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Fish
12-18-08, 05:33 PM
Is Hell Exothermic or Endothermic?

As you study for exams, remember its not the quantity it's the quantity. And remember there is no substitute for pure unadulterated bull
Dr. Schambaugh, of the University of Oklahoma School of Chemical Engineering, Final Exam question for May of 1997. Dr. Schambaugh is known for asking questions such as, "why do airplanes fly?" on his final exams. His one and only final exam question in May 1997 for his Momentum, Heat and Mass Transfer II class was: "Is hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with proof."
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:
"First, We postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave.
Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, then you will go to hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and souls go to hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant. Two options exist:

If hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose.
If hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over.So which is it? If we accept the quote given to me by Theresa Manyan during Freshman year, "that it will be a cold night in hell before I sleep with you" and take into account the fact that I still have NOT succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then Option 2 cannot be true...Thus, hell is exothermic."
The student, Tim Graham, got the only A.

http://www.pinetree.net/humor/thermodynamics.html

UnderseaLcpl
12-18-08, 05:44 PM
:rotfl:
Always a funny story, if a bit old.

Hylander_1314
12-18-08, 05:46 PM
It doesn't rally matter. It's just really really warm there. You may want to pack the shades, some SPF 45 sunblock, and the Bermuda shorts.

A Very Super Market
12-18-08, 06:33 PM
What if the Bermuda shorts got you into Hell in the first place?

Nicolas
12-18-08, 06:54 PM
Ive barely read the post, but if love, hate, or soul related feelings, are quimics in your head, i prefer be dead right now. Come on!! you know you have a soul!! you know!! :p

Task Force
12-18-08, 06:57 PM
I sure hope I never get a question on a biology quiz. My brain would probably play Windows.:huh: (TFs brain crashes to a blue screen."Would someone hit the restart button".)
http://worshipcity.files.wordpress.com/2008/04/blue-screen-2.jpg

Task Force
12-18-08, 06:59 PM
What if the Bermuda shorts got you into Hell in the first place?
That means you were cheating on your wife.:lol:

Skybird
12-18-08, 07:09 PM
:up: Spock must love this!

kiwi_2005
12-18-08, 09:11 PM
Yeah but hes only going by one version of Hell. Hell - brimstone and fire one where the wicked live out there enternal lifes in agony etc.,

He has no idea...

subchaser12
12-18-08, 10:15 PM
I think any college or institution of higher education that teaches hell is real should have its accredidation pulled.

baggygreen
12-18-08, 10:19 PM
People, people....

its a joke!

joke

  Spelled Pronunciation (http://www.subsim.com/radioroom/) http://cache.lexico.com/g/d/dictionary_questionbutton_default.gif (http://dictionary.reference.com/help/luna/IPA_pron_key.html) [http://cache.lexico.com/dictionary/graphics/luna/thinsp.pngjohk] Show IPA Pronunciation (http://www.subsim.com/radioroom/) http://cache.lexico.com/g/d/dictionary_questionbutton_default.gif (http://dictionary.reference.com/help/luna/IPA_pron_key.html)
noun, verb, joked, jok⋅ing. –noun 1.something said or done to provoke laughter or cause amusement, as a witticism, a short and amusing anecdote, or a prankish act: He tells very funny jokes. She played a joke on him. 2.something that is amusing or ridiculous, esp. because of being ludicrously inadequate or a sham; a thing, situation, or person laughed at rather than taken seriously; farce: Their pretense of generosity is a joke. An officer with no ability to command is a joke. 3.a matter that need not be taken very seriously; trifling matter: The loss was no joke. 4.something that does not present the expected challenge; something very easy: The test was a joke for the whole class. 5.practical joke. (http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=practical%20joke&db=luna) –verb (used without object) 6.to speak or act in a playful or merry way: He was always joking with us. 7.to say something in fun or teasing rather than in earnest; be facetious: He didn't really mean it, he was only joking. –verb (used with object) 8.to subject to jokes; make fun of; tease.9.to obtain by joking: The comedian joked coins from the audience.
Origin:
1660–70; < L jocus jesthttp://cache.lexico.com/dictionary/graphics/luna/thinsp.png

subchaser12
12-18-08, 10:40 PM
People, people....

its a joke!

joke

  Spelled Pronunciation (http://www.subsim.com/radioroom/) http://cache.lexico.com/g/d/dictionary_questionbutton_default.gif (http://dictionary.reference.com/help/luna/IPA_pron_key.html) [http://cache.lexico.com/dictionary/graphics/luna/thinsp.pngjohk] Show IPA Pronunciation (http://www.subsim.com/radioroom/) http://cache.lexico.com/g/d/dictionary_questionbutton_default.gif (http://dictionary.reference.com/help/luna/IPA_pron_key.html)
noun, verb, joked, jok⋅ing. –noun 1.something said or done to provoke laughter or cause amusement, as a witticism, a short and amusing anecdote, or a prankish act: He tells very funny jokes. She played a joke on him. 2.something that is amusing or ridiculous, esp. because of being ludicrously inadequate or a sham; a thing, situation, or person laughed at rather than taken seriously; farce: Their pretense of generosity is a joke. An officer with no ability to command is a joke. 3.a matter that need not be taken very seriously; trifling matter: The loss was no joke. 4.something that does not present the expected challenge; something very easy: The test was a joke for the whole class. 5.practical joke. (http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=practical%20joke&db=luna)–verb (used without object) 6.to speak or act in a playful or merry way: He was always joking with us. 7.to say something in fun or teasing rather than in earnest; be facetious: He didn't really mean it, he was only joking. –verb (used with object) 8.to subject to jokes; make fun of; tease.9.to obtain by joking: The comedian joked coins from the audience.
Origin:
1660–70; < L jocus jesthttp://cache.lexico.com/dictionary/graphics/luna/thinsp.png

I know it's a joke, but religion would be a lot funnier if people didn't actually take it seriously. I personally take all my religious views from Monty Python.

August
12-18-08, 10:57 PM
I know it's a joke, but religion would be a lot funnier if people didn't actually take it seriously. I personally take all my religious views from Monty Python.

But the only one taking it seriously in here is you. :dead:

Bewolf
12-19-08, 05:39 AM
Funny, the version of that story I know ends with the opposite conclusion. :D

Jimbuna
12-19-08, 06:44 AM
I've honestly never come across it before.....nice one :lol:

Raptor1
12-19-08, 06:51 AM
I've honestly never come across it before.....nice one :lol:

Same here

:rotfl::rotfl:

Hylander_1314
12-19-08, 09:47 PM
What if the Bermuda shorts got you into Hell in the first place?

Then all you gotta worry about is the SPF 45 sunblock, and the shades. ;)

Task Force
12-19-08, 09:51 PM
I wonder what happens when the sunblock runs out.:hmm: (Would be a good Idea to get the extra large economy size):lol:

Hylander_1314
12-19-08, 10:12 PM
Better have good stock in the company or just "S.O.L.".

Task Force
12-19-08, 10:18 PM
I can see it now. lol

Person in hell1. Dude why are you so red.

Person in hell2. I ran out of sun screen.

Person in hell1. Ha ha sucker, I got plenty.

Person in hell2. Ya think so.

Person in hell1. ya just look. {puts sun screen in person 1s face}

Person in hell2. SMACK!!! knocks sunscreen on ground and it spills out all over the place.

PIH2. Now were equal. good luck.:lol:

Hylander_1314
12-19-08, 11:08 PM
Either that or they'll have one hell of a tan!

Task Force
12-19-08, 11:09 PM
lol, sunburn from h***.:lol: