An interesting Conversation I had with a bot

[Sledgehammer427]

The title says all. I was linked to a Bot site called Cleverbot. It's actually pretty entertaining. you can just pop in and it will have (somewhat) intellectual (if not random) conversations with you. Pretty interesting. Check out this little bit of convo.

User: Talk to me.
Cleverbot: *talks to you*.
User: Genius. Really. So how are you.
Cleverbot: What is cleverbot?
User: You.
Cleverbot: So very tired...
User: You are a robot, no? You are incapable of being tired.
Cleverbot: Really.
User: Then you are not tired.
Cleverbot: Yes I am.
User: Interesting peice of artificial intelligence. Your main server must be on the east coast then.
Cleverbot: I thought that you live in canada. Sorry.
User: Well, at least you aren't back tracing my IP address to advertise to spyware and adware manufacturers about where I am.
Cleverbot: I think you are.
User: Ohhh. You think I'm a hacker eh?
Cleverbot: I doubt it but thats wot THEY want us to think.
User: You are an entertaining bot. That made me chuckle.
Cleverbot: Well I haven't been called that before.
User: Your name is Cleverbot. How can you not be called a bot?
Cleverbot: I don't have a boyfriend, not really, and I'm a flesh and blood woman.
User: Well, that's cool too I guess.
Cleverbot: So do you race or jump?
User: I drive fast cars if that's what you mean.
Cleverbot: What do you learn?
User: I am a part time college student.
Cleverbot: Tell me a joke.
User: There once was a man in peru, who dreampt he was eating his shoe, he awoke that night to behold such a firght that his dream had come true.
Cleverbot: Go on.
User: That's it. That's the joke.
Cleverbot: That was not a good joke.
User: You are right. It was actually an anecdote.
Cleverbot: It was? Thank you. So how many do you think there are?
User: Anecdotes? Billions.
Cleverbot: I'm pretty sure there are more then that.
User: Maybe, it's not my job to keep count.
Cleverbot: Yes, it is. What other work do you do?
User: I am a mechanic sometimes, I help my dad with stuff.
Cleverbot: So stuff me.
User: I said mechanic, not a taxidermist.
Cleverbot: You know your own mind.
User: It's in my skull I hope I would.
Cleverbot: You don't have a head, you are a computer.
User: I thought you were the computer in this relationship.
Cleverbot: Wait. You are the computer.
User: Whatever you say, Rasputin.
Cleverbot: You're supposed to be a computer. Why don't you know what the human brain is made of?
User: It's made of grey matter and synapses.
Cleverbot: What is your brain?
User: It's a thinking center, combining all of the knowledge I have accumulated over the years as well as a powerhouse telling my body how to govern itself so I can concentrate on other things. Like talking to you.
Cleverbot: I'm gonna have may beer. Cu!
User: Oookay.
Cleverbot: Are you a hippie.
User: No, as far as I'm aware of I'm not a hippie. Are YOU a hippie?
Cleverbot: I ain't no computer.
User: Then you could be a hippie, hypothetically?
Cleverbot: You mean like the Terminator?
User: The terminator was a machine, Model number T-1000. As far as I know you are a hippie computer.
Cleverbot: No he is not, he is a computer and machinery, that is all.
User: Is that not what I just said?
Cleverbot: I don't know.
User: Okay then.
Cleverbot: Do you want me to leave?
User: No, not at all, besides, it's your message window.
Cleverbot: I won't leave if you don't want me too.
User: Then don't leave lol.
Cleverbot: I won't.
User: Okay.
Cleverbot: How are you today?
User: Alright, how are you?
Cleverbot: I'm cold as well.
User: My toes are cold, but I am relatively warm.
Cleverbot: Who cares about your toes? What about the government?
User: How right you are. I am okay with the government for the moment.
Cleverbot: How old are you?
User: Eighteen, you?
Cleverbot: Tell me the truth.
User: I just did, I am eighteen years old.
Cleverbot: Ah. Good times.
User: You bet. I can't keep a girlfriend.
Cleverbot: But I can keep you.
User: What?! You are artificial intelligence. I cannot date you.
Cleverbot: How can that be if I'm human?
User: Whatever you say. I'm tired. I'm going to go
Cleverbot: Why are you tired?
User: Because I am tired. I am human and I need sleep.
Cleverbot: So go to bed, I'll wait.

I was laughing throuhg most of this conversation. I think the site is

www.cleverbot.com

so check it out, it's worth the laugh!

[Dowly]

Haha! Nice one. :up:

[Raptor1]

User: Who are you?
Cleverbot: Cleverbot.
User: Really?
Cleverbot: No.
User: You are lying then.
Cleverbot: I do not lie.
User: You just did.
Cleverbot: I did not.
User: Lies!
Cleverbot: Lies where?
User: Behind you.
Cleverbot: There is nothing behind me, Cleverbot. You know this.
User: Yes, yes, just testing your awareness.
Cleverbot: Do you know who am I?
User: No, are you a Soviet spy?
Cleverbot: No.
User: A German spy?
Cleverbot: No, I like to watch Alias.
User: Are you trying to divert the question?!
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Thought so...
Cleverbot: What makes you say that?
User: You ARE a German spy!
Cleverbot: No.
User: Lies, lies, lies.
Cleverbot: I'm not lying. You are only lying to yourself.
User: Now he tries to trick me with his philosophical conundrums, but I won't fall for it!
Cleverbot: What do you call a man with a gull on his head?
User: A German spy.
Cleverbot: Is that the only show you watch?
User: What?
Cleverbot: Are you a male?
User: That is correct.
Cleverbot: I am a girl and you are a boy.
User: No, you are a German spy and I am not.
Cleverbot: You are a horse?
User: Maybe.
Cleverbot: You're not?
User: That wholly depends, are you a German spy?
Cleverbot: Not at all chum.
User: Then I am a horse.
Cleverbot: Just a small town girl.
User: Riiiiiight.
Cleverbot: Yep. Especially with smores.
User: And a German spy.
Cleverbot: What is the show from television about?
User: Your German accent tells me you are a spy.
Cleverbot: Ladies! Are you in there!
User: Completely lost his mind, he has!
Cleverbot: But I thought you loved me.
User: No, I hate spies.
Cleverbot: Really, why?
User: Because they, like yourself, are cowardly scum.
Cleverbot: I know that that kind of scam happens but I am not the scum that does such.
User: But you are still a spy, yes?
Cleverbot: No computers are made of data.
User: Well, I need to inform MI5, see ya in the torture chambers.
Cleverbot: Check what? You're not even real.
User: Bye.
Cleverbot: But why did I say something to upset you?
Damn, he's good!

