Your views on

[Kapitan]

Marridge as in wedding getting hitched ect excuse the spelling

How do you view this old age ceramony is it really just a piece of paper ? or just a licence to surrender everything you own or what?

Or is it a means just to make some money?

Just your views on the matter please

And no flames !

[STEED]

Hang on just putting out the fire....................;) :lol:

Well I'm single, so no help there. :doh:

But in this modern day and age marriage seems to me that it holds no water with most people today who get married. I'm not saying all, but there are many who just think it's a piece of paper and that's it.

[Sailor Steve]

I was married for 11 years, and didn't regret a bit of it except for the ending.

[XabbaRus]

Well I made no money on my marriage and the Labs I think took away the Married Couples Tax allowance.

I think it is good, glad I did it and won't break it.

I just can't stand this whole, my partner crap, its either boyfriend r girlfriend or fiance/fiancee. Also what bugs me is one couple I know, "we are engaged but no plans to get married." Huh, then what is the point.

Also I don't get it when people have kids together but don't get married.

People are afraid to commit getting marriage is a sign of that commitment because getting out of it isn't cheap. Ok I'm sure there are people who have been divorced here and with good reason and I don't mean to upset them, I'm sure they wanted it to work. Sometimes it doesn't and its a genuine mistake though I know a few people who should never have got married but did. Kind of like Ross in Friends.

[Letum]

Well, ultimatly it is a legal agreement that people usualy attach emotions to.

What emotions people attach to it varys wildly.

What it shouldn't be is a contract to fidelity, if you need to get married for fidelity's
sake, then perhaps you don't have the best of relationships to start with.



*edit*
http://www.b3tards.com/u/57a418c694bc7c6296b3/nudefoot.jpg

[Kapitan]

Me personally i have no plans to get married, but no doubt that will change, its also like i dont want kids either but again that can change.My friend who was married for 7 years unwrapped his divorce papers for his christmas present last christmas, i wonder what he going to get for his birthday.

[Tchocky]

Well, ultimatly it is a legal agreement that people usualy attach emotions to.

What emotions people attach to it varys wildly.

What it shouldn't be is a contract to fidelity, if you need to get married for fidelity's
sake, then perhaps you don't have the best of relationships to start with.

3k posts! Subsim demands nudity!

[STEED]

3k posts! Subsim demands nudity!

You can not be serious. :o

[Tchocky]

3k posts! Subsim demands nudity!
You can not be serious. :o
I remember Letum posting about another forum he frequents where that's a tradiition every time someone breaks a thousand posts. At least I think it was Letum.
O

[Kapitan_Phillips]

Marridge as in wedding getting hitched ect excuse the spelling

How do you view this old age ceramony is it really just a piece of paper ? or just a licence to surrender everything you own or what?

Or is it a means just to make some money?

Just your views on the matter please

And no flames !

This wouldnt in any way be related to you wanted to move to the US, would it? ;)

[Skybird]

Usually I would not pay too much attention to how two people arrange the way in which they wish to live together. But once there are children of these two, I find it a good idea to make it somewhat more binding and obligatory by law to stay together and care for the children, and make it less easy to split apart. Thats the idea why families are under special protection by the state and the laws: the children. For the same reason I am strictly against equalizing homosexual partnerships to heterosexual marriages. Couples eventually produce children by their own, and to raise kids is an enomous enterprise. Homosexual partnerships do not compare to these risks, efforts, and longterm commitmeents to protect some vulnerable (while small) people. That political correctness these days has led to attempts to give an impression that such relations equal the social value and deserve special protection of hetero couples (who potentially always must be considered to produce children), shows how idiotic and perverted PC in this regard is.

That is also the way the German constitution sees it, and mentions it. People who argue against the special status of families and want to relativise it regarding homosexual relations being turned into "marriages", do not understand the importance this institution has for our social communities. You marry for the sake of planned or possibly, accidentally produced children - not for tax reliefs, or social repuation for yourself being gay or lesbian. That's how it has been since long time, and i think that is how it should be.

Not discriminating homosexuals - yes. Hetero-marriages and the same legal status for marriages between homos, like for normal families - no, I totally oppose it. And in no way I see that as discrimination. I am not discriminated myself for not having dark but blond hair, even if I would have preferred the dark hair.

I would mourn about the egoism and stupditiy that express themselves in the number of divorces, and the many young women raising kids all alone. do you really need to jump into bed with every first ooportunity stranger, must you really share your bed without taking precautionary measures when you live solo, or are all so young? Toomoften people come togteher that in no way seem to match, and short time later they divorce again. This kind of behavior and thoughtlessness illustrates unripe minds even if the people are already 25 or 30 or older, and a lacking sense of commitment ans responsibility. Sexual revolution? nice and well, but it also lead to massive dose of socially subsidized egoism - and the community should help and pay for this kind of thoughtlessness. Somebody having a new partner every three weeks should not be admired or labelled "cool", but should be expelled , or having had a serious word with in order to clean jis sick or unripe mind - it depends on the single case. That V"I"Ps give so bad examples in these regards, nevertheless are admired as idols, certainly is not helpful. In the end it all shows how degenerated out precious Western social communties have become, if these precious special social communties more and more are unable to make sure that people are being raised and become adult in a climate that would educate them accordingly regarding that they are better prepared and somewhat immune to act that selfishly and stupidly. If you accept idiots being idols for your kids, do not wonder if your kids become idiots themselves. This you will not cure neither by endless oh so wellmeaning softtalking pedagogic efforts nor by endless migration badly -edcuated patriarchalic people from different cultures that live by the the principles of male chieftains tyrannizing their families at home - both wife and sons. both things just make sure that coditions become constantly worse, while educational and social elites leave and head for better places in other countries, or even continents.

[kiwi_2005]

Marriage been there done that, Next!

You got to work at it, like any realationship, just dont let boredom settle in.

These are wise words from a total failure when it comes to marriage :p

[AVGWarhawk]

I've been married for 14 years. Got two munchkins as a result. Relationship is good and not boring. It does take work. Got to keep in mind that people do not change. If she is a certain way while you date, she will be the same after marriage. Don't think you'll change someone, it just does not happen. I certainly do not miss the dating game and bar hopping. And like everything else, you got to give a little to get a little.

[Chock]

Just passed my seventh wedding anniversary a couple of weeks ago (22nd December).

You have to be sure that it's really what you want, that's for sure, and even then it's still something of a gamble, because who can say for sure what they want in 10 or 20 years' time? My marriage works because we make a good team, forget all that true love will see you through bollocks, that's okay, but it's not enough, you have to be sure you can have a good time when the shine wears off the 'honeymoon period' of your relationship. And you have to share things as well as have your own space and interests too. There are sacrifices to be made, but if you make sacrifices in equal measure, then it's no hardship.

Better make sure you've sewn your wild oats first though, so if you still like the idea of banging anything that could fog a mirror, then it's too early for you to consider it:rotfl:

:D Chock

[lesrae]

I've been married 7½ years and I did it because one day it just clicked that the woman I was with was the one I wanted to be with for the rest of my life - I already new I was in love with her but this was an entirely different feeling. While we could have stayed together without being married, I'm a bit old fashioned and still see marriage as a commitment and as a sign of commitment, it's something I'll fight tooth and nail to hold on to.

The only weddings I don't really agree with are those who do it just for a party, or as a demonstration of wealth and extravegance - to me that's wrong. I'm also fairly strongly opposed to non-believers getting married in church, it's too hypocritical for my taste and I don't even like attending them.

[orwell]

I've been married 7½ years and I did it because one day it just clicked that the woman I was with was the one I wanted to be with for the rest of my life - I already new I was in love with her but this was an entirely different feeling. While we could have stayed together without being married, I'm a bit old fashioned and still see marriage as a commitment and as a sign of commitment, it's something I'll fight tooth and nail to hold on to.

Sounds about right to me, the actual 'marriage/wedding process' to me should just be getting your feelings set down on a legal document, not some sort of extravagent celebration. Finding a woman who shares this belief is another matter entirely.

[Letum]

3k posts! Subsim demands nudity!
You can not be serious. :o I remember Letum posting about another forum he frequents where that's a tradiition every time someone breaks a thousand posts. At least I think it was Letum.
O


Quite right!
How could I miss the 3k mark? :huh:
Post edited. ;)

[XabbaRus]

Well I have been married 6 years last December ( wow that is weird posting that ) and I'm happy. Yes it has been hard work but you work through the problems. It seems in the UK a lot of divorces are because people give up to easily or they jumped straight in to the marriage boat without thinking.

As for extravagent or expensive weddings, isn't that pretty much most weddings in the UK given the average cost is £14,000. I just can't see the point of the big wedding inviting every tom dick and harry. Seen it too many times. A small wedding with close friends and family and all are invited to the ceremony and all to the reception and dance. I hate this thing we have in the UK now where you invite you family and best pals to the ceremony, then some more to the recpetion, and then last of all you invite your workmates and other people you know down the pub to the disco at the end. Either the people you invite are good enough for the whole thing or none of it. What is worse when someone at work gets married and you have to put something in the collection. Fine if you have worked with the person a number of years and you know them quite well. Not when they have been there a couple of months....arrggggg rant over.

