View Full Version : My wife is being unreasonable. Need advice
Telemon
11-30-10, 08:30 AM
Greetings from frozen England.
I need advice. My wife is being unreasonable.
I’m playing SH3/GWX and I’m trying for full realism.
Last night it dawned on me that although ‘in game’ it was Feb ’40 in mid Atlantic with 15mtrs + winds here was I sitting in my warm (60F/20C) corner in the lounge with bikkies and hot cocoa to hand.
This was not right, not real, faked, I was a hypocrite!!
I went upstairs and put on my cold weather gear, sou’wester and rubber boots. Came down and opened wide the patio door. This was more like it. minus 4C and a bit of wind and snow. Soon there was a film if ice on my cocoa. But it still didn’t feel quite realistic enough so I asked my wife to go out and fetch a bucket of water from the pond and throw it over me. This was it; true realism.
For some reason now she’s a bit niggled, sniffling and the silence is deafening.
How can I convince her that we submariners take our game seriously?
Greetings from frozen England.
I need advice. My wife is being unreasonable.
I’m playing SH3/GWX and I’m trying for full realism.
Last night it dawned on me that although ‘in game’ it was Feb ’40 in mid Atlantic with 15mtrs + winds here was I sitting in my warm (60F/20C) corner in the lounge with bikkies and hot cocoa to hand.
This was not right, not real, faked, I was a hypocrite!!
I went upstairs and put on my cold weather gear, sou’wester and rubber boots. Came down and opened wide the patio door. This was more like it. minus 4C and a bit of wind and snow. Soon there was a film if ice on my cocoa. But it still didn’t feel quite realistic enough so I asked my wife to go out and fetch a bucket of water from the pond and throw it over me. This was it; true realism.
For some reason now she’s a bit niggled, sniffling and the silence is deafening.
How can I convince her that we submariners take our game seriously?
Sometimes,just sometimes :har: ....it doesn't feel.... :haha: right :rotfl2:
May I suggest a divorce mate? You could then turn you're whole house into a big refrigerator and put some red lamps everywhere. :arrgh!:
Well, the more simpler option would be to set sail for Africa with you're Kaleun, but surely the less fun one? :smug:
frau kaleun
11-30-10, 08:47 AM
Refuse to allow her in the room while you are playing, citing the longheld belief that a woman on board your boat will anger the sea gods. Unless the sea is already angry, in which case you should demand that she only enter the room if completely naked.
I would also suggest that you refuse to bathe, shave, or change your underwear for the duration of your patrol. I think this will add the kind of hardcore immersion you're looking for and show her just how seriously you take your subsimming.
As an added bonus, by the time you get back to base she will probably have run off with a flashy and much better-smelling fighter pilot. Realism!
Kpt. Lehmann
11-30-10, 09:00 AM
If none of those suggestions work... you should spank her!
:timeout:
But then again, she may like that! :D
< SWAPISHHHH!!!! Who's yer Kapitan babeh!?! Who's yer Kapitan??? SWAPISHHH!!! >
< Why YOU ARE my Kapitan! You are my love!!! Smoochie! SMOOCHEH!!! >
:arrgh!:
Sailor Steve
11-30-10, 09:38 AM
You might as well follow Frau K's advice, as it's a lost cause anyway. Even if you take good care of yourself sooner or later you'll come home to find the letter:
"Dear Johann..."
Me? Cynical? No way! Depressive and fatalistic, sure...
Herr-Berbunch
11-30-10, 09:50 AM
It's all in the biccies, you'll need to leave them in alternatively in a warm, damp place, then a cold damp place (removed from wrappings), for three weeks, then enjoy...! :D
Divorce could make you out to be the loser, so I suggest a word in the *party member's* ear mentioning her comments about how the war would be inevitably lost, and how nice that von Stauffenberg was. :yeah:
Having already gone so far towards total realism, you may as well go all the way:
http://webarchive.nationalarchives.gov.uk/20101001110155/http://www.royalnavy.mod.uk/careers/how-to-join/
This also comes with the bonus of reversing the effect that your hobby has on your relation with women - for some odd reason they seem to like actual sailors a lot more than bank accountants pretending to be sailors. Don't know why, maybe it's the uniform thing...
Mittelwaechter
11-30-10, 10:31 AM
BE MORE AGGRESSIVE!
Obviously her chain from the kitchen is too long.
irish1958
11-30-10, 11:09 AM
PM me for the telephone number of my law firm Cheetem, Screwwwwem, Swindle, and O'Fraudly.
