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High Voltage
02-05-07, 12:11 AM
Howdy friends,

I just had to post this: I will be in Chicago later on this month and am planning to go see...THIS!!!!:rock::rock::rock:

Oh yeah, may the Great Ghost of Admiral Doenitz curse you all for having introduced me to this devious life of never-ending patrols!!!:x:x:x

Cheers,
High Voltage

Gezoes
02-05-07, 03:15 AM
Ehrm... you're seeing... Chuck Norris?

:cool:

The Noob
02-05-07, 04:12 AM
If YOU CAN see chuck norris, he can see YOU. If you CANT see chuck norris, you are seconds away from your death. :rotfl:

I love chuck norris jokes..:D

Jimbuna
02-05-07, 04:26 AM
Whose Chuck Norris ? :hmm:
Don't you mean that movie star Chucky :p

Kaleu_Mihoo
02-05-07, 05:04 AM
you mean THIS Chuck Norris, the only person in the whole universe who can slam a revolving door? :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Woof1701
02-05-07, 07:14 AM
Well, I guess if he's going to Chicago to see something and he's posting it here, he probably will be visiting U-505, right?

Have fun and bring back some photos! :up:

CptGrayWolf
02-05-07, 07:19 AM
Chicago eh...:hmm: I say he's going to go see Oprah.

AVGWarhawk
02-05-07, 09:09 AM
Chicago eh...:hmm: I say he's going to go see Oprah.

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Maybe she is giving out cars again!

Tachyon
02-05-07, 09:15 AM
Does she give Volkswagens?

_Seth_
02-05-07, 10:00 AM
http://www.boingboing.net/hunting%20copy.jpg

The Noob
02-05-07, 10:13 AM
http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h293/thenamesjimjones/Chuck-Norris.jpg

To all you halo players, ever wondered who is under the mask? I found out... :D
http://www.joystiq.com/media/2006/02/mastacheifunmaskedjoy.jpg

By the way...
********

But hes great to poke fun at! :D

High Voltage
02-05-07, 10:58 AM
Woooaaahhhh:oops::oops::oops::oops::oops:
Super Embarassed...

Woof1701, I applaud you for your educated guess..and yes, i will bring back pics; has anyone been to this exhibit yet?

here's the link: http://www.msichicago.org/exhibit/U505/index.html

BTW. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants. ;)

and of course...
Chuck Norris owns the greatest poker face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 world series of poker despite him holding just a joker, a 2 of clubs, a 7 of spades, and a green number 4 from Uno and a monopoly 'get out of jail free' card.

mookiemookie
02-05-07, 11:01 AM
You lucky lucky dog. For your homework assignment, I want you to bring back at least 50 pictures. Bring a fresh memory card for your camera! :know:

High Voltage
02-05-07, 02:08 PM
I plan on filling up my 4 Gig card with pics and videos!!!
Oh, and i just can't resist:

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

:smug::smug::smug::smug:

Curval
02-05-07, 02:48 PM
-Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
-Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard.
-Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
-Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
-Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs
-Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
-Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't **** with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.
-To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and aquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong.
-Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
-Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of "beard". Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus' obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.
-If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
-Chuck Norris can make a woman climax by simply pointing at her and saying "booya".
-There are no disabled people. Only people who have met Chuck Norris.
-Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
-Chuck Norris won 'Jumanji' without ever saying the word. He simply beat the living **** out of everything that was thrown at him, and the game forfeited.
-Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
-Filming on location for Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought a stillborn baby lamb back to life by giving it a prolonged beard rub. Shortly after the farm animal sprang back to life and a crowd had gathered, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the animal, breaking its neck, to remind the crew once more that Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away.
-When Chuck Norris plays Oregon Trail his family does not die from cholera or dysentery, but rather roundhouse kicks to the face. He also requires no wagon, since he carries the oxen, axels, and buffalo meat on his back. He always makes it to Oregon before you.
-Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
-Chuck Norris frequently signs up for beginner karate classes, just so he can "accidentally" beat the **** out of little kids.
-After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. His reasoning? It was more "humane".
-Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris
-The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris's fist.
-One day Chuck Norris looked in the mirror and said "No one outstares Chuck!" He is still there to this day.
-Chuck Norris owns neither microwave nor oven. When he is hungry, he simply shouts "BAKE" to his food, and out of fear, the food instantly catches on fire
-Chuck Norris doesnt shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.
-Chuck Norris appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."
-When Chuck Norris's wife burned the turkey one Thanksgiving, Chuck said, "Don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris."
-Chuck Norris can eat a Rubix Cube and poop it out solved.

Boris
02-05-07, 03:05 PM
LOL. Chuck Norris...

http://www.weebls-stuff.com/toons/ultimate+showdown/

John|Blackthorne
02-05-07, 03:26 PM
:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
Some real good ones there.
Real nice. :D

Gezoes
02-05-07, 03:32 PM
Well, Chuck hit the spot alright LMAO! :rotfl:

And yes, bring back pictures! ;)

CptGrayWolf
02-06-07, 05:20 AM
What's with all the Chuck Norris jokes? Is it the new hip thing to do with the kids these days? I'm so out of the loop. :nope:

Abd_von_Mumit
02-06-07, 05:32 AM
What's with all the Chuck Norris jokes? Is it the new hip thing to do with the kids these days? I'm so out of the loop. :nope:
No. It's allready became old-styled and I don't think that there are many people that still laugh on these jokes. :) But a year or two ago... Every place I went these jokes were around me. No place to hide, they were even in the bus, in the shop, in the radio... I hope they'll vanish soon. :D

STEED
02-06-07, 05:35 AM
Chuck Norris for president of the U.S.A :up:

Jimbuna
02-06-07, 05:47 AM
Chuck Norris for president of the U.S.A :up:

Or even the Queen of England :up: :hmm: :damn:

CptGrayWolf
02-06-07, 06:12 AM
What's with all the Chuck Norris jokes? Is it the new hip thing to do with the kids these days? I'm so out of the loop. :nope:
No. It's allready became old-styled and I don't think that there are many people that still laugh on these jokes. :) But a year or two ago... Every place I went these jokes were around me. No place to hide, they were even in the bus, in the shop, in the radio... I hope they'll vanish soon. :D

:lol:

Boris
02-06-07, 11:46 AM
More for chuck norris fans:

http://legendofchucknorris.com/

Jimbuna
02-06-07, 12:06 PM
So.....what's all this got to do with the little short ar*e DeVito ? :hmm:

STEED
02-06-07, 02:19 PM
Chuck Norris for president of the U.S.A :up:

Or even the Queen of England :up: :hmm: :damn:

The Queen.:o :lol: :lol:

johan_d
02-06-07, 03:06 PM
All, yes I ment Alll Chuck his movies are blown away with the performance of this man..Bruno Ganz

I rest my case..:know:

Jimbuna
02-06-07, 03:58 PM
All, yes I ment Alll Chuck his movies are blown away with the performance of this man..Bruno Ganz

I rest my case..:know:

:o WTF!!...who the hell is Bruno Ganz ? :hmm:

Just found him, he played Adolf Hitler in Der Untergang :yep: A good film that one :yep: and a fine part he took/portrayed :up:

The Noob
02-06-07, 04:21 PM
Damnit, im just too slow. I always find and laught at stuff thats already old since 6 months... :damn:





.......or 3 years :lol: