The Wedding Ring

[AVGWarhawk]

The Wedding Ring
A man went to the hospital in Cooktown , Queensland to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis.
According to the nurse attending the operation, the patient's girlfriend
found the ring in his pants pocket.
She didn't know he was married and she was so mad she used petroleum
jelly to slip the ring on his penis while he was asleep.

I don't know what's worse:

1) Having your girlfriend find out you're married.
2) Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis.
OR...
3) Finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring.

Tough call. You decide.

[longam]

http://firingsquid.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/gollum-and-the-precious.jpg

My Precious!

Maybe he had really big fingers! :haha:

[Buddahaid]

Cripes just how soundly does this guy sleep!

Buddahaid

[GoldenRivet]

thats why guys stick to gold bands without any identifying engravings (not for the penis reason) but because if anything happens to it...

be it

lost in a lake during a fishing trip
left at the house of a drunken one nighter
irretrievably lost in some body cavity of a stripper

you can always go down to wal mart and get a simple gold band.

just pay cash, burn the receipt.

If the shine on your new ring comes up... claim you were looking for some Christmas ideas at the jeweler and took them up on their offer of a free ring cleaning and buffing and its as good as new.

in the mean time she will be wondring what christmas ideas you managed to come up with... and in a few weeks time it will be scuffed up and dirty just like the one you lost in that strippers arse in Sacramento that one time that you try not to tell people about.

[Aramike]

thats why guys stick to gold bands without any identifying engravings (not for the penis reason) but because if anything happens to it...

be it

lost in a lake during a fishing trip
left at the house of a drunken one nighter
irretrievably lost in some body cavity of a stripper

you can always go down to wal mart and get a simple gold band.

just pay cash, burn the receipt.

If the shine on your new ring comes up... claim you were looking for some Christmas ideas at the jeweler and took them up on their offer of a free ring cleaning and buffing and its as good as new.

in the mean time she will be wondring what christmas ideas you managed to come up with... and in a few weeks time it will be scuffed up and dirty just like the one you lost in that strippers arse in Sacramento that one time that you try not to tell people about.GR, you sound like a man of experience! :cool:

[GoldenRivet]

well a man has to know these things :haha:

[Rilder]

Oh gods, I hope he didn't wake up with morning wood. :rotfl::rotfl:

[TarJak]

I;m not sure which story is worse. The Queenslander or GR losing his wedding ring in a strippers arse??? :doh:

[GoldenRivet]

I;m not sure which story is worse. The Queenslander or GR losing his wedding ring in a strippers arse??? :doh:

it just might be a hypothetical situation ;)

[Aramike]

it just might be a hypothetical situation ;)Uh, oh ... anyone got a good lead on a marriage councellor for GR? :arrgh!:

[GoldenRivet]

Uh, oh ... anyone got a good lead on a marriage councellor for GR? :arrgh!:

lol:woot:

[Jimbuna]

I don't have a wedding ring....and I'm not saying why :DL