[Tchocky]

Just hit 6 months with the girlfriend :)

Marraige has never hugely appealed to me, but I might change yet.
Skybird, I don't understand some of your post.
Thats the idea why families are under special protection by the state and the laws: the children. For the same reason I am strictly against equalizing homosexual partnerships to heterosexual marriages. Couples eventually produce children by their own, and to raise kids is an enomous enterprise. Homosexual partnerships do not compare to these risks, efforts, and longterm commitmeents to protect some vulnerable (while small) people. That political correctness these days has led to attempts to give an impression that such relations equal the social value and deserve special protection of hetero couples (who potentially always must be considered to produce children), shows how idiotic and perverted PC in this regard is.
How would extending marraiges to homosexuals harm the protection of children? That gay couples don't produce children shouldn't limit their recognition in the eyes of the law, and the future possibility of children is not what should underly the concept of marraige.
Anyways, we're talking about a rather small group of people here.

[Blacklight]

Don't even get me started on people who are prejudiced about homosexuals getting married and raising kids. I have two homosexual friends who are married and are raising kids as we speak and the kids are wonderful and there has been no problems with them. We as a society need to keep our minds open about these things. I won't go further except to say that I believe that people who oppose gay marriage and gays raising children are biggoted in the same way that the KKK is biggoted.:nope:
I won't continue discussing this subject further considering how it angers me.:stare:

As for marriage.. My wife and I both believe that it's a cash crop business and we rebelled against it for our wedding. My wife shunned the big white dress that makes weomen look like shower poofs. I wore my suit and she wore a likewise pink dressy outfit that she would wear to a job interview. We got married in her dad's front yard with a ceremony done by a Unitarian minister which we set the vows up pretty much to be, "Do you ? Do you ? Kiss the bride, you're married." We then changed into shorts and T-shirts. We had wacky party favors like clown noses and toys to play with all over the place. It was a lot like a kid's front yard barbeque except with adults running around playing with the toys and games. Our wedding cake was made of cupcakes.

There was no big white wedding in a church.. no reception hall... no DJ spinning out annoying tunes or getting everyone to do "The train" or "The chicken dance". We had been to so many of those weddings and each one was the same and we were so board by them. The way we got married.. no one was board. Everyone had a blast. It was so much more relaxing. Instead of going to an open bar and waiting in line to order a beer or wait for a waiter.. you would just go over to the local cooler and grab a cold one. It was the most fun wedding everyone had ever attended and the wedding industry hardly made a dime off of us.:D

[fatty]

Just hit 6 months with the girlfriend :)

Marraige has never hugely appealed to me, but I might change yet.
Skybird, I don't understand some of your post.
Thats the idea why families are under special protection by the state and the laws: the children. For the same reason I am strictly against equalizing homosexual partnerships to heterosexual marriages. Couples eventually produce children by their own, and to raise kids is an enomous enterprise. Homosexual partnerships do not compare to these risks, efforts, and longterm commitmeents to protect some vulnerable (while small) people. That political correctness these days has led to attempts to give an impression that such relations equal the social value and deserve special protection of hetero couples (who potentially always must be considered to produce children), shows how idiotic and perverted PC in this regard is.
How would extending marraiges to homosexuals harm the protection of children? That gay couples don't produce children shouldn't limit their recognition in the eyes of the law, and the future possibility of children is not what should underly the concept of marraige.
Anyways, we're talking about a rather small group of people here.

I think what Skybird was trying to say is that he feels homosexual couples do not have to weigh on the possibility of procreating when deciding to get hitched, which he thinks is an anchor for heterosexual marriage. Without concerns of raising and maintaining a stable family and household, a homosexual couple won't enter into marriage quite as seriously. I think.

[Blacklight]

I think what Skybird was trying to say is that he feels homosexual couples do not have to weigh on the possibility of procreating when deciding to get hitched, which he thinks is an anchor for heterosexual marriage. Without concerns of raising and maintaining a stable family and household, a homosexual couple won't enter into marriage quite as seriously. I think.

So.. my wife and I don't plan on having any kids ever because I have a pretty hefty bunch of genetic dissorders and I don't want to bring a child into the world with any possibility of him/her getting the same dissabilities I have. Also, neither of us can afford kids... let alone are we interested in adoption. Therefore, does that make it so we should never have gotten married ?

Oh.. and the homosexual couples I know take their vows very seriously btw.

[fatty]

I think what Skybird was trying to say is that he feels homosexual couples do not have to weigh on the possibility of procreating when deciding to get hitched, which he thinks is an anchor for heterosexual marriage. Without concerns of raising and maintaining a stable family and household, a homosexual couple won't enter into marriage quite as seriously. I think.

So.. my wife and I don't plan on having any kids ever because I have a pretty hefty bunch of genetic dissorders and I don't want to bring a child into the world with any possibility of him/her getting the same dissabilities I have. Also, neither of us can afford kids... let alone are we interested in adoption. Therefore, does that make it so we should never have gotten married ?

Oh.. and the homosexual couples I know take their vows very seriously btw.

I don't know, I didn't say I agreed with what I read, just simply what I took his message to mean. Don't shoot the messenger :-?

[baggygreen]

Stay tuned, folks.... watch this space:)

I clicked a while ago, I'd always anticipated that id find someone and have. My lil baby sister (hardly, shes 20 now...:-?) has always said she will never marry nor have kids, shes still stoic in that approach. Me, hell i love kids. I'll just try go to timor or the solomans on a posting about 3 days after their birth for a 9 month rotation - that way, i wont be woken up all night!:yep: Course, i'll probably be shot if i ever tell the boss lady that:lol:

I think its good, personally im not pro-gay marriages and im not pro-gay parents, but everyone has an opinion and rights, and i've got the decency to respect that. For mine, it stems more from me being a traditionalist in a lot of ways, rather than from me being homophobic (i used to love the gay nightclub in town - best music, cheap drinks).

btw, :rotfl:at KP, i cant believe YOU of all people said that!!! Passing on trade secrets???;):rotfl::rotfl:

[GunnerGreg]

Been married to the same woman for nearly 25 years now. Like life, it has its ups and downs, but I can honestly say that I've been more often happy than not, and we survived some pretty serious problems.

My Grandmother was married to same man for 50+ years and he made her life a living hell, but she stayed with him because she was raised in a culture that taught "marriage was for life, no matter what".

My sister is on her third partner, probably won't marry this one (the first two marriages didn't work out so well, obviously).

My oldest cousin is on her second marriage and this one will probably stick, at least if the kids from the first marriage don't drive them apart.

My middle cousin is on her third partner (maybe fourth) and her life is a total mess.

My youngest cousin is just recently married, but I expect this one to last.

My parents divorced when I was in college, so it didn't really impact me that much. It hit my sister pretty hard and messed her up pretty good.

On the other hand, my wife's parents stayed married until he passed away, despite some serious problems, which, IMHO, messed a couple of my sister-in-laws up pretty good.

My point is, there is no ONE right answer for everyone. It's not black or white. Like life, it's shades of grey.

[Skybird]

Just hit 6 months with the girlfriend :)

Marraige has never hugely appealed to me, but I might change yet.
Skybird, I don't understand some of your post.
Thats the idea why families are under special protection by the state and the laws: the children. For the same reason I am strictly against equalizing homosexual partnerships to heterosexual marriages. Couples eventually produce children by their own, and to raise kids is an enomous enterprise. Homosexual partnerships do not compare to these risks, efforts, and longterm commitmeents to protect some vulnerable (while small) people. That political correctness these days has led to attempts to give an impression that such relations equal the social value and deserve special protection of hetero couples (who potentially always must be considered to produce children), shows how idiotic and perverted PC in this regard is.
How would extending marraiges to homosexuals harm the protection of children? That gay couples don't produce children shouldn't limit their recognition in the eyes of the law, and the future possibility of children is not what should underly the concept of marraige.
Anyways, we're talking about a rather small group of people here.
It is not doing active damage to children, but the relativating of the position of the institution that should have no one-amongst-other but a special status - for the sake of making it clear that the kids are under special protection by the state, and ideally, the community as well. That'S why they should be seen as something thatd stands out from the suual norms of living in couples, and should have finaical support that other forms of living together should not be able to take benefit from. You suggestion of seing homo-marriages as of the same value or type as families - effectively neutralizes this intention to line out that children and their interests should have a special status: a status that ranks higher than the interests for public representation of homosexual couples.

I am supoorting our coinstitution in this detail. I also agree with the churches in this aspect of their views on what marriage is. Marriage and children goes together hand in hand. And it has to be seen as a high value asset for the community, and has soemthing of higher value and importance than homosexual "marriages". Honstely, I even cannot take the term serious. It is a contradiction in itself. Marriage means one man and one women. that is it's meaning at the most basic fundament, and always has been - and i think it should stay that way.

[Skybird]

Don't even get me started on people who are prejudiced about homosexuals getting married and raising kids. I have two homosexual friends who are married and are raising kids as we speak and the kids are wonderful and there has been no problems with them. We as a society need to keep our minds open about these things. I won't go further except to say that I believe that people who oppose gay marriage and gays raising children are biggoted in the same way that the KKK is biggoted.:nope:
So I am a proud owner of a white cap now? As I said in an earlier topic some months ago, I am not discirminating homsexuals, nor do I have any problem to deal with, and in fact I reffred to people whith whom I had good friendships and working together. But they - like me - totally objected shameful displays like Christopher Streetdays, and they (all being psychologist students like me) said they saw no reason in adapting children to raise them in a gay partnership, when it obviously was not meant by mother Nature to work this way. Parents are taken as examples by their children, and a mother is a female role scheme., like a ftaher is a male role scheme - children learn different things from both, and so it is a safe assumption that they also need both. We know that there is a significantly raised risk of later behavioral symptoms in children who were raised by one person only, missing mum or dad, and that it affects their way of approaching the other sex later on. We also know that it leads to different psychological attitudes if you are raised as asingle kid, or have sisters or brothers. the social community context forms us, and especially children. I know that there are psychological projects trying to prove that it makes no difference if the paretns are two of the same sex, or a mixed couple. But as a former insider of psychology, I am aware of how easy it is to inflouence a study project for the desired outcome, and I am also aware of the strong tendency in psychology to line up with what politicially is wanted, that way winning an ally that it needs to bolster it'S own fundament in society, and winning power and influence on the basis of PC. that is no exaggeration, but has something to do with the whole of psychology's history, the way it started, and it's initial - and still lasting - inferiority complex it suffered by coinstantly comparing itself to the established harcore sciences, namely physics.

As a general rule I think that children being raised by a homosexual couple, devellpe differently than children of a heterosexual couple. Where a man having children with a women and later finds out he is gay, eventually should be allowed to take his kids with him if the woiman does not take them (like sometimes one of the parents dies and the kids stay with the surviving nevertheless), I rule out the option of adopting foreign children by homo couples, under normal circumstances. Like usually for adopting foreign chikldren couples (hetero) are preferred to single people living alone. Hetero parents are the natural condition for children to be rasied, and that is the way nature wnated it to be - last but not least for psychological reasons. ;)

[Skybird]

I think what Skybird was trying to say is that he feels homosexual couples do not have to weigh on the possibility of procreating when deciding to get hitched, which he thinks is an anchor for heterosexual marriage. Without concerns of raising and maintaining a stable family and household, a homosexual couple won't enter into marriage quite as seriously. I think.

So.. my wife and I don't plan on having any kids ever because I have a pretty hefty bunch of genetic dissorders and I don't want to bring a child into the world with any possibility of him/her getting the same dissabilities I have. Also, neither of us can afford kids... let alone are we interested in adoption. Therefore, does that make it so we should never have gotten married ?

Oh.. and the homosexual couples I know take their vows very seriously btw.

I said in my first post that if you create a new nation-wide law, you depend on giving it a form that is general enough to make it valid for most cases - the more you want to cover the individual case, the more complex it becomes, special rules apply, implications, etc etc. Most occaisons seeing a man and a woman marrying, they are yolung enough to have kids. Ofdtehn they plan it, sometimes they just intend to see what will come, and sometimes they do not plan for kids, but that there will be kids nevertheless is a chance. So this is the example by which you design the law then: man plus woman leads to children. this is a realsitic chnace, it happens most often of all constellation you can imagine, so this is what the law has to cover. therefor your law will imply that marriage deserves special protection, recognition and financial aide for the sake of the children it is likely to produce.

[Skybird]

I think what Skybird was trying to say is that he feels homosexual couples do not have to weigh on the possibility of procreating when deciding to get hitched, which he thinks is an anchor for heterosexual marriage. Without concerns of raising and maintaining a stable family and household, a homosexual couple won't enter into marriage quite as seriously. I think.

So.. my wife and I don't plan on having any kids ever because I have a pretty hefty bunch of genetic dissorders and I don't want to bring a child into the world with any possibility of him/her getting the same dissabilities I have. Also, neither of us can afford kids... let alone are we interested in adoption. Therefore, does that make it so we should never have gotten married ?

Oh.. and the homosexual couples I know take their vows very seriously btw.

I think what Skybird was trying to say is that he feels homosexual couples do not have to weigh on the possibility of procreating when deciding to get hitched, which he thinks is an anchor for heterosexual marriage. Without concerns of raising and maintaining a stable family and household, a homosexual couple won't enter into marriage quite as seriously. I think.
More or less, yes, that'S what I think. And as I said, I think espoeiclaly oyung ones take the decison too light, often for egoistic reasons, and thus the vow is not taken seriously, and divorce rates go up. whent he first problems show up, many people choose to go the easy way and opt to separate, instead of trying to save it, which may requite efforts and more sacrifices from both. If you are not willing the latter, you should not marry - that simple it is.

[Skybird]

What I said, mostly affects the level of jurisdiction and children's proetction, this is what makes it object to regulations by the state. These are my main argument for being against homo marriages - on the other hand I would accept and support any laws that allow a homsexual partner to inherit at the same conditions like normal couples do, with the same taxation level. during life time I think homo couples nevertheless should be object to the same taxation level like singles and unmarried couples, in order to line out once again that the family (potential kids) enjoyes special rights, protection and priviliges comoared to any arbitray friendship or other partnership. for me it's not about discriminating somebody, but to give families/children a sepcial status and finacial support. Taxes are one tool here. And why should a partnership institution that never can give back to the community by producing children, receive benefits from the community that were meant to help the child thing? This is true for singles, and homo marriages. Nobody has a right to get money from the community just because he lives in partnership, is friend with somebody, wants to spend his life with somebody! that is not what the state has an obligation to do, that is not what the legal conception of marriage is about.

But let'S not forget that marriage also is a religious institution, and over the course of history this meaning is dominant. On this level, marriage is defined by the church. The church defines it as a life-long relation between a man and a woman. The defintion does not cinldue two males or two females. That's what marriage is, period. To say there is a homosexual marriage is like saying "this is a blue yeloow", "this tastes loud". It does not make sense.

It is not different in Judaism, Islam, hinduaism, Buddhism, as far as I am aware. Compared to this long tradition, the latest legal experiments of the modern era still need to prove themselves. It is 3 or 4 decades compared to several millenia.

[bradclark1]

Marriage is saying you are committing yourself wholly to your partner in good times as well as bad. Sounds like the vow but thats what it is. If you feel you can't, then don't make any long term plans cause it probably won't last that long.

[Iceman]

1 Corinthians 7

[1] Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.
[2] Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.
[3] Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.
[4] The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.
[5] Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
[6] But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment.
[7] For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that.
[8] I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I.
[9] But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.
[10] And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband:
[11] But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.
[12] But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away.
[13] And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him.
[14] For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.
[15] But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.
[16] For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?
[17] But as God hath distributed to every man, as the Lord hath called every one, so let him walk. And so ordain I in all churches.
[18] Is any man called being circumcised? let him not become uncircumcised. Is any called in uncircumcision? let him not be circumcised.
[19] Circumcision is nothing, and uncircumcision is nothing, but the keeping of the commandments of God.
[20] Let every man abide in the same calling wherein he was called.
[21] Art thou called being a servant? care not for it: but if thou mayest be made free, use it rather.
[22] For he that is called in the Lord, being a servant, is the Lord's freeman: likewise also he that is called, being free, is Christ's servant.
[23] Ye are bought with a price; be not ye the servants of men.
[24] Brethren, let every man, wherein he is called, therein abide with God.
[25] Now concerning virgins I have no commandment of the Lord: yet I give my judgment, as one that hath obtained mercy of the Lord to be faithful.
[26] I suppose therefore that this is good for the present distress, I say, that it is good for a man so to be.
[27] Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not to be loosed. Art thou loosed from a wife? seek not a wife.
[28] But and if thou marry, thou hast not sinned; and if a virgin marry, she hath not sinned. Nevertheless such shall have trouble in the flesh: but I spare you.
[29] But this I say, brethren, the time is short: it remaineth, that both they that have wives be as though they had none;
[30] And they that weep, as though they wept not; and they that rejoice, as though they rejoiced not; and they that buy, as though they possessed not;
[31] And they that use this world, as not abusing it: for the fashion of this world passeth away.
[32] But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord:
[33] But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife.
[34] There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.
[35] And this I speak for your own profit; not that I may cast a snare upon you, but for that which is comely, and that ye may attend upon the Lord without distraction.
[36] But if any man think that he behaveth himself uncomely toward his virgin, if she pass the flower of her age, and need so require, let him do what he will, he sinneth not: let them marry.
[37] Nevertheless he that standeth stedfast in his heart, having no necessity, but hath power over his own will, and hath so decreed in his heart that he will keep his virgin, doeth well.
[38] So then he that giveth her in marriage doeth well; but he that giveth her not in marriage doeth better.
[39] The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.
[40] But she is happier if she so abide, after my judgment: and I think also that I have the Spirit of God.



Better to marry than to burn...

Plus even God said... :)

Genesis 2
[18] And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.

If you can live without a woman then you'll do better in your service to God but Most cannot do without the other half...we are hard wired this way.


My 2 cents....be fruitiful and multiply. :up:

[Skybird]

My 2 cents....be fruitiful and multiply. :up:

2 cents indeed.

http://img293.imageshack.us/img293/2307/somaliagk2.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

[Iceman]

My 2 cents....be fruitiful and multiply. :up:

2 cents indeed.

http://img293.imageshack.us/img293/2307/somaliagk2.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Hey Skybird....Just because you cant find a mate who can tolerate you no need to post pictures of your childhood to scare off Kap....you are one negative,depressing individual who likes to drag everyone down in the muck...your wallowing gets old.....OLd.....and saggy just like those.

Go find the balance Daniel son....grasshopper.


add another penny for Skybird.
I have 13years of marriage under my belt....what do you have Skybird? besides a rosy palm?

Kap...have you ever met people who have been married for like 50+years?
What do you think they're secret is?

LOVE dude....LOVE...and remained best friends I guarentee every one of them will tell you.

[Letum]

Hey Skybird....Just because you cant find a mate who can tolerate you no need to post pictures of your childhood to scare off Kap....you are one negative,depressing individual who likes to drag everyone down in the muck...your wallowing gets old.....OLd.....and saggy just like those.

Go find the balance Daniel son....grasshopper.


add another penny for Skybird.


Personal insults?
:shifty: Thats outta line Ice.

[Iceman]

Hey Skybird....Just because you cant find a mate who can tolerate you no need to post pictures of your childhood to scare off Kap....you are one negative,depressing individual who likes to drag everyone down in the muck...your wallowing gets old.....OLd.....and saggy just like those.

Go find the balance Daniel son....grasshopper.


add another penny for Skybird.


Personal insults?
:shifty: Thats outta line Ice.
Hey thats Skyboys pic not mine....Outa line was him insulting my post....where is the life experience he speaks from? posting that pic lit my fire ,I was not speaking to him the thread is Kaps.

[Ducimus]

How do you view this old age ceramony is it really just a piece of paper ? or just a licence to surrender everything you own or what?

Or is it a means just to make some money?

Just your views on the matter please

And no flames !


Marriage is alot of things. In the service, ive seen "contract marriages" where two people would get married, simply because theyd make more money. The governtment pays BAS and BAQ if your married, which means a bigger monthy paystub. Do those people love each other? Not usually. Infact, these marriages are anything but faithful.

Then there are gold diggers, who, hook a poor sucker in, just to make a living off his ass. Also while in the service, Ive seen a few guys that were a bit wet behind the ears in life and find themselves suckered into a ready made family. Some women who live near a military base are, both smart, and well, their just a bitch. Simply put. These guys later on, their just miserable.

Then theres the marriages of people who think they love each other, or are just in love with the idea. The hopeless romantics who pick up whatever comes there way. These never last once they wake up and smell the stink that is reality. (see gold digger)

Then the rare marriages of people who've been exposed to enough in life to know the score, these people will usually get married, say i love you, and mean it.

But whatever marriage you get into, theres the reality of the paper work. Its not all this romantic crap of "ohh i found my mate!" and all that mushy crap. Its also a leagally binding contract, and if your partner doesnt have both oars in the water, they WILL drag you down. Money is always the bottom line, even with marriages.

Case in point is my girlfriend of 6 years. Not married yet, and so long as she has her head up her ass finincially, i will never pop that question. Every time a credtior calls looking for her, it makes me glad that i have my head screwed on straight. Cause, they can't touch me! If i married her, how now they could come after me, and i woudlnt have any of that. Eventually, i know we'd end up divorced anyway because of her finances.

So from my perspective, its just a legally binding contract, and one that i wont enter in anytime soon. Way i see it, you can live like your married, say i love, take care of each other in sickness and in health, and and all that stuff, and so long as the finances are kept seperate, theres not as much to argue about, and makes things a whole lot better. When she F**ks up, most i have to worry about, is the gas bill being paid on time. If we were married, whooaaaaa nellie.. no thanks, i keep my finances on the up and up, and ill be damed if anyones gonna screw that up for me, i dont care who they are.

[TarJak]

I've been married for nearly twenty years and still have not even come close to getting bored or disinterested.

Yes it does take an effort but the main efforts are in reality not that hard to do if you are confident and able to trust the person you are married to:

Trust is the number one requirement, even for contract marriages.
Listening to each other. Even if it means hearing things that may be painful or boring. Though in a contract marriage you can ignore pretty much everything that is said except the legally binding contract bits.
Supporting each other's decisions and being tolerant of their point of view means you may have to make some sacrifices to make things work, but if you love each other and trust each other enough you should both be prepared to make some sacrifices even if it's just to get along.
Don't sweat the small stuff and concentrate on why you entered into the contract in the first place.

[Skybird]

Hey Skybird....Just because you cant find a mate who can tolerate you no need to post pictures of your childhood to scare off Kap....you are one negative,depressing individual who likes to drag everyone down in the muck...your wallowing gets old.....OLd.....and saggy just like those.

Go find the balance Daniel son....grasshopper.


add another penny for Skybird.


Personal insults?
:shifty: Thats outta line Ice.
Hey thats Skyboys pic not mine....Outa line was him insulting my post....where is the life experience he speaks from? posting that pic lit my fire ,I was not speaking to him the thread is Kaps.
I just showed the shadow side of that criminal idiocy you were propagating. that today the church still is preaching this sh!t of "no condoms, be fruitiful and multiply" ranks amongst crimes comparing to what the Nazis did - just that it kills much more people and makes many more people suffering dearly. It kills, it sows suffering and despair. That is not depressive an opinion by me - that is a realistic observation that proud believers that are mercylessly Christian no matter the cost so often just tend to ignore.

Personal ranting like yours does not change the world for the better. Nor does it impress me. It just shows the true spirit behind your facade. That's why I never accepted you to be truly Christian, and never will take you as that - no matter how much dead sccripture you quote.

[Iceman]

Hey Skybird....Just because you cant find a mate who can tolerate you no need to post pictures of your childhood to scare off Kap....you are one negative,depressing individual who likes to drag everyone down in the muck...your wallowing gets old.....OLd.....and saggy just like those.

Go find the balance Daniel son....grasshopper.


add another penny for Skybird.


Personal insults?
:shifty: Thats outta line Ice.
Hey thats Skyboys pic not mine....Outa line was him insulting my post....where is the life experience he speaks from? posting that pic lit my fire ,I was not speaking to him the thread is Kaps.
I just showed the shadow side of that criminal idiocy you were propagating. that today the church still is preaching this sh!t of "no condoms, be fruitiful and multiply" ranks amongst crimes comparing to what the Nazis did - just that it kills much more people and makes many more people suffering dearly. It kills, it sows suffering and despair. That is not depressive an opinion by me - that is a realistic observation that proud believers that are mercylessly Christian no matter the cost so often just tend to ignore.

Personal ranting like yours does not change the world for the better. Nor does it impress me. It just shows the true spirit behind your facade. That's why I never accepted you to be truly Christian, and never will take you as that - no matter how much dead sccripture you quote.

Indeed..let the dead bury the dead.

Marriage was the topic...

Go into it with the mentality of some here and you will reap exactly what you sow...it's not about money...it's about companionship and love...not sex.Maybe that is why as Skybird so eloquently pointed out that all those people starving in Africa and elsewhere only have each other dude....

It ain't about what ya got ...life is about people not possesions.

Live any other way and your in for a lonely and empty life.

[Nerazzurri]

I just showed the shadow side of that criminal idiocy you were propagating. that today the church still is preaching this sh!t of "no condoms, be fruitiful and multiply" ranks amongst crimes comparing to what the Nazis did - just that it kills much more people and makes many more people suffering dearly. It kills, it sows suffering and despair. That is not depressive an opinion by me - that is a realistic observation that proud believers that are mercylessly Christian no matter the cost so often just tend to ignore.

Personal ranting like yours does not change the world for the better. Nor does it impress me. It just shows the true spirit behind your facade. That's why I never accepted you to be truly Christian, and never will take you as that - no matter how much dead sccripture you quote.

Sky, there was no need to 'show' such a disturbing image. If you'd like to talk about such things, then go right ahead, this is a forum (a place for discussion, not a gallery) after all.

[Wave Skipper]

don't

[baggygreen]

I have to agree with Sky's sentiment, in that the church refuses to adapt itself to the modern age (as far as i see).

I know a person who has been married no less than 4 times now, and every time they try to find a big church and so on.

Actuallu that makes me think, what say you all on a person who wants to get married in white, in a church, but for the tradition of it rather than the beliefs?

[Ducimus]

Most of the stuff surrounding marriage has more to do with tradition then religion i think. Even non religous people get married, more or less, just like the religious ones . (find a church, rent the tux, the pastor, the recepton,etc etc) Its tradition, its just simply how its done. Not much else to it i think.

[bookworm_020]

Getting close to the 1st anniversary of our wedding, so I can't speak with the same experience as others who have posted here. Why get married? Comes down to some simple truths.
It shows a level of commitment, more than just staying partners and that you wish to be with forever, through good and bad. Some say that you can do that without being married, and some do, but many don't (so do married people, but at least there is a greater effort made by most).

Why did I get married? Because I found some one whom I love, share intrests and hold simlar views with (She won't watch Das Boot, but I don't watch her horror films!;)) and I can't imagine or wish to send the rest of my life with anyone else.:sunny:

[Iceman]

Getting close to the 1st anniversary of our wedding, so I can't speak with the same experience as others who have posted here. Why get married? Comes down to some simple truths.
It shows a level of commitment, more than just staying partners and that you wish to be with forever, through good and bad. Some say that you can do that without being married, and some do, but many don't (so do married people, but at least there is a greater effort made by most).

Why did I get married? Because I found some one whom I love, share intrests and hold simlar views with (She won't watch Das Boot, but I don't watch her horror films!;)) and I can't imagine or wish to send the rest of my life with anyone else.:sunny:
Take comfort in that alot of things come with time...she will be watching Das Boot eventually...I guarentee. :) :up: and you will be watching the horror flicks...:o :cry: