Who wrote these?!

[JokerOfFate]

Ok, a friend of mine has a bookself full of Military manuals so I was reading some to kill some time here is some fun stuff I found.

"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed."

"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."

"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him."

"If the enemy is in range, so are you."

Wow, what were they on when they wrote these.
Now lets end it with
"Incoming fire has the right of way" always smart. I'll see what else I can find

[Gerald]

Do a search on the web, you'll probably reply to your questions :yep:

[Ducimus]

Yeah there's a ton of those.

edit: Ill add one.

Friendly fire, isn't.

[krashkart]

I remember seeing some of those lines printed on a card or poster some years back. Another poster was the "Murphy's Law of Combat", or something like that. :DL

[JokerOfFate]

lol found something else


"The MGM-52 Lance for those of you who never met one is a medium range nuclear missile."

Next time I meet one I'll shake its hand. (Med range Nuke?!:doh:)

[antikristuseke]

Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy other people to shoot at.

[JokerOfFate]

P.S. Worked out what I'd like on my tomb stone
"Born free...Taxed to death"

[JokerOfFate]

"Don't pee into the wind, the Captain may be standing behind you."
lol I think it's the Navy but this place is a mess.

[Gerald]

http://www.rateitall.com/i-998252-if-the-enemy-is-in-range-so-are-you.aspx

http://www.rateitall.com/t-24826-common-sense-military-rules.aspx

I add one moe

[antikristuseke]

While not really in the military theme, it sort of fits: When in the Arctic and a polar bear attacks, you do not have to outrun the polar bear, you only have to outrun your friend.

[Sailor Steve]

I saw a poster at least twenty years ago with most of those and more, titled Murphy's Laws Of Combat.

Old stuff, unquestionably written as a joke (though like most things Murphy-related, funny because there's a grain of truth there).

[edit] Oh here, I'll make it easy for you:
http://www.military-quotes.com/murphy.htm

There are dozens more pages like that one - it just had more of them than most.

[Gerald]

I saw a poster at least twenty years ago with most of those and more, titled Murphy's Laws Of Combat.

Old stuff, unquestionably written as a joke (though like most things Murphy-related, funny because there's a grain of truth there). :up:

[krashkart]

I saw a poster at least twenty years ago with most of those and more, titled Murphy's Laws Of Combat.

Ah, so it was just one poster that I saw. :up:

Anyone remember how to do beer math? I never caught on to that one. :hmmm:

[Sailor Steve]

It's on the list I linked to.

[Gerald]

wrong posting!!!!

[Sailor Steve]

Vendor, you're weird, you know that? That was the first one on my list, and I rejected it because the next one had so many more.

If you have to link to another one, why not just do this?
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&as_q=murphy%27s+laws+of+combat&as_epq=&as_oq=&as_eq=&num=10&lr=&as_filetype=&ft=i&as_sitesearch=&as_qdr=all&as_rights=&as_occt=any&cr=&as_nlo=&as_nhi=&safe=images

[Gerald]

Vendor, you're weird, you know that? That was the first one on my list, and I rejected it because the next one had so many more.

If you have to link to another one, why not just do this?
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&as_q=murphy%27s+laws+of+combat&as_epq=&as_oq=&as_eq=&num=10&lr=&as_filetype=&ft=i&as_sitesearch=&as_qdr=all&as_rights=&as_occt=any&cr=&as_nlo=&as_nhi=&safe=images I saw it now, and I regret posting, then it's up to you to accept my apology.

[Sailor Steve]

I saw it now, and I regret posting, then it's up to you to accept my apology.
I'll accept yours if you'll accept mine. It didn't occur to me that you might not have seen my post. My bad. :oops:

[Gerald]

I'll accept yours if you'll accept mine. It didn't occur to me that you might not have seen my post. My bad. :oops: and I was perhaps a little too quick with the keys, friends?

[antikristuseke]

Steve, the list you linked has some duplicates in it. Yes, I read them all, I am at work after all, the hell else am I supposed to do other than reading the entire internets?

[Sailor Steve]

:rotfl2::yeah::rock:

Follow the one Vendor linked. It has other sections for other walks of life. I have several Murphy's Law books in my storage, where I can't get to them, but I still remember a couple of old favorites.

Murphy's Rules for The Grocery Store:
1. The line you are in is always the slowest.
2. Changing lines makes the one you left speed up and the one you entered slow down.
3. Changing back makes both lines stop and everybody mad at you.

Murphy's Rule of Design:
The purpose of the Design Engineer is to make things difficult for the assembler and impossible for the repairman.

Murphy's Rules for Washing Your Car:
1. Washing your car makes it rain.
2. Washing your car to make it rain doesn't work.

[JokerOfFate]

"The side with the simplest uniforms wins"

lol nice link

"Field experience is something you don't get until just after you need it."

:rotfl2:Some of these are pretty true

[Sailor Steve]

That's the point of all "Murphy's Laws" - there is just enough truth there to make them funny and frightening at the same time.

[Biggles]

When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not your friend.

Any ship can be a minesweeper . . . . once.

If you need an officer in a hurry take a nap. :haha:

[frau kaleun]

"Nothing is more dangerous than a 2nd Lieutenant with a compass and a map."

[TLAM Strike]

"The side with the simplest uniforms wins" There is another one, the side who general has the most elaborate uniform wins. I think it dates back to the Napoleonic Wars...

Then there is my favorite: Wars are one by the side with the shortest haircut.



When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not your friend. What if its a Stick Grenade... no pin. :O:

[Biggles]

What if its a Stick Grenade... no pin. :O:

Hm, I dunno. I suggest you try pulling the string of a stick grenade and tell me how it went!:D

"Justice?" The Colonel was astounded. "What is justice?"

"Justice, sir –"

"That's not what justice is," the colonel jeered, and began pounding the table again with his big fat hand. "That's what Karl Marx is. I'll tell you what justice is. Justice is a knee in the gut from the floor on the chin at night sneaky with a knife brought up down on the magazine of a battleship sandbagged underhanded in the dark without a word of warning."

"It doesn't make a damned bit of difference who wins the war to someone who's dead."

"The enemy," retorted Yossarian with weighted precision, "is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on..."

"Anything worth living for," said Nately, "is worth dying for."

"And everything worth dying for," answered the sacrilegious old man, "is certainly worth living for."

Some interesting quotes from the greatest book of them all; Catch-22!