A letter from them should settle the matter and get her back in the kitchen where she belongs. For further insurance against her invading your privacy, scatter glass fragments in front of your man-cave, so she will cut her feet if she tries to enter. (I assume you have already followed the dictum to keep her barefoot and pregnant and in the kitchen.)
derrinurban
11-30-10, 11:51 AM
First mates can be so tempermental.:DL
Perhaps a week of extra duties or maybe have her confined to her rack (just in case you need a break).;)
Jimbuna
11-30-10, 05:01 PM
I can recommend a good geordie firm of solicitors...Hadaway and Sh!te :DL
Sailor Steve
11-30-10, 09:23 PM
Ahem. My card.
CARD:
Sailor Steve, Attorney At Large.
Dewey, Cheatham and Howe
Serving your Legal Needs. Ambulances chased for a small extra fee.
http://www.subsim.com/phpBB_archive1/viewtopic.php?t=26613
NightCrawler
11-30-10, 09:50 PM
There is a saying here in US, just give her "DICK", than smoke than she can clean the dishes, and you can play SHIII....
NightCrawler
11-30-10, 10:09 PM
Greetings from frozen England.
I need advice. My wife is being unreasonable.
I’m playing SH3/GWX and I’m trying for full realism.
Last night it dawned on me that although ‘in game’ it was Feb ’40 in mid Atlantic with 15mtrs + winds here was I sitting in my warm (60F/20C) corner in the lounge with bikkies and hot cocoa to hand.
This was not right, not real, faked, I was a hypocrite!!
I went upstairs and put on my cold weather gear, sou’wester and rubber boots. Came down and opened wide the patio door. This was more like it. minus 4C and a bit of wind and snow. Soon there was a film if ice on my cocoa. But it still didn’t feel quite realistic enough so I asked my wife to go out and fetch a bucket of water from the pond and throw it over me. This was it; true realism.
For some reason now she’s a bit niggled, sniffling and the silence is deafening.
How can I convince her that we submariners take our game seriously?
When was your last drug-test???? make appointment tomorrow....
J/K....
CodyLang
12-01-10, 04:07 AM
BE MORE AGGRESSIVE!
Obviously her chain from the kitchen is too long.
HAHAHAHA
If none of those suggestions work... you should spank her!
:timeout:
But then again, she may like that! :D
< SWAPISHHHH!!!! Who's yer Kapitan babeh!?! Who's yer Kapitan??? SWAPISHHH!!! >
< Why YOU ARE my Kapitan! You are my love!!! Smoochie! SMOOCHEH!!! >
:arrgh!:You're in for a shock now you are married.:O:
irish1958
12-01-10, 09:40 AM
Telemon
Good news. I have found the perfect Christmas gift for her although it is quite expensive.:DL
A pink ladies nine piece tool set with a cute vinyl case for $9.99 (USD):woot:
I know this is a lot to spend but she deserves it.:salute:
As a side effect, she will now leave your tools alone (pun intended).:arrgh!:
frau kaleun
12-01-10, 09:50 AM
A pink ladies nine piece tool set with a cute vinyl case for $9.99 (USD):woot:
Is it Stanley? Is it Craftsman? If not, DO NOT WANT!
My daddy taught me to buy Stanley or Craftsman, so I buy Stanley cuz for Craftsman I'd have to go to Sears (yuck). Yes I know there are other quality brands of tools around but I'm not talking major power tools here, just your basic screwdrivers/wrenches/hammers/etc.
What I would suggest is this:
1. Put your u-boat in a box.
2. Make her open that box.
3. ????
4. Profit!
Jimbuna
12-01-10, 10:55 AM
Better still....take her back to the mother-in-law and confine her to 'house arrest'...problem solved http://www.psionguild.org/forums/images/smilies/wolfsmilies/wolfcop.gif
Hans Uberman
12-01-10, 02:45 PM
Turn one room into the radio room and let her chat with friends using the "communications gear" all day. Enigma machine is optional, as she isn't likely to say anything classified, and the enemy may stop listening in altogether after a short time.
Jimbuna
12-01-10, 04:46 PM
Turn one room into the radio room and let her chat with friends using the "communications gear" all day. Enigma machine is optional, as she isn't likely to say anything classified, and the enemy may stop listening in altogether after a short time.
LOL :DL
How can I convince her that we submariners take our game seriously?
Well, for starters it ain't February yet. Unless you make sure you start your patrols on the exact date that the patrol starts in-game, you're just a poser. Us REAL diehards even wait years before playing so the day of the week lines up. I've lost quite a few jobs over it, but it does make immersion that much better. I've even set up a small metal shed in my backyard that I set my computer up in. It's dank, humid, freaking cold in the winter, but by god I'm living the experience.