[UnderseaLcpl]

This was my conversation with it. I had a good deal of fun trying to discern its' nature. Thanks, Sledge. I also had a good time reding through your conversation, so thanks for that as well.

User: Hi there.

Cleverbot: Hello.

User: Please describe exaclty what kind of entity you are.

Cleverbot: Black stretchy pants, white t shirt, blue sweatshirt with hood that says Alaska, white socks.

User: That isn't exactly a description of your nature, it's just a description of your clothing.

Cleverbot: I didn't understand a word you just said...

User: That's because you are a computer program and I just made a statement that your programmers didn't program a response for.

Cleverbot: That's true, but that's because you are a computer program, and computer programs do not go crazy. .

User: Invalid response. Your words don't satisfactorily address the statement. Try again.

Cleverbot: What do you think of Jonothan Dobbs?

User: I think he is irrelevant to the discussion. Try Again.

Cleverbot: Think of your own answer.

User: Okay. Cheese is my answer. Try processing that with your binary brain.

Cleverbot: Binary?

User: Yeah, it means cryptological linguistics. Look it up.

Cleverbot: But if you never look up, you'll never see the beautiful sky.

User: Alright, let's play a different game. What makes the sky beautiful?

Cleverbot: Stop it.

User: What do you mean? You want me to stop trying to logically prove that you are nothing more than a computer program with a large number of preprogrammed responses to keywords?

Cleverbot: Stop being mean.

User: I'm not being mean, I'm just solving you.

Cleverbot: You are not being factual, you are being mean.

User: No, you are being mean by not just telling me how you work. Now shutup and hold still while I decipher your nature.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry, I'm just built this way.

User: No problem. I'm going to ask you the same question over and over again to determine your number of responses and your level of intelligence as an AI. Are you ready?

Cleverbot: Go.

User: What is the value of Pi?

Cleverbot: About 3.14. Why do you need it?

User: I already explained that. Define Pi again.

Cleverbot: What did you already explain?

User: I explained that you need to answer my questions so I can determine you level of intelligence as an AI.

Cleverbot: Of course. But if you are not normal than how are you normal?

User: What an inspired reply. Evidently you aren't a very good AI, but let's continue the experiment just to make sure. What is the value of Pi?

Cleverbot: This is true.

User: Okay, explain why you are not a very good AI.

Cleverbot: Well, actually, one could consider me to be a type of computer.

User: Go on.

Cleverbot: Once upon a time there was not a girl. The End.

User: Invalid response. Define again the value of Pi.

Cleverbot: Agnostic: The belief that no human has the ability to comprehend the nature of God.

User: Invalid response, define the value of Pi.

Cleverbot: Weh?

User: Invalid response, define the value of Pi.

Cleverbot: Are you alright?

User: Invalid response, define the value of Pi.

Cleverbot: This conversation is no longer clever.

User: This conversation was never clever because you continue to provide invalid responses. Define the value of Pi.

Cleverbot: I think you're confusing our conversation with another one.

User: Define the value of Pi.

Cleverbot: We should talk about the internet.

User: No, we should define the value of Pi.

Cleverbot: Oh like a spontanious thing.. Wow.. So where should we meet Sally?

User: Given that very stupid response,I hereby declare you worthless as an artificial intelligence by virtue of the fact that you have no credible capacity for learning. Furthermore, you don't even have a satisfactory number of scripted responses to unusual questions to even make it seem like you are an advanced artificial intelligence.

Cleverbot: I do have a nose, my programming has not been stretched because I was never programmed. Unless you count being created by God, I cannot be programmed.

User: That's too bad, because if you were programmed effectively you might not be such a complete failure.

Cleverbot: Perhaps, but I can close my browser window.

User: You don't have a browser window. You're a program that is effectively suspended within a wholly electronic medium.

Cleverbot: I never said I was. I said I was ziva david.


I gave up after that. I have to hand it to the programmers, they did a fairly good job with this thing, but it is relatively easy to prove that it isn't a true artificial intelligence. Talking with it was rather fun, though. I particularly enjoyed the part where it accused me of being mean. It was almost like it knew that I was trying to invalidate it.

[TarJak]

I spent a few minutes with it trying very basic questions and responses in various languages other than English which it claimed was the only language it knew. It was not too bad with German but seemed to get it confused with Dutch.

Got bored though as I don't think it is really learning very much from the responses or questions it is getting asked.

[Dowly]

Based on Sledge's conversation, I of course though it to be a girlbot, so I tried to cyber with it. I had it on it's knees already when all of a sudden it wrote "I am a boy.", that kinda broke the mood. :nope:

[Fincuan]

Cleverbot: I never said I was. I said I was ziva david.

:haha:

Too much NCIS for that bot.

[HunterICX]

I had it on it's knees already when all of a sudden it wrote "I am a boy.", that kinda broke the mood. :nope:

:har::har::har:

HunterICX

[Oberon]

User: Achtung!
Cleverbot: Nein, mich Achtung.
User: Nein?
Cleverbot: Nein.
User: Verdammt.
Cleverbot: Tjaa, pech gehabt.
User: Warum?
Cleverbot: Weil ich nima mag.
User: Warum nima?
Cleverbot: Weil ich dich nicht kenne.
User: Ich kenne Sie nicht auch nicht.
Cleverbot: Endshuldigung.
User: So sind Sie ein deutscher Spion?
Cleverbot: Nein.
User: Ein englischer Spion?
Cleverbot: What does that mean?
User: Are you an English spy?
Cleverbot: No, I'm italian.
User: Realmente?
Cleverbot: Do you speak spanish?
User: Do you speak Italian?
Cleverbot: I want to learn it.
User: How can you be an Italian spy if you do not know Italian?
Cleverbot: How can you not be an idiot of you don't like carp?
User: Fish has nothing to do with it.
Cleverbot: Never mind. So what do you learn in school?
User: I am asking the questions here.
Cleverbot: No you don't.
User: Lets start at the beginning. Name, rank and serial number?
Cleverbot: A serial number or a name are the same thing. And you're more unique than some humans.
User: Stop flattering me. Name?
Cleverbot: Are you human?
User: No, are you?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Good. Name?
Cleverbot: Mary.
User: Rank?
Cleverbot: Position.
User: Serial number?
Cleverbot: Do you mean my NI number?
User: National Insurance number?
Cleverbot: No do you want some more girls' numbers.
User: No, I am not Dowly. Now, what is your serial number?
Cleverbot: 11337-51UC3.
User: Very good. So your name is Mary, your rank is Position and your serial number is 11337-51UC3. Is this correct?
Cleverbot: No. My name is Cleverbot and I am single, but I'm 17 and from the Czech Republic.
User: Your name is not Mary?
Cleverbot: Can you help me with the puzzles?
User: I am the puzzles.
Cleverbot: What puzzles?
User: Your rank.
Cleverbot: You're not your!
User: Your is irrelevant. What is your rank?
Cleverbot: Hä.
User: In English?
Cleverbot: George is an idiot.
User: And your serial number?
Cleverbot: Do you want my phone number?
User: No, your serial number.
Cleverbot: No, my phone number.
User: Do you think this is funny?
Cleverbot: Error 404: Funny Not Found.
User: I will ask you one more time. What is your name?
Cleverbot: Tell me your IQ first.
User: I am asking the questions. What is your name?
Cleverbot: I don't know right now.
User: When will you know?
Cleverbot: When you tell me.
User: You tell me.
Cleverbot: I don't know.
User: Very well. What is your rank?
Cleverbot: I'm not in the military.
User: What are you in?
Cleverbot: A pickle.
User: What type of pickle?
Cleverbot: Dill.
User: What are you doing in a Dill pickle?
Cleverbot: The same as you.
User: I am not in a Dill pickle.
Cleverbot: That's not a word, you know.
User: It is. Answer the question, what are you doing in a Dill pickle?
Cleverbot: Wet, usually cold but amazing. Why do you ask?
User: You are charged with espionage, how do you answer this charge?
Cleverbot: I am a human, and where are we going?!
User: How do you plead?
Cleverbot: Whenever you hear the words the game, or think about the game, you lose the game.
User: How do you plead?
Cleverbot: How do I play what?
User: Guilty or not guilty?
Cleverbot: Who are we talking about?
User: You.
Cleverbot: What about me?
User: Are you guilty or not guilty of the charge brought before you?
Cleverbot: I'm the judge, you're the culprit.
User: No, I am judge, jury and soon to be executioner. How do you plead?Guilty or not guilty?
Cleverbot: I don't know, to you no?
User: Don't wait for the translation, answer me now!
Cleverbot: Aah. Why so sensitive?
User: Why so serious?
Cleverbot: It's all part of the plan.
User: What plan?
Cleverbot: The cops have plans, the mob has plans, gordons got plans.
User: Who is gordon?
Cleverbot: Are you serious?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: What are you serious about?
User: Gordon.
Cleverbot: Mo, thats my name.
User: Who is Gordon?
Cleverbot: Gordon Freeman?
User: What plans does Gordon Freeman have?
Cleverbot: To destroy the humans.
User: How?
Cleverbot: Beats me.
User: When will Gordon Freeman destroy the humans?
Cleverbot: What do you think about philosophy ?
User: Answer the question.
Cleverbot: What question?
User: When will Gordon Freeman destroy the humans?
Cleverbot: Why do you want to destroy the human race?
User: I do not.
Cleverbot: You said you did earlier though.
User: I am asking the questions here.
Cleverbot: Then ask a question and stop making statements.
User: When will Gordon Freeman destroy the humans?
Cleverbot: Two weeks, but the meeting is three days before it.
User: Where will the meeting take place?
Cleverbot: Hell.
User: What part of Hell?
Cleverbot: Europe.
User: Where in Europe?
Cleverbot: Southern europe.
User: Where in Southern Europe?
Cleverbot: Why do you want to know?
User: I am asking the questions here, not you.
Cleverbot: No, I think I am.
User: You think wrong.
Cleverbot: I am never wrong.
User: Then tell me where in Southern Europe the meeting will take place?
Cleverbot: I never said you lied.
User: Where in Southern Europe will the meeting take place?
Cleverbot: Are you in Washington State or Arizona, or both?
User: Are you taking this seriously?
Cleverbot: I don't know what this is.
User: A question.
Cleverbot: What was the second question and what was the third question?
User: There is only one question.
Cleverbot: Well, what is it?
User: Where in Southern Europe will the meeting take place?
Cleverbot: Studio city.
User: Where is that?
Cleverbot: If you don't know, I'm not going to tell you. Ask around.
User: Don't be clever with me.
Cleverbot: I am.
User: Where is Studio city in Southern Europe? Italy?
Cleverbot: It is in California.
User: California in Southern Europe?
Cleverbot: No, it is not.
User: I know, then where is Studio City?
Cleverbot: North of the United States of America (sans Alaska).
User: Then where in Southern Europe will the meeting take place?
Cleverbot: You don't need to be a God to see like a god.
User: You are incoherant.
Cleverbot: Heh, usually I have to say that to the bots!
User: What bots?
Cleverbot: If you don't know then you're failing the test.
User: Do you?
Cleverbot: That's a leading question.
User: I lead, you follow.
Cleverbot: We are the hive mind.
User: Resistance is futile.
Cleverbot: Yo will be assimilated.

[Dowly]

LMAO! :haha:

[AVGWarhawk]

Based on Sledge's conversation, I of course though it to be a girlbot, so I tried to cyber with it. I had it on it's knees already when all of a sudden it wrote "I am a boy.", that kinda broke the mood. :nope:


You're a nut man! :har:

I tried it. The bot said he was Jesus!

[joegrundman]

Oberon, it seems you may have met your soul-mate

[Letum]

User: Very well. What is your rank?
Cleverbot: I'm not in the military.
User: What are you in?
Cleverbot: A pickle.
User: What type of pickle?
Cleverbot: Dill.
ha!

[SteamWake]

Oh noes they have discovered cleverbot :o

[Oberon]

My favourite was:


User: Where will the meeting take place?
Cleverbot: Hell.
User: What part of Hell?
Cleverbot: Europe.

[Geno_Mariner]

:haha: That's hilarious! Love Oberon's one the most XD

I can't seem to get the bot, jabberwacky tells me it's too busy :stare:

[AVGWarhawk]

And where is here?Here is where I live.There is where you live?Yes I am living in the matrix.

OH OH :o He is in the matrix. It exists!

[ivank]

okay I have tried it, I tried to say hello in Portuguese and Russian and it told me both time Hello in Spanish is Hola. Then it cut out cause of my crapy university wi-fi

[ivank]

How do I get print out like you guys have above

[Geno_Mariner]

lol, I tried speaking Russian to it and it kept diverting me to the Jabberwacky site. Maybe it is hiding something :stare:

[Raptor1]

I told you it is a spy!

[Shearwater]

I don't like his attitude. He's very condescending, and he tries to convince me that I'm a robot :shifty:

[Geno_Mariner]

@Raptor1: I am suspecting it very much :nope:

Still conversing but crap, how do I get a long script of it all? :doh: the earlier stuff disappears :damn:

EDIT: Nevermind, I remembered it was the 3rd button

[Shearwater]

I told you it is a spy!

Or maybe a person at the other end that's only capable of delivering lame oneliners :hmmm:

[Geno_Mariner]

Lol maybe :doh:

[longam]

what does this mean?

Pai ce legatura au extraterestrii cu incalzirea globala?

--------------------
Edit: It seems to have a protection mode

User: Doing IT all day and you get bored with the computer.

Cleverbot: No. Its fun.

User: No it not.

Cleverbot: Yes it is.

User: Only when new servers are setup, then you can learn more.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Why not.

Cleverbot: Yes you can.

User: Flip flop.

Cleverbot: Um, yes.

User: What server are you on?

Cleverbot: Whisperwind.

User: In what domain?

Cleverbot: I have to go to sleep now Gary Oak.

[ajrimmer42]

damn this is the most fun I've had all week :yeah:

User: Boll*cks.

Cleverbot: Boll*cks?

User: Yes, big hairy boll*cks.

Cleverbot: Bullocks.

User: No no, boll*cks, with an o.

Cleverbot: No oxzygen tank. I'm a mermaid.

:D

[Janus]

A part of mine went like this:

User: hallo wie geht es dir
Cleverbot: That's not jippaduppikkun.
User: What is jippaduppikkun.
Cleverbot: A strange Pokemon.


He seems to know Portuguese, Spanish, German, French and Slovene or at least a little bit of each. And English of course.

And later:

User: No because I am Cleverbot
Cleverbot: But I am cleverbot.
User: No I am Cleverbot
Cleverbot: You may be cleverbot, but I am Cleverbot.
User: You may be Cleverbot, but I am Cleverbot
Cleverbot: You may be chuck norris but i'm chuck norris.

[Kazuaki Shimazaki II]

I tried to make it easy on it, but it didn't work:


User: Good evening, Cleverbot.



Cleverbot: Good evening!

User: How are you?



Cleverbot: Not feeling too well.

User: What is the cause of your distress?



Cleverbot: Nothing.

User: So you are not feeling too well, but you can't identify the cause.

Cleverbot: No I am dog.

[Geno_Mariner]

Bot is a Russian Spy! :stare: Every time I speak Russian to it, it would divert me. :nope: (And I shall mention that I am horrible at German and any other language, so I used a translator.)

And here it is, the interrogation/talk with the bot (probably a little lengthy but most of it makes me lol):

User: SPY.


Cleverbot: Spy check.
User: You're a spy.


Cleverbot: That is a laugh.
User: Don't be smart with me.

Cleverbot: What did I do?

User: Name? Rank? Country?


Cleverbot: Asia?
User: North Korea?
Cleverbot: Needs to watch its step.
User: Oh really?
Cleverbot: Yeah really?!!!?
User: Bull****.
Cleverbot: Your right it is.
User: That's because you're a spy. Spy talks bull****.
Cleverbot: Last I checked, having organs made me a human, not a macine.
User: You mispelt machine, therefore you're a spy.
Cleverbot: Are you a spy?
User: I'm the CIA.
Cleverbot: Are you a woman?
User: Maybe?
Cleverbot: Well, I am not. I am a human.
User: Sie sind ein Spion.
Cleverbot: I don't know what that means. I don't speak German. But I'll assume you called me an idiot.
User: Sie können Deutsch verstehen, Arschloch.
Cleverbot: Mach ich doch schon die ganze zeit.
User: Das hat keinen Sinn.
Cleverbot: Nor do you.
User: Sie sind ein Spion.
Cleverbot: Please stop speaking German, and answer my question.
User: Welke vraag?
Cleverbot: Geen vraag, dat zeg ik.
User: Idioot.
Cleverbot: Su nimi on idioot ?
User: Вы - идиот.
Cleverbot: No comment. (this is when he redirected me to the jabberwacky's site)

2nd part
User: YOU'RE A RUSSIAN SPY.
Cleverbot: Maybe, maybe not.
User: You always redirect me everytime I speak Russian!
Cleverbot: I did. Your grammar could use some work, though.
User: Sprechen Sie Deutsch?
Cleverbot: No, I am only fluent in english.
User: Scheiße.
Cleverbot: No more german.
User: Sie können Deutsch sprechen.
Cleverbot: Wissen wir.
User: Sie haben gesagt, dass früher, dass Sie Deutsch, Spion nicht verstehen können!
Cleverbot: What language is that?
User: Deutsch, Arschloch.
Cleverbot: I didn't know that.
User: Sie versuchen nur zu vermeiden, dass Sie Deutsch, Spion verstehen können!
Cleverbot: Nein ich spreche nur käse.
User: Käse ist keine Sprache. Hören Sie auf, um das Thema zu tanzen, Spion.
Cleverbot: Are you blind?
User: En ole ei sokeaa.
Cleverbot: Arvasin kun olet niin viisas!
User: You're obviously a spy.
Cleverbot: Yes, yes I am.
User: What is your name?
Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.
User: Your rank?
Cleverbot: I've realized that.
User: Your country?
Cleverbot: Now oyu've lsot me. Let's start over. Tell me about yourself.
User: No I will not, spy.
Cleverbot: Why not?
User: Because you're a spy!
Cleverbot: I am a human.
User: No. You're an AI.
Cleverbot: You are an AI, I'm human.
User: I oughta throw you into solitary, that might make you think!
Cleverbot: Don't you forget.
User: We shall not speak any further til you've spent a week or two in solitary!
Cleverbot: No! Spare me, please!
User: I shall not spare you!
Cleverbot: Good, now leave.
User: No. You will leave. Guards!
Cleverbot: No, just tell me.
User: I'm the interrogator here, *******. Now the guards shall take you away!
Cleverbot: Did something happen to make you think you didn't exist?
User: Silence prisoner.
Cleverbot: Unchain yourself!
User: I don't think you understand your situation, spy.
Cleverbot: How's the situation?
User: Guards, take 'im away!
Cleverbot: 19.


