9 Things I Hate About Everyone

[SUBMAN1]

Apparently, this is an email going around. Its pretty funny.

-S

9 Things I Hate About Everyone

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2 People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V.. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

3 When people say 'Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too'. Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4 When people say 'it's always the last place you look'. Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!

5 When people say while watching a film 'did you see that?'. No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

6 People who ask 'Can I ask you a question?'.... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7 When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8 When people say 'life is short'. What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks 'Has the bus come yet?'. If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

[STEED]

Apart from number 2 my TV only has on/off button, the rest. :rotfl:

[Jimbuna]

No 9.......One of my all time favourites :rotfl:

[FIREWALL]

:up: :up: :rotfl: :rotfl: :up: :up: :rotfl: :rotfl:


FIREWALL

[Yahoshua]

I'll tack on a personal #10: When right after a bad accident and bleeding profusely. Somebody comes up to you and yells in your face "ARE YOU OKAY!!??"

The following of which is responded to by a string of speech that would never have been uttered under more pleasant circumstances.

[SUBMAN1]

I'll tack on a personal #10: When right after a bad accident and bleeding profusely. Somebody comes up to you and yells in your face "ARE YOU OKAY!!??"

The following of which is responded to by a string of speech that would never have been uttered under more pleasant circumstances.I had to repost. It is totally true! Reminds me when I was a kid and I crashed a go kart hard....

[joegrundman]

I think No.3 is just misunderstanding the expression. It may be an archaism, but i guess in modern english it would be better said as " You want to both keep your cake (for later), and eat it (now) too" which is not a possible choice.

[Kapitan_Phillips]

I got one for you: People who come in to a resteraunt after you, order the exact same thing as you, and get their meals before you do.


:stare:

[FIREWALL]

I'll tack on a personal #10: When right after a bad accident and bleeding profusely. Somebody comes up to you and yells in your face "ARE YOU OKAY!!??"

The following of which is responded to by a string of speech that would never have been uttered under more pleasant circumstances.I had to repost. It is totally true! Reminds me when I was a kid and I crashed a go kart hard....

That brings back fond memories of a kart i built with a 750 honda with a 3 spd aoto trans.

What Fun..:D :D :D

[joea]

No 9.......One of my all time favourites :rotfl:

Actually, if say two or more different bus routes pass the same stop it could make sense to ask "has the bus 7" passed yet when the buses 27 and 11 also stop at the same place like near my place. :p

[August]

I was gonna say this list is as old as dirt but what the heck, life is short.

[jp99gt]

I'll tack on a personal #10: When right after a bad accident and bleeding profusely. Somebody comes up to you and yells in your face "ARE YOU OKAY!!??"

The following of which is responded to by a string of speech that would never have been uttered under more pleasant circumstances. If the person who asks is trained in first aid/CPR, they will ask this question if they follow procedure. You see, if someone is unable to respond, then you have the right to administer first aid by what is known as "implied consent" when they do not respond to that question.

If the person does respond, you next ask, "Do you want help?" If they say no, then you do not have the right to administer aid against their will. If they say yes, you may offer help.

Obviously some (ok, many!) people are just stupid and ask this question. But first aid responders ask this for legal reasons.

[Skybird]

Psychologists know this one:

when somebody gives you two shirts as a gift for birthday, and then you wear one of them, and he/she asks you with a sad face: "What, the other you did not like...?" :dead:

[Blacklight]

8 When people say 'life is short'. What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?


People who say "Life is short" have never played the boardgame :dead:

But I guess it's shorter than "Monotony"..er.. um.. "Monopoly".

[StdDev]

Someone HAS to mention one of the most dumba** questions that can be asked...

"Does this milk taste like its gone over?" or "Does this taste funny to you?"


OH YEAH now I just HAVE to try it... :damn:

[Onkel Neal]

Best post of 2008, so far.

[kiwi_2005]

Apparently, this is an email going around. Its pretty funny.

-S

9 Things I Hate About Everyone

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2 People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V.. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

3 When people say 'Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too'. Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4 When people say 'it's always the last place you look'. Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!

5 When people say while watching a film 'did you see that?'. No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

6 People who ask 'Can I ask you a question?'.... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7 When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8 When people say 'life is short'. What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks 'Has the bus come yet?'. If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

:rotfl::up:

[Kapitan_Phillips]

Here's the ultimate one, with which everyone can sympathise:

Why is it when a female asks you "Which do you prefer?" they either say "I dont like that one" when you pick it, or picks the other one anyway.

[Tchocky]

Here's the ultimate one, with which everyone can sympathise:

Why is it when a female asks you "Which do you prefer?" they either say "I dont like that one" when you pick it, or picks the other one anyway.

Just after you pick one..

"Oh.....OK then"

[Jimbuna]

"Do I look okay in this honey"?

"So what was wrong with the earlier one" ?

[CCIP]

9 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks 'Has the bus come yet?'. If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?
:lol:

Even worse when they ask you in a language you don't know and then look at you like you're an idiot when you don't answer them in the same tongue.

(Yea, yea, I'm just bitter - that happened to me yesterday at a bus stop on the Quebec side of town. I actually understood the question and tried speaking English. She looked at me like I was indeed a total moron and then asked the next person :doh:)

[The Munster]

No 9.......One of my all time favourites :rotfl:

Actually, if say two or more different bus routes pass the same stop it could make sense to ask "has the bus 7" passed yet when the buses 27 and 11 also stop at the same place like near my place. :p

If somebody asks me 'has the Bus come yet ?', I usually reply 'yes, but I'm waiting for two to arrive together so I have a choice' .. end of conversation. :p

[SUBMAN1]

...(Yea, yea, I'm just bitter - that happened to me yesterday at a bus stop on the Quebec side of town. I actually understood the question and tried speaking English. She looked at me like I was indeed a total moron and then asked the next person :doh:)THat is because you know she understands English, but demands to be spoken to in French. I know the type. Seen them many times in Montreal myself.

-S

[Jimbuna]

Another good one is:

A guy falls down in the street and a passer by stops and asks....."Have you fallen down" ?

The guy responds...."No, I'm just trying to break this bar of chocolate I have in my back pocket"

[Sailor Steve]

Hmm. I thought most of them were pretty lame.

Like when Paula Poundstone made her joke about getting hot and heavy with her boyfriend, and he asks her what she wants. "I want a chocolate milkshake! What the hell do you think I want?" Which of course immediately throws out years of women telling us "You never think about my needs!"

Yeah, I thought those were kind of stupid.

[em2nought]

11. The gov't decides to give you a tax break, and then asks you to immediately go out and buy crap from China with it. ;) Didn't buying more(house) than people could afford sort of start this in the first place? If I buy anything, I want to throw it in Boston Harbor. :arrgh!:

[Jimbuna]

11. The gov't decides to give you a tax break, and then asks you to immediately go out and buy crap from China with it. ;) Didn't buying more(house) than people could afford sort of start this in the first place? If I buy anything, I want to throw it in Boston Harbor. :arrgh!:

Yeah, that made me laugh :lol:

I was watching this American guy on the BBC news last night (sorry, can't remember his name) :-?

He said pretty much the same......"The gov't decides to give you a tax break, and then asks you to immediately go out and buy something with it. The problem is, we don't manufacture anything in America anymore" :hmm:

[Yahoshua]

I'll tack on a personal #10: When right after a bad accident and bleeding profusely. Somebody comes up to you and yells in your face "ARE YOU OKAY!!??"

The following of which is responded to by a string of speech that would never have been uttered under more pleasant circumstances. If the person who asks is trained in first aid/CPR, they will ask this question if they follow procedure. You see, if someone is unable to respond, then you have the right to administer first aid by what is known as "implied consent" when they do not respond to that question.

If the person does respond, you next ask, "Do you want help?" If they say no, then you do not have the right to administer aid against their will. If they say yes, you may offer help.

Obviously some (ok, many!) people are just stupid and ask this question. But first aid responders ask this for legal reasons.


I understand that medics need to ask a question like that to get a response, but the concept of asking an injured person if "they're okay" (and they obviously aren't) really rubs me the wrong way. When I ask people who are in need of medical assistance, I ask them where they're hurt, not if they're okay. That way I accomplish the same goals without sounding like an idiot.

[U49]

where can I sign it ?