Oh, no...

[meduza]

August 1940. Completed my duty in AM68 sector, going home, south through St George's Channel, then English Channel. It was good patrol, 50.000 tons, and still have 2 torpedoes.

Diving for regular sound check. A propeller noise! Sounds big.

Ship spotted! Looks like a large merchant. My officer confirms. Periscope depth!

Weather's rough, no chance to finish her with the gun if one eel doesn't do its job. Preparing both torpedoes, impact detonators, depth 5m, fast.

Her course is 45, speed 9kt. I'm setting the TDC dials, distance will be 500m. I'm off doing something else while my sonarman shouts the bearings.

Right full rudder, course 315, ahead full! Up periscope! Fire one at the middle, two at the stern! Full left rudder! Down periscope... no, wait a minute... what's that? She's flying an American flag! Oh no! What can I do? Surface and try to warn them? Too late, less than 30 seconds...

First impact. A large explosion tore the ship. Looks like she was carrying explosives. Second impact. Unnecessary, she was already done with the first one.

What shall I tell Doenitz?
:damn:

[Task Force]

Tell nothing, it was a wandering mine.:yep:

[Wreford-Brown]

Deny Everything!!!

[Silverleaf]

Tell nothing, .... Deny Everything!!!

These guys get my vote for German Political Officer !!!

[meduza]

Tell nothing, it was a wandering mine.:yep:
Yes, a wondering mine! Two of them, actually. :D

Deny Everything!!!
Deny what? I wasn't even there. ;)

[A Very Super Market]

It'll be hard to get out of, Doenitz doesn't like us hanging around the channel anyways... The best course of action is to blame someone else :P


Have you guys seen the Mr. Hilter sketch from Monty Python? This thread reminds me of it

[Kongo Otto]

I think you need a big furry coat, for your next Patrol.
At the Eastern Front. :rotfl:

[Kapt Z]

Ouch. :o

I came upon a Large Freighter myself last nite. West of Portugal, Sept '41. It was a dark night and even though I closed to 1000m, on the surface, I still could not make out whether it was British or American. Whoever they were they lucked out. I chose not to fire and let them go.

I had the tubes flooded, outer doors open and my finger on the button....:damn:

[kenijaru]

Have you guys seen the Mr. Hilter sketch from Monty Python? This thread reminds me of it

you wouldn't have much fun in stalingrad
....
he's right you know?

[Silverleaf]

Ohh, Clockwork Orange !!

Very niccccccccce!

[A Very Super Market]

Not Clockwork Orange, its Monty Python.


And this here is Ron. Ron Vibbentrop
Not Von Ribbentrop, eh?
Nein! Nein! Oh. Ha ha. Different other chap. I in Somerset am being born. Von Ribbentrop is born Gotterdammerstrasse 46, Dusseldorf Vest 8!
:huh:
So they say!

[kenijaru]

Not Clockwork Orange, its Monty Python.


i think he means my signature ;)

also, i like the funniest joke in the world.

the part in Peenemünde where they are developing the V-joke, that always cracks me up...
scientist: *reads joke in German*
army officer: :nope:
another gestapo officer: we'll let you know *shots scientist*

[mr chris]

Start to falsify your Log Book at once and keep radio silence.
Then when you reach base do what WB said deny everything.:yep::yep:
Remember BDU is still not happy about the loss of your first boat this might send him over the edge.:dead::dead:

[meduza]

Yes, the things went a bit downhill lately. :oops: It's gonna take some heavy tonnage to regain BdU's confidence. :D

[Silverleaf]

Scene in Doenitz's office:

Doenitz slowly closes the folder, then locks eyes as you sit in the much shorter chair across the desk from him. "So I am to believe that you had nothing to do with the unfortunate sinking of an American ship?"

"That is correct Sir"

"The problem such a denial raises doesn't need mentioning does it?"

"No Sir"

Doenitz doesn't blink, only continues to stare. Sweat runs down your neck, as he repeats slowly, "Nothing?"

"Bernard did it!"

"Scheisse!"

[meduza]

Scene in Doenitz's office:

Doenitz slowly closes the folder, then locks eyes as you sit in the much shorter chair across the desk from him. "So I am to believe that you had nothing to do with the unfortunate sinking of an American ship?"

"That is correct Sir"

"The problem such a denial raises doesn't need mentioning does it?"

"No Sir"

Doenitz doesn't blink, only continues to stare. Sweat runs down your neck, as he repeats slowly, "Nothing?"

"Bernard did it!"

"Scheisse!" :lol:

[AndyW]

What's a Yank ship doing in the English Channel in Aug. 1940 anyway? Surely full with lend-lease weaponry for the Brits. Serves them right if they got sunk.

To avoid Doenitz' firing squad I suggest to surrender to the next destroyer. Not sure if the AI destroyers give mercy, though.;)

Cheers,
AndyW

[Jimbuna]

Just one question :hmm:

How/why were you planning to fire three eels when you only had two remaining :lol:

[A Very Super Market]

Aha! It was a ruse all along! :doh:

[meduza]

Just one question :hmm:

How/why were you planning to fire three eels when you only had two remaining :lol: :hmm:... A, you mean this:
Fire one at the middle, two at the stern!

It's "fire tube one at the middle, tube two at the stern! :D

[Jimbuna]

Just one question :hmm:

How/why were you planning to fire three eels when you only had two remaining :lol: :hmm:... A, you mean this:
Fire one at the middle, two at the stern!

It's "fire tube one at the middle, tube two at the stern! :D

Thank you for clearing up an old Kaleuns mixed up perception http://www.psionguild.org/forums/images/smilies/wolfsmilies/wacko.gif

[Biggles]

Deny Everything!!!

For some reason I thought of Blackadder when I saw that:doh: :lol:


Anyway, what can you do? Just say that it'll save Germany some effort in the future:know:

[meduza]

My bad luck continues. :doh:
I wasted a perfect opportunity to sink HMS Illustrious. I damaged her, found her again, alone, going 12 knots. I started to overtake beyond visual range, but didn't do a sound check for an hour. She must have changed course, because when I finaly dived there were no sound of her.
:damn:

I'll change my name to Bernard.

[BasilY]

I think you need a big furry coat, for your next Patrol.
At the Eastern Front. :rotfl:

What eastern front? Uncle Joe are our pact brothers! Our treaty of peace and friendship will last a thousand year!:up:

Long live Soviet-German co-operation! (for the rest of 1940 any way.)

[Kongo Otto]

I think you need a big furry coat, for your next Patrol.
At the Eastern Front. :rotfl:
What eastern front? Uncle Joe are our pact brothers! Our treaty of peace and friendship will last a thousand year!:up:

Long live Soviet-German co-operation! (for the rest of 1940 any way.)

Me stupid, i was reading August 1941. :oops::damn::oops:

[A Very Super Market]

Where did you learn that we would attack the Soviets!? We are not going to do that! No! We are going to invade Britain.... :cool:

[Sailor Steve]

What I don't understand is why there is anything to deny at all. Off the American coast, sure, you might have some 'splainin' to do. But in the Channel? In 1940? Surely the Americans have already denied having any ships there. I don't see the problem.:shifty:

[meduza]

What I don't understand is why there is anything to deny at all. Off the American coast, sure, you might have some 'splainin' to do. But in the Channel? In 1940? Surely the Americans have already denied having any ships there. I don't see the problem.:shifty:
I guess you have a point. Any ship in those waters should be a fair game.