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View Full Version : OH OH, Balz Sinks 100K on GWX2.0


Brag
01-06-08, 12:41 PM
http://i121.photobucket.com/albums/o207/Braguine/Balz100K.jpg

From U-52
To BDU
30 April 1940

Dear Admiral and the rest of you at BDU

Even the attocious weather cannot prevent a good man such as myself from exceeding heroic expectations. As per my preceeding message, thanks to my great ability and nautical cunning I was able to exceed 100,000 (one hundred thousand) BRT of enemy shipping sunk during one patrol. :smug:

You might have also noticed that my boat is a type VIIB and that my patrol lasted less than one month. I imagine you will go into immediate deliberations as to the medals I should receive. A nice Ritter Kreuz would add prestige to the award, if I wear it. My mother would like it too. :smug:

Although, I have plenty of fuel, I plan to put into Vigo where the fried sardines are the very best. You can mail me the medals there. I plan to make another patrol before returning as a triumphant conqueror to Willhelmshaven.

I can assure you that with my heroic participation, the British will soon surrender. It would also be nice if I got a promotion to Kptlt. It would look good for the Kriegsmarine to promote me. :smug:

Humbly performing my duty
Lt.z.S. Johan Sebastian Balz

P.S. Don't forget I sank the Rodney on my first patrol.

TomcatMVD
01-06-08, 01:50 PM
Congratulations herr Kaleun!:-j

Brag
01-06-08, 01:53 PM
J.S. Balz writes:
Gracias, amigo!:smug:

Sigurd
01-06-08, 01:57 PM
Remind me to buy you a drink when you get back to port. :up:

joea
01-06-08, 01:57 PM
From: Max Konig Commander U-276.

Meet you in Vigo for the sardines, will buy sangria rounds for you and your crew.

U-276 out. :arrgh!:

papa_smurf
01-06-08, 02:09 PM
Heinz Buder writes:

to my dearest Balz, congratulations on another sucessfull patrol, and on sinking 100k tons yet again. Maybe now the Royal Navy will give up the hunt for you, and you can go on and become Germany's greatest hero.

All the best, and drinks are on me on your return.

Blacklight
01-06-08, 03:03 PM
Wow ! Does the Royal Navy have any ships left at all for US to sink !?!:o

NiclDoe
01-06-08, 08:53 PM
J.S. Balz writes:
Gracias, amigo!:smug:
see!! Balz is spanish!!!!:rotfl: :rotfl:

Kaleu. Jochen Mohr
01-06-08, 10:37 PM
:nope: there comes more ego

Brag
01-06-08, 11:16 PM
J.S. Balz writes:
Gracias, amigo!:smug:
see!! Balz is spanish!!!!:rotfl: :rotfl:

Nein, mein liber Freund, non, mon cher ami, hapana rafiki yango, nyet, moy dorogoi drug, no, meo amigo.

But I spikest English bezt. :D

Sailor Steve
01-07-08, 11:56 AM
J.S. Balz writes:
Gracias, amigo!:smug:
see!! Balz is spanish!!!!:rotfl: :rotfl:

Nein, mein liber Freund, non, mon cher ami, hapana rafiki yango, nyet, moy dorogoi drug, no, meo amigo.

But I spikest English bezt. :D
Si, he has to use the lingo because he's writing from Vigo. It's an 'undercover' thing.

Note to Balz from Russian admirer Biziat Jakanov: Jur Engliz is werdy gud, kamerad. I cud be fooled myzelf from thinkink ju might be Amerikaner.

TomcatMVD
01-07-08, 02:29 PM
J.S. Balz writes:
Gracias, amigo!:smug:
Now that's being a clever guy!

sunvalleyslim
01-08-08, 01:29 AM
Herr Balz,
Kapt Willi Luck sends all his best. He has been imprisoned in the U.S., along with his crew. They are relaxing and playing volleyball on Venice Beach Ca.
They are inviting you come and enjoy the sun and fun........
Regards,
CMDR R. Fudge
Commanding officer POW Camp #103

Stealth Hunter
01-08-08, 03:07 AM
0800 Hours
01/5/1940
-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

To : U-52 (Leutnant J. Balz)
From : Kptlt. Erich von Stroppel (Flotilla 7)

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Leutnant Balz,


BdU sent me the news of your 100,000+ claim. Good to hear we've got someone to match up to the standards of the aces of today. Unfortunately, the Olympics have been cancelled. No hoochie woochie to interrupt the stadium I'm afraid. Fortunately, we've gotten word of a fat convoy lurking around Loch Ewe. Got about 30 freighters in her, or so I'm told from Herr Dönitz. I've had to sit in a few meetings with him these past couple of days regarding the status of our U-boat fleet.

In response to this great achievement, I am sending to you 3 crystal containers filled with cognac, vintage 1810 (100 years before my birth) and a typewriter (personally for you). This should make those long voyages easier and also more exciting, though I'm requesting that you keep the cognac at base due to the conditions of U-boats, as you're already educated on. Note that the typewriter is the latest model, and it's much easier to use than those primitive ones our parents were using during the Great War. Hope you enjoy it.

Must go now. We're reviewing plans on a new U-boat that we might be able to put into comission early next year.


Hals- und Beinbruch!



-Kapitänleutnant Von Stroppel

Brag
01-09-08, 06:43 AM
Herr Balz,
Kapt Willi Luck sends all his best. He has been imprisoned in the U.S., along with his crew. They are relaxing and playing volleyball on Venice Beach Ca.
They are inviting you come and enjoy the sun and fun........
Regards,
CMDR R. Fudge
Commanding officer POW Camp #103

Dear Commander Fudge,
Thank you for your kind invitation. Besides the Three Stooges, southern California doesn't have the essential hoochie woochies for my cultural development. I plan to continue displaying my skillful volleyballing on European beaches.

Lt.z.S. Johan Sebastian Balz
Kriegsmarine

Brag
01-09-08, 06:55 AM
0800 Hours
01/5/1940
-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

To : U-52 (Leutnant J. Balz)
From : Kptlt. Erich von Stroppel (Flotilla 7)

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Leutnant Balz,


BdU sent me the news of your 100,000+ claim. Good to hear we've got someone to match up to the standards of the aces of today. Unfortunately, the Olympics have been cancelled. No hoochie woochie to interrupt the stadium I'm afraid. Fortunately, we've gotten word of a fat convoy lurking around Loch Ewe. Got about 30 freighters in her . . .
-Kapitänleutnant Von Stroppel

Loch Ewe? Eeeeeeew!
The flotilla surgeon says my fabulous physique has a severe allergy to shallow water. It has to do with salt concentrations that seriously shorten the life span of heroic and talented U-boot Komandants such as myself. :smug:

Thanks you for the ancient cognac. That is very hoochie woochie. :smug:

LT.z.S. Johan Sebastian Balz
A hero dedicated to the service of the Vaterland.:smug:

Stealth Hunter
01-11-08, 12:31 AM
This hoochie woochie has become like Fonzie saying, "Heeyyyyyy!":up: :up:

Avatar
01-11-08, 02:15 PM
Congrats!:arrgh!:

Brag
01-11-08, 10:40 PM
This hoochie woochie has become like Fonzie saying, "Heeyyyyyy!":up: :up:

Oblt.z.S. J.S. Balz writes:

Non Schmops Kapop reinforces hoochie woochie boom-boom. :smug:

Kpt. Lehmann
01-11-08, 10:54 PM
Gezundheit!:huh:

Blacklight
01-11-08, 11:44 PM
I'm still waiting for Balz to sink the entire British Isles and not just her ships. :rotfl:

"Great Britain went down today for a total of 50000000000000000 billion tons thanks to Kaleun Balz for this remarkable achievement !"

johan_d
01-12-08, 01:08 AM
From: BDU
To : U52

BE MORE AGGRESSIVE!

ENDE

siber
01-12-08, 06:40 AM
This hoochie woochie has become like Fonzie saying, "Heeyyyyyy!":up: :up:

Do I get shot for asking: Who's Fonzie? I don't understand...

Brag
01-12-08, 11:16 AM
Yeah, who is Fonzie? How did he get in here? :shifty:

Sailor Steve
01-12-08, 12:43 PM
"Aaaaayyy!"

The Fonz:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fonzie

me262
01-12-08, 12:51 PM
That explains why I can never find anything to sink:damn: