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Old 03-27-09, 12:28 AM   #1
Capt Squid
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The NEW Moulin Rouge

It had to happen and you know it. We've got a new building that has been billed as being G/K proof.

Has anyone seen Phil around? Last we heard, he was destitute and had crawled into a case of MadChuck 20/20.

Chad, you should be legal now.
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Old 03-27-09, 10:04 PM   #2
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The trucks started arriving at the loading docks, laden with the finest spirits available. Fine sherry wines from Jerez, Kentucky Bourbon, Single Malts from the Highlands, you name it, it was there.

The breweries came and installed the equipment for the beer and even started giving free samples to get the patrons hooked on their particular brews.

Furnishings and restaurant equipment started showing up later.
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Old 03-31-09, 04:22 PM   #3
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Where is the Phil Red Label? Errr...where is Phil?
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Old 03-31-09, 07:27 PM   #4
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Gunter bellied up to the bar and Squid took out a frosty mug from the cooler and walked to the tap. He reached and pulled the tap down and ...

POOF..........!!!

Out goes the power.

Kirk (From basement): SORRY!!!

A few moments later...........the power returns...a bit brighter than normal.

Squid again reaches for the tap.....BRRRRRRRRRZZZZZZAPPPP!!

Squid: AIYEEEE!!

POOF ......!!!!

Kirk (From basement): SORRY!!! I knew I should have cut the blue wire!!

*CLICK*

A flashlight illuminates Squid and Gunter.

Jester: I thought we did away with G/K Electrical?

Gunter: We did....but damn if they didn't come back at us for breach of contract and threatened a lawsuit.

Jester: Let me guess....the Three Amigo lawyers?

Gunter: Yep. Dewey Cheatham & Howe.

Jester splashed a Phil Red label over Squid to wake him up.

Jester: You Ok there ol' buddy?
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Old 03-31-09, 07:52 PM   #5
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S: Unhhhh. What <smoke rings> hit me?

J: Kirk strikes again.

S: Find Derschowitz. I don't care if he's slinging burgers over at Taco King. Then, give Kirk his book and tell him to study it.

G: Let's just try an experiment while we're waiting, huh? <hands CS a CFL bulb> Here. Hold on to the base.

<< Light shines brightly from the bulb.>>

J & G: Uncle Fester!

S: Very funny.

J & G: We thought so!
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Old 03-31-09, 07:57 PM   #6
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I guess it's time to hang this ole picture up on the barroom wall.

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Old 04-04-09, 05:35 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Capt Squid View Post
ItHas anyone seen Phil around? Last we heard, he was destitute and had crawled into a case of MadChuck 20/20.
Destitute, dissolute and desperate. And I know where he is, but he asked me not to tell anyone just yet. Especially Kirk.
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Old 04-04-09, 08:07 PM   #8
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"Hey now!...Look who I found...its the Viper....the vindow viper....but anywho,I found Phil,hes still inside a coffee can hibernating in the basement...or he was till I started a game of kick the can..
Phil Ale,..dirty glass, please."
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Old 04-04-09, 08:44 PM   #9
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That wasn't Phil. That might have been his cousin, Curly. Or maybe Oddball. Gunter says Phil is on assignment and Sailor Steve says he ain't tellin' nobody where Phil is hiding.

Here, Kirk. Have a crunchy egg salad sandwich. Someone screwed up the beer dispenser.
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Old 04-05-09, 04:24 PM   #10
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At the bar,near the beer dispenser....

Jester noticed a toolbox and black boots sticking out from under the beer dispenser,
"Kirk!...tell me your not tinkering again."

"Relax my young apprentice,.it just needs a ,NEW flux coil in the wave guide.
..AND a load drop on the DC inverter high side."

Jester eyed the GK box on the floor,"GK World Wide Electronics!Jeez ,Squid will have a fit."

"Hand me the Flux capacitor and that ..ROUND, thing ..with the stripes."
. Kirk said as he eased the 440 line under the bar.
"Careful ..that THING.. with the stripes is Hot...or was that the ground?..
.Whatever,the modified Sine wave will..
. Have,.... the beer flowing at just under 4 PSI and with a foam reduction of 25% ,the amperage will,.
.DRAW down to JUST 1.6...Squid will be serving Phil Ale at ..
..TWICE the rate as... Yesterday,...OMG, I'm a GIT and didn't know it.."

Jester turned to go,"Anyone ever tell you that you talk kind'ah funny?"

"NO,why would ..THEY ..say that?"
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Old 04-06-09, 10:18 PM   #11
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Walking in behind the building, Squid is inspecting the security system. CCD cameras, ground motion sensors, electric eyes, even low-light and thermal sensors -- yep, Jester came through with all the .... Waitaminit! When was that high-tension line installed? "Jester!"

J: "Yes, boss?"

CS: "Where and when was that high-tension line installed? Isn't this place wired for 220 only?"

J: "Well, ah, erm, you see..."

CS: "This smells an awful lot like Kirk. OK, spill the beans. What has he done now?"

J: "What makes you think I know anything?"

CS: "Cuz you develop a nervous tic every time you get caught with your hand in the cookie jar. Now, GIVE!"

J: "I, ah, did see him coming up from the cellar and..."

CS: "The cellar?!?!?! OMG! That's where the beer is stored! Quick! We gotta see what he did!"

The pair make their way into the cellar and over to the beer storage vats. Physically, nothing appeared out of the ordinary. Then they noticed that the line pressure was not at the normal 3-5 psi; it was now reading 4500 psi!

Both: "THE BEER TAPS!"

Upstairs at the bar, Sailor Steve was starting to draw a pint when Jester and Capt Squid came racing up the stairs. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!" Too late! The beer came shooting out, blew the stein out of SS's hand and blew a hole through the floor.

KIRK!
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