Better yet... get her a computer and get her playing SHIII. Then you can toss freezing water on each other, play SHIII. Then you'll have a perfectly good reason to warm up together after you "save" for the night, under those red lights you both installed.
Kinky?
Yes. :D
frau kaleun
12-02-10, 08:35 PM
Better yet... get her a computer and get her playing SHIII. Then you can toss freezing water on each other, play SHIII. Then you'll have a perfectly good reason to warm up together after you "save" for the night, under those red lights you both installed.
Kinky?
Yes. :D
I am intrigued by your ideas, and would like to subscribe to your newsletter. :D
Madox58
12-02-10, 08:46 PM
So, since she would be pretending to be a Man in Game,
does that carry over?
:hmmm:
NEVER MIND!
I don't want to know!!!
:o
frau kaleun
12-02-10, 09:47 PM
Don't ask, don't tell.
danzig70
12-03-10, 01:55 PM
You could have her girlfriends over and be a Multi-Playa.
Herr-Berbunch
12-03-10, 02:42 PM
You could have her girlfriends over and be a Multi-Playa.
Dude! Did you not read Privateer's post? :nope:
Jimbuna
12-05-10, 01:57 PM
So, since she would be pretending to be a Man in Game,
does that carry over?
:hmmm:
NEVER MIND!
I don't want to know!!!
:o
ROFLMAO...Deja Vu :DL
Canovaro
12-09-10, 01:44 PM
Funniest thread ever :haha:
Subsimming and women, it's always a bad combo.
Max_Schnell
12-09-10, 02:33 PM
I have found that the best way to deal with the Mrs. vs. SHIII issue is this.
I will pause or even stop the sim.
Then give her my undivided attention, and I mean UNDIVIDED! I'll make myself available to her relentlessy. I'll talk to her constantly, make myself underfoot while she is doing whatever she is doing. I constantly inquire about her day, her work, her friends, how's the car running, what are future holiday plans, how are the puppies, I was thinking this, or how about this, until she finally relents.:timeout:
The 15-20 minutes it takes to perform these actions will usually free me up for weeks to play my beloved sim (my beloved sim, my friend, my partner....my secret lover.....Uhmm.. I mean...) then when all is said and done she gladly does whatever is requested so that I'll go away and leave her alone, upto and including opening the windows, flinging the salty water and what-not.
She can only blame herself, I learned all of this from her.:yep:
Good luck friend :yeah:
Schnell!
Jack Cutter
12-09-10, 02:36 PM
LMAO! :har:
These tactics have been noted, and I will study them intently. I can't wait to put these to test in the field. Thank you Max! :salute:
Gargamel
12-09-10, 10:13 PM
Funniest thread ever :haha:
Subsimming and women, it's always a bad combo.
:o
Don't let FK hear you say that.......
Hanomag
12-10-10, 11:43 AM
Subsimming and women, it's always a bad combo.
I am now zipping my upper lip.... :o
frau kaleun
12-10-10, 12:09 PM
I am now zipping my upper lip.... :o
http://www.subsim.com/radioroom/picture.php?albumid=144&pictureid=1300
Hanomag
12-10-10, 12:23 PM
http://www.subsim.com/radioroom/picture.php?albumid=144&pictureid=1300
Hmmm.. pyschic Kaluen... :hmmm:
Jimbuna
12-10-10, 05:11 PM
http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/9652/wizardbehindcurtain.jpg
Canovaro
12-13-10, 10:45 AM
I Apologize.
:ping:
Hanomag
12-13-10, 10:53 AM
I have found that the best way to deal with the Mrs. vs. SHIII issue is this.
I will pause or even stop the sim.
Then give her my undivided attention, and I mean UNDIVIDED! I'll make myself available to her relentlessy. I'll talk to her constantly, make myself underfoot while she is doing whatever she is doing. I constantly inquire about her day, her work, her friends, how's the car running, what are future holiday plans, how are the puppies, I was thinking this, or how about this, until she finally relents.:timeout:
The 15-20 minutes it takes to perform these actions will usually free me up for weeks to play my beloved sim (my beloved sim, my friend, my partner....my secret lover.....Uhmm.. I mean...) then when all is said and done she gladly does whatever is requested so that I'll go away and leave her alone, upto and including opening the windows, flinging the salty water and what-not.
She can only blame herself, I learned all of this from her.:yep:
Good luck friend :yeah:
Schnell!
LMFAO!!! :rotfl2:
vBulletin® v3.8.11, Copyright ©2000-2025, vBulletin Solutions Inc.