for a very long time ..
let's say we stop?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ +++++++
I'm so miserable without you,
it's almost like you're here.
================================================== =======
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was?
Think I have a shot at the job?
:D