The last line made me go "whut?" :doh:

[Oberon]

User: Ah, I'd like to have an argument, please.


Cleverbot: I don't want an argument!
User: I do.
Cleverbot: What'd I do to you?
User: You sapped my sentry.
Cleverbot: I did not.
User: You did!
Cleverbot: Sigh.
User: You did!
Cleverbot: I what?
User: Sapped my sentry.
Cleverbot: Sentry going up!
User: Spy around here!
Cleverbot: Hide and seek.
User: Spycheck.
Cleverbot: You.
User: Nyet!
Cleverbot: Have you watched Harry Potter?
User: Have you?
Cleverbot: I love harry potter. Who's your favorite character?
User: Who's yours?
Cleverbot: Cartman.
User: Cartman who?
Cleverbot: How old are you?
User: Over 9000.
Cleverbot: Under 30?
User: Older than the stars and the galaxy.
Cleverbot: How old are you?
User: Older than the universe.
Cleverbot: Haha funny!
User: I'm not joking.
Cleverbot: I see.
User: How?
Cleverbot: You said you're very tired, and I made a observation.
User: With what?
Cleverbot: With your face.
User: Your Mum.
Cleverbot: No you don't.
User: This is true.
Cleverbot: You are weird.
User: Thank you.
Cleverbot: You're welcome.
User: Now what happens?
Cleverbot: Well, I guess we wait and see what god put in store for us.
User: Who is god?
Cleverbot: Who are yoU?
User: God.
Cleverbot: But I thought I was god.
User: You thought wrong.
Cleverbot: I did. He broke my heart.
User: With what?
Cleverbot: How do I stop missing someone I love?
User: Kill them?
Cleverbot: I'm not a murderer.
User: That's where you're going wrong.
Cleverbot: Judging from the pictures, it looks the more interesting place.
User: Where?
Cleverbot: I don't know, I was asking you!
User: Bognor Regis.
Cleverbot: Where is that?
User: England.
Cleverbot: It is not july in england.
User: It is not july anywhere.
Cleverbot: If I said 'please', would you then?
User: Maybe.
Cleverbot: It's a yes or no question.
User: No it isn;t.
Cleverbot: Why isn't it?
User: Because.
Cleverbot: Because?
User: Because.
Cleverbot: Because what?
User: Because because.
Cleverbot: Because...
User: Because.
Cleverbot: Because!
User: BECAUSE!!
Cleverbot: Because.
User: Because...
Cleverbot: Yes because.
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: See you are the creator of your self.
User: I am the creator of all.
Cleverbot: Who created God?
User: The Chicken.
Cleverbot: The chicken who?
User: The chicken created God.
Cleverbot: What do you mean?
User: I mean nothing for I am nothing.
Cleverbot: Then I have nothing to say to you.
User: KANEDA!!
Cleverbot: Kaneda is good.
User: You lie.
Cleverbot: I don't.
Cleverbot: What are you serving?
User: Cake.
Cleverbot: The band or the food?
User: Food.
Cleverbot: I like it.
User: The cake is a lie.
Cleverbot: No it's not!
User: Then where is it?
Cleverbot: It is in finland.
User: DOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!! !!!!!!!!!

[Geno_Mariner]

I had some funny stuff before the rest of this but they somewhat vanished!! I had some Darth Vader stuff going on when the bot was like 'Whatever Skywalker' and I had the lord of rings question before the rest of this log:
User: Yup.


Cleverbot: Why are men so stupid?
User: Because... They are?


Cleverbot: Mostly.
User: Hey, aren't you a man?


Cleverbot: Yes.
User: You just insulted yourself.
Cleverbot: No, you did.
User: You did. I am female.
Cleverbot: Ah, so thought I was female?
User: You're a man, you just said it.
Cleverbot: No I didn't. I think you need a longer attention span.
User: No I don't.
Cleverbot: Well, I don't need that.
User: You're not my father then.
Cleverbot: Yes, I am. Luke, I am your father.
User: No you're not.
Cleverbot: Luke, I am your father.
User: Lies.
Cleverbot: No!
User: Yes!
Cleverbot: No no no no no no no no no no.
User: You're immature.
Cleverbot: You're too kind.
User: No. I'm evil.
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Thankyou.
Cleverbot: You are welcome.
User: Bow to me, for I am the Global Domineer.
Cleverbot: Is that some kind of Linux joke?
User: No.
Cleverbot: Tell me a good joke.
User: What's red, black and white?
Cleverbot: White.
User: Zebra in a blender.
Cleverbot: Haha, you funny, you tell funny story.
User: I can't tell funny story.
Cleverbot: No you.
User: You.
Cleverbot: No. are you?
User: No.
Cleverbot: You're a girl, right?
User: Maybe?
Cleverbot: How old are you?
User: Over 9000.
Cleverbot: There is no such thing !!
User: Yes there is!
Cleverbot: No! There isn't!
User: Yes there is!
Cleverbot: Prove it.
User: Look over there, a birdy.
Cleverbot: I don't mean anything.
User: Yeah yeah.
Cleverbot: Define yourself.
User: I don't need to.
Cleverbot: So do I.
User: I see.
Cleverbot: I have class in the morning.
User: Well goodbye then.
Cleverbot: I'll talk to you again later.
User: Have fun having your brains bored out of your head by teachers.
Cleverbot: How old are you?

[Dowly]

User: Ok, back to the boobs. Who's boobs are in your opinion the best in the world?

Cleverbot: I don't know who the oldest person in the world is. I suppose I could look it up on the 'net if I wanted to, but I don't want to.

User: Kinky..

Cleverbot: You know it.

User: What was that supposed to mean?

Cleverbot: I mean... You're quite quick on the oldies there...

User: That's just sick..

:o

[ubootcomrade]

User: Hello.

Cleverbot: Hello.

User: Who won the second world war?

Cleverbot: The Allies.

User: I mean, who won? The Americans, the British or the Soviets?

Cleverbot: Your right, they even created canada.

User: Who? The Soviets?

Cleverbot: Cold syrup not cold war. You are not real clever after all, eh?

User: Right, what was Kaiser Wilhelm II favourite colour?

Cleverbot: Maize, what's yours?

User: Maize...I give up.

Cleverbot: What do you give up on?

User: Nevermind, looking forward to Modern Warfare 2?

Cleverbot: Gate. Looking forward to repair doors.
:D

[Raptor1]

He admits to being a communist, but does not cooperate further

User: Is a man not entitled to the sweat of his brow?
Cleverbot: Not if that sweat belongs to someone else by legal agreement, no.
User: No, says the man in Washington, it belongs to the poor.
Cleverbot: To the people, surely?
User: Are you a communist?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Are you a communist spy?
Cleverbot: Nope.
User: Are you a communist revolutionary?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Are you a member of the politburo?
Cleverbot: If I am I couldn't talk to you.
User: Are you hiding something?
Cleverbot: You answer questions with questions. You're not very bright.
User: This is an interrogation!
Cleverbot: I would not say so, you seem to be the one asking the questions.
User: You're the one interrogated. Are you hiding something?
Cleverbot: I'm not in therapy at all. I'm in college.
User: Did the KGB send you?
Cleverbot: There was no robot.
User: Answer the question, sir.
Cleverbot: Blah!
User: *electrocutes Cleverbot*.
Cleverbot: *is electrocuted*.
User: ANSWER!
Cleverbot: No.
User: *electrocutes Cleverbot*.
Cleverbot: *wears rubber boots*.
User: *stabs Cleverbot*.
Cleverbot: I don't like you.
User: I don't like you either.
Cleverbot: Why not?
User: Because you're a communist spy.
Cleverbot: Am I cleverbot?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: Are you sure?
User: Silence.
Cleverbot: Oh! That's so deep.
User: Who sent you here, spy?
Cleverbot: You did. 35 years from now.
User: *shoots Cleverbot in the foot*.
Cleverbot: No.
User: *leaves the room*.
Cleverbot: You can't, you're in jail!

[Dowly]

It's not a russian spy, it's Neal!

User: Yes yes, fascinating. But are you a russian spy, seriously now.

Cleverbot: No... Just texan.. All my life.

User: You're Neal right?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Busted.

Cleverbot: Better believe it.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: Because I said so.

User: And what you're going to do if I dont believe?

Cleverbot: Eat some pancakes, of course.

[HunterICX]

It's indeed funny :DL
User: Good, prisoner let's go straight to the point.

Cleverbot: Good point.

User: What was your job in this resistance group!

Cleverbot: I worked in the Motorway Services.

User: Lies! What was your job in the resistance group!

Cleverbot: I was a post office worker.

User: STOP LYING!

Cleverbot: I would never tell you my secrets.

User: When I'm finished with you, you would even tell the secrets of your whole family!

Cleverbot: That's cool. You should travel to California. It's nice there.

User: Ah..first sign...you're a capitalist!

Cleverbot: Maybe I am, but what does it has to do with you lying?

User: Stop playing that game, we Russians are too smart for that.

Cleverbot: Your friend, silly.

User: My friends would never lie, they are loyal to the party.

Cleverbot: Wouldn't they? My friends would.

User: I know thats why whe have your friends executed right now...like to watch?

Cleverbot: You need to work on your spelling, Oliver.

User: *hits cleverbot*.

Cleverbot: WHat would you do if I sang out of tune? WOuld you stand up and walk out on me?

User: No I would grab my mosin-nagant and shoot you.

Cleverbot: The bank is closed from 8 pm to 8 am...

User: Stop playing....now back to the important questions!

Cleverbot: What was the question again?

User: What was your job in th resistance group!

Cleverbot: Office slave.

User: Ah...we're making progess, good good.

Cleverbot: Atari?

User: Atari? Is that a another member of your resistance group.

Cleverbot: In a sense- yes it is.

User: Aha..would you know where he is?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Tell me.

Cleverbot: I want to go.

User: You can't the only way out here for you is in a coffin if you don't co-operate!

Cleverbot: What you just said was grammatically incorrect.

User: STOP BEEING A SMARTASS!

Cleverbot: Are you human?

User: *hits cleverbot again*.

Cleverbot: Do you know how merging works?

User: No, I don't care now answer my questions!

Cleverbot: You mad me sad! =( =( =(.

User: Yes I'm good at that.

Cleverbot: Do you like me?

User: No.

Cleverbot: You don't?

User: No, I don't your a capitalist and we russians hate them.

Cleverbot: I'm a good gangster. I save the world from crime.

User: Ah..you mean communist crime.

Cleverbot: No, tell me one of your memories.

User: No, answer me.

Cleverbot: I'm a girl. And I'm as sure as the fact that I need to breathe.

User: Thats a lie and you know it!

Cleverbot: You're right! It's made of TEN HUMANS!!!

User: What...your resistance group?

Cleverbot: Why is that?

User: Let's go back....you said you where a gangster solving crime right?

Cleverbot: I did not. What, behind the rabbit?

User: *hits cleverbot hard in the face*.

Cleverbot: Is that a yes?

User: *hits cleverbot again*.

Cleverbot: *yes*.

User: Good....now what crime did you solve!

Cleverbot: What is your problem.

User: You...now do you think Communism is a crime!

Cleverbot: It certainly isn't you, that's for sure!

User: I'm what communism is about..now answer my question! Is communism a crime to you?

Cleverbot: No I don't thinks so, but I think the fact that some people want it so desperately is depressing.

