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Gut Wrench · 09-06-20, 10:13 PM

COMMISSIONERS PRESS CONFERENCE
Major Announcement

The season has even started and we have our first major announcement. We go live to the conference now...

Commissioner: We're going to make this quick so you people can get back to regularly scheduled program.

The World has been dealing with the Covid situation, and the other major sporting leagues across the globe have enacted measures to ensure, both player and fan safety. The Subsim Fantasy Football League is no exception, and I'm here to announce, this evening, the first major response to the Covid situation.

In Australia, the government approach to returning citizens has been to quarantine for fourteen days upon arrival into the country, and prior to continuing to their final destination. This mandate would not work for our sole Australian Team, the Taipans, nor for the remainder of the league that is scheduled to play in Australia.

In conjunction with the Australian government, the Australian Taipans, and an American city, in order to prevent the further spread of Covid and maintain the integrity of the league, the Australian Taipans will be playing all their home games on US soil. A stadium has been secured for them, and for this season, they will be known as the Australian Taipans of Southern California,

The Taipans will play their home games as scheduled at Jack Murphy Stadium, also known as Qualcomm, in San Diego. This is an appropriate venue since being vacated by the Chargers several years ago. The decision to place the Taipans here stems from them being a former Torpedo Bowl Champion, and the greatest concentration of Australians outside of the homeland, is in Southern California.

"Who made the name choice?" - Mike Terico.

Comissioner: The Taipans were initially in talks with the City of Los Angeles, when a representative from a Major League Baseball team, the Anaheim Angels, suggested that they have an extraordinary long name for no apparent reason.

"What about the Nighthawks?" - Joe Buck

Comissioner: We have secured another venue for the Nighthawks in the City of Saint Louis. The Nighthawks after completing the draft, and getting a C grade (snicker snicker) were not allowed re entry into the United Kingdom, and were redirected to Saint Louis, where the league has prepared the stadium, fans, training grounds and strippers, for the arrival of the Nighthawks. For the 2020 season, they will be known as the Helmand Nighthawks; Deployed in Saint Louis. The Nighthawks will be playing in the vacant Edward Jones Dome.

The League has apologized to the teams, the fans and the hookers who follow the teams for this sudden change of home venue for the Covid Year of Fantasy Football. In a stroke of scheduling luck though, both the Nighthawks and the Taipans were scheduled to play the first game of the season as the away team, with the Nighthawks @ Who Dat Nation Rises in Oregon, being our first Match of the Day. This scheduling anomaly will allow both teams an extra week to acclimatize.

09-06-20, 10:13 PM	#2
Gut Wrench Chief Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Everywhere Posts: 321 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	COMMISSIONERS PRESS CONFERENCE Major Announcement The season has even started and we have our first major announcement. We go live to the conference now... Commissioner: We're going to make this quick so you people can get back to regularly scheduled program. The World has been dealing with the Covid situation, and the other major sporting leagues across the globe have enacted measures to ensure, both player and fan safety. The Subsim Fantasy Football League is no exception, and I'm here to announce, this evening, the first major response to the Covid situation. In Australia, the government approach to returning citizens has been to quarantine for fourteen days upon arrival into the country, and prior to continuing to their final destination. This mandate would not work for our sole Australian Team, the Taipans, nor for the remainder of the league that is scheduled to play in Australia. In conjunction with the Australian government, the Australian Taipans, and an American city, in order to prevent the further spread of Covid and maintain the integrity of the league, the Australian Taipans will be playing all their home games on US soil. A stadium has been secured for them, and for this season, they will be known as the Australian Taipans of Southern California, The Taipans will play their home games as scheduled at Jack Murphy Stadium, also known as Qualcomm, in San Diego. This is an appropriate venue since being vacated by the Chargers several years ago. The decision to place the Taipans here stems from them being a former Torpedo Bowl Champion, and the greatest concentration of Australians outside of the homeland, is in Southern California. "Who made the name choice?" - Mike Terico. Comissioner: The Taipans were initially in talks with the City of Los Angeles, when a representative from a Major League Baseball team, the Anaheim Angels, suggested that they have an extraordinary long name for no apparent reason. "What about the Nighthawks?" - Joe Buck Comissioner: We have secured another venue for the Nighthawks in the City of Saint Louis. The Nighthawks after completing the draft, and getting a C grade (snicker snicker) were not allowed re entry into the United Kingdom, and were redirected to Saint Louis, where the league has prepared the stadium, fans, training grounds and strippers, for the arrival of the Nighthawks. For the 2020 season, they will be known as the Helmand Nighthawks; Deployed in Saint Louis. The Nighthawks will be playing in the vacant Edward Jones Dome. The League has apologized to the teams, the fans and the hookers who follow the teams for this sudden change of home venue for the Covid Year of Fantasy Football. In a stroke of scheduling luck though, both the Nighthawks and the Taipans were scheduled to play the first game of the season as the away team, with the Nighthawks @ Who Dat Nation Rises in Oregon, being our first Match of the Day. This scheduling anomaly will allow both teams an extra week to acclimatize. Last edited by Gut Wrench; 09-06-20 at 10:28 PM.