Linton
10-30-07, 09:14 AM
Obituary
Today we mourn the passing of an old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were lost long ago in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as, knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair and maybe it was my fault.
Common sense lived by by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were put in place. Reports of a 6 year old charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate, teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch etc. Teachers suspended or fired for reprimanding unruly pupils only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children, and when everyone blamed society for their failures.
It declined even further when schools were required to get parental approval to administer Aspirin, sun lotion or even a plaster to a student - but could not inform a parent when a student became pregnant and wanted an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the 10 commandments became contraband, churches became businesses and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself or your family from a burglar in your own home, and the burglar can sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in his death by his parents, Trust and Truth, his wife, Discretion, his daughter, Responsibility, and his son, Reason.
He is survived by his three step brothers, I know my rights, Someone else is to blame, and I'm a victim.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
Shamelessly stolen from Rum Ration.
Today we mourn the passing of an old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were lost long ago in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as, knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair and maybe it was my fault.
Common sense lived by by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were put in place. Reports of a 6 year old charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate, teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch etc. Teachers suspended or fired for reprimanding unruly pupils only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children, and when everyone blamed society for their failures.
It declined even further when schools were required to get parental approval to administer Aspirin, sun lotion or even a plaster to a student - but could not inform a parent when a student became pregnant and wanted an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the 10 commandments became contraband, churches became businesses and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself or your family from a burglar in your own home, and the burglar can sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in his death by his parents, Trust and Truth, his wife, Discretion, his daughter, Responsibility, and his son, Reason.
He is survived by his three step brothers, I know my rights, Someone else is to blame, and I'm a victim.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
Shamelessly stolen from Rum Ration.