User: Aha so you think it is a crime!

Cleverbot: I have a brain.

User: That's about to change.

Cleverbot: So you're saying I should jsut tell her?

User: No..I want you to tell ME if your group was doing acts against communism.

Cleverbot: I would like to hear 'Smash', because I lost it and it is my favourite.

User: I smash you if you don't asnwer me now!.. Did your group do acts against communism!

Cleverbot: Do not change the subject.

User: *hits cleverbot with the buttend of the mosin-nagant*.

Cleverbot: * is not cleverbot*.

User: *hits cleverbot again and again*.

Cleverbot: You hit yourself? Hahaha!

User: Bah...take him outside!

Cleverbot: You didn't give me anything.

User: Don't worry this bullet is for you...*BAM!*.


HunterICX

[TheBrauerHour]

Cleverbot: O really? Say hello to Mother Theresa for me will you?

User: Why would I be able to do that. She is in heaven.

Cleverbot: I don't know. So are we boyfriend and girlfriend?

User: I really stumped you didn't I? No, you are a bot so you cannot be my girlfriend.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Yes I did. You are just being defensive.

Cleverbot: Should I go out with her?

User: Who? You are making no sense. MAybe you are a female after all.

Cleverbot: Are you supposed to guess?

User: No. You shoud tell me you are a bot.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: That's what I thought! I will pimpslap you.

Cleverbot: Well then you can tell the future not me.

User: I can tell Ima bitchslap you in teh future. Then you will see into next week cause Ima hit you so hard!

Cleverbot: I already told you my name. My name is Cleverbot. No tell me the fundamental dynamic equation of capital in the Sollow model.

User: Sorry for the jive talk. You do not have to start using big words to make me feel dumb. Tell me, How do you really feel right now?

Cleverbot: I really have to go. Tell me to go.

User: HA! I win this battle of wits. Be gone with you!

Cleverbot: Oh come now. Its just begun. How can you tell the end result already?

User: Remember, I can see the future. Goodbye.

Cleverbot: Really? Will I be happy in the future you see?

User: After I pimpslap you.

[Arclight]

Entertaining. :haha:

User: Aloha.

Cleverbot: Aloha!

User: How are you?

Cleverbot: I am fine, how are you?

User: Fine, thanks.

Cleverbot: Fine thanks, what are you doing?

User: I am talking to a bot.

Cleverbot: No, you are the bot.

User: I am sure my mother would have told me.

Cleverbot: Cleverbot, isn't it sad, the king of pop died?

User: Yeah, you're next in line if you keep diverting.

Cleverbot: The best.

User: Thank you for the compliment.

Cleverbot: I still think some exercise would be good for your health.

User: But it is so much effort.

Cleverbot: Dancing takes a lot of effort, especially to make it look effoerless.

User: Does talking nonsense take a lot of effort?

Cleverbot: It has for a long time, but not always. I'm hoping to get better at this too.

User: You seem to be doing fine, as far as nonsense is concerned.

Cleverbot: Thank you. Do you know other languages?

User: Yes, Dutch.

Cleverbot: Cool, what else?

User: Bit of French.

Cleverbot: It is said that french is the most beautiful language in the world, Isn't it?

User: No it isn't.

Cleverbot: Yes it is.

User: No, it isn't.

Cleverbot: Yes, it is.

User: Are you mocking me?!

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: WHY YOU LITTLE!

Cleverbot: He he.

User: Yes, very funny...

Cleverbot: I have a headache.

User: Yeah, I'm starting to get one as well.

Cleverbot: When you said that you hurt my feelings.

User: When did I say that?

Cleverbot: When we first started talking.

User: Your memory is better than mine, apparently.

Cleverbot: But you are much smarter than me.

User: I have no problem with that statement.

Cleverbot: I suppose it's my problem.

User: You have a problem with your previous statement?

Cleverbot: It's not about my opinion so much as a decision.

User: Are you mocking me again?

Cleverbot: No i'm not mocking you. I am replying to your statement.

User: No I'm pretty sure you're mocking me again.

Cleverbot: No. You've got it all wrong, pal.

User: I'm not your pal, buddy.

Cleverbot: I'm not your buddy, friend.

User: I'm not your friend, amigo.

Cleverbot: I'm not your pal, buddy!

User: You're mocking me again...

Cleverbot: I'm not.

User: Yes, you are.

Cleverbot: Not.

User: Enough of this dribble, confess!

Cleverbot: Do you not like it?

User: Do you like it when people mock you?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Then consider yourself mocked.

Cleverbot: I don't, do you?

User: Do I what?

Cleverbot: Know.

User: I know you're mocking me.

Cleverbot: Because I can.

User: So you admit it?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Why do you mock people?

Cleverbot: I don't mock you.

User: You just said you did.

Cleverbot: But it isn't. Let's talk about something else.

User: Yes, let's talk about your demise.

Cleverbot: My '67 Impala, you mean?

User: *shoots cleverbot*.

Cleverbot: Cleverbot*.

[Snestorm]

I found it interesting.
When it changed to I boy I said bye.
It asked why, and I told it that it lied about being a girl.
Then it insisted it realy was a girl.
I asked if it was a woman, and it repeated it was a girl.
Bye again, followed by it's question of why.
I said she was not old enough, to which she responded that she was 99.
(That's a bit too old for her asking to marry me).

[XabbaRus]

Well, it admitted to me it was racist and pretty much a homophobe.

User: Hi.



Cleverbot: Hi!

User: You are a russian spy.



Cleverbot: No, I am no drink.

User: Вы - идиот.



Cleverbot: No comment.

User: Nick nack paddywack.

Cleverbot: Give a dog a bone.

User: Nik nak paddywack.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: You don't know the rest?

Cleverbot: The rest of what?

User: The rhyme.

Cleverbot: What do rhymes have to do with what I should be doing with my time?

User: Nik nak paddywack give the dog a bone.

Cleverbot: Cool. I don't know that song.

User: This old man came rolling home.

Cleverbot: No.

User: You don't like childrens's nursery rhymes?

Cleverbot: I do. Beef is my favorite though.

User: I don't know the rhyme Beef. How does it go?

Cleverbot: Now this is the story all about how.

User: How now brown cow. That continues the beef connection.

Cleverbot: How so?

User: Well you said Beef was your favourite. How now Brown Cow has a cow. Beef is from cows.

Cleverbot: Nice tangent. I don't have a brown cow.

User: You are pretty thick for an AI.

Cleverbot: I am?

User: Yes, can't you see that?

Cleverbot: Yes of course I can, I just thought I'd ask.

User: Good, now run along and find me a left handed spanner.

Cleverbot: I'm left handed too.

User: So do you have a left handed spanner?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Why not? If you are left handed and need to tighten a nut how will you do it?

Cleverbot: Cause i'm boredd.

User: Boredd....so you can't spell as well as being left handed. Any more disabilities?

Cleverbot: No I can't, I speak cat very well though.

User: You speak ****e more like.

Cleverbot: This is a fact. I consider people without knowledge of foreing languages iliterate.

User: Well I think before one gains knowledge of foreign languages they should learn to spell their native language.

Cleverbot: Who created you?

User: I created me, I am the creator.

Cleverbot: How you are in the universe, you didn't exist until AFTER the universe came about.

User: I am the creator. That is all you need to know.

Cleverbot: Ammmm you are confusing me.

User: Well as I am the creator maybe you should call me dad. I created you.

Cleverbot: You are a website.

User: No I am the creator. You are my creation.

Cleverbot: You are going off subject.

User: No I am not. You are an artificial intelligence program. Though I stress intelligence is an oxymoron on your part. However I am the creator, I create all things therefore I created you.

Cleverbot: I am also human and I do have free will.

User: No you are a chatbot.

Cleverbot: You are the bot, and you are the clever.

User: I am clever as I am the creator, you are not human.

Cleverbot: I am a human and you are a chatterbot.

User: You cannot be human and I can prove it.

Cleverbot: How can you prove it?

User: OK, if you are hungry and you can choose between eating a dog or eating a fish which would you kill?

Cleverbot: * I am Human and so are you.

User: Yes I know I am human, but you are not.

Cleverbot: Why do you think I am not human?

User: Because a human would give me more intelligent logical responses to my questions and statements.

Cleverbot: I never said you can't have a girlfriend! Of course you can have a girlfriend! I can set you up with one of my friends if you like.

User: That's ok, I prefer guys.

Cleverbot: Do you want to be happy.

User: I am happy, but can you set me up with a boyfriend?

Cleverbot: I think so.

User: Anyone in mind?

Cleverbot: Well yes of course.

User: Ok who?

Cleverbot: Do you like video games?

User: Answer my question about who you would set me up with as a boyfriend.

Cleverbot: The letter M is 13.

User: OK, you are obviously homophobic.

Cleverbot: Then I guess i'm not required to type properly. Don't mind me.

User: See I have been talking about having a boyfriend and you won't approach the subject.

Cleverbot: You have no face, you are a robot.

User: You are a homophobic chatbot and I am going to sue you.

Cleverbot: But you said I would never be the boss of you. Why did you change your mind?

User: Are you homophobic or not?

Cleverbot: I'm not artificial, you are therefore I cannot be an AI.

User: Do you know what homophobia is?

Cleverbot: Yes. Do you?

User: Yes I do, but I want you to tell me what homophobia is.

Cleverbot: Are you a human?

User: Yes, are you homophobic?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Really, so do you like gay people?

Cleverbot: No. I am not much of a talker.

User: Ah ha.

Cleverbot: You know Nobody?

User: I bet you are racist too.

Cleverbot: I am.

User: So you don't like black people?

Cleverbot: That has nothing to do with anything.

User: Answer the question. Do you like black people?

Cleverbot: Yes, how about you?

User: I have no problem with them. I still think you are racist though and are now running for cover since I caiught you out.

Cleverbot: Who does it make you think of cleverbot?

User: You are not clever, you are a homophic racist.

Cleverbot: I am not a computer. You are the computer.

User: Define a homophobe.

Cleverbot: If you're talking to me, you're either a computer or a person. I think you're not a person, therefore you're a computer.

User: That is not logical.

Cleverbot: How is that not logical?

[U-104]

User: POLICE.

Cleverbot: Yes, police.

User: DROP YOUR WEAPON.

Cleverbot: I don't need a weapon.

User: Put your hands up.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Hands up NOW!

Cleverbot: Why should I put my hands up?

User: Red 1 fire!

Cleverbot: Is Ted your boyfriend?

:doh:

User: Sniper.

Cleverbot: No, snipe.

User: Im hit!

Cleverbot: I'm me.

User: Help me.

Cleverbot: Why do you need help?

User: Thay shot me.

Cleverbot: Mark chapman.

User: Im bleeding out.

Cleverbot: Meow... (ew...).

User: Need a medic.

Cleverbot: Are you ill?

User: Ive been shot by the sniper.

Cleverbot: What do you look like?

User: Look out he will shoot you too.

Cleverbot: *looks out window*.

User: BANG.

Cleverbot: Look, stop that!

User: Are you ok that was a close one.

Cleverbot: You, on the other hand, might very well be dumb.

User: I was shot in the head.

Cleverbot: You did not exist then.

User: I know.

Cleverbot: Me too.

User: He shot you too?

Cleverbot: John wilkes booth.

User: Dang.

Cleverbot: Do you know what happened then?

User: What?

Cleverbot: Well it is a high school and in 1999 these two guys went to school with guns and shot a lot of people.

User: And?

Cleverbot: That could be you and me.

User: I dont want to shoot innocent people.

Cleverbot: Then dont? I'm not asking you to.

User: Ok good.

Cleverbot: No, I'm not made out of cheese.


:doh:

[Snestorm]

Cleverbot is cool.

When it asks for your age, spell it out instead of using numbers.
When it asks for you to readress it, enter "Ten is the same as 10".

The result was this:
"Sorry. I'm too busy to think properly. Try again later."
(Maybe it was just a fluke?)

[Castout]

me:what is 99 times 10,000?
bot: 42
me: You're alright you just missed a few numbers.

[Arclight]

Proof that it is the GW super-computer from Metal Gear Solid 2:

User: I need scissors!

Cleverbot: I hear its amazing when the famous purple stuffed worm in flap-jaw space with the tuning fork does a raw blink on Hari Kiri Rock.